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[GroundedDreamer]

I am sorry.  This hits a nerve w me.   Probably bc I just went through a divorce after 20+ years and 3 kids bc my husband was shallow.   I am 180 lbs after 7 pregnancies and not the 140lbs I was when we married.   I am happy with who I am, he wasn't.    I was definitely more beautiful than him for the first 10 years of our marriage (he was scrawny ) and the last ten - he was prettier (only on the outside ). I am grateful I got to see how shallow his "eternal" love was.   I do feel like you should be focused on who she is on the inside.   Gaining some weight and letting herself go are two different things. I am sure u look older and maybe a little pudgier.  Having babies is really hard on the body- so are health problems.  I am glad u see the error in your thinking and are trying to reconcile.   Good luck