RainofGold

When my son was in second grade he came home one day and ask me if Santa was real. He said that some of the kids in his class were saying that he wasn't. He was seven years old, his sister ten. My first respose of course was that he was real. If his friends chose not to believe it didn't mean he wasnt real. My son asked a few more times, with a more serious face. Now he was demanding the truth and with almost tears in his eyes pleaded with me to tell him the truth. My daughter was already upset not wanting to know the answer to the question and mad at his brother for wanting to know. I told my son that we would talk in the afternoon when dad came home, (I wanted back-up) but he wouldn't wait. It tore me up and hurt me to tell him and his sister that Santa wasn't real. That it was us giving them the presents and eating the cookies at night. By now they were both crying, (I tried really hard not to) but was honest with them. My son was sad but relieved that he knew the truth and didn't have to wonder any more^_^. But that wasn't all, now he wanted to know if the bugs bunny, and the:bunny: tooth fairy were real. I told him that they were all make believe. The hardest part was when he ask me if Jesus was real that's when I saw his sad face get even more sad. I apologize to him and his sister, and they both understood. And I also bore my testimony about Heavenly Father and Jesuschrist and told them They both loved them and that of course they were both real. Would I have my kids believe in Santa when they were little? I don't think so....

mlbrowninwa I had a long talk with my husband about our sons' choices and how we need to be in the same page, and he agreed with me. We talked to our son and told him that he couldn't hang out with them at the skate park during the week,but that they were welcome to come to the house. That when he does hang out with them in the weekend we need to know where he is at all times. Today I talked to my bishop about my son, he has been his home teacher companion for the last few months. (which I'm grateful for). So now he knows what is going on in his life, he told me that when he starts seminary this week he'll probably start hanging out with the lds kids again. I'm praying that my son can be a good example to his skateboarder friends and that he can start making different choices now that school started. Thank you for your advice I hope that your son can stay on the right path. I am so glad that your son decided to join the church with you. Rain

Elphaba, I agree with you completely. Lately I've been scrapbooking my kids school, birthday and vacation pictures. And I have to admit that in a lot of the photos I have to guess on the year. The birthday pictures I actually have to count the candles on the cake to figure out what year we are celebrating:o so I think having the numbers on the cake makes it a lot easier . Rain

A few days ago a mom of one of my sons friends came over my house. This friend is part of a group of boys that my son has known for about three years now. The mom of this boy informed me that her son had told her that the "group" of friends that my son has been hanging out with had offered him drugs in more than one occasion. Last semester my son was having some problems in school and we decided to put him in independent study. His grades started to improve and he felt much better at home. I was kind of relived because that meant he wouldn't see this group of skateboards friends that I always had a feeling that were trouble. So basically for the last 7 months he had very limited contact with them. Now that he went back to school all of a sudden this boys are his best friends and he wants to hang out with them . The first thing is to tell my son that those boys aren't a good influence to him because of the drugs that I was told they were doing. My son didn't denied that he knew that they were doing drugs, but he assured me that he has never seen them taking them or that he has never taken them himself. Today he asked me to drop him off at his friends house because he wanted to hang out with this group of friends to go skateboarding around the neighborhoods. Of course I told him no. He than calls my husband at work who tells him he can go with them if he "promises" he wont try any of that stuff. So I go and drop my son at this boys house, upset that my son wont listen to me and mad at my husband for thinking that a promise is all he needs from my son to feel comfortable to let him hang out with this group of boys. I told my husband that I hold him responsible if my son gets in trouble with these boys because he is the one letting him go. He tells me that I should trust my son more that he will do the right thing and that he is smart enough to not do drugs. I am very confused, as a mom I have this feeling that I should not let him hang out this boys outside of school. At the same time I want to show my son that I trust him to choose the right, that I have taught him well and that it's time that I send him out in the world. These boys are not lds. Should I trust and let go or should I listen to this little voice telling me that I should protect my son? Rainofgold

Deadinside, I'm sorry to hear that your wife wants a divorce. A few years ago my husband who is not an active member had an affair. I went to see my bishop and he recommended divorce. He told me that if my husband wasn't helping me and my two children grow closer to HF then he was pulling us down. That I would be better off without him since he wasn't setting a good example to our children. I left his office sad and confused, I went in there for advice and having faith that my bishop would tell me to be forgiving and to work hard to keep my family together. My husband was remorseful, he wanted to stay and work things out, I wanted to "kill" him for all the pain he caused me and I kicked him out of the house. I prayed to my HF and I felt that even though my husband wasn't active in the church and we were not sealed in the temple, my family was still important and he that my husband was a child of god and a good person and father. After a few weeks of counseling and a lot of prayer we got back together. He still not coming to church with me, but he is very supportive of my callings and encourages our children to be active in the youth programs. I will not force him to believe in something and live a lie just to make me happy, because I have gone through that before and it didn't bring true happiness to either of us. We just had our 19th year anniversary, and I have to say that I don't regret staying together. We have to very well adjusted teenagers and overall a happy family. I know many families that are sealed in the temple, they are both active in the church and are miserable at home. Husbands that have callings in the church and treat their wives like dirt and don't respect them. I'm sorry if this was too long but I felt that I just had to share this with you. I wish you and your wife that best. Rain

