"Not a bad person"

[JudoMinja]

The problem I have with terms like "bad" and "good" is that they are completely subjective and very non-descript. It's like calling someone "awesome". Sure, you've identified that you think positively about them, but that's it. What exactly does awesome mean? What does it entail? Terms like bad and good work well when identifying a singular thing or act that you can pin down, like- shoplifting is bad or cutting all the hair off "Fluffy" just for kicks is bad, etc. We can easily identify such things and make very natural distinctions between what is good and bad.

However, when you try to use a more wholistic definition like calling someone a "bad person", you've turned the word into a completely useless descriptor- like awesome. This is part of the reason why I believe there are no such things as bad or good people. There are just people who do bad or good things, and we all do a little bit of both.

Now, I believe that the majority of people have a natural desire to choose and do good things, but to do so also requires an effort of will to overcome our baser instincts to just sit and stew and take the path of least resistance which often leads to bad choices. Some find it easier to oercome these base instincts than others, are better at casting off the natural man, while others have a much harder time with it. So, we find some people who do mostly good things and some who do mostly bad, but even so we still cannot call either a good or bad person.

I think that when someone uses a statement like "I'm not a bad person", what they are really trying to say is- "I did not intend to cause anyone harm. I did not have bad intentions. I did not think things through before making my decision so that I could be aware of and avoid the adverse consequences on myself and others. etc." This, however, applies to almost everyone who does something bad so it tells us virtually nothing. What needs to happen for such a person is for them to take the next step toward recognizing their guilt (they recognized that what they did was wrong but are striving to separate themself from the deed as an anomally instead of understanding what led to it), recognizing the path they took, the temptations they fell victim to, and then acting on that information. Seek to make restitution, seek mercy, grace, and repentance, and strengthen their resolve and "armor" so that they do not fall victim to the same weaknesses again.

I don't care what a person has done or how bad the act, deed, choice was. To call the person bad is just wrong and pointless. Identify it for what it is. This person did something wrong, and unless they learn from it, they are going to continue to fall and make the same mistakes. Unless they recognize their need for grace and mercy, they are going to remain stained. It's not about doing more good things than bad- it's not about accumulating points on one side or the other. It's about learning and growing and changing, doing our best to seek out the good things over the bad, overcoming our weaknesses so that we don't keep repeating the same mistakes, and relying on the hand of mercy to make restitution where we cannot.

[Jamie123]

I mean, come on. Sleeping with a married man, when you yourself have promised yourself to someone else -- that's pretty scummy in almost any corner of America.

Hmmm....by "America" do you mean just the USA, or would it be scummy in Canada and Mexico too?

[Dravin]

Hmmm....by "America" do you mean just the USA, or would it be scummy in Canada and Mexico too?

The answer to both questions could just be a simple, "Yes."

[Guest]

The answer to both questions could just be a simple, "Yes."

Well, I don't know... is monogamy the norm in Canada and Mexico?

[Jamie123]

The answer to both questions could just be a simple, "Yes."

Ah well....at least I'm safe here in Merrie Englande!

[Klein_Helmer]

Bobby Petrino passenger Jessica Dorrell 'in safe mode,' friend says - ESPN

Bobby Petrino is the head football coach at Arkansas, a man with vast power within his fiefdom and who gets paid an enormous sum of money ($3,680,000 per year). A husband and father, he recently had a motorcycle accident while carrying as a passenger his 25-year-old girlfriend, herself affianced to a young man for an intended June wedding.

I have no sympathy whatsoever for Petrino. Whatever happens to him will be no more than he deserves, and probably far less. I do have some small amount of sympathy for his mistress, who (we may assume) is less mature and more prone to the foolishness of youth. What I do not understand is this quote from one of her friends, quoted the article linked above, and seemingly ubiquitous in such situations:

"She's not a bad person."

Just wondering: What does one have to do in order to be considered "a bad person"? I understand that the larger world does not consider fornication even to be wrong, but I'm pretty sure that sleeping with a married man (married to someone besides yourself) is still considered A Bad Thing by the majority of the population. And she herself was "in a relationship", engaged to a man with whom I assume she was sharing intimacy.

So what exactly do her friends mean? Do they mean we should not condemn her? I guess I agree with that, but is the implication that we are free to condemn someone who IS "a bad person"? And again, what exactly do you have to do to be considered "bad"? Kill and eat children? Blow up an airplane? Is anything short of murder enough to be considered "a bad person"? How about Proposition 8 supporters -- are they "bad people"? If I merely embezzle a couple million dollars, do I still qualify as "not a bad person"?

I mean, come on. Sleeping with a married man, when you yourself have promised yourself to someone else -- that's pretty scummy in almost any corner of America.

This is a good thread, Vort.

I am looking forward to offering my thoughts when I have a little time.

Here is a preview of my position:

There are bad people, lots and lots of bad people.

[applepansy]

Mosiah 3:19

For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father.

Yes we're all bad.

Yes, we can all repent and put off the natural man.

Then there are those who choose to deliberately hurt other people. Hilter, Charles Manson, Brian David Mitchell - to name a few. I don't think I can say that someone who chooses to hurt others is anything but a bad person. Having said that though I cannot condemn because condemnation is not in my job description. We just don't know what people, who deliberately and will full knowledge hurt others, have experienced in life that influences their choices.