I Don't Go To Service Any Longer

[kona0197]

I've been an investigator for most of this year. I've even quit smoking with help from the Church. I've even gone as far as buying a few quad sets of scriptures and other books and have many LDS pictures on the wall including one of the Portland Temple. So what would make me quit attending Service on Sunday? Well the simple fact that I can never become a Member.

You see I live with my Girlfriend of 8 years. She used to be a Member but was excommunicated because I started living with her back in '99. She is on Social Security. Should we get married she would lose that income.

We rely on that income to live. So as you can see we can't get married. The Church would be asking us to live off of a little over 600 dollars a month before tithing for bills and food that equal well over a 1000 dollars a month.

Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members.

Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

[Kate]

I've been an investigator for most of this year. I've even quit smoking with help from the Church. I've even gone as far as buying a few quad sets of scriptures and other books and have many LDS pictures on the wall including one of the Portland Temple. So what would make me quit attending Service on Sunday? Well the simple fact that I can never become a Member.

You see I live with my Girlfriend of 8 years. She used to be a Member but was excommunicated because I started living with her back in '99. She is on Social Security. Should we get married she would lose that income.

We rely on that income to live. So as you can see we can't get married. The Church would be asking us to live off of a little over 600 dollars a month before tithing for bills and food that equal well over a 1000 dollars a month.

Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members.

Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

I would have to question why you are living off of your girlfriend before even addressing your complaint that the church asks too much from us. If you truly respect your girlfriend, then stop using her.

~Kate

[kona0197]

Sorry - I forgot to add that I work at Walmart and make the "bulk" of our income. I by no means use her. It's usually all split down the middle. There have been times that she supported me while I was out of work. Those times didn't last long. Right now I'm paying the bills.

[Kate]

Sorry - I forgot to add that I work at Walmart and make the "bulk" of our income. I by no means use her. It's usually all split down the middle. There have been times that she supported me while I was out of work. Those times didn't last long. Right now I'm paying the bills.

Ok, but let me enlighten you a little. If she lost her membership because of living with you without being married, then marrying her would allow her to get back on the path that will truly make her happy. Blessings come from doing the right thing. You would make her a respectable woman as well. No girl wants to feel like she is not worth marrying. By saying that the money is more important than your love for her, it really tells her how you feel. Do you realize that though it might be hard in the beginning financially, the joy that would come from her bringing the Gospel back into her life as well as you learning and gaining faith in the truth of the Gospel would be worth way more than the amount of money you would lose. A woman wants a real man anyway. One who will step up to the plate and do what it takes to take care of things. I know you have questions that concern you, but until you allow a little faith into your heart and a true desire to know of the truth of the Gospel, you will not understand, and yes, you will think members are just following blindly. You cannot yet understand the power of the spirit to teach and testify to you the truth of all things that you learn. But you can if you plant a seed of faith.

Without that, you will just post questions that show your antagnostic attitude.

[kona0197]

Hey I wanted to get married but she has said she does not want to because of the money situation. So we are stuck in a hard place.

[LdsNana]

I've been an investigator for most of this year. I've even quit smoking with help from the Church. I've even gone as far as buying a few quad sets of scriptures and other books and have many LDS pictures on the wall including one of the Portland Temple. So what would make me quit attending Service on Sunday? Well the simple fact that I can never become a Member.

You see I live with my Girlfriend of 8 years. She used to be a Member but was excommunicated because I started living with her back in '99. She is on Social Security. Should we get married she would lose that income.

We rely on that income to live. So as you can see we can't get married. The Church would be asking us to live off of a little over 600 dollars a month before tithing for bills and food that equal well over a 1000 dollars a month.

Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members.

Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

$1000.00 is a mere pittance to the Lord, when he is offering you Eternal Life! When you counsel with those that are trying to assist you both, what do they tell you to do? Big deal if she loses that income. The Church is not asking you to give up anything that is rightfully yours in the first place. Sounds to me as though you know the church is true and you are looking for excuses NOT to start living it?

You mention, I believe... that you live in Portland, right? Possibly you could find a better job than Walmart, or perhaps a second job? Anything to make your life square with the Lord would be better than running from Him. I believe IF you will do the right thing and exercise FAITH in Jesus Christ, he will bless the both of you beyond your expectations. Don't you believe that he will do this for you?

All you need to do is trust in Him and DO that which He has asked you to DO.

