Seminary

[Nelly]

I love seminary don't get me wrong. It has helped me get through my day before I go to school.

I always went to seminary I only missed 2 days my freshman year, and 1 my sophomore year. My junior year I just started getting a lot of tardies. That's when I got my new seminary teacher that year.

She's a really cool teacher and all but, it really makes me angry by the things she does. I'm not doing this to complain or anything, I just need some advice.

I'm always on time. I never miss a day unless I'm really sick. She just sent me my absences from this year (senior year) I have 15 so far. I know I didn't miss that much I know I missed around 5 and that's it. She gets angry with me constantly more when I don't do anything wrong and I'm paying attention to the lesson.

I feel like she plays favoritism a lot in there because these two kids who don't show up for seminary and show up 20 minutes late everyday, they have less absences than me. I'm in this special health academy program for high school and I get very busy work a lot and I was working on homework one day and she got annoyed and said something to me about it but when other people are doing their homework or sleeping she never says anything to them.

She always complains to my mother that I don't pay attention or I'm disruptive in class but my mother watches by the room to see what I am up to, and I'm not doing anything wrong. I tried talking to my seminary teacher about it but she refuses to talk to me and work it out.

I don't know what to do at this point, and seminary is becoming such a hard time for me to come because of what I have to deal with. I was thinking of switching to independent study.

What should I do?

[Gwen]

if your mom has witnessed the behavior (i assume she also knows how many times you were absent) has she talked to the teacher? have the other students commented about noticing favoritism as well?

[Nelly]

Yes my mother has and so has my other friend's mother. Other students also have absents for when they were there. When I tried talking to her she wouldn't. Even when I told her I was sorry for doing my homework but I was still paying attention, there's other kids that are in this IB program and she never says anything to them. I just resorted to just sitting in there quietly and not really discussing anything of what she is teaching because she never agreed with my discussions or opinions in the class and I'm not the only one who feels this way.

[Gwen]

how did she respond to your mom trying to talk to her?

are there other classes you might can change to?

[Nelly]

No, that's the closets one to my school. She wouldn't say anything really to my mother but how I disrupt the class and I don't do what I'm suppose to which my mother sees that this doesn't happen.

[WmLee]

Having taught seminary I see both sides. I have had students that simply don’t pay attention, pass notes or are doing homework, some come just to sleep; and I consider myself the failure for note preparing or presenting the material in a way that would make the students want to pay attention, want o participate.

At the same time, I expect the students to try to follow mw and give me some insight as to what they find interesting with the subject matter. I think a teacher needs to do more than just teach what is written in the scriptures. A teacher needs to put the topic, the lesson, into practical application for you, the student, today.

Don’t quit, but keep a written log as to when you are there, when you are not, when you are late and what the lesson was about. The next time there is a problem or you feel you are being treated wrong, show her what you have. If that doesn’t work, take it to your bishop. He should be able to help.

I once had a student who was always late and just didn’t pay attention. One day I asked and question and no one seemed ready to answer. This young man was busy talking to a young lady. In a loud voice I asked, “Isn’t that right Bret”? And he quickly said, “Yes”. I thanked him and told him what I asked was for him to come to class the next day in a skirt and heels. I told him to try not to be late.

The next day he was late but he had on a skirt and heels. He was always late and never paid attention. After serving a mission he went to BYU Idaho and now is an institute director in California.

Don’t give up on the teacher, and the teacher shouldn’t give up on you!

[Nelly]

Thank you WmLee, that was really great advice!!! I do have a journal I keep in there and I do write down what's from the lesson and what I 'learn' from there. I even put down the dates as well. I know it's really hard for the teachers who teach seminary to wake up so early, as we do. I just feel like she doesn't even like teaching and she dreads being there. She just became a person that is only cool outside of seminary.

One time she had us get into groups and teach a lesson for a day. We all did this and 3 groups had 50 minutes to teach and we had to use all those 50 minutes. When it got to this one group they were to teach the same amount of time but they only taught for 10 minutes. She let them stop after this time as well. It didn't really bother me, but it bothered other people. This is where a lot of favoritism came into play.

I use to have such a great seminary teacher who use to put everything in more than just the scriptures and more about life lessons and what dealt with the topic. We were able to have much more open discussion and spiritual experiences to share with each other. I felt like I learned so much from her as opposed to what I'm learning in seminary now. My old seminary teacher told her she would even substitute for her if she ever needed anyone and she would never let her do it. I could understand if it would make someone feel like we prefer her over the new seminary teacher but, that wouldn't happen. We'd just have a better substitute that we were familiar with their teaching style

than the substitutes we get when she doesn't wake up earlier enough after we call her or such to see if she comes.

And I know there are days that it does get boring and I will talk to my friend for a little but I make sure I'm not loud. We use to do seminary scripture mastery a lot but she just quit on that and a lot more people had a lot done last year opposed to this year. I feel like me and two other people are doing the most on that at the moment.

