omegaseamaster75

Serving a mission is a priesthood DUTY not a commandment. We are counseled that we SHOULD serve a mission but everyone's life takes a different course and for some the decision to not serve a mission may be the correct one. There are no consequences for not serving because you have not disobeyed.

A minimum wage job does not pay for basic needs. If you make say 10.00/hr that's $20,800.00 per year (gross). Please explain how to be self sufficient on that wage.

Lets not be naive Russell Nelson of the 12 who has been mentioned here earlier was the president of the society for vascular surgery, the director of the american board of thoracic surgery, chairman of the council on cardiovascular surgery for the AHA and president of the Utah state medical association. This does not include his personal history as a practicing physician. I have not been to his home, but i think it is safe to assume that he lives a life style in terms of clothing, furniture, household goods, vacations that many of us can only dream of. Some on this forum might call it excessive What qualifies as excessive? This is not for us to decide. I'll name the 70. Elder Craig C Christensen, who is in the presidency of the 70.

I hate using personal examples because everyone's experience is different, but my mission president was a very young man when he was called to serve 41 yo with a young family. I had the blessing to serve with him in the offices of the mission and we came to know each other very well, I asked him how he became a mission president, and how he could afford to do it at such a young age. We had many great discussions about life in general. Long story short he married young and knew he had to provide better for his small family, they lived on a very tight budget. He saved half yup half of every paycheck. In a couple of years he purchased a small business, he saved half of his income from that and purchased another one, with in a short period of time he owned multiple businesses and became a very wealthy man. This was premeditated and planned he wanted to live more than comfortably. He was friends with CEO's of major corporations. While on my mission we took a P day and played golf at a very exclusive club in Mexico. He told me he spent 125k on a membership in the states recently (this was 20 years ago now). The watch he wore cost as much as many peoples vehicles. He is now a member of the 70 Wealth and influence did not fall into his lap he chose it.

I think that what is not being discussed is the cultural pressure that the OP feels to get married. He is 25 about to go on a mission and is concerned that at age 27 he will be to old to find a worthy spouse. This cultural pressure is what causes young people who are wholly unprepared for marriage and having kids to take the plunge. TFP said correctly that claiming faith, on the other hand, and then proceeding to ignore the counsel given by the church to be self-sufficient, gain an education, stay out of debt, etc., is no faith at all. However this is not what happens. I went to what was once Ricks college and the perception that they can get married and somehow everything will work out was pervasive then and is now. ​The simple fact that the divorce rate in the church approaches the national average says it all. Whatever we are doing is not working

I would disagree, wealth true wealth is a conscious decision at some point it was a priority. It had to be.

Self sufficiency is one of our core beliefs, the pursuit of wealth and influence it's a result of chosen professions, personality types and efforts put forth. Some people chose to enter a profession in which they will have no real "wealth" from a monetary stand point and there are also various measures of wealth. In short no it is not unrighteousness if your desires are pure. Look at the quorum of the 70, the 12 and the first presidency many of them are very wealthy and are men of influence and power

This type of individual goes beyond the scope of what a home/visiting teacher can provide, at least that's my interpretation of it

President Harold B. Lee “I am not trying to urge you younger men to marry too early. I think therein is one of the hazards of today’s living. We don’t want a young man to think of marriage until he is able to take care of a family, to have an institution of his own, to be independent. He must make sure that he has found the girl of his choice, they have gone together long enough that they know each other, and that they know each other’s faults and they still love each other. Quote “When full-time missionaries return home, they should be counseled concerning such matters as continuing their education or employment, strengthening family relationships, participating actively in the Church, paying tithes and offerings, and preparing for temple marriage. It is unwise, however, to ‘recommend that missionaries be married within a specific time. The decision to marry is so important that it should be made only after the most prayerful and careful consideration by the individual.’ (Mission President’s Handbook [31153], 1990, p. 23)” (Bulletin, 1993, no. 1, 2). https://www.lds.org/...ection?lang=eng This was posted earlier ....Harold B Lee thinks that you should not be married as a man until you can care for a family and be independent. Sounds like I'm not to far off from the counsel of the church leaders as other have thought.

Since you are asking me, I think that that bishops responsibility is very limited. As Bishop he has no obligation to give said person a ride. If he wants to be a nice guy this person can ask him as a favor but there is no obligation. The Bishop is a spiritual adviser not a taxi service. There is no "team" unless various members of the ward want to contribute and pull together for this member the bishop may be key in organizing this. Lets keep in mind that no one is bishop forever. This individual and their family have an obligation to provide a lasting solution to the problems present

This is the families obligation, the church should be a final and last resort safety net, not an organization that provides perpetual care or financial support.

Just ask him, he will likely lie about it as stated earlier the exposure to porn is very high, very, very high. As others have said you don't want to lower your standards but keep in mind if you are looking for the guy who has never been exposed it's going to be a tough thing. Also remember that exposure does not equal addiction, the direction that is given to bishops on the matter is very clear on this. Addiction follows a pattern of behaviors. I am not an expert on addiction I am sure others will be more qualified than I am to speak on the subject. PG-13 and R rated movies have also been mentioned, everyone has their own tolerance level for the type of sexual scenes and nudity that are now acceptable in our society. If you have not decided what is acceptable to you now is the time to do so. A frank and open non judgmental conversation need to be had with anyone you are dating seriously not just about this subject but many others.

I know that in my stake the movement is towards every eligible person serving a mission there has been a big push by our stake president in this. Thomas S. Monson has said that serving a mission is a priesthood duty and I agree with this, however it will be interesting to see if that dynamic changes going forward.