Simple fact... you are putting up your own barriers my friend? Now tear those walls down NOW! Those are mere excuses only... nothing that God cannot work with, if ye have FAITH.

[kona0197]

Well I thought I was happy before I got into the Church. I don't think I have prayed about it but I know it's true somehow because I fit in better at LDS Churches than I do elsewhere. Our Bishop is waiting for a date to marry us. That's up to her. I'm pretty sure we can make it off my income alone as Walmart is a great place to work.

Kate - I'm sorry if I sound antagnostic to you. I'm just trying to understand some things in my life.

[LdsNana]

Well I thought I was happy before I got into the Church. I don't think I have prayed about it but I know it's true somehow because I fit in better at LDS Churches than I do elsewhere. Our Bishop is waiting for a date to marry us. That's up to her. I'm pretty sure we can make it off my income alone as Walmart is a great place to work.

Kate - I'm sorry if I sound antagnostic to you. I'm just trying to understand some things in my life.

Fast and pray about all of this, but it sounds to me as though you know what you need to do.

We will be rooting for you completely. No matter what this lovely girl does though, I think that you need to move forward with what YOU know is right. Besides, I think she will come along IF you are a strong leader. But she may give you a bit of opposition right now, so you may need to be quite firm in letting her know that you are truly serious about her and the Gospel and making a RIGHT life for you both. She might be resistant right now because she may have let that dream die, perhaps? You just might need to work very hard to help her lift herself back up and believe again...

I know you can do this for the both of you! How exciting. The gospel truly changes lives and it will yours, in the most wonderful ways...

[kona0197]

I haven't fasted nor prayed in a while it seems. I probably will not act on this for some time. I'm still investigating the Church as there are some teaching I really do not agree with at all. There is some Church history I don't agree with. There are some scriptures I don't understand and there are some I find disturbing. So I'll let you all know what happens next.

As I understand Mormon teachings if we continue to live like this we will end up in the middle kingdom in the end and not what you guys call Hell. That's not so bad since I don't have a goal set to reach the highest kingdom as I don't know what the highest kingdom is like so why try attaining it? Second best is good enough. Anything but outer darkness.

I will keep you guys posted.

[avatar4321]

I've been an investigator for most of this year. I've even quit smoking with help from the Church. I've even gone as far as buying a few quad sets of scriptures and other books and have many LDS pictures on the wall including one of the Portland Temple. So what would make me quit attending Service on Sunday? Well the simple fact that I can never become a Member.

You see I live with my Girlfriend of 8 years. She used to be a Member but was excommunicated because I started living with her back in '99. She is on Social Security. Should we get married she would lose that income.

We rely on that income to live. So as you can see we can't get married. The Church would be asking us to live off of a little over 600 dollars a month before tithing for bills and food that equal well over a 1000 dollars a month.

Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members.

Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

When the Lord commands it, DO IT!

I was reading the new manual yesterday and this chapters seems very appropriate for you right now.

As well as an answer to your questions:

“A religion that does not require the sacrifice of all things never has power proficient to produce the faith necessary unto life and salvation; for, from the first existence of man, the faith necessary unto the enjoyment of life and salvation never could be obtained without the sacrifice of all earthly things. It was through this sacrifice, and this only, that God has ordained that men should enjoy eternal life.” (Lectures on Faith, comp. N. B. Lundwall, Salt Lake City: N. B. Lundwall, n.d., p. 58.)

If you want to get married and join the Church, exercise some faith. Talk to the Lord about what is keeping you from it. Talk to the Bishop. Together with your girlfriend come up with a plan so that you can move towards the blessings you want.

Do you want to be relying on the government all your life to sustain yourself? Do you want to remain unmarried and reliant, or would you rather be self reliant and married to the woman that you love?

It may take some effort. That's not a bad thing. it may take some sacrifice. But I think the questions you need to ask is whether you want the blessings you can have and what you need to do to recieve them.

[Dale]

Which LDS teachings are you questioning?

The LDS Church does expect a lot from it's members. It would be nice of they bent the rules to help out people like you. But that's not going to be the case. You will have to decide whether church membership is important enough for you to cease thing's LDS consider sins. Eventually you will have to marry the girl, or live in sin forever.

