Mission Paper Probation

[readyreadyman]

[Removed so sinners can't read this]

Edited October 23, 2010 by readyreadyman

[NeuroTypical]

Sin stinks. It's not about other people forgiving, it's about you accepting the consequences of your actions. Yes, it stinks a lot to have everybody and their dog knowing something's up with you. If people gossip, it hurts. And it's useless, that's why gossip is a sin.

I just wish I knew how to gain back trust and control over MY life.

One reason sin stinks, is when people hear about it, they might think differently about you. Especially if you've violated their trust. Once trust is lost, it can take a long time to get back. You can't make someone trust you, you can only live life as someone trustworthy, and hope people see it and give you back their trust. Some people might never do that.

However, having trust does not equal having control. You have as much control over your life right now, that you did before sinning. You're just enduring consequences.

These are the things that we all go through. You don't sound like a horrible person. You sound like someone who just wants to put past sins behind him. So endure your consequences, and then move on with life. Sorry it'll take longer than you were originally expecting.

LM

[ZappBrannigan]

As a parent of a teenager who has made some really large mistakes, I can tell you that it can be hard to place trust in your child again. The best advice I can offer is to be as transparent as possible with your parents, and make the extra effort to show then you have changed.

As for the disciplinary actions, I don't know anything about them.

[beefche]

I hope that I'm saying something you already understand. Your parents love you. Everything they do is because of that love.

You screwed up. It sounds like you are being responsible and taking your licks for it. But part of the screw up is you lost trust with some people you love and people who love you. Welcome to adulthood. There are always consequences to our actions (both good and bad).

So, yes, you lost trust with your parents. And their actions/words show that now--but because they love you, they WANT to trust you, but more than that, they want you to succeed and be happy. So, make your actions count. Show them they can count on you to be trustworthy and responsible. Listen to them--really listen--they have a wealth of knowledge and experience.

[rameumptom]

Ten Commandments. HONOR thy Father and thy Mother. Perhaps the problem is you are not taking this as serious as you should. Why make you wait so many months? Because it IS serious. And they have years of experience on you.

Yes, it is your life. But you are wanting to serve a mission. For those 2 years it is not your life. It is the Lord's service. I've seen too many young elders with pride issues that just did not do well on their missions, because they wanted to do their own thing. They wanted things their way, instead of the Lord's way.

Personally, your complaining tells me that you are NOT ready for a mission. D&C 4 teaches the requirements for it, and it includes obedience and humility. Murmuring is a sign of rebellion. You are murmuring against your parents, who the Lord has commanded you to honor, as well as your priesthood leaders. Will you rebel against your mission president while on the mission? If you don't learn to humbly obey now, that is what will happen on your mission.

To be a missionary means you don't shake your fist and demand respect. It means you drop to your knees in humility and beg for forgiveness and obey even if it is hard.

[Guest mormonmusic]

If you're like me in situations where I've lost people's trust, you'll probably be kicking yourself for a while. You have to act in ways that are inconsistent with their mistrustful beliefs. You can decide what that means, but you will have to make sacrifices for a while until you get the trust back. And its work.

I think it also helps to just accept what's happening -- those things you can't change. Focus on those things you DO have control over, like reading Preach My Gospel, Jesus the Christ, A Marvelous Work and a Wonder, going out with the missionaries to get experience, saving money for the mission or when you get home, doing whatever you can to prepare for the day you can serve your mission. Try to be positive toward your leaders and try not to resent them...I resented mine for a while due to the lack of vision and faith I perceived on their part (they told me to stay home from my mission since money was an issue and they didn't think I could earn what I needed in a reasonable time given my age).

Like you, I was forced to stay home for a full TWO years due to lack of money in the Stake and Ward missionary funds. I felt a little bitter about it at first, but then just knuckled down and did what was in my power to get ready for that day I would leave.

It's frustrating, I know, but try not to let it canker your heart. Do what you can within your current circumstances.

[ConquestT4]

I bet you weren't thinking about these consequences when you first sinned. You can't choose your consequences. You can't choose for other people. A mature response to this situation would be to accept it and humble yourself. I think deep down inside you feel this isn't fair. You have to accept that this is exactly what the Lord wants for you right now. Its what he is using to mold you. You being surprised by all of this is part of the repentance process. You have to get through it to be forgiven completely and to totally change. I bet you aren't going to do it again.

I have learned that worthiness is not a light bulb that can be turned on and off. Im clean! Now I sinned.... ooohhh..... guess what... I just repented! Now I'm clean again. Life! Hello life... everything go back to normal. Its not an undo button. Our sins get covered by the Atonement. Everything will balance out but you can't change the fact that you sinned. What you did it what you did. You just have to look at it positively, be humble and make the best of your situation. Want what God wants. Think like He thinks. Use this time to your advantage. I know its hard when your expectations aren't met but you have to face this. I can relate to how you are feeling but nothing we do or say will change your situation for you. Just make the best of it and things will get better. It will feel good once you can look back on it. Make sure you are 100% clean during these next 4 months. Satan will try and get you to slip up again and you could end up waiting another year! Don't underestimate his cunningness and don't underestimate God's power to make you clean again. Make sure you change completely and have a FULL repentance. You have to change your state of mind. Just abstaining from sin is only 80% per say. Eliminate that desire to sin as much as you can. Thats part of true repentance.