NeuroTypical

Hi momof7-2nheaven, I hear you. I married a lady who earned her PTSD the hard way too, and fought hard to gain back a good life too. She also struggles to not get offended at the dumb things said by people who have no clue about the sources of misery this life has to offer. Here's something that may help you a bit: Myths about Mental Illness The next time you run into one of these hurtful clueless people, have them read this talk. I don't know what it's like, but I'm aware that folks in your situation often struggle very hard to feel God's love. Do you know what my wife finds fulfilling? She occasionally runs into a kid who is heading towards where she used to be (or is already there). Sometimes these kids are the children of the clueless church people. She's able to give them useful, meaningful, practical advice from the perspective of someone who used to be there. It's not always sucessful - but when she can help turn the path of one out of ten kids, she counts it a win. Maybe you want to consider something like this: Get down on your knees, and say something like this. "God, I'm not exactly sure if you really exist or not. It makes no sense why you'd make me suffer like I have. If you have a purpose for me, please show it to me. I will help to the best of my abilities." If this is something you could get behind 110%, well, I've seen miracles happen.

Most LDS folks won't have seen it, because we tend to avoid productions that mock sacred things.

As someone who occasionally carries around firearms, I am appalled that this guy left a loaded and charged gun lying around with the safety off. He should have known better, and he's lucky he didn't get himself or someone else killed. Even if he was in a canoe in the middle of nowhere, you don't do that. Shame on him. (As just a guy reading the news, however, yeah, it's pretty dang funny.)

You keep saying like her past is in her past, as if you can make it true by saying it enough. Her past is part of who she is - and you are setting your marriage up for a lifetime of grief if you can't get past this. Either she'll grow bitter and dissolusioned with your unwillingness to deal with reality, or you'll hear things you didn't want to hear and figure out the 'real her' is a different person than you thought you had. It is possible her past will show up in various ways and demand attention after you are married. You need to hear what she has to say. Here's a suggestion - give her an long evening or two to get all of her past out into the open and off her back. You sit there and just put up with your discomfort, and hear everything she has to say. Did she have a child or an abortion? Does she have an STD? Is there abuse in her past? Is she a recovering alcoholic? Did she do something illegal that could come back to bite you both? Does she have a jealous ex who gets out of prison in 5 years and will want revenge? Did she rack up unpaid debts? Did she declare bankrupcy? Is there a price on her head in Kentucky? No really - hear what she has to say. If you can't deal with uncomfortable truths about her past, you shouldn't be marrying her. It's one thing to be engaged to someone who says "I did some dumb stuff in the past, but I'm over it." It's something else to be engaged to someone who says "I did some dumb stuff, and I think you need to hear about it before you marry me." If you don't trust her opinion about this, maybe she's not mature enough to get married.

I've seen lots of answers to this question - and it's asked quite often. Basically, it has absolutely nothing to do with worthiness or ability. Women are not lesser than men in any sense at all. The answer that made the most sense to me, is that Priesthood is all about serving others. There is no such thing as a priesthood holder laying his hands on his own head and giving himself a blessing, or ordaining himself to an office, etc. If it does not bless someone other than the person doing it, then it isn't a priesthood function. Women tend to have vast natural capacities to bless others in a multitude of ways. Men tend to need guidance, direction, authority, and process. We're natural abusers of power, so the formal organization of ordaining and office-assuming and whatnot helps keep us on track. If that answer doesn't really float your boat, there are plenty others. A quick search of LDS.org gives us: Women and the Priesthood Blessings of the Priesthood for All: An Inseparable Connection with the Priesthood

Ah! I think I finally understand you now. You thought that converting to Mormonism because of a girl, would be like converting from one flavor of mainstream Christianity to another. Yeah, whenever I hear someone saying "I wanna marry a Mormon", I ask them to take a step back and think. Becoming LDS just because you're dating one, can be a pretty bad decision. Being mormon is more than going to a church - it's a lifestyle and a set of covenants that set you apart from nonmormons. Good for you - I ask folks in your situation to carefully consider exactly that. Kids are not supposed to be pawns in battles over who has the better faith. You too doss!

No, but that's not the only option. I don't deny you the validity of your experience. That doesn't mean the truth claims of my church are false. Again, that's not the only option. Professor Daniel Peterson, who teaches Islamic studies and Arabic at BYU, talks about how he can see some evidence of divine inspiration in the Quran. No argument here. It does seem like you're just assuming that nobody here has followed this advice. On the contrary, many of the people here (myself included) have become LDS precicely because they did follow that advice.

And exactly how do you and your friends "know" this?

From what you describe, you've gotten yourself into a relationship with a guy who has screwed around with girls in the past, and is now doing it with you too.I think you're answering your own question here.

Not all Gadiantons are shadowy puppet masters or even work in govt. A handful of families in just about every LDS ward in America has some gadiantons living with them, in the form of teenagers who are in gangs. They don't get as much press amongst secret-combination-minded folks, as their heinous acts usually revolve around minor crimes of drugs, sex, vandalism, burglary, with the occasional felony thrown in. Not exactly ushering-in-the-millenium type stuff, just stuff that wrecks their souls and sets them at odds with God's plan.

Oh - so you've changed your answer about sustaining your Bishop then?Because again - a question they ask in the temple recommend interview: "Do you sustain the other General Authorities and local authorities of the Church?" And again, it seems like your answer is "No, I don't sustain my bishop. He's wrong, I'm right, and he won't listen, and I will NOT be accused, etc, etc." Again, I wish you well.

