HELP Please!

[SOONtoB]

Over the years I used to have a problem with Pornography, and with pornography came the masterbation... I did talk to my bishop about it many times.... and one of the problems has came back... the pornography is really not a problem anymore.... I was just wondering if I should still talk to my bishop... I have talked to him before.... i feel sorrow for my sins.... and they always seem to come back just when I stop reading my scriptures daily... I would love any advice... and I know my Bishop is there to give me advice... and he has and he has helped me... I see what I am doing wrong.... If I keep reading my scriptures I wont be tempted to do this thing... So I was wondering if I still NEED to talk to him... because my savior and father are the ones who forgive me right? the bishop is just there to Help??

[SOONtoB]

I have also started to fill our my papers for a mission but now this sin has came back any advice on that also???

[Guest Alana]

As I understand it, sexual sins need to be confessed to a Bishop or similar Priesthood leader. This doesn't mean every time we have an impure thought we run in there, but with something has become a habit, sounds like exactly what the Bishop is for. Heavenly Father forgives us, but only after we've fully repented, and sometimes a needed part of that is talking to the Bishop. Since this is a repeated thing and it's imperative that you're honest about your actions in concerning to preparing for a mission, I again think it's needed for you to talk to your Bishop.

[SOONtoB]

Ok well I attend a university so would my university bishop tell my home bishop what I have done??

[pam]

Where are your Church records? At University or back at home?

[WindRiver]

My mission president told us as missionaries that we did not have to have an interview with him and confess our transgression every time we had a problem in that area, unless we felt it was getting out of control. My understanding was that it was not on the level of seriousness such as fornication, adultery or breaking major laws, where one would be required without exception to confess the transgression to your Bishop. Maybe someone who is a Bishop now and has access to the handbook can shed some light on that if I am wrong. If every member of the church had to go and talk to their bishop every time that happened, or every time they broke the word of wisdom, the Bishop would have to quit is day job just to handle the interviews.

If you can't control it by yourself and you feel like you should talk to your Bishop, then do it. You would want to set up an interview with the Bishop who presides over the ward where your records are if possible but the Bishop in your home ward can also talk to you and I am sure he would be more than glad to.

I don't quite understand what you are driving at in the part about him telling your home ward bishop but I don't think he would do so. Having never been a bishop I don't know what kinds of records are kept on moral transgression events or what type of communication is required under church guidelines between current and previous Bishops or home ward Bishops for students. My guess is that they do not communicate details with each other.

Edited April 18, 2010 by WindRiver

[dazed-and-confused]

my friend, i have to ask you....why do you NOT want to talk further to your bishop?

you must understand, an addiction does not simply go away. as sincere as we are about feeling repentance, we are just as sincere at looking at some way to continue the addiction, usually through some rationalization or other.

i would urge you to continue your talks about it with your bishop AND seek out a 12 step group dealing with sexual addiction.

just so you know, and i have posted a bit of my own history here before, i was sexually abused VERY young and then throughout my teens. i was introduced to hardcore pornographic photos when i was 7.

all of my abusers were adult females. that along with the severe mental and emotional abuse from my own family, mother and older sister (father died when i was 5), really messed me up in so many ways.

i am now 58, have been through LOTS of therapy, counseling, prayer, religious study and application of meditative techniques. i do happen to know a bit about what you are dealing with.

and if you think that you're not that bad because your own history was NOTHING like mine, you're fooling yourself. you have an addiction to sex, plain and simple. you need help in dealing with it. do not be ashamed of what you need to do. embrace it and deal with it. it is my prayer that you are able to, in Jesus name i pray, amen.

[dazed-and-confused]

by the way...if what i told you about my own history excites you, even in the slightest, then you're not nearly far enough along in your own recovery.

[SOONtoB]

Well I talked to my bishop today and I feel a lot better.... I realised earlier that I dont care if my home bishop found out... it doesnt really matter I sould tell him to... but now I can start my road to repentance I thank you all for your posts!

[dizzysmiles]

Go in and get the help you need. Otherwise it will eat you alive. The bishop (regardless of which one) will be more proud of you for wanting to be clean than hiding it.

Edited April 23, 2010 by dizzysmiles

[dizzysmiles]

p.s I just logged in and think someone hacked in my profile, I have no idea who sethesus is?!

[baver3]

Let me warn you that the spirit in the MTC is so strong that you will practically feel COMPELLED to expel your past sins. So if you dont take care of that now then you are going to have to face it in the MTC and believe me you dont want that. You dont want to risk having to possibly go home after having come so far. That will be very painful. You will want EVERY SINGLE past wrong taken care of so that you can have full confidence in your spiritually and worthiness.

I am happy you went and talked to someone. I would say if you are addicted then definately talk to your bishop, if you just slipped up and did it once and then corrected yourself then I would say you could fix the problem promptly through prayer and rededication to following the commandments. From here on out I would make your scripture study a priority since you mentioned that it only happens when you stop reading (aka: having the spirit with you).

[dizzysmiles]

Go to the bishop, and in the meantime it's free and the only way its really going to help you stop a releapse is going to the free porn 12 step program the lds church puts out. If you go to family services on lds.org you will find addiction/recovery programs. Click on it and find one in your area. I know its embarrising at first, but its SO Worth it. Also read the book " HE did deliver me from bondage" its the 12 step program book and " Forgiving ourselves" IT is a powerful wonderful book. You're a good guy. We all have weakness's and this too shall pass. Hang in there.

[dazed-and-confused]

Well I talked to my bishop today and I feel a lot better.... I realised earlier that I dont care if my home bishop found out... it doesnt really matter I sould tell him to... but now I can start my road to repentance I thank you all for your posts!

VERY good for you. i know that there are a lot of feelings associated with what you are dealing with, fear and shame are probably the strongest. have you noticed by now, however, that when you step into your feelings and talk about it with someone you trust, that you feel BETTER?

keep it up, and again.....good for you.