I am so happy for you. Congratulations!!! I am a convert to the lds church myself and know that feeling of happiness that comes when you come right out of the baptismal waters. All the blessing are just waiting around the corner Rain:p:p

I agree with Vort, I would wait and see what he is willing to do to get you back and not the other way around. He should work hard to make himself worthy of you and your son. I know it might be hard but in my opinion you should put yourself and your son first. I will pray for you and your son. Rain

It's 2:53 am here, I'm not working, I just can't sleep plus I like how quiet is when everyone is sleeping zzzzzzzzzzzzz:D

pam, i feel the same way, when i joined last year i thought this was going to be a like a heaven for us where we could "meet" and chat. But it has been everything but that. I really don't feel the same enthusiasm as i did at the beginning. I find myself visiting less and less. I'm glad that you said it so well for a lot of us that feel the same way... Thanks, rain

Is she going to be taking all of this babies to her 3 bedroom house? And is she having extra help to take care of their feeding, bathing, changing, and holding? I also agree that she might have a mental problem. It reminded me of the Yates mom who drowned her five children. We should all pray that this little angels can receive the attention and love that they deserve.

Hello Emily, So glad you're doing well. Hope you that we are here for you. Last time I checked nobody in this site is perfect, so you'll fit right in. Welcome and I'll keep you in my prayers..:) Rain

my husband has been wanting to open a restaurant for the longest time. He is not a member, he would want to sell alcohol. He doesn't see anything bad with having a beer once in a while. I have never supported the idea even though I know that we would probably make tons of money since he has the skills, knowledge, and connections to do so. I just think that being part of a business that sells alcohol it's a personal choice. Knowing what I know about the consequences of having too many drinks and driving, I would hate to be the person selling it. I would somehow feel a little responsible, even though they could probably go anywhere else and buy it. I just wouldn't want the person to be me. Rain

I read this book when President W. Kimball was our living prophet. I had just been baptized in the church, and read the book several times. I was 16 years old when I read it for the first time and I have to say that this is one of my favorites books. Rain

StallionMcBeastly, this is Rains daughter. thank you so much for the compliments! i would so totally date you if u lived closer! i wish there were more guys like you! im your age so thats lucky right? ps do u have a myspace???

Sakuragirl, I am so happy that you found a job. God listens to our prayers. Keep your head up and your faith in God and everything will work out fine. Big hug, Rain

JHM, I wanted to tell you that I admire your courage, humility, your faith in the Lord and your strong testimony of the church. Knowing who you are and why you are here has brought you back to the church. Heavenly Father loves you unconditionally and He is with you, even when you don't do what is right. You are stronger than you think and just because you had a "weak moment" doesn't make you weak. No one is perfect..... Rain

Bytor, I just noticed that this was your one thousand 666 post. Creepy.. Rain

Ruthiechan, Thanks for that comment. I guess that they want to call it "dancing" but is more like having sex on the dance floor with clothes on. I'm glad that the school decided to change the dance rules after having many parents and teachers complained about it. I'm relieved that most of you think that this is inappropriate. My daughter gets teased a lot in school for being a goody good girl and make fun of her calling her old fashioned and a prude. StallionMcbeastly, I wish we had more young men in our stake that think like you. I showed my daughter your comment and she was happy to see that other lds young men still appreciate girls that behave like her. Thanks again, Rain:p

Wow having 100 high schools students must be nice. Our high school has close to 2,500 students in a city of 160,000 people.

Hi Prospectmom, You are right, you are lucky. Can I ask you what part of the US you live in? I guess in Southern California we are not as lucky

My whole family is addicted to The Office". We look forward to Thursday night every week to sit together with popcorn and enjoy the show. We've all of the seasons on dvd and watch them often. We don't know how to break this addiction....

The dance at school that my daughter decided to go to was homecoming. We thought that the girls where supposed to be dressed more formal. I do regret not complaining to the school because I found out later that some parents, and teachers did complained. Next week is the snow ball in my daughters high school. I am so thankful to the people that did complained because it seemed to make a difference. This is the first time that they are going to have a dress code and dance rules. They are going to be given a warning bracelet. If they are caught freak dancing their bracelet will be removed, if they are caught a second time they are going to call their parents and ask to leave the dance. Is a shame that a lot of the kids in school when they heard that were upset because they said that they don't know any other way of dancing and having fun. Since my daughter is a senior she decided that she will go because this will probably be one of her last dances in high school, other then prom.

