Putting what we know into practice

[NeuroTypical]

Here's a situation:

You're sitting in a restaurant, and you can't help but overhear a conversation happening behind you. It's getting a bit louder as it progresses. There is a mom and dad, and their 19 year old daughter. The daughter apparently has recently become a stripper, and she's worked up the courage to tell her parents. The daughter has moved out of her parent's home. The mom is on the verge of tears, her emotions vividly running across her face. The dad is showing frustration, sadness, anger. Both parents are reacting pretty much like you can see yourself reacting if you were in their shoes. The daughter looks like she'd rather be anywhere else but here, but she's got her heels dug in and is resolved to get this information communicated to her parents.

As the conversation goes back and forth, you get the sense that the parents are well grounded and mature with a good moral foundation, and they raised their daughter with these benefits. The dad catches your eye, and throwing his hands up in a gesture of frustration and surrender says 'Yeah, that's right - my daughter's decided to become a stripper!'. All three of them, probably out of desperation, stop talking and look at you.

So, ball is in your court - what do you do to help this girl?

This really happened to my wife yesterday. (She always ends up in the middle of stuff like this) Believe it or not, she had a great answer. Lots of gospel principles put into action with her answer. I wanna hear y'alls best answers, then I'll relate what my wife said.

LM

[hordak]

You should be proud of the fact that your daughter is so mature that she would come to you and tell you of her employment, knowing that you would disagree with it. While she might not be doing what you would want from her you can rest assured that the strength you taught her will serve her well in this job.

or

"Don't look at me, i have boys";)

[Guest]

I would say, "Unfortunately, she is old enough to choose for herself what life she wants to lead. But, if you trust that you raised her up properly, she will be alright."

Or

"Better you than me!"

[NeuroTypical]

So, those are both bits of advice for the parents - but what would help the daughter?

Anyone?

[MarginOfError]

"Money is one of the dirtiest substances in our society. Make sure you wash often and thoroughly."

[Suzie]

You mean, I am in a restaurant...a complete stranger to this people, they look at me for an answer (my assumption) and somewhat I feel pressured to give one? Sorry, not me. Long ago I learned you do not get involved in people's private life (particularly people you don't know) because you never know the whole story. You are only seeing the consequence but not the road that took the three of them to be in that position.

[Gwen]

Long ago I learned you do not get involved in people's private life (particularly people you don't know) because you never know the whole story. You are only seeing the consequence but not the road that took the three of them to be in that position.

in most cases i would agree with this sentiment but there are also some ppl in this world that ppl just turn to. i personally think it's something about their spirits. my mom is one of those ppl. it seems no matter where she goes someone is telling her their life story. it always amazed me. i remember on one occasion, when i was rather young my mom and i were in the store and the checkout lady was telling my mom her life story and asking for advise. i asked my mom when we left if she knew her and the answer was "no, ppl just do that to me". i saw it time and time again. it happens to me a lot. not quite to the extent it does my mom but she is more outgoing than i am. the first time was in 5th grade. after that i spent most of middle school with a friend that was suicidal but wouldn't talk to anyone but me about it. i think it's just part of some ppl's calling/talents in this world and those kinds of things do happen. it's not wrong, it's who they are.

[NeuroTypical]

So, my wife looked at the girl brightly and said "pole or cage", in the same tone that someone would use if someone had told her they'd taken up fishing, and she was asking 'fresh or saltwater'.

The parents eyes got pretty large (as did mine, as did probably most of yours I'm guessing). The girl assumed she'd found someone that would be on her side of the discussion, and said there was a pole on the stage, but 'she didn't really like to use it'.

My wife then asked "Did they tell you what it's there for?" When the girl stuttered a bit, wondering how to put her answer into terms that she could say in front of her parents, my wife let her know the pole was there to give the dancer something to hold on to, to make it harder to get grabbed and dragged down into the audience. And the cage is there to keep people in the audience from getting to her. The girl turned a shade or two whiter as she caught the vision.

My wife then talked a bit about the kinds of guys who show up on the front row of a strip club, and said very sympathetically "So, when you get beat up or worse for the first time, give me a call." The girl got another shade paler, and left with her parents - sort of leaning on her father as she'd become a bit unsteady from the impact of this extra information about her new career.

Love unfeigned, with a respect of the principle of agency, add a genuine desire to serve her neighbor, teamed up with a little bit of being wise as a serpent - all those working together managed to make a dent in this girl. Will it help? Dunno. The girl left so fast she forgot to get my wife's number, so we'll probably never know. I do know that my wife's answer is much better than anything I could have come up with. She rocks.

LM

[Guest]

I'm not as good as your wife but what I would say to the daughter would be in the line of, "I always tell my boys to keep improving their vocabulary so that when they have to speak, they won't have to go to the gutter for a word. I tell them the same thing about their careers - to educate themselves so they won't have to strip for a living. If it's either strip or starve, there's always food stamps."

But then, in reality, if faced with the actual situation, I would more than likely shrug my shoulders and just smile.

[Guest mormonmusic]

I'd ask her why she wants to be a stripper, and then address the reasons.