I've been paying tithing since 1996 - in 5 different wards in 2 states - to 9 or more different bishops. I've changed positions on the 'gross vs. net' debate at least once. Tithing settlement has always amounted to basically the same thing: "Bro. LM, are you a full tithe payer?" "Yes." "Glad to hear it." I've been Executive Seceretary and attended Bishopric meetings. I've watched a Bishop get trained, and the training he shared with us is "the scriptures say a tenth of one's increase, and only the member can work out with God what that means". To answer cneve's question that he keeps asking over and over again: If a Bishop thinks someone is lying to him, he may ask further questions, or he may let it slide. The member's relationship to the Bishop is less important than the member's relationship to God.

Well, after looking at 'most men', I'd have to say that's a good thing. From what they tell me, most men would make a pretty bad fit for someone trying to live a good life - with or without a child. Pick any group of unmarried men in the church - you'll see a lot of immaturity, fear of commitment, dinking around online instead of establishing a career, etc. A good fit for you would seem to be a guy who is mature (or at least quickly maturing), and looking to take a very important and very permanent role in your lives. Guys moving in and out of mom's life wreak havoc on little kids - they start having problems forming deep relationships and bonding - it hurts a kid too much when a father figure just stops coming by - the kid figures it's his/her fault somehow. Yeah, so when you encounter one of the 'many' - you'll find someone who isn't really equipped to look past your past. I'd be looking for one of the few - someone who understands baggage and regret, someone who gets that people can make mistakes but put them behind her and will still try for a good life. There aren't many guys like that out there - but they do exist.

"Do you sustain the other General Authorities and local authorities of the Church?" I see you justifying your "no". I mean, that's ok - answering honestly is great. Best of luck to you.

So, a temple recommend interview involves answering some questions. Here are a few questions: "Do you sustain the other General Authorities and local authorities of the Church?" It sounds to me like you may have some problems sustaining your Bishop, therefore could not answer "yes", therefore are not worthy for a temple recommend.Another question: "Have there been any sins or misdeeds in your life that should have been resolved with priesthood authorities but have not been?" It sounds like the Bishop thinks there are some unresolved things going on, and it sounds like he may have some misgivings about your worthiness to enter the temple.I'm thinking going over his head to the Stake, isn't bringing you any closer to your endowments...

I think I'll stick with the guidance we've been given on the subject: If I took issue with my wife for fulfilling her divine responsibilities away from the home (as she often does), I would be in the wrong.

So, something I'm confused about.From your standpoint: First, there was nothing - then, there was the heavens and the earth all fully formed through God's power? Do I have that correct? Because the Big Bang theory says nothing about how the earth was formed. It's been a while since my astronomy and earth sciences college classes, but the planetary formation theories they taught me, all involved a bunch of pre-existing matter all being there, and then slowly accreting into a ring, and then further accreting into a planetary body. As a faithful LDS guy, the Big Bang theory and planetary formation science fits nicely into my faith's creation stories. Where's the problem?

Where does Islam make the same claims?I hear this all the time, about how everybody and their dog all promise the same spiritual confirmations that my faith promises. I never hear this from an actual adherent of those religions. From what I've been able to gather, no, Islam does NOT promise to provide spiritual confirmation of the reality/divinity/goodness of Allah. From what I can tell, when you're a Muslim, you basically read the Quran and do what it says and that's that. You don't pray to get answers, you pray because it's one of the 5 pillars.

Well, it seems like you've made up your mind then. Good luck with your military goals - I sincerely wish you the best. The military has ways of surfacing issues like this - here's hoping you come out on the other end, more able to control this stuff.

Being a "good" something usually involves a choice and a measure of effort. If someone finds it easier to make that choice and put forth that effort, maybe a more appropriate word than 'good' would be 'natural' or 'instinctive'. We can often be a good [whatever], even though we might not be a natural or instinctive [whatever]. When it comes to parenting, it's our duty to be a good parents, even if it's hard.

So, feeling this way every now and then is normal. Feeling this way to the extent you describe, where it's impacting your life and the people in it, yeah, that is not normal. There's something wrong with your ability to process and react to the dumb stuff people say. I second the advice - go talk to a professional. I'm just guessing here, but it seems like unpacking the issues from your childhood and having a clear look at them, might be the good first step that a counselor would recommend. Abuse exists in homeschooled circles the same way abuse exists in all other circles - public educucated, private schooled, or what have you. Your experience with your family doesn't sound like the average homeschooled kid's experience. It certainly doesn't reflect my kid's homeschooling experience...

From the Gospel Principles manual:

We believe that when we die, we go to one of two places to wait a while - paradise or spirit prison. We also believe that these places are not very far away from our mortal realm here. Our doctrine doesn't have a heck of a lot to say about ghosts, but there is some stuff in our Gospel Principles book, chapter 41. Several Latter-day prophets have said that the spirits of those who have died are not far from us. President Ezra Taft Benson said: “Sometimes the veil between this life and the life beyond becomes very thin. Our loved ones who have passed on are not far from us” I've heard good 1sthand ghost stories from various members, including some who I consider very intelligent and not susceptible to being fooled. I consider it fun to speculate, but we just don't know that much.

Mennonite? Cool! I had a boss a few years back who was a Mennonite. She gave us a copy of Wind in the Willows for my newborn daughter. Very nice person. Yeah - you can find Mormons who speculate about Lillith, but like others have said, she's not really included in our doctrine.

Yeah, being able to clearly identify specific behavior, and being able to unambiguously say it will no longer be tolerated, is 90% of the battle here. Put your mom on notice that you will no longer tolerate [whatever] from her. She will believe you are bluffing, and do it anyway. Make the consequence clear and immediate. Some moms are trainable, others aren't. Give her the chance to show which one she is, then treat her accordingly.