How to find time for spiritual things

[Twisted_Fairytales]

I have 7 week old and 18 month old boys. Its very crazy as you can imagine and Im finding it so hard to even do simple things like go to the bathroom I just havent managed to read my scriptures since DS2 was born and hardly pray. I feed DS to sleep in bed at night so more often than not I fall asleep too without saying prayers. I sometimes feel so overwhelmed with them I just cry. Then I remember I have the gospel and can ask for help and strength but because Ive not been praying or studying I feel so far removed from it. I dont expect to have a sudden answer just because Ive desperately begged for it.

It feels like so long since Ive had a spiritual experience which I desperately want as I think it would keep me going. I just dont know how I find time to do these things, any hints or tips? When they sleep, I sleep or Id not function. I need some time with DH in the evening which after bathtime etc is around 8pm. I just feel so in demand that I dont have time for myself or the gospel

[Gramajane]

I understand that the church has provided the scriptures online, in AUDIO :)

also we are told that the hymns are prayers, so both these things you hopefully can have coming in your ears during your day. I also found playing children singing the primary songs was wonderful to bring the spirit and it also helped my kids to know the words for primary and programs. :)

Then there is the wonderful option of having trade off babysitters. You find other families who will trade to give each other an evening without the kids for a date and no one spends money you many no have.

-- Or often ask your VT if they might each help for one night a month, and maybe trade bargin with some work for them or? Maybe you have the money to hire a good teenage girl who has experience with her own younger brothers and sisters (watch at church for which ones treat their own family great :) also ask other mothers who are the best baby sitters.

Some babysitters will also trade services- I did, getting sewing lessons.

Another thing that really helped me was when I found two other mothers with similar child rearing values/methods with kids near my kids age, and we formed our own three hour morning play group.

So we each got two mornings off, and the kids LOVED it. :0

--- the kids should all be in bed by eight for sure, or even by 7:30, so hopefully you can have time then.

God bless you, it is hard, but worth it! (our youngest daughter has four kids between the ages of 8 and 3 now, and I had five kids but they were all about 2 years apart. )

[Gramajane]

by the way there is a condition that is VERY serious, called postpartum depression

which is more than the usual not getting enough sleep from a newborn, and you can look it up on line. Marie Osmond wrote a book about it as she had it bad, as did her mother, and there are vitamins etc that can help too. We are never alone, even though we may think we are. You can have help, but part of the blessing is in learning to humble yourself and get up your courage to ask. it is all growth. :) God bless you!

[applepansy]

I agree with Gramajane's advice. I would like to add get a priesthood blessing and call the closest temple (if possible) and put your name on the prayer roll. (If a long distance phone call isn't possible then write to the temple: Adelaide Temple contact info)

Having two babies in under two years is tough on your body and I'm sure your hormones are all out of whack. Its highly likely that you have a bit of post partum depression. Talk to your doctor! Enlist help from your husband.

You will get through this difficult time. Ask for help! I remember not having time to go to the bathroom and I remember as the children got a little older and more babies came I couldn't even close the bathroom door.

Now I"m a 54 yo grandmother raising a 4yo. We've had him since he was 17 months old. I often don't get enough sleep. I have health issues which make sleep difficult and then our wonderful grandson goes through times when he's up all night with bad dreams or just because he doesn't think he should sleep all night. Its a real struggle for us right now. He and our son (his dad) came to live with us and I am more Mom than Grandma. He's never slept good for us. His first 17 months were not good and so he didn't learn to sleep well and sometimes was frightened. Going to bed at 8pm only got us all up at 3 or 4 am.

When we're in the middle of something big (such as raising two little ones and recovering from a recent delivery) it seems hard to put spiritual things first. But if you don't fill your cup you're going to get the a point where you don't have anything to give. Its important you take a little time for you. Even if its only 30 minutes. Do you have family close? A neighbor you trust? Gramajane's suggestions about other young mothers or teenagers is a good one but also talk to your RS president. She might have some suggestions. There might be a grandma in the ward who would love to come and help you out a day or so a week.

