Aphrodite
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Posts posted by Aphrodite
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Im afraid you can count me out. Ive been to the London temple so many times and I dont have a recommend so...prob would be a lot of effort. The last time I went was for a sealing and me and my hubby and our friends sat outside like the heathen relatives..then we all got changed in to shorts and went to Brighton for the day!!! lol
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My husband and I are in a similar situation-with me being the one doubting. I understand how hard this is for you, but it is also desperately hard for him with all thats going on with his family. Love him, listen to him and support him no matter what he chooses to do. You married him for HIM not the church. He is still that same person.
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Additionally, almost everyone on the list already knows I am an atheist, including Aphrodite. The way you phrased your comment made it sound as if I were consciously taking advantage of the vulnerable Aphrodite to bring he to the "dark side."
Frankly, you've not only insulted me, but Aphrodite as well. She is no wilting flower unable to take care of herself. She is articulate and very assertive. She is fully aware I’m an atheist, and I’m sure she isn’t going to be swayed by me one way or another. So you have no worries about me seeking to weaken anything about Aphrodite!
Elphaba you are right. I was not offended atall, I appreciated the wider perspective.
And I most definitely make my own decisions, based independantly of anything on this board. :)
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Thanks for your kind words. I know worse things have happened but its hard to think about that when ur in crap situation of your own.
Maybe Ill tell Rob to pray for sense or whatever. Unfortunately, I wont be. Yes I can think maybe we would have crashed instead thats why we broke down-but I dont,that is too ridiculous and far fetched to believe. My faith is non-existent at the moment anyway and I havent prayed for....a long long time. After this, Im not going to be starting any time soon.
I understand what you are all saying-prayer is communication with God. Well, I dont have anything to say to hiim at the moment, if he even exists atall. Yesterday has just confirmed to me I need to make my own luck. I guess it just wasnt meant to be yesterday. My in laws said the funeral was weird anyway and they dont feel like they went to one. So we are all going up later to do our own service and so we can visit the grave. So there's light at the end of the tunnel after all :)
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What is even the point of praying? I mean, seriously, whatever is going to happen is going to happen anyway. You can pray for someone who is dying to live-but they will still die. The reason I say this is because we have had a really bad day today. It was Rob's nan's funeral, up north in the Lake District, a good 3 hour drive from our home. We had booked a hotel to stay overnight and were looking forward to having a day to ourselves the next day. About 80 miles into the trip our car broke down. The engine had competely died, we had no choice but to be towed home to Luton-missing the funeral, obviously our whole weekend was ruined, we couldnt get our money back on the hotel-and then the recovery van broke down on the. But the main thing was missing the funeral. we were so gutted we could not pay our last respects. Its been so awful.
What has made it worse, is seeing as it was a long way, Rob had prayed all week that things would go smoothly-he even went to his mums and had a special prayer specifically for the car, that all would go ok. It didnt. Everything Rob specifically prayed for the categorical opposite happened. Rob is angry-he missed his nans funeral!!! We can never get that back. God did not help us. So what was the point of praying for it?? Maybe we should just let things happen. Rob is gutted, he's already said he's not going to church on sunday and his faith has been knocked for 6. If there is a God up there, its like he was playing a nasty trick on us all day.
So what does everyone think? Leave it up to divine intervention or pray to see if that will make a difference?
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The car costs $50 to fill and lasts about 10 days of commuting. A no brainer.
Canuck Im so jealous. If 25 quid lasted me 10 days Id feel my life was complete!!!!!!! Like smiling redhead im in the UK obviously and the cost is hitting me and Rob really hard. Rob is self employed and travels a LOT and can travel up to 150 miles a day or more. If he is going that far we will get through 100 pounds a week on fuel, almost a quarter of our entire income.
Thats 400 pounds a month which is $800 US dollars on petrol. And thats not including my travel either which can be upto 20 pounds a week. Its hurting hard. I bet none of you can beat $800 a month!!!! Needless to say we are considering moving abroad once Im qualified as we are almost struggling to live with just buying food and petrol. Its criminal just how much money we apend just to eat and get around. You Americans dont know how lucky you have it!! The missionaries here are in shock the first few weeks at how expensive everything is. It sucks big time.
