Darn computers!!!!!

[slamjet]

I updated some billing software that I'm going to have to do on multiple occasions because Medicare (as well as other insurance companies) are changing to HIPAA 5010 in January. Update, ok, but with some bugs including one that is so glaring, the programmers had to have been morons to not catch it. All the electronic billing files have a whole bunch of "†" everywhere in the file! If there was a space, there was a "†"! He even replicated it on his own machine! Now I'll give that because it's a Utah company and that some Catholic might be playing a joke, but please, one final check of the electronic billing on the "gold disk" version would have shown this error. Now I get to call them back because provider codes are not showing up in the transactions windows. Oh please, why all this madness? And I have more clients to get set up with this software including client/server configurations.

Now I'm hearing that there may be more people switching to this software that will need database conversions. That's a minimum 72 hour work weekend (and it has to be weekend so it's ready to go on Monday) with three hours of sleep because the software they're converting from is a warmed over, put into a window shell old DOS program written in Clipper using the old FoxPro database which does not line up the columns with any accuracy. It's a line-by-line, column-by-column conversion.

And I can't wait for the heartache that will come with updating for ICD-10 in another 1.5 years.

Yea, I know, I shouldn't complain, it's a paycheck. But it hurts so bad and my brain will be melted before it's over because I have to work with complicated software programmed by committee.

[jennvan]

This is exactly why I got out of the computer industry. IT SUCKS SO BAD. Money isn't enough for me to do that job anymore. I can make money doing anything else. :)

[Blackmarch]

profanity is the language programmers know best.

[Guest]

CLIPPER??? FOXPRO????

I was like... 14 when I programmed in those! Wearing fingerless lace gloves, big hair stiffened with Aquanet, and neon tights under black miniskirt and a pair of high-top converse.

Don't blame the computers. Don't blame the programmers even. If the company sucks so bad they can't even get out of Clipper, programmers have no motivation to do quality anything... they're just treating it like another paycheck just like you.

Somebody in top management needs to be taken out of his/her corner office.

[Mahone]

profanity is the language programmers know best.

How true is that. Not just programmers, but anyone who works in IT.

Unfortunately, a lot of my job involves implementing hacks (some of them quite dirty) and workarounds in order to -make- things work how they were supposed to in the first place. This is for both hardware and software, but mostly the latter.

The network I help maintain is now jam packed full of various VB/batch scripts, group policies, and registry entries that were in theory not supposed to be necessary, but in practice are required to get everything working together.

If only everything just worked out the box as the various software manufacturers claim they do. Many of the smaller software companies never actually test their software in a classic network environment, they simply test it on a single stand alone machine, and then assume it'd work on a network too. But then, we probably wouldn't have a job if they did.

[Dravin]

But then, we probably wouldn't have a job if they did.

There is always PEBKAC errors.

[slamjet]

There is always PEBKAC errors.

Or my favorite ID-10T error. Yea, I took programming classes.

[Dravin]

Or my favorite ID-10T error. Yea, I took programming classes.

I didn't and I know that term, I like it better but when spoken thougt, of course I am kinda the family IT guy so I feel some of the pain of the IT folks.

Edited April 22, 2011 by Dravin

[slamjet]

Families are the worst. I put logmein on all family computers so I can deal with their screw-ups without having to run out of the house so often. Its like when I worked as sound-man. If it sounded horrible, it couldn't be the performers, it was the sound guy. Blame him.

I've gotten pretty ornery with folks over time because they want everything without paying for it, their ID-10T errors fixed NOW because it's the computer's fault and I don't know what I'm doing because they don't know what they're doing.

I'm very much thinking of going back to school and getting a welding cert to try again to get away from this madness.

[Mahone]

Families are the worst. I put logmein on all family computers so I can deal with their screw-ups without having to run out of the house so often. Its like when I worked as sound-man. If it sounded horrible, it couldn't be the performers, it was the sound guy. Blame him.

I've gotten pretty ornery with folks over time because they want everything without paying for it, their ID-10T errors fixed NOW because it's the computer's fault and I don't know what I'm doing because they don't know what they're doing.

Sounds like certain part of our lives are almost identical. You set something up for them as a favour, but slowly realise you have become 24/7 on call IT support for all these devices that you have set up as favours. I actually stopped visiting certain people because every time I went there, I'd get asked to fix something else with one of their computers, as if I don't get sick of having to do that all day. And expect WW3 to start if an icon on the desktop should get moved in the process of said device being fixed...

