Laureltree Posted January 8, 2006 Report Posted January 8, 2006 The Girl in a WhirlTo:Dr. Suess (a.k.a. Vickie Gunther)Look at me, look at me, look at me now!You could do what I do, If you only knew how.I study the scriptures one hour each day;I bake, I upholster, I scrub, and I pray.I always keep the commandments completely;I speak to my little ones gently and sweetly.I help in their classrooms!I sew all they wear!I drive them to practice!I cut all their hair!I memorize names of the General Authorities;I focus on things to be done by priorities.I play the piano!I bless with my talents!My toilets all sparkle!My checkbooks all balance!Each week every child gets a one-on-one date; I attend all my meetings (on time! Never late!)I'm taking a class on the teachings of Paul,But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all!I track my bad habits ~ til each is abolished;Our t-shirts are ironed! My toenails are polished!Our family home evenings are always delightful;The lessons I give are both fun and insightful.I do genealogy faithfully, too.It's easy to do all the things that I do!I rise each day early, Refreshed and awake;I know all the names of each youth in my stake!I read to my children! I help all my neighbors!I bless the community, too, with all of my labors.I exercise and I cook menus gourmet;My visiting teaching is done the first day!(I also go do it for someone who missed hers.It's the least I can do for my cherished ward sisters.)I chart resolutions and check off each goal;I seek each lost lamb on my Primary roll.I can home-grown produce each summer and fall.But that is not all! Oh, no. That is not all.I write in my journal! I sing in the choir!Each day, I write thank you's to those I admire.My sons were all Eagles when they were fourteen!My kids get straight A's! And their bedrooms are clean!I have a home business to help make some money;I always look beautifully groomed for my honey.I go to the temple at least once a week;I change the car's tires! I fix the sink's leak!I grind my own wheat and I bake all our bread;I have all our meals planned out six months ahead.I make sure I rotate our two-year's supply;My shopping for Christmas is done by July!These things are not hard; It's good if you do them;You can if you try! Just set goals and pursue them!It's easy to do all the things that I do!If you plan and work smart, You can do them all, too!It's easy! She said,And then, she dropped dead. Quote
Justlooking Posted January 8, 2006 Report Posted January 8, 2006 Oh my goodness!!! I am Molly Mormon, and I just thought I was a Martha Stewart fan!!! Loved it... good one LT! Quote
Setheus Posted January 8, 2006 Report Posted January 8, 2006 I'll be in the bathroom for the next little while gagging.... Just kidding. Quote
tngu Posted January 8, 2006 Report Posted January 8, 2006 That was funny. I am relieved to know that I won't be dropping dead anytime soon. I doubt I will even need a nap!! :) Quote
Guest funkyfool416 Posted January 8, 2006 Report Posted January 8, 2006 geez. Wow that would ###### if anyone was really like that. It was a funny one i must admit. Quote
Lindy Posted January 10, 2006 Report Posted January 10, 2006 ROFL LT....Thanks for sharing..... from a NON Molly Mormon.... Quote
Guest sugarbay Posted January 10, 2006 Report Posted January 10, 2006 What a scream! This should be one the Prozac page. Thanks! Quote
Seraphim Moonshadow Posted January 14, 2006 Report Posted January 14, 2006 I'd drop dead before the first paragraph was past. Quote
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