Service

[martybess]

I've been thinking about the definition of service and why we as members seem for the most part to struggle with it. You know when were asked to do something other then our callings like drive the youth to youth conference or help the quorum repair a widows roof. It seems the early saints were asked to do and sacrifice much to build the kingdom. (BTW is there a difference between sacrifice and service?). We all know ppl who are first to sign up for these types of things but why do they? Why don't I? What's the key factors that motivates them? I don't think we can say it's righteousness because I know plenty of good ppl who are less active or non-membes who serve allot. I look at these ppl with so much respect and say "He or she sure is a good person" even though the my not keep the commandments. It makes me wonder just how Christ will look upon them at judgment day verses me.

[applepansy]

I've been thinking about the definition of service and why we as members seem for the most part to struggle with it. You know when were asked to do something other then our callings like drive the youth to youth conference or help the quorum repair a widows roof. It seems the early saints were asked to do and sacrifice much to build the kingdom. (BTW is there a difference between sacrifice and service?). We all know ppl who are first to sign up for these types of things but why do they? Why don't I? What's the key factors that motivates them? I don't think we can say it's righteousness because I know plenty of good ppl who are less active or non-membes who serve allot. I look at these ppl with so much respect and say "He or she sure is a good person" even though the my not keep the commandments. It makes me wonder just how Christ will look upon them at judgment day verses me.

1. Service is never convenient. If it is convenient it certainly doesn't qualify as sacrifice.

2. Sacrifice can be service, but it can also be something personal that doesn't involve helping someone else.

3. (see bold) I believe Christ loves them and they will have the chance to accept the gospel prior to judgement day (or rather the day of mercy).

[skippy740]

I think there's a difference between "organized service" and "impromptu service".

For example: "Organized service" could be like an Eagle service project of some kind. "Mormon Helping Hands" is a good example. (I admit to never volunteering for a project like this - yet.)

"Impromptu service" is usually need-based. For example, there was a woman in our ward who fell in her home one night. We finally got a call from her home teachers who were out of the state. We went to her home, was able to get through a window and get her the help to get up.

Her house was a complete mess. It had the smell of "too many cats". We should've worn protective gear and masks in that home. There was too much clutter and trash. Dishes weren't done (I had to climb through the kitchen window to get in). Cobwebs everywhere and just a completely unsanitary living condition for anyone.

This woman needs help - whether she wanted it or not. No one should be living in such a way.

Now, I didn't impose myself. We worked through my aunt who knew her quite well. We're starting one step at a time. But she needs help and seems open to help from my family (since we already saw her home and her living conditions - and she would rather keep her conditions to herself and not involve the entire Relief Society and risk "losing face").

Now, I'm not going to compare the two types of service. But if I told you that we need to "mobilize the troops" to help this woman who just can't take care of herself for a while, I think more people would be more apt to volunteer. It's household cleaning, and it's true service to those in our ward.

"Organized service" is all great, but it seems to be more "PR" than service? That may just be me, but sometimes that's what it feels like.

[applepansy]

skippy I agree. Sometimes the organized service does feel like PR.

I think its wonderful what you are doing for the lady in your ward. Health issues can lead to mental issues or visa versa which then leads to the kind of living conditions you described. I think its great that you're willing to go in there and help out as much as you can. I know she needs more but what you're doing is true meaningful service.

I really believe its the anonymous, one-on-one, or prompted-by-the-Spirit service that really counts the most. Like VTs seeing dishes needing to be done and just doing them regardless of protests. That's the things that count the most.

[martybess]

I think there's a difference between "organized service" and "impromptu service".

For example: "Organized service" could be like an Eagle service project of some kind. "Mormon Helping Hands" is a good example. (I admit to never volunteering for a project like this - yet.)

"Impromptu service" is usually need-based. For example, there was a woman in our ward who fell in her home one night. We finally got a call from her home teachers who were out of the state. We went to her home, was able to get through a window and get her the help to get up.

Her house was a complete mess. It had the smell of "too many cats". We should've worn protective gear and masks in that home. There was too much clutter and trash. Dishes weren't done (I had to climb through the kitchen window to get in). Cobwebs everywhere and just a completely unsanitary living condition for anyone.

This woman needs help - whether she wanted it or not. No one should be living in such a way.

Now, I didn't impose myself. We worked through my aunt who knew her quite well. We're starting one step at a time. But she needs help and seems open to help from my family (since we already saw her home and her living conditions - and she would rather keep her conditions to herself and not involve the entire Relief Society and risk "losing face").

Now, I'm not going to compare the two types of service. But if I told you that we need to "mobilize the troops" to help this woman who just can't take care of herself for a while, I think more people would be more apt to volunteer. It's household cleaning, and it's true service to those in our ward.

"Organized service" is all great, but it seems to be more "PR" than service? That may just be me, but sometimes that's what it feels like.

