Have I gone too far?


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Okay... I'm going to make this quick and blunt because its the sin that matters and not the story behind it.

I'm a fifteen year old girl and I've had internet sex (chat room format, not video or picture and I usually pretended to be an older man interested in boys my age) and I've had issues with masturbation since I was twelve.

I've completely stopped fooling around online and it doesn't even hold any allure for me anymore. The masturbation has been harder to quit, mostly because for a long while it was the only way I could sleep (sorry if thats too much info) but other than a few occasional slip ups, I've also stopped that as well.

I know I need to confess to my bishop. I've already confessed to him about my troubles with pornography (in written form, not picture) and ever since then I feel comfortable talking to him. It's just... I'm still nervous, you know? How far is too far? What if because of these things I've done I'm too impure to ever go into the temple? I just have this fear of telling him how much of a perv I was online and then WHAM! being excommunicated.

So, uh, I guess what I'm really asking is... HAVE I gone too far? Am I past the point of forgiveness?

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Past the point of forgivenes? Not at all. That should not be used as an excuse to allow yourself to do more because you can be forgiven for more, but you most certainly are not past the point of forgiveness. Look to the Book of Mormon and you will find examples of far worse sins being forgiven.

Are There Points of No Return in Our Lives?

Satan, “the father of all lies” (2 Nephi 2:18), “the father of contention” (3 Nephi 11:29), “the author of all sin” (Helaman 6:30), and the “enemy unto God” (Moroni 7:12), uses the forces of evil to convince us that this concept applies whenever we have sinned. The scriptures call him the “accuser” because he wants us to feel that we are beyond forgiveness (see Revelation 12:10). Satan wants us to think that when we have sinned we have gone past a “point of no return”—that it is too late to change our course. In our beautiful but also troubled world, it is a sad reality that this attitude is the source of great sorrow, grief, and distress to families, marriages, and individual lives.

Satan tries to counterfeit the work of God, and by doing this he may deceive many. To make us lose hope, feel miserable like himself, and believe that we are beyond forgiveness, Satan might even misuse words from the scriptures that emphasize the justice of God, in order to imply that there is no mercy. . . .

Christ came to save us. If we have taken a wrong course, the Atonement of Jesus Christ can give us the assurance that sin is not a point of no return. A safe return is possible if we will follow God’s plan for our salvation.

Point of Safe Return - Dieter F. Uchtdorf

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Most Bishops understand that when someone sits down with them, not all sins will be revealed. It's a process, and one that more sins become confessed as a person get's more comfortable with whom they're sharing the information with. Repentance is a process. It's in the striving that counts. Go confess it all and get through it. Understand that you will slip and you will have down times, but if you stick with it, there will be more and more up times.

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  • 4 weeks later...

The big point of going to the Bishop and working on repentace is not necessarily how bad the sin was, but how much you want to change.

You will not be excommunicated, I'm sure of it. He will be so relieved that you want to get better. The desire to get right with God again is a great big first step. He will help you with the rest of the steps, and yes, someday you will be able to go to the temple and be sealed and have a wonderful relationship with someone you can have those feelings about.

Go talk with him, he probably already knows there is more to discuss.

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some things to remember in this process.

1. In talking with the bishop, you aren't confessing to him so much as you are asking for help in confessing to Heavenly Father. In other words, don't view your bishop as the one in charge, because he doesn't see himself that way either. He's playing a similar role as Jesus in that he's an advocate for you. He's on your side in this.

2. As mentioned above, Jesus is on your side as well. He's been through what you're feeling. He knows what needs to be done.

3. Most importantly, remember that Heavenly Father himself wants you to overcome this issue. Everything he has set in place for us has been geared for helping us conquer our weaknesses. Though he is the true authority, He does not want to punish us.

take courage and realize you're not the only person to struggle with this. Also realize people have overcome this issue as well. There's every reason to have hope in your heart as you work through your struggle.

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