What if you think some of the LDS standards might be, or are man made? You could spend a life writings letters to the LDS leadership trying to get them to change. All your letters will get is probably a rejection of your criticism The early LDS used to observe the Word of Wisdom without commandment or constraint. I recall an old quote from Brigham Young where he thought it was ok for a leader to go home and have a cup of tea. But it's observance was made mandatory to be in good standing for LDS members at some point. It's one of those things you have to live with as an LDS person.

Why are they so strict? One possibility is LDS leaders got carried away with standards at some point. Another option is they felt God was tired of messing around with tolerating Word of Wisdom breaking for example. But i really think it was the fact LDS feel Temple's to them are a sacred place. So to prepare people to go to the temple they feel God wanted participants to observe the WOW. But i also think it was LDS missionaries. They did want missionaries in the field drinking coffee. They wanted LDS missionaries to have a good image as living good standards with the public. So living those standards before baptism for new members became required.

[imported_MaioCampo]

Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members.

Consider that it is not the Church that is asking "so much" from the members, but instead it is God.

Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

Heh, heh... true faith is somewhat blind, that is why it is faith.

I'm with Dale in asking, what specifically are you having problems with? The Internet is a marvelous place in which to air concerns that you feel too uncomfortable airing in the real world. Take advantage of it, be open to the answers given, and make prayer a part of pondering the answers given.

The best advice I personally can give, as someone who struggles with faith himself, is to relax... take things slowly and as they come. No pressure, only the eternal well-being of yourself and those you love is at stake. Heh, heh.

[LdsNana]

I haven't fasted nor prayed in a while it seems. I probably will not act on this for some time. I'm still investigating the Church as there are some teaching I really do not agree with at all. There is some Church history I don't agree with. There are some scriptures I don't understand and there are some I find disturbing. So I'll let you all know what happens next.

As I understand Mormon teachings if we continue to live like this we will end up in the middle kingdom in the end and not what you guys call Hell. That's not so bad since I don't have a goal set to reach the highest kingdom as I don't know what the highest kingdom is like so why try attaining it? Second best is good enough. Anything but outer darkness.

I will keep you guys posted.

It is the fasting and prayer that will bring you the peace that you desire, which will give you the comfort to move forward in doing that which is right. It is called FAITH, which is not a perfect knowledge of everything in the beginning. Else why the need to have faith if everything was known? Then everybody would be jumping into the baptismal font, right? But that is not the way it works.

FAITH is a trial or a test of the pure in "heart". Our hearts cannot be seen, except by God... only He truly knows you and what you feel and believe about Him and His Gospel. And so when He sends His messengers to the pure in heart and they hear His voice and He calls them... they hear and obey in FAITH, nothing doubting... and choose to follow Him, His example that He first set, by being baptized... it is an outward act of an inward commitment to follow Him on a path to learn of Him and from Him through those He has chosen to serve Him here upon the earth today.

There are so many people who will be there by your side every step of the way to teach you and explain to you everything you need to understand. But the greatest thing that will happen in all of this, is that you will RECEIVE the Gift of the Holy Ghost for yourself.

This is the greatest gift that God can give you here in this life. It is worth more than any material possession that can be had on earth. It will lead you to all knowledge and understanding pertaining to God that you desire to know for yourself. He will teach you literally everything that you desire to know as you righteously search, study and pray with a sincere heart.

Can you imagine having this gift in your life? This is the great reward that comes to all those who enter into the waters of baptism and receive the laying on of hands for the Gift of the Holy Ghost, by those who Hold the Melchizidek Priesthood of God. These keys of priesthood authority are the same keys that were held by the Savior when he was upon the earth and given to Peter.

When the church was restored again in these latter-days, Peter, James and John then appeared to Joseph Smith and conferred this same Priesthood authority and keys upon him to act in the name of Jesus Christ.

Shortly after you are baptized, you too will receive priesthood authority to bless the lives of others as well.

So again, I can only pray that you will begin to exercise more faith in asking Heavenly Father to increase your faith, so that you might receive a more sure witness that joining the church is the right things for you to do.

I testify to you, that I believe with all of my heart, that you would be making the best possible choice that you will ever make in all eternity at this time, right now. I simply have no doubt of this in my heart or mind whatsoever. I know that the church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day-Saints is the only true church upon the face of the earth. I do not say this lightly as many are suggesting today. The word know is to have a sure knowledge of a thing. The thing I know is that God lives and Jesus Christ is His only begotten Son in the flesh. I know without a shadow of a doubt that he walked this earth and lived a life that was perfectly obedient to the will of His Father and in doing so, He set a perfect example for us when he said,"Come follow ME".

