Misshalfway

I think it's normal to hit spiritual slumps. And as Dr. Suess says, "unslumping yourself is not easily done". There's a few different methods that have worked for me. Sometimes I have conversations with myself and get reacquainted with what I really want. Other times I act according to my values instead of listening exclusively to my feelings. And other times, I just wait it out. Being in a slump gets old. And when I get sick of it, that usually gives me adequate motivation to get myself out. And still other times, I do what you are doing. I reach out for advice hoping that someone will say something that will hit home.

Wow. You are smart...AND you write bumper stickers. When in doubt, talk it out. It's catchy!

It's ok, Estradling, if you don't get my humor. Perhaps our "snark-charts" are not compatible.

Alucar, I'll admit that I'm having a little fun at your expense. And I swear I'll repent of it just as soon as I'm done.

That's it! It wasn't the eyebrows at all. It was the star charts! I should have known...

I like to hedge my bets too. That's why I always send a packet to fill out before the first date. My assistent usually takes care of the first visual screening.

Why is this thread reminding me of the movie "Gattaca"?

And apparently a lot of headaches too....

Sometimes we need anti-depressants before the wedding. And sometimes we need them after. Migraines. Wow. And the list goes on and on? How exactly did your wife make the cut?

The truth is I enjoy reading both you and JAG. There. I've flattered both of you equally. : First mistake due to the 14 hour shift. Second mistake due to the 14 hour shift hangover.

I really enjoyed this.:) It made me remember how I broke up with this guy because of his eye brows. The truth was, I just wasn't that into him, but all I could picture was our children running around school with his eye brow mess across their foreheads.

We do too. It's a show I can watch with my kids. When does that ever happen anymore?

That Top Gear show is pretty funny. I just watched the one where they drove three cars through the jungles of South America, and three other cars through the desert. It was so entertaining.

This post sounds more balanced to me.

OH shoot, Estradling75. I was posting last night after a 14 hour shift and considering a lot of JAG's posts. Please forgive me. Like I said earlier. I don't have any problem whatsoever with admonitions for carrying a current recommend. My concern is with the doctrinal discrepancies and , as MOE said so well, the manipulative rhetoric that leads people into imbalanced and harmful beliefs. And I'll add that I don't have any problem even with a soft or sharp approach. Sometimes a sharp tone is needful and can be spirit filled. Nor do I think me or the members of my stake are suffering from hard-hearted syndrome. And I might have a different perspective than you do about sustaining leaders. I believe God uses the weak things of the world to get his work done. On that very day I met with the Stake President, I felt a huge wave of spirit flood my heart as I entered his office. It took me back. But I also remember a profound withdrawal of the spirit when he spoke those words. It was an interesting lesson for me to have been shown how God works with the imperfection. It taught me another lesson about sustaining leaders and trusting what God is doing with them, and also in balancing that with not always trusting the arm of the flesh. What I am saying is that I do sustain my leaders, but I have learned through sad experience not to trust them implicitly. But I trust the spirit and I trust Father's wisdom. I trust the Lord will differentiate the wheat from the tares for me when it's needful .....even when he helps me discern it in my priesthood leaders. BTW....you didn't answer my question.

I'll admit to getting a little "high" off watching the "Housewives of NYC". I can't stomach it much anymore. But at the time, it was fun to watch women behave badly. I concluded that it was the female version of "Rambo". :) And I too have been invested in the outcome of the Bachelor/ette series. Again, I think I'm over it cuz I just can't stomach the stuff. And I'm now too invested in "Downton Abbey." :)

Well....I don't typically make decisions about people based upon such arbitrary information. Being on an antidepressant is a very poor indicator of how a person would manage in marriage.

Baptismal ordinances don't need to be big social flashy affairs. There only needs to be two witnesses there to "witness" the ordinance. You can work together with your missionaries or whoever is planning the event to make it comfortable for you. (And coming from a mental health prospective, challenging some of your anxieties is a good thing. Betcha that your fear about the thing is way bigger deal than the actual event. At the end, you'll prolly say, that was all it was?) It sounds like too that you have some desire and some "knowing" percolating inside of you. But maybe you are worried about fully committing to the lifestyle/schedule of the mormon way. It's ok to be concerned or hesitant about that. I've felt feelings come to me that were similar. This is where exercising some faith can help. It's my experience that if I take my marching orders from my hesitance, that I stay stuck. If I take my marching orders from my "knowings" and I follow them in faith, most of my concerns disappear as I get on the other side of the threshold.