Asking for help is hard but its also a blessing. Its a blessing for you and its a blessing for the person who can help you.

[Twisted_Fairytales]

Thank you. I really had never considered audio scriptures or hymns but I can completely see the benefit of playing hyms and primary songs, I think it would calm the children too as they both love me to sing to them. I will be downloading furiously later on! That way I can listen to them in the car while I run errands. What a great idea thank you gramajane. I feel lifted already at the thought of this. My RS oresident is always asking if theres anything she can do-but Im not sure what to ask for really. Baby has to be with me as Im breastfeeding and my toddler doesnt know her so would kick off ifshe tried to take him anywhere. Id feel a bit mercenary asking her to do my housework!!

I do have family close and they do help but they arent with me all the time, and its those times that are hard. I dont believe I have postnatal depression, but I know what signs to look for and Im not one of those people who suffers in silence believe me. I suffer, and you suffer with me lololol.

Thanks for your suggestions so far Im excited to try it out and see what difference this makes to my day :)

[norah63]

For just today it seems like you are living the heart of the gospel. You are lovingand taking good care of precious babies.

That is a most high calling in my mind. Your every sigh of wanting to feel closer to Heavenly Father is showing that you are aware of where your daily help iscoming from. Most of us I am sure have times when we think we should have more reading, and kneeling time. It is the times of feeling weak, that we draw most on Jesus profound love and care.

Many blessings to all today.

[applepansy]

Thank you. I really had never considered audio scriptures or hymns but I can completely see the benefit of playing hyms and primary songs, I think it would calm the children too as they both love me to sing to them. I will be downloading furiously later on! That way I can listen to them in the car while I run errands. What a great idea thank you gramajane. I feel lifted already at the thought of this. My RS oresident is always asking if theres anything she can do-but Im not sure what to ask for really. Baby has to be with me as Im breastfeeding and my toddler doesnt know her so would kick off ifshe tried to take him anywhere. Id feel a bit mercenary asking her to do my housework!!

I do have family close and they do help but they arent with me all the time, and its those times that are hard. I dont believe I have postnatal depression, but I know what signs to look for and Im not one of those people who suffers in silence believe me. I suffer, and you suffer with me lololol.

Thanks for your suggestions so far Im excited to try it out and see what difference this makes to my day :)

Let her come play with your 18mo old while you breastfeed the baby or take a nap. In his own environment he'll get used to her really fast.

[classylady]

I have 7 week old and 18 month old boys. Its very crazy as you can imagine and Im finding it so hard to even do simple things like go to the bathroom I just havent managed to read my scriptures since DS2 was born and hardly pray. I feed DS to sleep in bed at night so more often than not I fall asleep too without saying prayers. I sometimes feel so overwhelmed with them I just cry. Then I remember I have the gospel and can ask for help and strength but because Ive not been praying or studying I feel so far removed from it. I dont expect to have a sudden answer just because Ive desperately begged for it.

It feels like so long since Ive had a spiritual experience which I desperately want as I think it would keep me going. I just dont know how I find time to do these things, any hints or tips? When they sleep, I sleep or Id not function. I need some time with DH in the evening which after bathtime etc is around 8pm. I just feel so in demand that I dont have time for myself or the gospel

Even though it's been quite a few years since my children were little, I still remember those busy, hectic times. I breastfed my babies too, and also fed them in bed. My prayers were often said while I was in bed feeding the little ones. Sometimes I would fall asleep in the middle of my prayers. I used to feel guilty about not being on my knees and praying, but now I'm much more forgiving of myself. I also just tried to always have a prayer in my heart at all times. You do what you have to do. For me, that was the way I could get my prayers done.

When you have toddlers, it seems there is no place for privacy. They follow you everywhere--in the bathroom, kitchen, bedroom, etc. If you try to use the bathroom without them, they are crying or pounding on the door to be let in. Be assured, this will pass. I had seven children, and it seemed like forever before I ever had any privacy. Now, I miss the times of having a young toddler following me around.