Junior

Yeah if I decide to stay with her after the baby is born then I hope she will let me take the child to church and she will come too, to help me care for them. I don't think she will though. I want to get a good balance of keeping up my church commitments as well as nog neglecting her or the baby, so it will be easy to achieve that if they come with me, if they don't then it will be tough for me to do both

I could only find a manufacturer date on the seat I was given so I'm going to buy a new one to make sure the baby is safe.

I have tried to before but she doesn't like the church in general, because she thinks it is a bit crazy. She also doesn't like me being part of the church because she thinks that I prioritise the church over her, which I have been trying to do but she gets so upset about it. I did try to reassure her before by telling her besides church commitments and my relationship with God her and the baby are my priority but she didn't like that either. I don't know if there is a way that I can reassure her.

No I'm not okay with it, it makes me sad because practicing my religion is a big part of my life and it makes me sad that I can't share it with my girlfriend and that I will only have limited opportunities to share it with my child.

Yes I can pray for the child as much as I want to It is just that she doesn't like it when I practice my religion around her because it bothers her. So I will have to pray on my own and bless the baby away from her.

Yeah I love that she thinks of all the things that can go wrong because it means we can prevent the baby being harmed. I just want her to not be in a constant state of nervousness because that isn't healthy for her. I am going to pray and bless my child as much as my girlfriend will let me

@Alia Thank you for the advice. Yes I am I think my girlfriend has really good maternal instincts so I think she will be fine mostly. I do want to help her stop worrying about things though because constantly worrying may detract from the joy she should have about becoming a mother.

Yes she is just not an easy person to reason with but I am going to try and show her the necessity to save money is more important than having expensive items.

Yes I am going to be there for the baby all the time, I will even sleep in my car outside my girlfriend's house (because my Bishop doesn't want me to live with her) so I can help her at night. We don't need to give the baby away because we are capable of caring for the baby. Giving the baby away is wrong because the baby is our responsibility and to pass that to someone else isn't right.

I know that I am young but I will be 20 next month and I know a few people who had children at 20. My mom had my older brother when she was 20. We have money, we're not rich but it's not like we are living in poverty. I live with my mother she isn't absent. It's true that I don't have a relationship with my dad but that isn't my fault. That is true but only because his guidance is to get married. My mom will support me as well as she can. We are a bit naive but that is because we never had a baby before, but I am sure she is going to be a good mother. She is very caring.

Yes I know it is more for my girlfriend to feel good about getting nice things for the baby than for the baby. It makes me feel good too, that I can buy the baby nice things but $800 is probably a bit much for me to spend on a stroller. I though $1000 would be enough to get everything for the baby.

Yes but because the baby is going to be born in the USA I want to provide for them to the common standard in the USA, which I would say includes purchasing a stroller and other luxuries. I don't think everything has to be new or super expensive though.

Also my mom is NOT Hispanic!! She is from Tonga and I am from New Zealand.

Obviously, I am going to listen to her about somethings. If she tells me I am holding the baby wrong then I will listen and other things like that. I am sure I will leave the baby with my mom sometimes too, I trust her to look after the baby. All I meant was for somethings we have widely different views and she doesn't always understand the pressure of having a baby in the USA.

I am sorry if I offended you. I don't think my mom is ignorant at all she is my queen. Also, I wasn't offending immigrants to the USA I myself am an immigrant.

No I'm not being racist it isn't about race I am the same race as my mom (the baby will be a different race to me), but we have a different culture. I'm very western but my mom isn't so we don't have the same outlook. I can't take her advice on what to buy for the baby because when I was born she could make do with barely anything, but my girlfriend and I want to give the baby more. Also, I am not Hispanic and neither is my girlfriend.

I will tell her you said she is wise but you have to understand my mother has a very different culture to me and my girlfriend. Her advice isn't relevant to my situation.

Yes I will try to convince her but I don't think I will be successful.

My mom would just use a piece of material with a traditional Polynesian Pattern probably cut from old curtains 😂I think a sling is helpful but there are benefits to some storllers if the baby can sleep in the stroller too.

No my girlfriend does want to be a family but she can't force me to marry her, she can convince me to buy the baby expensive things kind of.

If only that were true I wouldn't be about to become a father when I am so unprepared. Yeah I think she is being irrational about wanting all new things and all the best things but she wants to give the baby the best things possible. She wants the baby to be as safe as possible and as comfortable as possible and I agree with her, but I don't think it is wise to spend lots of money on things and have no money saved for emergencies. I'm not a people-pleaser if I was then I would have married her. I am only trying to do the right thing by providing things for the baby.

I just let her be in charge because she knows what she is doing and I am clueless. I do want to make more decisions or at least make them together but I don't have lots of time to read up on everything.

Why can't we share the car seat and stroller, we won't need them at the same time. We can just transfer them between our houses. I don't think the baby can stay over night with me until after my girlfriend stops feeding them so if we need 2 cribs it won't be for 6 months.

I don't want to spend that much money on a stroller not because I am cheap but I need to save some money for emergencies when the baby is born. But my girlfriend thinks it is important that the baby has the best things so I will probably end up buying it for that ridiculous amount of money.

Yes there are lots of helpful people at my ward but it is mostly women who are helping me. They are helping me a lot but my girlfriend wont come with me to church. My bishop is still fighting with me, otherwise I would ask him.