shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Hi, I am new here. I've been a lurker for a few days, and have found quite a bit of good info here, as well as some interesting conversation! I am a member, but have only been for about 5 years. I have quite a few questions that I have been unable to have answered to my satisfaction. These issues don't make me want to leave the church, but I do wish I could become more at peace with them. I look at them this way: I've been to many different churches, and I've had problems with all of them. I have fewer issues with this church than any other I've been to though, and I do believe it's true. I'm truly not trying to start trouble here, or sound like an anti with my questions. Just would like to get some others viewpoints... To start with, I have read that the church outlawed polygamy just so that they could become a state. If that is true, then it would seem that some members think it is still OK, but we'll just have to wait until after this life to practice it. If not, then why can men be sealed to more than one woman, but each woman can only be sealed to one man? Any thoughts on this? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 One thought....polygamy was an application of an eternal principle which was focussed upon the hereafter.. It was changed because of the problems with wickedness in high places....and low places.. The church had been under siege...all the men who practiced polygamy were in jail and their families were suffering emensely....The prophet was under siege....and when John Taylor became president...he had to be in hiding so as to stay out of jail and keep the church together... It's too bad you don't live in Utah...channel 7 has a lot of documentaries on the church and state history. It is all very balanced and as unbiased as you can get on these two subjects. It was necessary to mandate a cesation of the application of this principle in order to survive as a church...not to become a state...though that was being suggested at the time.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 So it sounds to me that you don't have a problem with polygamy. Some people in the church act as if it is something the church used to do, but has nothing to do with anymore. If I may ask a personal question, did you grow up in the church? It seems to me that people who have always been members are OK with it. Converts (as a rule) just can't grasp it - unless the convert is a male, of course! I know this is a huge generalization. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srm Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Originally posted by shanstress70@Mar 25 2004, 05:24 PM Hi, I am new here. I've been a lurker for a few days, and have found quite a bit of good info here, as well as some interesting conversation! I am a member, but have only been for about 5 years. I have quite a few questions that I have been unable to have answered to my satisfaction. These issues don't make me want to leave the church, but I do wish I could become more at peace with them. I look at them this way: I've been to many different churches, and I've had problems with all of them. I have fewer issues with this church than any other I've been to though, and I do believe it's true. I'm truly not trying to start trouble here, or sound like an anti with my questions. Just would like to get some others viewpoints... To start with, I have read that the church outlawed polygamy just so that they could become a state. If that is true, then it would seem that some members think it is still OK, but we'll just have to wait until after this life to practice it. If not, then why can men be sealed to more than one woman, but each woman can only be sealed to one man?Any thoughts on this? We stopped practicing it bacause of political presure AND (more importantly) because the Lord revealed that we should.We do not practice it now but we feel that it can be practiced in the celestial kingdom. Ergo; a man can be sealed to more than one spouse. BTW...a woman can be sealed to more than one spouse too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 I've always heard that a woman can only be sealed to one man. For example, if she is sealed to her husband, he dies, and she is married again. She has to make a decision whether she is to be stayed sealed to her first husband, or somehow be unsealed from him before she can be sealed to her present husband. Is this not true? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
srm Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Originally posted by shanstress70@Mar 25 2004, 05:59 PM I've always heard that a woman can only be sealed to one man. For example, if she is sealed to her husband, he dies, and she is married again. She has to make a decision whether she is to be stayed sealed to her first husband, or somehow be unsealed from him before she can be sealed to her present husband. Is this not true? No, she can be sealed to both...She'll get to decide later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Originally posted by shanstress70@Mar 25 2004, 05:49 PM So it sounds to me that you don't have a problem with polygamy. Some people in the church act as if it is something the church used to do, but has nothing to do with anymore. If I may ask a personal question, did you grow up in the church? It seems to me that people who have always been members are OK with it. Converts (as a rule) just can't grasp it - unless the convert is a male, of course! I know this is a huge generalization. Yes I was raised in the church. I believe that polygamy is just one of many possible applications of the eternal marriage principle.Just as the principle of sacrifice has evolved from one application to another...so it is with this eternal principle. The principle of eternal marriage is not changed just because it's application has. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kevin Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Originally posted by srm+Mar 25 2004, 06:00 PM--></span><table border='0' align='center' width='95%' cellpadding='3' cellspacing='1'><tr><td>QUOTE (srm @ Mar 25 2004, 06:00 PM)</td></tr><tr><td id='QUOTE'> <!--QuoteBegin--shanstress70@Mar 25 2004, 05:59 PM I've always heard that a woman can only be sealed to one man. For example, if she is sealed to her husband, he dies, and she is married again. She has to make a decision whether she is to be stayed sealed to her first husband, or somehow be unsealed from him before she can be sealed to her present husband. Is this not true? No, she can be sealed to both...She'll get to decide later. If this used to be true I believe it is no longer. I think a woman can now only be sealed to one man - before she is able to be sealed to another she must receive a cancellation of the first. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 If this used to be true I believe it is no longer. I think a woman can now only be sealed to one man - before she is able to be sealed to another she must receive a cancellation of the first. This may be true of living women...but the dead are allowed to be sealed to more than one....because they aren't here to decide for themselves.