My testimony is sure that in Gethsemane, for me he suffered greatly, even more than I can even bear to admit or want to ever know and most likely will ever understand or comprehend. But I know that He did, for I too have suffered when I have failed to remember Him and found myself desperately seeking relief, as I have begged in desperation for Him to Save me... and He sends His kind Spirit and gently lifts me into His loving arms and whispers..."I already have, it is done".

I know He has taken upon Him, one by one, all of our sins and forgiven them, for each and every one of us, as He suffered in Gethsemane and hung on the cross at Calvary, until every last drop of His perfect sacrifice was spilt...

and He hung there until His offering was made an acceptable Sacrifice, Before Whom It Was Given, then Willingly Gave Up His Life... That We Would Have Life! The Greatest WORD Ever Uttered Throughout Eternity to All Eternity...

"It IS Finished".

I know that on the third day that Jesus Christ rose from the Tomb as He said he would, and that He lives today, this DAY! And that we all die and will live in our resurrected bodies united with our spirits inseparably forever, because of Jesus Christ. But, this Plan and it's Purpose IS to bring us back to the Father.

In this most profound and incomprehensible act of perfected love, Jesus Christ broke the bands of death and hell, which restored our ability to progress in returning back into the Presence of our Father in Heaven to inherit that which was His greatest desire for His children. As any perfect father would, He desires that His children have the same kind of Life that He has been blessed to Know.

He is a Perfectly Resurrected and Exalted Being and desires that state of Fullness and Joy for all of His posterity. Therefore, Those of His children who desire this also must accept the same path that He did to attain it... The Plan of Salvation.

And this now is a choice for each individual, as it is placed before them and they DO hear His voice. To Him, to NOT return to Him is simply unacceptable, because He devised a Plan that would RETURN YOU HOME...

Why would you turn Him away when He is pleading with you to come home?

This is my testimony of What I Know in my heart to be the truth. I send this out to you personally and I do so in His Name, even Jesus Christ, my Savior and Redeemer.

Amen

[ztodd]

I haven't fasted nor prayed in a while it seems. I probably will not act on this for some time. I'm still investigating the Church as there are some teaching I really do not agree with at all. There is some Church history I don't agree with. There are some scriptures I don't understand and there are some I find disturbing. So I'll let you all know what happens next.

As I understand Mormon teachings if we continue to live like this we will end up in the middle kingdom in the end and not what you guys call Hell. That's not so bad since I don't have a goal set to reach the highest kingdom as I don't know what the highest kingdom is like so why try attaining it? Second best is good enough. Anything but outer darkness.

I will keep you guys posted.

Sometimes I am tempted by these kinds of thoughts as well. But I gotta remember that God is wise above all and He knows what eternity is. We don't. After spending an eternity in the terrestrial kingdom, we will wake up and realize we are miserable because our progression is halted. It is only in the celestial kingdom that we are able to progress eternally and have eternal joy and increase. Any other kingdom will end up torturous to us.

You blame the strict commandments that you don't understand for keeping you from ever becoming a member. It sounds as though you probably don't have a testimony of the law of chastity yet? If you do, I hope and pray you will have the courage to start living by it. The law of chastity is biblical, so if you have a strong testimony of the bible, you can base it off that. Our physical bodies are precious gifts and are sacred. The law of chastity and the word of wisdom are about respecting the bodies our Father has given us. Obedience or disobedience to these commandments also affects our souls, and affects whether we can have the Spirit with us to guide us in this life.

The Lord's commandments might seem too strict sometimes, but He knows how happy and free we will be if we choose to obey them, and how strong we will become. He doesn't give us any commandment that we are not able to obey. You can do it!

You say you know the church must be true because you fit in better here than in another church? That's good, but that's just a start. You need to really gain your own spiritual testimony based on study and prayer and receiving an answer to your prayers. Is it hard to pray? I know it can be if you haven't done it for a while. But remember God is your Father in Heaven, and you are His child - just talk to Him like a child to his father. He loves you, he will not condemn you. Tell him you're sorry for your sins and you're trying.. and you want to know the truth, and you are willing to follow where He leads. He knows your heart, so be sincere. He wants to hear from you. He wants to bless you, he's just waiting for you to ask. :)

[CourtneyP]

Hey I wanted to get married but she has said she does not want to because of the money situation. So we are stuck in a hard place.