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middle aged man recovering from a divorce from an apostate wife
What did your wife do? I only ask as it seems to have marred your perception of women somewhat.
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Try relaxation techniques like visualisation or yoga in the daytime. You can use the visualisation techniques at night to try and help you sleep. Also, exercise regularly if you dont already, as that can help regulate your sleep pattern.
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I dont know how she finds the time to send all those texts! I send a lot but nothing like that! Id be grateful she's not doing anything illegal-its only texting after all. If you want to improve her communication skills maybe you could spend some one-on-one time with her. My Dad used to take me out once a month just me and him for daddy daughter time. he did it to my brother and sister too. And tell her to leave the phone at home.
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Sorry Elgama, I think its a bit sad! I would never inflict it on a child of mine. Its a bit cringeworthy. However, I LOVE Ziva and might consider it for any future kids I have!!! lol
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I would urge you to seek medical advice as soon as possible. Sometimes, voices can be heard if you have been experiencing extreme stress, and it can be solved. But sometimes it could be an indicator of certain mental health issues. Something like one one in 3 of us will experience mental health issues at some point in their life. Go to your GP as soon as you can. In the mean time, try not to worry :)
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My Dad always told me animals have spirits and will go to heaven. makes sense, they are innocents like children. I hope so because I love animals.
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Well, Aphrodite, it is certainly up to you as to what you want to do with your money. Paying tithing really isn't about the money, though; it is about faith. And paying it can really test your faith.
I tend to think of it as a sacred, appreciative offering, while DH tends to think of it as insurance -- "fire insurance", if you will -- and more of an obligation willingly paid.
Even though you feel you didn't receive an outpouring of blessings when you did pay your tithing, and you don't feel that you have missed out on any blessings since you have stopped paying tithing, I hope that you will reconsider your position.
Aside from keeping you from temple worship, and I’m not discounting the seriousness of that:
It’s one aspect of trying to grow spiritually. If you pay tithing, and then decide that you need the money too much, so you stop paying tithing, then that is one less spiritual thing you are doing in your life. What hapens then? Do you increase your scripture reading to make up for it? Do you go visiting teaching twice in the month to make up for it? Do you double your compassionate service to others? The answer is probably, No. And increasing in those other areas won’t make up for it, anyway, because it is a specific commandment with a specific blessing tied to it.
Not paying tithing might lead to not doing other spiritual things - well, I’ll skip reading tonight, because I’m so tired, and after all, I didn’t pay my tithing, and I didn’t get struck by lightning for it. Or, my visiting teachers haven’t come to see me this month, and I’m busy and I’m not going to go see the sisters I’m supposed to visit, either. It is a "slippery slope".
But the opposite is also true, especially if you feel there is not much spiritual left in your life. If you pick one thing of a spiritual nature that you are not doing, and start to do it consistently, even if you do it just because you are "supposed" to do it, you will find that it becomes easier and easier to do, and you will eventually find joy in doing it. And it becomes easier to do the second thing, and the third.
The choices we make help us to either climb the mountain, or roll back down into the valley. Will you think about it? :)
Bless u for that alaska you put things really well. I can tell u Ill think about it, but I am still not going to pay for now. I want to make some sort of donation, but I am reluctant because of the 'emotional blackmail' as I see it to pay. Plus I still have not seen a scripture that says 'unless thou payest tithing you are not permitted to enter the Lord's house'. TBH, Even if it existed, it wouldnt make much difference. I let my temple rec expire, my one from when I got married and I have no plans to go back to the temple. So I have no incentive to pay tithing really. I am not actively involved in church anymore, I was released from my calling, dont read scriptures and rarely pray. I go for my husband's sake really, as I now find church really boring, its a drag to go. I feel just as happy if not better without all the stressing and worrying about whether Im sinning or not. Im now living my life for me and including God in my own way and it feels better than ever. Thanks for ur advice. U gave the perfect church answers :) Ill let u no if anything changes tho.
Then the elder's quorum stepped up and built her a new adobe house, twice the size of the original, and installed electricity and a stone floor in it. The blessings continued to flow to her.