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 This may be true of living women...but the dead are allowed to be sealed to more than one....because they aren't here to decide for themselves.. I don't understand what you mean by that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 When my mother was trying to do the work for her great great grandmother, she found that this little woman had been sealed to her first husband...but left him and got a civil divorce because he was abusive. She later married another man, but was unable to be sealed to him because of not getting a temple divorce (which was very difficult if not imposible back then)...but my mother was so impressed that this woman wanted to have the work done for her in getting her sealed to her 2nd husband that my mother personally worked at it for about 10 years...this was back in the 60s-70s.. Finally the church allowed her to do the work so that this little woman was sealed to her 2nd husband as well. They made it policy at that time, that if there was a question as to which husband to seal the dead women to....they were to seal them to all of them...and allow them to make the decision on the other side... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 This may be true of living women...but the dead are allowed to be sealed to more than one....because they aren't here to decide for themselves.. They made it policy at that time, that if there was a question as to which husband to seal the dead women to....they were to seal them to all of them...and allow them to make the decision on the other side...The first quote is confusing to me. You're implying that someone else decides for them. But then you say that she is allowed to make that decision on the other side. That makes more sense! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Originally posted by shanstress70@Mar 25 2004, 06:50 PM This may be true of living women...but the dead are allowed to be sealed to more than one....because they aren't here to decide for themselves.. They made it policy at that time, that if there was a question as to which husband to seal the dead women to....they were to seal them to all of them...and allow them to make the decision on the other side...The first quote is confusing to me. You're implying that someone else decides for them. But then you say that she is allowed to make that decision on the other side. That makes more sense! Okay...the living woman can get a temple divorce and be sealed to her second husband...if found worthy...I don't know what exactly you mean....others making the decision for them? the living? or the dead? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AFDaw Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 In other words a living woman can make the choice about which man she wants to be sealed to, but one who has passed on and is having the work done for her, can not make that choice, so the sealings are done for both men so that SHE can decide on the other side which man she wishes to be sealed to. Right? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Starsky Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Right! Thank you AFDaw. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 ANYWHO... It seems like everyone here is OK with 'eventual polygamy'. I'm still not OK with it. I'll think of my next question... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AFDaw Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 I'm not ok with it in my current frame of thinking, but I know that I don't know everything. I honestly believe that when the time comes, we'll have all the knowledge and maybe then it will make more sense. Also, I've been told that the wife will have the ultimate say so about whether or not their husband can participate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faerie Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Never thought about it like that!! Makes sense though..thanks for clearing that up!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Hey AF! Please try to remember where you heard/read that. That is very interesting. Not to be a Doubting Thomas, but sometimes I feel that people in the church tell you what you want to hear. For example, I've heard so many times that women can't hold the priesthood because they don't need to. Men need it in order to be more disciplined. I personally think this is bull... just something to make women feel 'special'. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 The only way I'm OK with this entire subject is by telling myself that the worst thing that can happen is that if I die and I don't want to be among a multitude of wives for my husband, but he does decide to practice it, I will decide to live in the Terrestrial Kingdom! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faerie Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Women don't hold the Priesthood because that is not how God ordered the church..simple enough to me :) As far as polygamy..I think that is another one of those "faith testers" I personally have a problem with it in the here and now, but that's not to say that my heart would change if the circumstances goverend it... We have to rememebr that in the eternities our minds and hearts will be perfect, there won't be trivial things like jealousy...so I just don't bother with it..I know I have my husband NOW and we'll worry about AFTERWARDS when we cross that bridge..if ever..lol Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shanstress70 Posted March 26, 2004 Author Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Let me guess... you're not a convert? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AFDaw Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 Well who knows...it may turn out you like the idea more than you thought you would :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AFDaw Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 See Shan...many woman have issues with it, so you're not alone :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Davis Posted March 26, 2004 Report Share Posted March 26, 2004 The official position of the church reads as follows:Living Women A living woman may be sealed to only one husband. If she is sealed to a husband and later divorced, she must receive a cancellation of that sealing from the First Presidency before she may be sealed to another man in her lifetime. Deceased Women A deceased woman may be sealed to all men to whom she was legally married during her life. However, if she was sealed to a husband during her life, all her husbands must be deceased before she can be sealed to a husband to whom she was not sealed during life. Anyone who tells you otherwise is misinformed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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