LionHeart

A Frenchman, an Englishman, and a New Yorker were captured by a fierce tribe. The chief comes to them and says, "The bad news is that now that we've caught you, we're going to kill you, and then use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how you die." The Frenchman says, "I take ze poison." The chief gives him some poison, the Frenchman says, "Vive la France!" and drinks it down. The Englishman says, "A pistol for me, please." The chief gives him a pistol, he points it at his head, says, "God save the queen!" and shoots himself. The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork." The chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the fork and starts jabbing himself all over --the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. There's blood gushing out all over, it's horrible. The chief is appalled, and screams, "What are you doing???" The New Yorker looks at the chief and says, "So much for your canoe, shmuck!"

Actually, most of the men I have talked to on the issue feel that sex is not the issue; and would play no part in their decision to marry more than one woman. They say that they would not want to have more than one wife because of how stressful it would be. If it was only about the sex, they would just have an affair. This way, they don't go to jail.

Montana Grizzly Bear Notice In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly bear conflicts, the Montana Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers, hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert for bears while in the field. We advise that outdoorsmen wear noisy little bells on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them. We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an encounter with a bear. It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between black bear and grizzly bear dung. Black bear dung is smaller and contains lots of berries and squirrel fur. Grizzly bear dung has little bells in it and smells like pepper.

Actually there were plural marriages performed after the manifesto which were instructed by the president of the Church; however, they were seperate from the Church in order to spare the Church any legal issues that might come from it. Plural marriage was not completely snuffed out among the leadership of the Church until the administration of Heber J. Grant; nearly 20 years after the manifesto. All of them were considered "for time and all eternity". But like Traveler said, they were by way of commandment. And the wives played a big role in choosing other wives. L.H.

Except that person will not be given another chance unless he/she was making good progress in this life. L.H.

I don't know why it doesn't show it. But if I click on the box, it brings up the picture.

If everyone in the family attained to Celestial glory, they would all be in the presence of the Father anyway. So one might ask: "What would be the point in sealing the family together if they are all going to be together anyway?" I believe that one of the purposes for it is so that should one family member make it, and another one does not, the family tie is still there which enables the one who made it to extend a hand to those in his family that didn't make it, and offer them the opportunity of further progress. As far as creating universes, each one would see to their own universe. (your kids wouldn't be allowed to come over and beat up my kids) L.H.

One thing I would like to point out that stands out in my mind as strong evidence of apostasy, is the fact that back in the dark ages, if one wanted to get rid of someone, all that was necessary was to accuse the victim of being a witch. This in itself, was a death sentence. The victim was subjected to extreme torture in an attempt to extract a confession. Finally the victim could no longer take it and would confess a false confession; soon after which, he/she was burned at the stake. But it was the clergy men of the church who were behind the torturing. Compare this with how Jesus, or His apostles would have handled the situation and there is a big contrast. If the accused was posessed, they simply would have cast out the demon; if the accused was not posessed but engaged in sinful practices, "He among you who is without sin, let him cast the first stone." L.H.

And speaking of basketball pictures, here is one I found quite amusing:

Why did the chicken cross the road? - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -To prove to the skunk that it can be done.

Correct.

I saw a sign in a pawn shop once that said: "Shoplifters will be merrily beaten to a bloody pulp."

Hi Dr T. I will give you some thoughts on this according to my understanding. The heavens operate on a patriarchal system. In other words, it's family based. We will always be subject to our Father in Heaven, and likewise He to His Father in Heaven. As far as our siblings go, if one advances to Godhood, we will still worship our same God. The sibling who advanced to Godhood will go off and begin his own family and possibly his own universe; yet he will still be family. Much like when My brother grew up, got married and moved away. Although he started his own family, he is still my brother and I still visit with him. L.H.

Correct Mrs. S. Here's another one: I never was, am always to be, No one ever saw me, nor ever will And yet I am the confidence of all To live and breathe on this terrestrial ball. What am I? L.H.

Only one color, but not one size, Stuck at the bottom, yet easily flies. Present in sun, but not in rain, Doing no harm, and feeling no pain. What is it?

I only shave right after a shower. While I am in the shower, I will wash my face with the shampoo lather. Using this tactic, I really don't even need to use aftershave. But I only shave twice a week. As far as the razor goes, I use the new gilette fusion. That is the best one I have seen so far. With other razors, I had to go over my face again using up strokes the second time to get clean shaven. With the new gillette fusion, I no longer have to do that. But I can tell when it is time to change blades when it starts to pull my hair while I am shaving. But I am cheap so I will usually endure a few shaves like this before I finally decide it's no longer worth it. But I can usually make a blade last for at least three months. I tried a bag of disposables once, and I have never had such terrible razor burn in my life. It might work for some people but I sure didn't have much luck with them. Perhaps it's just because I got the wrong kind. Being as cheap as I am, I probably hunted down the bag for 50 cents at the dollar store. But regardless of what brand I got, I still would have had to go over my face twice. L.H.

A telephone?

Are communion and sacrament the same thing? I am unfamiliar with communion. L.H.

Here you go Paladin Girl.

I will make a new post in that thread so it will be out in the front. As for your question, The thing you must understand about LDS diety is that the Father, the Son (Jesus) and the Holy Ghost are three distinct personages; as opposed to some other beliefs that they are one and the same in a holy trinity. This being said, Jesus is the son of God the Father. Jesus recieved His mortal body when He came to this Earth. God the Father recieved His mortal body on another Earth. That is where He earned His Godhood. Therefore He had a Father in Heaven while on that world and still has a Father in Heaven to this day. Let me know if I can be of more help. L.H.

Does that mean we can become equal to God? God is in a process of eternal progression just as we are. We may get to the point God is at now, but He will always be our Father in Heaven; regardless of how high we get. We will never be His Equal. There was a recent discussion on this topic in a thread called "Temple ordinances & Jesus" Look for that thread in the search engine you will find alot of information on this subject. I hope this helps. L.H.

Hi PaladinGirl. The LDS hold a belief that God the Father was once a man on another Earth and that we too may attain to a state of Godhood providing we live His commandments well enough. It's summed together pretty good in this saying: "As man is, God once was; as God is, man may become." Jesus, the son of God the Father, became mortal when He came to this Earth. He had earned the right to hold His position as Lord over us before he came to this world. L.H.

That's correct. The atomic number of copper is 29.

Nope. Good try though. How did you come up with your answer?

If gold is 79, and silver is 47, then what must copper be?