I also made it a point to not install logmein (or similar) on any computers because then it becomes an excuse for them to call me at any time and expect immediate support, and that way they don't even try to solve problems themselves. Been there, done that. It becomes a second full time job - of course, from their perspective, they don't see all the other family members also asking you for help, so they don't understand what the problem is.

I do enjoy what I do, but not when it's demanded or "expected" of me. I don't tell friends in real life what I do for a living any more either.

</rant>

Ahh, that feels so good.

Edited April 22, 2011 by Mahone

[Dravin]

Sounds like certain part of our lives are almost identical. You set something up for them as a favour, but slowly realise you have become 24/7 on call IT support for all these devices that you have set up as favours.

It's kind like helping someone plant their garden in the spring and then finding out that they expect you to come over and weed it for them. Mostly my favors consist of telling them what security programs to install. Though I'm often finding they don't bother to update them, or keep them running. I'm thinking I need to just make recovery disks.

Them: "Something's broke!"

Me: "You try googling a solution?"

Them: "No."

Me: "Well, you have a recovery disk. Back up your data."

The only problem is it almost causes my physical pain when someone like my sister is talking about nuking her system because she got MS Remover Tool and didn't want to bother looking up a removal guide (I ended up breaking down and removing it for her). On a side note the must frustrating computer thing I ever did was teaching my Mom how to copy and past when I was a teen. Being called in to explain how to do one or the other several times a day for a week or two is hair pulling frustration and repetition.

[Blackmarch]

How true is that. Not just programmers, but anyone who works in IT.

Unfortunately, a lot of my job involves implementing hacks (some of them quite dirty) and workarounds in order to -make- things work how they were supposed to in the first place. This is for both hardware and software, but mostly the latter.

The network I help maintain is now jam packed full of various VB/batch scripts, group policies, and registry entries that were in theory not supposed to be necessary, but in practice are required to get everything working together.

If only everything just worked out the box as the various software manufacturers claim they do. Many of the smaller software companies never actually test their software in a classic network environment, they simply test it on a single stand alone machine, and then assume it'd work on a network too. But then, we probably wouldn't have a job if they did.

Lol so true!

[slamjet]

Pretty much sums up the type of user's we're up against:

[Mahone]

It's kind like helping someone plant their garden in the spring and then finding out that they expect you to come over and weed it for them. Mostly my favors consist of telling them what security programs to install. Though I'm often finding they don't bother to update them, or keep them running. I'm thinking I need to just make recovery disks.

Them: "Something's broke!"

Me: "You try googling a solution?"

Them: "No."

Me: "Well, you have a recovery disk. Back up your data."

That probably wont work either. They will have most likely installed a program or two since you made the recovery disc, and when they find they can no longer access these programs, and can't find the CD the program came on (down the back of a drawer somewhere), guess who gets blamed and called for support...

The only problem is it almost causes my physical pain when someone like my sister is talking about nuking her system because she got MS Remover Tool and didn't want to bother looking up a removal guide (I ended up breaking down and removing it for her).

My dad was the worst for this kind of thing. In the end, I wiped windows off of his laptop, and put linux on there. Only one problem since then, and that was when he purchased some software that was designed to run on windows only.

On a side note the must frustrating computer thing I ever did was teaching my Mom how to copy and past when I was a teen. Being called in to explain how to do one or the other several times a day for a week or two is hair pulling frustration and repetition.

I had to teach my mum how to use excel, including formulas. Her eyes glazed over when I tried to explain how to enter a formula to work out the equivalent percentage of a fraction ( e.g. =(100/a2)*a1 ). Our lessons stopped after that. It's not that she doesn't know the maths. She just doesn't understand it when done on the computer for some reason.

[Dravin]

That probably wont work either. They will have most likely installed a program or two since you made the recovery disc, and when they find they can no longer access these programs, and can't find the CD the program came on (down the back of a drawer somewhere), guess who gets blamed and called for support...

The key is I would have absolved my conscience. Since I'm moving over 1000 miles away it'll be easier as they aren't the type to have me walk them through something, they're the type who just hands me the computer.

My dad was the worst for this kind of thing. In the end, I wiped windows off of his laptop, and put linux on there. Only one problem since then, and that was when he purchased some software that was designed to run on windows only.

I wish I could convince my Mother to go Linux, my sister too. The only things they do are surfing and emailing, possibly some light office program work (but hello Open Office). The thing is she (my Mom) buys PopCap games and the like.

Our lessons stopped after that. It's not that she doesn't know the maths. She just doesn't understand it when done on the computer for some reason.