So Skippy, "I'm fixing the widows roof because I'm the elders quorum president and it's my duty" verses "I want to help her fix her roof but can't do it myself so I will ask for help from the quorum". Is there a difference between these to thoughts in the Lords eye? Both may come across as PR when presented in quorum meeting.

[martybess]

It's easy to build something up in our minds into some big thing when it isn't - I do a lot of babysitting as an example. It used to drive me nuts to have other people's kids running around messing up the house getting into everything... after years of babysitting, I don't mind it as much anymore, an even actually enjoy it - it's all a mindset, if you see it as a chore, or if you see it as something fun... like reading a book, if you have to read the book for a class vs. want to read the book for fun - I think there is a mindset shift that can take place, if you look at something as being fun rather than being a chore...

I think service is huge in God's book... if you love me, feed my sheep - help one another - and the greatest commandment is to love one another, and we show love through service... if the greatest commandment is to love (serve) one another, then perhaps that is the most important one to keep... active/inactive/smoker/non - I think those who serve the most will be the ones who are the highest up on the totem pole in God's mind... jmo.

You make a great point! In my minds eye it's just to much to ask of me but really it could be that I do have the time but I'm selfish with my time. What am I going to do with my time? Watch a football game? I do this all the time. My wife on the other hand has a extremely demanding job, is the RS president and volunteers for everything and thinks it sounds fun. IS SHE CRAZY!!

[skippy740]

So Skippy, "I'm fixing the widows roof because I'm the elders quorum president and it's my duty" verses "I want to help her fix her roof but can't do it myself so I will ask for help from the quorum". Is there a difference between these to thoughts in the Lords eye? Both may come across as PR when presented in quorum meeting.

To me, it's all about how you motivate others to participate.

For this situation, if I were the EQ president needing the help of others, I'd probably say something like this:

"Brethren, we have a situation within our ward boundaries and we need to organize ourselves to help her. This sister needs some help. We need to help to clean up her home. The more of us there are, the lighter the workload for everyone. It'll probably only take us a couple of hours, but this sister really needs some help and I think by helping her get a "jump start" again with a clean home, it'll really help. If we can get at least 5 of us to help out, we'll be able to do a lot of work in a short time."

To me, it wasn't about "duty" or "fulfilling a calling". It's seeing a need and getting it done.

[martybess]

I think there's a difference between "organized service" and "impromptu service".

For example: "Organized service" could be like an Eagle service project of some kind. "Mormon Helping Hands" is a good example. (I admit to never volunteering for a project like this - yet.)

"Impromptu service" is usually need-based. For example, there was a woman in our ward who fell in her home one night. We finally got a call from her home teachers who were out of the state. We went to her home, was able to get through a window and get her the help to get up.

Her house was a complete mess. It had the smell of "too many cats". We should've worn protective gear and masks in that home. There was too much clutter and trash. Dishes weren't done (I had to climb through the kitchen window to get in). Cobwebs everywhere and just a completely unsanitary living condition for anyone.

This woman needs help - whether she wanted it or not. No one should be living in such a way.

Now, I didn't impose myself. We worked through my aunt who knew her quite well. We're starting one step at a time. But she needs help and seems open to help from my family (since we already saw her home and her living conditions - and she would rather keep her conditions to herself and not involve the entire Relief Society and risk "losing face").

Now, I'm not going to compare the two types of service. But if I told you that we need to "mobilize the troops" to help this woman who just can't take care of herself for a while, I think more people would be more apt to volunteer. It's household cleaning, and it's true service to those in our ward.

"Organized service" is all great, but it seems to be more "PR" than service? That may just be me, but sometimes that's what it feels like.

Wow I have allot to work on. I tend to look down on folks like this even though I should not. I tend to think "You can not be so lazy, I will try and help but I think your always going to be like this because I've seen it before, I'm probably wasting my time". Yes I'm being hard on myself but that's ok with me. I'm not hiding anything from the Lord. Really the Lord will be pleased with our concern and service, weather they change or not.

[MorningStar]

I think there are many factors that make it difficult to serve:

Money - People might work multiple jobs to make ends meet

Time - Between work, children, and trials such as taking care of an elderly or sick

relative, that can leave very little time for extra service.

Callings - Some of them take a lot of time as it is and it's hard to take even more time away from your family.

Health - Often people are physically not able to do the service needed due to back problems and other ailments. And I know a lot of people who would rather keep those issues private.

I tend to go through cycles where I help a lot and then I help a little (except I'm always doing something music related). Sometimes I can't bring someone dinner because I don't have the money, but I might be able to make lunch for a new mom. I can't always afford to bring a meal to a family of six. Years ago when things were really tight, my VT companion asked me to make some brownies for the sisters we taught and I couldn't because we literally had 75 cents in our account.