Why couldnt they have done that anyway???? Because she was inactive and didnt pay tithing? So she basically paid for it herself anyway! LOL
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yes I am better off temporally. I saw no blessings from paying tithing, spiritually or otherwise, even when I was all believeing. Those windows of blessings or whatever bypassed me. And if I am to believe I will 'burn' for not paying to belong to the church, then I really am better off out of it. I would be happy to make anonymous donations like in other churches but to keep a track on what Im earning, when Im paying, etc is intrusive.
By the way, I know it says bring tithes and offerings to the storehouse, but where in the scriptures does it say you cant go to the the temple or enter heaven? I honestly dont remember reading that anywhere. Thank you for your post, though.
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We havent paid our tithing for 18 months. Nothing drastic has gone wrong, and we're better off financially :)
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If you cant work due to health issues have you looked into government support you might be entitled to? I dont know where you live but in the UK if you fall below a certain level of income you can be housed and supported by the council especially if you cant work due to health.
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And you heard this where? I have been in the church a very long time and NOT ONCE have I ever heard out of the prophets mouth that Polygamy was a Celestial right nor was it ok when Joseph Smith did it. Wish I could find the reference to that right now. I'll repost when i find it. He was chastised by God for it and it was abolished by God in the times of Moses...read Exodus... Nowhere in any of the other scriptures was it approved and reinstated. Some did it anyway but it was not ok in Gods eyes. I HAVE heard that there may be plural marriage in heaven but since none of us are there its a crap shoot as to whether that will be the case or not. I'd hate to hedge a bet on it since we don't know everything about earth life yet. The Church has stated officially that they do not support Polygamy in any form. A sect of "reformed" LDS people in Montana?Utah? believe in Polygamy and they spun off from the saints because they felt that this was a prime part of the faith. They are few and the Church does not support that belief... any more than they support gay marriage or abortion.
The law of Consecration is already in effect in as much as you are supposed to give of your time talents and abilities to God for the benefit of the building of Zion. However, its impossible to do it in its completeness because the church is not doing it to its full potential yet and the world would not tolerate it because people are still too stuck on "stuff". Its just not time for that to happen. It will though before the second coming as revelations talk of times getting so tough that it will take the law of consecration for the saints to survive in the collapse of society.
If you have never heard this then Im not surprised. The church does not tend to broadcast it as its contraversial. Both Brigham Young and Joseph Smith had several wives and stated it was the highest order needed for the celestial kingdom. The only reason it was abolished is becasue it became illegal and we have to follow the laws of the land. According to church doctrine, it will be practised in the celestial kingdom. It is difficult to accept.
People here talk about women being sealed to men-what happens if there are more men than women??? According to the church women cant be sealed to more than one man and u have to be married to go to the celestial kingdom. So what happens to them???
Its actually depressing to think about death from the LDS point of view. If you make it to the top, you will have to share your husband and presumably be 'pregnant' in heaven. If you dont make it, you wont be with your beloved. So its either share him with someone else, or dont have him atall.
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the_Jason, when people question their faith as I have, and discover things about the church that have been hidden from them, people tend to feel upset, angry and betrayed. So the tone of the posts can come across as bashing. The truth is they are probably really confused and emotional after discovering what they have and come here to get answers. It can be frustrating when they get told they are the problem, or whatever. Just as you feel some people can come across as antagonistic so can you as self-righteous :)
I came here in the first place to get answers about my problems with the temple. For some people it's not an option to pray or talk to their bishop or families, as that would mean being disowned/stigmatised or whatever. This is the only place some people can come to question and get answers.
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My Aunt isn't active so it was no surprise that they wanted to have an abortion.
um..Isn't that extremely judgemental? Just because you're not a member does not mean you automatically agree with abortion. Most of the non members I know do not agree with abortion.
I feel for this girl. She obviously has a very rough life and I would not want to be in her shoes for anything. I think she is extremely lucky to have friend like funky fool who wants to support her. I understand peoples strong opinions on abortion but I think some of the self-righteous attitudes that go along with it are disgusting. I dont drink, but I go to bars. Thats not saying I agree with drinking. Applying that logic would mean you never set foot outside your house incase you saw/heard something that was contrary to what you believe.