Well, this is good. If you'd dump them, then you saved them from being in a very corrosive and unsupportive relationship. You can sleep well at night knowing you've done a public service.

I think it's ok to talk about the importance of physical appearance. There is no doubt in my mind that simple things like taking care of oneself helps support the relationship in various ways. And it's ok to say to ask that your partner try to look nice and stay fit. It's fair to ask for a lifestyle that maintains health of all kinds. I think this becomes problematic when these preferences turn perfectionistic and lose important leavening agents like empathy and compassion.

Of course it's appropriate to ask all those questions. What makes you wonder that it's not ok? I was engaged once to a young man who kept insisting that he buy me a large diamond engagement ring. I didn't know how he could afford such a purchase having just returned from the mish and having little money to take me on dates. I confronted this gently one day. He became enraged because I had "questioned" him. It was a huge red flag and I later ended the relationship. I'm not sure that there is any topic that is off limits. But I do think that one should go into these conversations in wisdom and discernment. If one is looking for perfection, they are going to be disappointed. If one is overlooking or minimizing red flags because they don't want to be judged or rejected, or because they don't want to hurt someone's feelings, then something is out of balance and we should be red flagging ourselves for not acting in self love/protection. It's ok to screen people to see if they are a good addition to our lives. There is no perfect relationships. I know of no scenario within relationships that are friction or problem free. But we can and should make wise decisions about who we allow into our intimate lives.

My understanding is that a person needs to talk to the bishop about the types of sins that require priesthood authority to clear. (serious sexual transgressions is the most obvious.) We don't need to confess all of our sins to a bishop each week. Unless, of course, our weekly sins are serious in nature. When I conceptualize the repentance process, I've learned to do so with a solid grounding in personal responsibility, an embracing of agency, and an evaluation of my own set of desires for spiritual growth. If I have desire to be clean, and then to progress in spiritual refinements, I'll seek out the paths that help me do that. Seeing the bishop is sometimes part of that. It's not really about "needing" the bishop as a person. This kind of growth really isn't about the bishop wants, desires, opinions at all, although counsel can be helpfully compelling sometimes. It's about his priesthood office and how we need the confession/restitution piece to transform our hearts into something more fit for the kingdom and for the companionship of the holy spirit.

As a side note....he also said in Stake Conference that we needed to focus on the temple but since we can't turn our houses so all the front doors face the temple, we should all get telescopes. I think Apple's post explains my feelings the best. I have no problem whatsoever with a SP (or anyone for that matter) exhorting members to keep their recommends current. I simply have a problem with the doctrinal discrepancies in his approach. JAG... I appreciate your zealousness. But I'd like to understand if you have any doctrinal source to support the idea that the question "Was your TR current when you died?" will be part of the judgment. What I can be sure of is the absence of the spirit I felt when he spoke this teaching. I told this story to my dad who works regularly at the temple and asked how he felt about this teaching. He chuckled and said that God's going to be turning away lots of cute older folks. Cuz many times the older folks show up to do their temple shift and completely forget their card expired. :)

Am I correct that if ones recommend has expired, they must be interviewed by the bishop AND the stake president? And if so, then how long would the recommend need to be expired for this to happen? A day? A month? Six months? I just want to be clear on this. Also, something is happening in my stake that is really bothering me and its coming from the SP. In an effort to encourage folks to keep their recommends current, he often teaches that those who let it lapse even for a day will not be allowed into heaven. He often uses the parabel of the virgins and the lamp to illustrate the point by stating that the oil is symbolic of having a current recommend. The "bride groom will not let you into the wedding" if you don't have your recommend. In my TR interview recently, he said that the first question I'll be asked on the other side is whether or not the date on my card was current when I died. When asked about the state of my heart at my death, he said that it would be irrelavent if I didn't have a current card and that Jesus will say "I know you not". I've been hearing the stump speech for about 2 yrs now. This bug anyone else like it bugs me?

How can you be with a companion when you haven't been assigned one? When they set you apart, I'm sure they have to know you'll have a week of dead time. Perhaps you should ask your priesthood leader for specific interim instructions. If you don't get it, do the best you can. Don't go on dates. Don't be alone with a female. Beyond that, relax, keep up that scripture study, and enjoy the ride.