More on the subject of painful attempts to help, one lesson I have learned:

Never, ever, ever back up and nuke someone's system for them. I will nuke it for you if you ask nicely enough, but it is your job to back-up the data. To many experiences of asking people what they need backed-up and getting a vapid stare back. Your data your responsibility, I'm not gonna let you chew me out because you lost a family recipe because it wasn't in "My Documents" like you told me everything you wanted backed up was*.

*My Dad had a refresher in this a couple weeks ago when he set up Mozy Home to do back-ups for my Mom. When she nuked her computer she found her family history file hadn't been backed up. She would have been down and out a decade or more of family history work except a copy was found on one of the thumb drives floating around the house.

Edited April 23, 2011 by Dravin

[WardClerk]

I own an IT company and everything you said is part of the nightmare. The one I love is when people call you up and act like they are actually concerned about how your life is...then here is comes...."I have a quick question for you". Right then in there, I tell them I have to go, I am late for a project meeting.

After a while they get the hint. If I can I tell them to RTFM ( Read the **fantastic** manual ).

[Dravin]

If I can I tell them to RTFM ( Read the **fantastic** manual ).

Indeed. It was funny, once while messing with MLS for the EQ (I was secretary) they where wondering out-loud if it could do a certain type of report...

Them: I wonder if it will do X report?

Me: Dunno, let's see... *open help files*

Me: Yes, all we need to do is...

Them: *Staring at me like I'd just cracked Egyptian without the Rosetta stone.*

[MarginOfError]

um...what's MLS?

I can't really share in your frustration. I tell people I'm a statistician and they stop talking to me. They have no idea where to go with it. Occasionally I'll get a call though from someone who, "needs help with stats." I ask them what they need and it's usually something like, "How many people in the US have diabetes?"

Yup, that's what I went to grad school for.

[Dravin]

um...what's MLS?

Member and Leader Services.

[Mahone]

Indeed. It was funny, once while messing with MLS for the EQ (I was secretary) they where wondering out-loud if it could do a certain type of report...

Them: I wonder if it will do X report?

Me: Dunno, let's see... *open help files*

Me: Yes, all we need to do is...

Them: *Staring at me like I'd just cracked Egyptian without the Rosetta stone.*

Lol, I was lucky when learning MLS, because the ward clerk (I was assistant ward clerk) worked for the church department that designed the software and he was in charge of training ward clerks across the world on how to use it.

[Mahone]

um...what's MLS?

I can't really share in your frustration. I tell people I'm a statistician and they stop talking to me. They have no idea where to go with it. Occasionally I'll get a call though from someone who, "needs help with stats." I ask them what they need and it's usually something like, "How many people in the US have diabetes?"

Yup, that's what I went to grad school for.

I must admit, you're the only person I know either in person or online that is a statistician.

[slamjet]

um...what's MLS?

That nightmare of an excuse for a piece of software that continues to get bloated to the point that no church requisitioned computer will ever be able to run it with any sense of speed let alone the database is so fragile that one miss-step and the whole thing explodes in your face let alone the church has changed it's accounting practices for the church units to make it more idiot proof which made the software even more of an idiot than the worst doctor I tried to show how to run a simple piece of software (Microsoft Word 2003) for when you call tech support to try to figure out why it's not working for no good reason all you get is a comp-sci student at BYU on the line to supposed help you out when they themselves are beyond clueless as to where the power button is on the computer let alone how to answer the dog-gone phone.

Yes, the church is true because if it wasn't, the MLS software would have killed it long ago.

[slamjet]

Lol, I was lucky when learning MLS, because the ward clerk (I was assistant ward clerk) worked for the church department that designed the software and he was in charge of training ward clerks across the world on how to use it.

Read my post above and give me his address so I can go slap him.

[Mahone]

I own an IT company and everything you said is part of the nightmare. The one I love is when people call you up and act like they are actually concerned about how your life is...then here is comes...."I have a quick question for you". Right then in there, I tell them I have to go, I am late for a project meeting.

After a while they get the hint. If I can I tell them to RTFM ( Read the **fantastic** manual ).

Some other common phrases that might put you on alert:

"While you're here..."

"I know you're busy, but..."

"Before you leave..."

"I know you're on your lunch break, but..."

"You're good with this techno stuff aren't you?"

[Mahone]

all you get is a comp-sci student at BYU on the line to supposed help you out when they themselves are beyond clueless as to where the power button is on the computer let alone how to answer the dog-gone phone.

They use BYU computer science students as cheap tech support?