I even tried talking to her, and I asked her to send me an e-mail back with what days I miss. I don't miss seminary unless I miss school days except for one time when I had mid-terms for my college class and I was really stressing out. She never replied back to me, it's been over a week.

I love seminary and all but it's just to the point where why even bother going anymore if I can't get that spiritual experience or have a good time learning about what I'm being taught. There's 3 kids who use to be a regular that are converts in the church and they stopped coming in the middle of the year because they said they weren't getting enough spiritually fed and they felt like they weren't learning anything waking up this early anymore.

I feel like she needs to put a little more effort into her lessons and help us be more involved than just sitting there asking questions all the time and not having a discussion or something good with it.

I have approached her many times with being a direct and honest as I can be. I don't know if I should just suck it up and get it over with for the next month and half I have left, or try to keep doing something about it until I figure out how to fix it.

Thanks so much :)

[Gwen]

you have a right to know what days she says you were out. attendance will effect if you get credit for the yr. at the very least i would focus on getting that straight. there should be someone in your stake responsible for the training of the teachers that is to over see everything. i would ask your mom to inquire about the days absent and if she is uncooperative then i would ask your mom to go to the stake person. when you start going up the line "complaining" it's best if a parent takes the lead.

[Nelly]

Thank you Gwen. My mom has asked her for the days also and she never gave them back to her and my mom is her visiting teacher as well. My mother is going to talk to the guy who is responsible for the training who comes once in a while to see what goes on in our seminary as well. I just hope it all works out because I know I've gotten credit for all my 3 years so far, and it would be kind of messed up if I don't receive credit for my last year. I was accepted to BYU and I don't want it to affect mine or the others who also did get accepted to not get credit.

[GADBabaganoosh]

To those who are frustrated with teaching difficult students, don't be. You have some effect. Just be loving and try to involve them. Am I a seminary teacher? No. I was the student that didn't pay attention, or care. (I'd bring Fantasy or Sci Fi books to read, the teacher would come up and say "Hey you won't find second nephi in there!" I would reply "No kidding") I always sluffed. They would tell my mom, and I would tell her I didn't care. Me and my friends were jerks to the teacher. I wasn't active in church during high school. So years later, i decide to become active and go on a mission. I go, and all the while, i wish i had paid attention to the teacher, because I knew very little, to nothing of the scriptures when I was first out. (I remedied it with intense study every morning though.) I would love to find the Seminary teacher and apologize for being an idiot.

As for the teacher seeming to play favorites, who cares? Go, participate, and if she's actin weird, let her. Do what you are supposed to and it will work out in the end. Don't cater to the teachers interest, just do the work the teacher asks. If the spirit prompts you, pipe in. You are there to learn, so learn. If it isn't from the teacher, then so be it.

[Nelly]

It has nothing to do about favoritism or any sort of that. I pay attention to the lessons I write down in my journal of what they are. What makes me mad is that she tells me I've been absent for 15 days when I haven't even missed that many days and she won't tell me which days they were. She even refuses to talk to my mother about the problem.

[GADBabaganoosh]

Have your mom call her and obtain a copy of the attendance record. Also make sure if it was one that was passed around that you didn't just make the simple mistake of not checking off which day you were there.

[Elgama]

Nelly I don't know your entire situation and I could be wrong, but we had a seminary teacher who bullied the kids in a very similar way (she has since gone on to abuse my daughter in primary its a long story), if she is treating you badly and won't respond to your Mum go to the Stake or the CES director, don't let it continue, because if it is bullying you can guarantee someone else will be targeted next year. Maybe I am wrong, maybe she is just bad in the mornings.

Get a blessing about this, pray, fast if you have too but I get the impression everything in your gut is screaming the way you are being treated is wrong, and your Mom must have concerns if she is watching

[Nelly]

Nelly I don't know your entire situation and I could be wrong, but we had a seminary teacher who bullied the kids in a very similar way (she has since gone on to abuse my daughter in primary its a long story), if she is treating you badly and won't respond to your Mum go to the Stake or the CES director, don't let it continue, because if it is bullying you can guarantee someone else will be targeted next year. Maybe I am wrong, maybe she is just bad in the mornings.

Get a blessing about this, pray, fast if you have too but I get the impression everything in your gut is screaming the way you are being treated is wrong, and your Mom must have concerns if she is watching

Thank you Elgama. I'm not the only one this is being done to. It's other several kids in our seminary as well. I haven't seen her in a week because I've been on spring break but, when I see her I will try to talk to her again if she won't my mom is going to go to the guy who is the CES director to figure out what to do and get this solved.

I think it came to the point with her she doesn't want to be there anymore. She complains about teaching us and waking up in the morning saying how she never gets any sleep, and us students we barely go to bed early and we never complain.

I just hope it all works out. Thanks Elgama :)

[Elgama]

Pray about it but personally I would ask your Mom to sit in the class with you, and I wouldn't speak to her alone. I am only going by very short posts and its similarity to my own experience, so if I am wrong ignore it lol. Ultimately because she is the adult and you can't get any joy being polite this is a battle I think maybe your Mom should fight for you