The church has never said one way or the other to wait or not to wait until you finish school. They say do not delay, but they are ambiguous in their statements because they understand that everyone has to do what is right for them. Some how in your reading of the talks you think we are counseled to marry while in school we are not. I agree marriage is a priority, I also agree if the right person is found marriage should not be delayed. This is the council of our leaders. Would you not also agree that the Church counsels us to be self sufficient? President Thomas S. Monson has taught that self-reliance—“the ability, commitment, and effort to provide the necessities of life for self and family” 1—is an essential element of our temporal and spiritual well-being. A mere desire to become self-reliant is not enough. We must make a conscious, active effort to provide for our own needs and those of our families. Elder Robert D. Hales of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles says, “Only when we are self-reliant can we truly emulate the Savior in serving and blessing others.” 4 Self-reliance involves several facets of a balanced life, including (1) education, (2) health, (3) employment, (4) family home production and storage, (5) family finances, and (6) spiritual strength. Please explain how getting married without a real job, no means to support a family, having kids while in school, incurring crippling student loan debt, having no real medical insurance is in line with the counsel of our leaders to be self sufficient? Are we not taught by our leaders to have goals in our lives even eternal goals. Elder Ballard said: Develop the Skill of Setting Worthy GoalsI believe you can train yourself to become a positive thinker, but you must cultivate a desire to develop the skill of setting personal worthy and realistic goals. I suppose that at about every seminar or fireside you go to at your age someone talks to you about goal setting. Maybe some of you get weary of listening to the principle of setting goals. But let me tell you something about goal setting. I am so thoroughly convinced that if we don’t set goals in our life and learn how to master the technique of living to reach our goals, we can reach a ripe old age and look back on our life only to see that we reached but a small part of our full potential. When one learns to master the principle of setting a goal, he will then be able to make a great difference in the results he attains in this life. Shouldn't we have goals in our life? Temple marriage being one of them? Being able to provide well for our families being another? Having a "real" job is a worthy goal and makes doing the other things we are commanded to do easier.

The mission prepares you for life male or female on this we can all agree. I personally think any eligible female should go on a mission and with the lowering of the eligible age for woman I think that we will see a shift in the counsel from our first presidency that our youth are given very soon.

Male or female makes no difference. Mission first the experiences you have will prepare you for life.

I could do my own research but I can count on you to look up an obscure talk, or take a scripture out of context just like you are taking Thomas Monsons talk out of context. I do not see any time frame mentioned in his talk at all. He does not say get married in college nor does he say get married within any time frame after your mission. He talks of financial struggle but make no mention that this is a requirement for a happy marriageI would say the council of the church and our prophet is to marry a worthy woman in the temple, at a time that is appropriate to you, with thoughtful prayer and faithful preparation. You also seem unable to resist the temptation to challange an opinion that does not Line up directly with your interpretation of what the exact teachings of the church are.

There is an exception to every rule, this is one example of how things can be managed how many of his fellow graduate were up to their eyeballs? There is an exception for every thing and everyone's experience is different. If we only look at the facts not the exceptions lets see where we land

Yeah, I stopped after I read the date...1973 that's relevant. Just kidding I read it Good talk though, he gives relevant statistics for the era, I wonder how some of those numbers translate to our current day and age. A relevant passage for the OP: Do Not Postpone Marriage and Children But, of course, marriage cannot wait for that. We shall marry, have our families, teach and train them, while we are learning these other things and building toward our creatorship. Marriage should come when we are reasonably young, to procreate and bear children, to have the patience to teach and train them and to grow up with them. Hence, marriage is a must, an early must. Of course, we would decry child marriages, but when young people are in their upper years of collegiate work surely it is time to plan this important life’s work. Missionaries should begin to think marriage—when they return from their missions, to begin to get acquainted with many young women so that they will have a better basis for selection of a life’s companion. And when the time comes they should marry in the holy temple and have their families, and complete their education, and establish themselves in a profitable and rewarding occupation, and give themselves to their families, the gospel, and the Church. Yeah I don't see any time frames in this talk...sure don't delay, "reasonably young" very subjective more so for a male, he says begin planning in your UPPER collegiate work. Bottom line the context in this talk does not apply to our modern era, when this talk was given you could work during the summer and pay for your years worth of schooling. May homes only had one income, the entry level degree was a bachlors, now anything less than a masters and things are more difficult. More education = more debt. Even with the reduced cost of the LDS schools many/most student take student loans.

This is not going to go well for me I can already tell I am not saying they are the only paths, of course there are other options. We all incur debt during our lives but why make life more difficult if you can avoid it? As a medical student when the OP graduates he will be able to afford that debt (student loans), everyone's circumstance will be different. There are may things that can lead to an unhappy marriage, if given the choice wouldn't you prefer to remove a few road blocks before getting married? Also can someone please quote me were a GA says to get married while in school? or as soon as possible after your mission.

They may as well say it do mission(this is something you should do) + get married before you graduate and have a real job + have more kids than you can afford= Debt & poor relationship with your wife or do mission + graduate + get real job= Wife of your choosing, and easier start to life

In my opinion, and this in only my opinion you are better served finishing school, getting a job and then getting married. I am sure I will be quoted some talk given by GA that says you should get married, have kids, go into debt, and have a poor relationship with your wife due to the outside pulls of married life and stress from school. This is not a path you have to choose.

There is only one way to start and that is by asking someone out. DO NOT be in a hurry to get married, date go on a mission...FINISH SCHOOL...then get married

I like to count the "ums"

LDS.org will be able to provide you with the information on the closest meeting house to your location. As far as tithing is concerned make a decision to be a full tithe payer from this day forward, no need to pay back tithing. Go now talk to your bishop, get your feet wet so to speak and it will be a smoother transition when you move.