Not to be harsh, but it sounds to me like she's using you, honestly. She's the one living off the government and you supporting her and paying all the bills. You want to make things right and get married and join the church. She seems to be having trouble overcoming her sins and is too dependent on the government money to make ends meet. If I may ask, why can't she go out and get a job? There are some jobs that can be done from home as well that she might want to look into to become truly self-reliant and not depend on Uncle Sam to spot her the money.

Yes, you are stuck in a hard place. But the only way out when you're at the bottom is to go back up again. Let her know of your desire to join the church and let her know that you want her to come with you. Both of you can talk to the Bishop and figure out a solution. I promise, it can be done. :)

[Dale]

I have investigated religion's for many year's. I still have doubt's and questions. You won't find a church that has every official doctrine true. I ceased looking for perfection in religion, and have learn to embrace it with all it's imperfections included. I had this idea once if i just read every book on Mormonism pro-and con i would find perfect solution's to every problem. I have had to accept partial, and imperfect answers. I have found a lot of convincing solution's.

It's important to develop the skill of resolving doubts and question's. FAIR and FAIR Wiki are good places to begin. http://www.fairlds.org

As far as getting married you will want to make a decision sooner, or later. If she get's pregnant she could break up with you and you would still have to pay child support. Relationships involving living together take's responsibility. I am not certain you would have visitation right's as a father if you were never legally married. Divorces do happen, but being legally married is good if you start a family. And even with the best method's of birth control pregnancies do happen.

I am on Social Security myself. I became disabled because of my Multiple Sclerosis. If i could drive i would be working. They do allow you to make so much over what they are paying you without taking away benifits. They do have in my town an Idaho Vocational Rehabilitation outfit. They will help a person that has difficulty seeking regular work to find a job. They hired a person to find work for me. But with my legs not working i had to find a job sitting. And my MS was acting up and i got sick on the job, so that ended my attempts at employment through them. But she i am sure could find a state agency where you live.

One has to be careful to go down to the Social Security office to double check how much she could make. Can she drive? And does she have a car?

[DrewM]

I've been an investigator for most of this year. I've even quit smoking with help from the Church. I've even gone as far as buying a few quad sets of scriptures and other books and have many LDS pictures on the wall including one of the Portland Temple. So what would make me quit attending Service on Sunday? Well the simple fact that I can never become a Member.You see I live with my Girlfriend of 8 years. She used to be a Member but was excommunicated because I started living with her back in '99. She is on Social Security. Should we get married she would lose that income.We rely on that income to live. So as you can see we can't get married. The Church would be asking us to live off of a little over 600 dollars a month before tithing for bills and food that equal well over a 1000 dollars a month.Yes I know we are supposed to obey the Church but at this point I question the Church's teachings and wonder why they ask so much from Members. Are you sure you all are not following in blind faith?

My testimony is to you that if you get married, repent, and be baptized (both of you!) that even if you don't have the money to pay your bills, somehow things will work out. If you do everything you can to make ends meet, there will be those who can help. There are church and government programs that can help. I have two children and am in school. I make about $800 a month. Rent is $668. After tithing and bills we have nothing, not even for food. Yet we have everything we need for now. Nothing can compare with the blessing of membership in the church. It's worth more than all the money in the world. If you want to know how it is that we survive, PM me and I can give you some ideas. Whatever you do, don't let money come between you and God.

As I understand Mormon teachings if we continue to live like this we will end up in the middle kingdom in the end and not what you guys call Hell. That's not so bad since I don't have a goal set to reach the highest kingdom as I don't know what the highest kingdom is like so why try attaining it? Second best is good enough. Anything but outer darkness.

Well, while I'm not God and can't judge, D&C 76 says those who are immoral go to hell until the end of the millennium, then they go to the lowest kingdom. You don't want to suffer like that and loose those blessings. Trust me.

15 Therefore I command you to repent—repent, lest I smite you by the rod of my mouth, and by my wrath, and by my anger, and your sufferings be sore—how sore you know not, how exquisite you know not, yea, how hard to bear you know not.

16 For behold, I, God, have suffered these things for all, that they might not suffer if they would repent;

17 But if they would not repent they must suffer even as I;

18 Which suffering caused myself, even God, the greatest of all, to tremble because of pain, and to bleed at every pore, and to suffer both body and spirit—and would that I might not drink the bitter cup, and shrink—

19 Nevertheless, glory be to the Father, and I partook and finished my preparations unto the children of men. (D&C 19:15-19)

[Garden Girl]

Hello kona...