I believe funky fool is being an amazing friend to this girl. She has clearly explained her thoughts and feelings on abortion, yet she is still wiilling to support her friend's autonomy, rights ands choices even if they differ from her own. Going with her is not supporting abortion, it is supporting her friend in her time of need. Friendship is not, 'I'll support you so long as you do the things I believe in, if not, goodbye' You are there for the best and worst of times.
I have had to nurse a few people who have had abortions. It will affect them for the rest of their lives. I also have a Mother who gave away a baby at 16 years of age. It has devastated her life and had a profound affect on her personality, behaviours, relationships and coping mechanisms. It is not an easy option to give up a baby, it is a devastating life changing decision as is abortion. She will be affected no matter what. I think the whole 'give up your baby and everthing will be ok' mantra is false. In my experience, giving away a baby is more devastating than abortion. Im not pro or anti abortion. It depends on the individual and the situation. Im pro-choice.
I really feel for her.
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Things that "feel good" are rarely good.
Hmm so in that case only things that feel bad are right. The spirit is supposed to feel good. So the spirit's not good?
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I agree with 'Bill'. The WOW is a personal thing and should be interpreted by the individual. If ou feel its ok to drink coffee-go ahead. It is personal feeling and choice.
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I take issue with the same thing, you are not alone. I have been doing major research lately, and my opinion of the church history I was taught while growing up has changed. I wasn't told the truth by many of my leaders/teachers. If you go to the LDS' family website you will see that Joseph was married and sealed to women who were already married to living men.
"If it was in direct contradiction to what God has told us so why would anyone believe ANYTHING he said?"
I wish I had the answer for that, because my testimony has certainly vanished since doing research... I feel lied to.
Me too mountain Girl. I feel very cheated knowing that what we are taught at church is a very glossed-over version of the entire church belief system. Where do you stand with the church now if you dont mind my asking? I too feel my testimony has been destroyed and I am having some real problems with church as a whole, as I dont know what to believe anymore.
You mention not being told the truth while growing up...what did they say that was untruthful, if I may so ask? Did they say he only had one wife? Or perhaps meant he was only intimate with one wife? Or what? I'm just curious. :)
So, ommitting information and picking and choosing what is taught is not a deception of sorts? I was always taught that NOT saying anything that is relevant was lying as well as telling an outright lie. A teacher may not have said, 'Joseph had only one wife', but what they do say is, 'Joseph's wife (singular) Emma.' which leads you to believe it is his only wife.
Imagine if you had a few wives, yet to your work colleagues you refer to 'my wife' this and 'me and my wife that'. When your work colleagues find out you have several, they would probably say-'But I thought you only had one wife?' They would be confused and feel deceived. Hence how Moutain girl and I feel.
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I really do think it's a terrible shame that more mothers do not stay home to look after their children. I have done/do.
I never said anything about not staying at home with your children. Its exactly what Elphaba said-It was the lack of choices she gave women with that talk. What is wrong with having a career?? I know plenty of women who work with the children. I will more than likely work part time when/if I have children. That way everyone is fulfilled and happy. The children get me to look after them, I am fulfilled with a rewarding career, we can afford to put a roof over our heads-everyone wins. How is this wrong????
I suspect that the people who are most vociferous in condemnation of Sister Beck are the ones who don't want to face up to their own shortcomings.
Thats a typical response to people who question or disagree-'there must be something wrong with them'. So, explain to me willow, how working part time as a nurse, bringing up your children, and doing the best by your family is a shortcoming?
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It annoyed me. The sentiment was good in a way, but to me she came across as saying you can only be fulfilled as a woman as a wife and mother. For those who are not married or mothers and want to be, this is very insensitive. Being a wife and Mother is not the only way a woman can be fulfilled. I am only going on this from memory, so I cant remember specifically what she said but I remember thinking it was the usual, 'stay home and reproduce' talk just dressed up a bit.
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lol elgama!!! Either temple is a trek-Preston is what, 200 miles away? And London is still a hefty trek down the M25. Plus hubby has the car during the day, and I cant take time off my course. So unless it fell on a day off and I fancied walking (haha) or forking out loads of cash for the train....It would be nice to meet you all tho. xx