Whats the best way to go about getting approvel from the family for baptizing for the dead?

[lizzy16]

So, I have a few more months until its the one year of my friends death however I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Obviously I'll be doing some serious thought and contemplation before I call the mother and talk to her for permission.

Has anyone had to ask a non member for permission to do there familiy membres temple work? How did it turn out? Any advice?

Liz

[Vort]

My sister's friend was killed in a car crash in high school. My mother asked for, and received, permission to do her work after a year. She said something like the following:

"We loved Debbie. We have ordinances we do in our temple to benefit those who have died. It doesn't force anything on them, just gives them the choice of what they want to do. It is our way of honoring and showing our love to those we love who have died. Can I do these temple ordinances for Debbie?"

[lizzy16]

Also, if I got permission from the individual before they died is that okay if the parent says no? My friend died in a fire however he took the missionary discussion and I talked to him about religion a lot and the subject came up. I never imagined it would actually take place though.

The mom likes me however she dislikes the LDS church. (Or so her son told me long ago.)

Liz.

[Vort]

No. A living individual can get baptized. Once he's dead, next of kin get to decide if and when his work is done. Or else wait for a hundred years or so...

[lizzy16]

Well, if I waited 100 years wouldn't his siblings/siblings kids be in charge of making the decision? :)

[skippy740]

Present this as a gift you would like to give in their honor and memory. It's much easier to think of it as a gift for a non-member, than a ceremony or ordinance to "change them" in the afterlife. Something similar to the way that Vort mentioned ought to present your intentions well.

Remember that no matter how well you ask, you might still hear 'no'.

[sister_in_faith]

ooooooo... good question <waiting patiently for everyone else's answers> I know I struggled with wanting to do my boyfriend's family, and he had said no, until a few weeks ago he said yes! that's my good news for the day! but this is a VERY good question, and I look forward to what everyone has to say!

[Madriglace]

Family Search says 70 years ... after that the names are fair game with a few exceptions ... famous people, reserved names etc. I am not sure why we ask permission to do work for the dead from their relatives ... it involves no one but the person who the work is for ... but I guess it is courtesy. I have started several family members without permission because of very strong promptings ... but that's family and they don't want to get into it with me ... I may be 2nd to the end in the family but I am way pushy when I am right.