Loudmouth, Thank you for all the Kudos....:p My daughter is the Laurel President in the young women, where all of the girls love her and look up to her. She tries to set a good example to them and to live by the church standards. As to some pointers. Having good friends in one of the most important choices we can help our teenagers make. Even though I was not raised lds, I come from a very old fashioned, conservative family. And I try to raised my daughter with the same values since she was very young. Following the church rules has never been hard for her because of how she was brought up. Not dating before the age of 16. Not dating non-members. Dressing modestly, yes even though the rest of the girls are using very short shorts and shirts that are two sizes two small. Only going to church activities, parties and dances. (her choice) Not watching rated R movies. (her own personal choice) Helping her know who she is and having a strong relationship with her Savior. And this one I had nothing to do it, being blessed by my Heavenly Father with a very special daughter. Rain

My daughter who's 17 went to her first school dance a few days ago. When I picked her up from the dance she was very upset, shocked and sadden. Most of the girls were wearing dresses that looked like blouses, they were so short that at times you could see a little bit of their underwear. But the worst was the dancing, my daughter said that she's only seen it on mtv. She could not believe her eyes. It got so bad that she called me almost in tears to go and pick her up, that she didn't feel comfortable there. And even though she went with a group of girls from our ward they were also freak dancing. I guess I'm a little old school because I didn't know what that was all about, so my daughter had to explained to me what it was. Are most of the lds youth doing this dance? 'Freak dancing' is too dirty for school officials, parents By SAM SKOLNIK SEATTLE POST-INTELLIGENCER REPORTER Think of sexually evocative bumping and grinding to bass-heavy hip-hop tunes. Think of lap dancing, standing up. That's "freak dancing," a trend among high schoolers nationwide for more than a half-decade that Seattle Public Schools is now not only taking notice of but trying to stop. Steve Wilson, the Seattle district's chief academic officer, said at a community meeting at Roosevelt High School Tuesday night that the district was setting a new policy after incidents at Roosevelt and other high schools in which parents had written to complain and students had been disciplined for freak dancing. Parents and school administrators have raised concerns that such dancing could lead to sexual activity and shouldn't be allowed at school-sanctioned dances attended by students in their early teens. Wilson encouraged students to continue attending their school dances, but he said those who do must dance "according to what reasonable people would consider appropriate." Such dancing, he said, should not include "lewd," "sexually suggestive" or "sexually simulating" behavior. Wilson said the district already had issued a definition of freak dancing, defining it as occurring when "one dancer bends all the way down" and the other thrusts themselves toward the buttocks of the person bending down. That definition elicited some snickering from the audience. The sometimes-raucous meeting was dominated by a long public comment period. Generational stereotypes typically held, with students mostly favoring allowing freak dancing, and more parents than not expressing concerns. Roosevelt student Julia Pope said she doesn't drink or do drugs, "and I haven't yet contracted an STD through freak dancing." "It's simply outrageous that they can impose their morals on us," Pope said of school officials and parents. One 15-year-old Roosevelt sophomore, Colin Gerhart, said he had been reprimanded at a recent school dance for freak dancing. Afterward, he said, he spoke with his grandmother about it and she told him that she had learned how to dance during high school gym class. Gerhart said that he had no similar schooling and that he freak danced because he had learned it from watching music videos on MTV -- and that's all he knew. "I don't know how you expect us to know how to dance," he said. Several parents said their children had told them they had witnessed such dancing and it made them feel uncomfortable. One parent suggested that freshmen and sophomores dance at separate events from juniors and seniors. Said Michael Capico, the father of a freshman at Roosevelt, "There's a point after which you want to keep the dancing dancing" and any sex separate from it. Seattle is coming to this issue relatively late. The issue swept through high schools nationwide about four to five years ago. Puyallup High School officials caused a storm in 2001 when they banned students from bending over more than 45 degrees while dancing or otherwise simulating sex acts. Some students organized their own private party in a protest that drew more than 300 students from the school's Valentine's Day dance.

Sakuragirl, I will pray for you. I hope that you realize what a blessing it is that this man is out of your life. He has shown you no compassion and has taken advantage of you. Do you have any family members that you can turn to? Try looking for a roommate so you can share the expenses. Many times you can find other members in the church that are looking a room to rent. I'm glad that you are back at church, you'll see that having a family ward you wont feel lonely. Once your visiting teachers and home teacher get involved you are in good hands. Take care, Rain