interalia

Wow! I am moved by all of the positive comments and support I have already received here. I really needed this, to be accepted unconditionally despite my unique challenges. As far as showing compassion, let's just say I have interesting insight into the way both genders get abused by society as a whole and I want to try to change it. I guess you could call me a feminist and a masculinist(?). I love all people and just want to see them meet their potential as children of God and not be weighed down under cultural oppression. For those who wondered, I do deal with SSA in that I know I can love a person of the same sex, however, I've been blessed to recognize that I can also love those of the opposite sex as well - so I have been extraordinarily blessed in that way and have such compassion for those who seem to not be able to do this! I believe I will write out how I gained my testimony now as I'm feeling less inhibited. I'd like others to see why it has been strong enough to stop me from making choices that every fiber of my being says I should make! I'll make the post somewhere appropriate on the site.

Ooohh!! What kind of parrot is that, MsMagnolia?!?! I love birds.

I think you are very close. I wrote this some time ago with regard to this subject and will post it here. ***** In the ongoing debate concerning gay marriage I repeatedly see two different arguments made by those on each side of the issue. However, despite these primary arguments, the issue is really about something deeper. Anti-Gay Marriage - Its About Protecting the Definition of Marriage The primary argument used by those who are against gay marriage is that that allowing gay marriage will redefine marriage. What does redefining marriage mean? According to this argument, marriage is a word that by definition includes only a union between a man and woman. By making this claim they posit that for marriage to be open to allowing same sex couples, then marriage's basic definition will be changed. The argument against this proposes that marriage is only defined as a union between a man and a woman because that is the traditional definition but is by no means complete. Allowing gay marriage would not change the definition but rather expand its definition to include same sex marriages. This idea is evident in Webster's Dictionary which now contains a definition of marriage for both opposite and same sex couples. Pro-Gay Marriage - Its About Civil Rights The primary argument used by those who are for gay marriage revolves around civil rights. The argument is that by not allowing gays the right to marry they are denied various civil rights. Those for gay marriage repeatedly say same sex couples are being denied the right to marry and that by not being allowed to marry, the state or nation where they live will not afford them specific rights given to married individuals. The argument against this is two fold. Firstly by the traditional definition of marriage, all gays have the right to marry – someone of the opposite sex – and thus are not denied any civil rights. This of course uses the traditional definition of marriage and is not how same-sex couples intend their explanation of their loss of their marriage right – they believe they do not have the right to be married to the person they love regardless of their sex. Concerning the loss of state and national rights, those against gay marriage explain that a civil union has all the same rights afforded to it as a marriage (at least in California) and so there is no loss in civil rights between the two definitions. Its Really About Validation These two arguments are just surface issues though. Sure there is some weight given to those who are against marriage's redefinition just as there is weight to those who claim their civil rights are being denied, but that is not the real issue. The real issue is validation of lifestyle. If gay marriage is allowed it validates the gay lifestyle in ways that civil unions do not. Marriage is the traditional form of union and that which is most widely understood and accepted. Having a union that is not defined as a marriage diminishes its value (regardless if there is any real difference in practice at all). Gays have been seeking validation for their lifestyle for decades (if not longer) and having their unions solidified by the traditional word, marriage, would represent a new shift in wide scale acceptance of gay lifestyles. Those who are against gay marriage are against it for the same reason – validation. Most against gay marriage believe it to be fundamentally inappropriate (some say sinful) and not desirous for the population. They have various reasons as to why this is, but in the end, allowing gay marriage would further validate gay lifestyles and legitimize it for this and future generations (promoting more same-sex experimentation and general acceptance among the youth). For those who see this as an issue of moral impurity, validating the gay lifestyle is like endorsing the destruction of society – not an easy thing to ask of anyone who feels strongly about it. There are idiots on both sides of this discussion, and so we need not judge the validity of the others' arguments by the extremists – there are bigots on both sides. But as long as we continue to focus on the more surface issues of marriage redefinition and civil rights, this debate will go on and on with neither side making progress. When we are honest with ourselves however concerning the true issue, it will allow us to move closer to understanding of both sides. Considering the extreme polarizing moral effects of this decision however, we can only assume things will get worse before they get better.

Every single person that either pushed someone in front of them, or rushed into that store that day is responsible. Sure it might not have been their specific push, shove, or feet that killed that man, but then again it may have; regardless, each of those people whose hearts were set on greed did this. I do not blame the store - sure they could have been more organized, but we could always say things "could" have been different - in the end, greed did this.

Preach it! I wouldn't trade my problems for anyone else's really, but being transgendered is no walk in the park. Also being a member of a church with such strict expectations of gender it can make things confusing at times. I have faith things will get worked out in the end, but for the time being, I have to take each day one at a time.

My introduction with a warning - some adult concepts below. I am a convert to the church of 10 years. Before I joined, I had plans to change my sex having never felt right as my birth gender, but during the process of making such a weighty decision, I was introduced to the church and gained a testimony of it. I learned that I had a spiritual gender and certain roles and responsibilities involved with it. I remained faithful and worked to overcome my cross gendered feelings that plagued my life until ultimately they proved to be too much for me. I left the church to continue with the process of transition. Despite my successful transition, I could not forget the testimony I had of the church and the potential greater blessings in store for me if I followed the church 100% even if doing so potentially meant depression and heartache during this life. Also, the thought of one day being married and not being able to be sealed to my spouse or children really bothered me. So in a desperate prayer for direction, Heavenly Father revealed to me that if I returned to the church, the road back would be paved for me. I acted on this faith, returned to the church and my former life, and despite extreme physical changes, over the next year was able to reverse or minimize many of them so much so that I was able to eventually go to the temple and take out my endowments. I realized over the years that my gender issues were not in fact that I needed to change my sex, but that I was incredibly unhappy with the social aspects of my gender, and that if I had changed my sex, I would have dealt with the same issues, but in reverse. I have a very hard time with social gender rules and roles. This, as you can imagine, makes being a member of the church difficult at times considering the church's strong views on sex roles and expectations. I do my best to play the part I'm assigned, but I feel like I'm acting just to get by and not stir up controversy, when in fact at times I'm screaming inside wishing I could be seen as something other than my birth sex. It gets tough being defined by it especially when you don't even think you are it. NOTE: I've intentionally not revealed my sex because I don't want your advice or opinion to change because of whom you are talking to. I chose 'male' on my profile because it is the normative default sex for English language. Well I've gotten a bit too heavily into my issues which I can discuss more later. Suffice it to say for this intro thread, I do have a testimony of this church, of this Gospel, and of Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. I believe that my issues in this life are given to me by God for my betterment and that through faith they can be overcome if it be His will that I do so. I am have come to this forum because I need someone to talk to. I don't feel like I have anyone to talk to in my ward. I feel that talking about things like this to other members in person would only be a bother to them and make them uncomfortable, but I need people in the church to talk to even if my situation is an alien one. I've added a more detailed bio here: http://www.lds.net/forums/introduce-yourself/16148-my-introduction-warning-adult-concepts-concerning-gender-2.html#post293641