If you want to know what the Lord thinks about your living situation... your relationship... take one of your quads and turn to the Topical Guide and look up "Fornication." Then look up all the relevant scriptures and read what the Lord says... fornication = having sexual relations without being married...

Then turn in the Topical Guide to "Chastity" and read the scriptures pertaining to that... I think you'll have a whole new insight into what the Lord wants from you, member or non-member.

The Garden Girl

Edit to Add: Lest I seem harsh, may I encourage you to really try to find a solution together, and in counsel with the bishop. Also, you state that she is on SS... Is there any type of work that she can do... can she work from home? Does she have skills that she can utilize the computer doing professional typing/transcribing, etc. She could have a small business typing legal documents, business correspondence for small businesses who need secretarial services, etc. There must be something she can do? Does she have talent for making jewelry or handmade greeting cards (I've done both)... Seven gift shops along the coast used to carry the cards I made featuring photography of the Oregon coast, but after my husband died I lost heart because he was my photographer.

Anyway, you get the idea... instead of just saying we can't get married because she'll lose her $600/month, why don't you think of ways she can earn $600 and still draw SS...

[Guest AutumnBreez]

Hello kona...

If you want to know what the Lord thinks about your living situation... your relationship... take one of your quads and turn to the Topical Guide and look up "Fornication." Then look up all the relevant scriptures and read what the Lord says... fornication = having sexual relations without being married...

Then turn in the Topical Guide to "Chastity" and read the scriptures pertaining to that... I think you'll have a whole new insight into what the Lord wants from you, member or non-member.

The Garden Girl

Edit to Add: Lest I seem harsh, may I encourage you to really try to find a solution together, and in counsel with the bishop. Also, you state that she is on SS... Is there any type of work that she can do... can she work from home? Does she have skills that she can utilize the computer doing professional typing/transcribing, etc. She could have a small business typing legal documents, business correspondence for small businesses who need secretarial services, etc. There must be something she can do? Does she have talent for making jewelry or handmade greeting cards (I've done both)... Seven gift shops along the coast used to carry the cards I made featuring photography of the Oregon coast, but after my husband died I lost heart because he was my photographer.

Anyway, you get the idea... instead of just saying we can't get married because she'll lose her $600/month, why don't you think of ways she can earn $600 and still draw SS...

Garden Girl- I am an artist and would love to learn how to get my stuff out there....I can make jewelry, face paint for kids parties, and I think it would be cool to do gift baskets. PM on how and whats if you get this message. My husband would do the photography for me too. How did you start yours???

[Guest AutumnBreez]

Kona,

This portion of life is temporary and short.

What do you want for your future??

What do you want for her future?? AND What does she want for her future??

What do you want together ???

Write down the blessings that are promised to enrich your lives, though following God's commandments today.

What actions have you changed today to bring light to that future?

Stagnant waters breed infestations. Strive for improvement daily.

[kona0197]

I went to Service this last Sunday. I feel a bit better. I will try to find a solution to this problem we are having.

[CourtneyP]

Way to go! :)

[ztodd]

That is wonderful Kona. Keep going. Maybe setting up an appointment to talk with the bishop could help you out.

[emeliza]

There are some scriptures I don't understand and there are some I find disturbing. So I'll let you all know what happens next.

Wait until you read the Old Testament.....talk about scriptures you don't understand and find distrubing.....

Um...sorry for the sidetrack. I would suggest continuing to go. Pray to God (and ask your gf to as well) about whether you should marry or not. That needs to be your first issue if you would ever decide to join the Church.

[LdsNana]

I went to Service this last Sunday. I feel a bit better. I will try to find a solution to this problem we are having.

kona,

Do you have any idea how many people here have been thinking about you and praying for you? You are more than a "post" to all of us here...

Please stay connected to us and let us continue to know how you are feeling, so that we may continue to support you and exercise our faith with yours. I have a testimony that If you will do this, that you will find strength that will assist you in finding the solutions that will enable you to do what they Lord would have you do.

I am so glad that you went to church again. I know that it was exactly the right thing for you to do, and it is the feelings of goodness that we are given, that always confirm the right choices that we make in our lives. This is how our Heavenly Father always speaks to us and how we feel the spirit in our hearts.