When our children were very small, my husband worked sometimes 25 hours of overtime per week, making me unavailable to help someone with cleaning for a move and other things because I had to take care of my kids, or I had a nursing baby, my chronic illness flared up due to sleep deprivation, etc. My husband could rarely take a day off even to fulfill his Scout calling (they would leave sometimes early on a Friday for a campout and we couldn't afford for him not to get his overtime hours). Others in our ward have lots of vacation and are more able to donate time.

Most likely, those not giving service on top of their callings, home teaching, VT are doing plenty that we don't know about.

[Jennarator]

I think there are many factors that make it difficult to serve:

Money - People might work multiple jobs to make ends meet

Time - Between work, children, and trials such as taking care of an elderly or sick

relative, that can leave very little time for extra service.

Callings - Some of them take a lot of time as it is and it's hard to take even more time away from your family.

Health - Often people are physically not able to do the service needed due to back problems and other ailments. And I know a lot of people who would rather keep those issues private.

I tend to go through cycles where I help a lot and then I help a little (except I'm always doing something music related). Sometimes I can't bring someone dinner because I don't have the money, but I might be able to make lunch for a new mom. I can't always afford to bring a meal to a family of six. Years ago when things were really tight, my VT companion asked me to make some brownies for the sisters we taught and I couldn't because we literally had 75 cents in our account.

When our children were very small, my husband worked sometimes 25 hours of overtime per week, making me unavailable to help someone with cleaning for a move and other things because I had to take care of my kids, or I had a nursing baby, my chronic illness flared up due to sleep deprivation, etc. My husband could rarely take a day off even to fulfill his Scout calling (they would leave sometimes early on a Friday for a campout and we couldn't afford for him not to get his overtime hours). Others in our ward have lots of vacation and are more able to donate time.

Most likely, those not giving service on top of their callings, home teaching, VT are doing plenty that we don't know about.

I can see where you couldn't do things and that is a legit "excuse." (I don't like the word excuse, but there really are some.) I have been is some of those same situations and felt bad I couldn't help.

Then there are others that could help but think the fact that it is inconvienent is a good enough excuse. Service is NOT always convienent.

I keep hearing people say that we need to learn to say "no" more often because these "charity situations" take away from doing other things. Of course they do! Why not serve as a family, if possible?

Let me give example:

When I was working full time and single parenting and paying off loans my ex had gotten us into, I was asked to help with a few things in the ward that I could not do. MOstly because I was at work when the service projects were scheduled. I felt bad, but it was not phyisically possible to be in two places at once.

Recently there was a woman in my ward that had a child. This child was pre-mature and the woman was told her child had a slim chance to survive. There were many "stay at home" moms that had time and money to cook a meal for this woman and her husband. (that was working and rushing off to the hospital everyday.) Nobody in the ward even volunteered to take a meal. I did it a few times. It was very inconvienent, but it was needed. I worked all day, came home, cooked the meal for the woman and her husband, packed it up, brought it to them, then rushed to bring dinner to my own husband in a differnt city while he was at work. I did this a few times as NOT ONE other person in the ward brought her a meal. This was a huge ward that was so big it was recently divided.

Please tell me how those other women that didn't want to cook because she has an 18 month at home and didn't want to put them in the car (or stroller) to go a few blocks and take a meal over had more of an excuse to say no when asked to bring a meal than me?

I do think that sometimes we need to say no like when we really can't, but when it's just inconvienent we need to stand up and serve. I know it is hard, but one or two people can't do everything.

I know I don't know all of the circumstances with everyone, however I do know that some could have do it. I heard the excuses and I know the people. I just felt so bad that this owman thoguht her baby was going ot die and there was no support. She confided in me that not even someone from the RS presidency called. And yes, they knew about the situation.

[Dove]

This reminds me of some scriptures in the Book of Mormon that basically say; If you have a lot, give a lot, if you have a little give a little, if you have nothing, or just enough to make it from day to day, don't give, but say in your hear that if you did have, you would give....

I think this is a good thread~From what's being talked about, true service (not being easy, or being inconvenient, being willing to in the moment, being fairly anonymous) is the closest we have to the pure love of Christ....

I'm thinking about opening a thread on what is the "pure love of Christ?" I believe helping others freely and without resentment, just for the "joy" of doing so is a great component of this...

I'm not really active in the church and don't do the organized service asked by the ward either. I used to visit teach when I was more active. I do live in Salt Lake City. There are so many people on the street in need here. I had a person ask me for my food (I had a take out box I was taking home on the bus) , and others ask for money (I tried to give food to that one as well) and for cigarettes every time I light up. I try to give freely what I have on me. I would even give a few extra dollars if I had it to give. I think being in the Spirit of freely giving what we have/can give is so important. Admittedly, sometimes it is overwhelming to me to give, for one reason or another....But I feel the Spirit encourage me to do so, regardless...