Excommunication and temple blessings.. the whole thing..

[Eleven]

So i gotta question!

My wifes parents are divorced. Her mother remarried to who is now obviously her step father.

Step father has been married before and excommunicated for cheating and alcohol and drugs, and has made a complete full turn around. When he came back, 2 years after getting temple blessings restored he found my wifes mother.. happily ever after.. blahzy blahzy ok

QUESTION

Her mom and step dad are married but ARE NOT sealed. reason being is her mother WANTS to be unsealed to her biological father, BUT DOESNT go through the process because the step fathers ex wife WILL NOT go through the process of a cancellation.

...

Let me throw some random names in here to make some sense..

My mother in law "Kathy" remarried "Steve". They are not sealed because "Steve's" ex wife refuses to be unsealed EVEN THOUGH she has remarried as well. Says to everyone she would take him back if he would come back.

My mother in law "Kathy" wants to be unsealed from her ex husband, but feels that its pointless without "Steves" exwife to cancel their marriage first.... hahaha so confusing i know.

So what Im trying to get at is two final questions lol

1. IF "kathy" goes through the cancellation process anyways.. and "Steve" and his ex wife never get unsealed, Is "Kathy" left in the wind without a spouse?

2. Since "Steve" was excommunicated and all, does is excommunication cancel is sealing by itself? OR, when he got his restoration of temple blessings, was his sealing back on him?

Thank you that is all

[applepansy]

Both have to get a letter from their ex spouse for a sealing cancellation. Unless there is the prospect of being sealed again its unlikely "Kathy" will get a sealing cancellation without the prospect of getting sealed again.

"Steve's" doesn't have to have a sealing cancellation but he does need permission from his 1st wife to be sealed again. Maybe that would help Steve's ex-wife let go a little? If Steve's ex-wife has no prospects of remarrying its unlikely a sealing cancellation would be granted. (Men can be sealed to more than one wife, women can only be sealed to one man. Usually this happens after the death of the first wife when the man remarries. For a widow who was sealed to her first husband she can only be married for time to a 2nd husband.)

It is my understanding that when Steve's temple blessings were restored that would include the sealing too.

However, the best people to ask is their respective Bishops. Its the Bishops of everyone involved who will be doing the interviews and collecting the paperwork, etc., and submitting the paperwork for permission from the 1st Presidency. Their first stop is their Bishop!

Since "Steve's" ex wife doesn't want a cancellation then she probably won't go see her Bishop. But when the process gets started her Bishop will probably call her in after he receives the paperwork or a call from the other Bishop. Her feelings are complicated. She probably feels abandoned. Often its very hard to forgive and let go. Her Bishop can help her through some of those feelings.

This whole process can take years

[Dravin]

My mother in law "Kathy" wants to be unsealed from her ex husband, but feels that its pointless without "Steves" exwife to cancel their marriage first.... hahaha so confusing i know.

Well she's wrong, Steve can be sealed to both his ex-wife and Kathy. And I presume here you mean sealing and not marriage.

1. IF "kathy" goes through the cancellation process anyways.. and "Steve" and his ex wife never get unsealed, Is "Kathy" left in the wind without a spouse?

As just mentioned above Kathy can be sealed to Steve even though he's sealed to his ex-wife. The fact that Steve is still sealed to his ex-wife is not a bar to Kathy being sealed to him.

Edited August 1, 2012 by Dravin

[Wingnut]

Steve doesn't need a sealing cancellation -- just a clearance.

Neither spouse needs permission from their ex in order to have their sealings cancelled/cleared. The First Presidency can grant that whether the other has given permission or not.

[Eleven]

So If i can collect this correctly..

Steve can be sealed to two LIVING women, but because of polygamy issues.. he cant be married to them both? That seems confusing. Its like instating polygamy, the only time Ive ever heard of anyone being able to be sealed to two spouses is if one of them had pasted away, though the church advises that they cancel the other.

So say Kathy does this, and gets sealed to steve despite the past wife not willing to comply. Does Steve and these two women die and go to heaven and Steve has two wives? Or will it be his choice as to who he pulls through the "pearly gates"?

I want to ask another, Steve's ex wife IS REMARRIED to another man, but refuses to cancel her sealing with steve.

If Steve went through the process and everything waiting on Steves ex wife, would the presidency or local leaders prod her to cancel and be sealed to the man shes married to, as opposed to holding onto the past?

thanks for the the insight. My wifes mother seems troubled about her standing in heaven. She DOES NOT love her ex husband, and If nothing was done in this world to change who's sealed to who, she says she would decline the ex husband if he wanted to bring her through, even if it meant no Celestial Kingdom.. BUT lets be honest, the ex husband is less active and hasnt had a temple recommend in a long time, so Im not trying to judge, but there could be a small chance he just doesnt make it at all because of procrastination.

let me know, again thanks

[Vort]

When we talk of sealings, we talk of being "bound". But that's not "bound" in the sense of "handcuffed". Sealings are familial bonds, not shackles.

A man may indeed be sealed to multiple women. What does that mean in the next life? I'm not sure. It might mean that he has two wives. Maybe it means something else. But it really doesn't matter. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof. I don't know how things are structured in the next life, but however it's done, I am confident it will be just and we will be happy with it.

[Traveler]

So If i can collect this correctly..

Steve can be sealed to two LIVING women, but because of polygamy issues.. he cant be married to them both? That seems confusing. Its like instating polygamy, the only time Ive ever heard of anyone being able to be sealed to two spouses is if one of them had pasted away, though the church advises that they cancel the other.

So say Kathy does this, and gets sealed to steve despite the past wife not willing to comply. Does Steve and these two women die and go to heaven and Steve has two wives? Or will it be his choice as to who he pulls through the "pearly gates"?

I want to ask another, Steve's ex wife IS REMARRIED to another man, but refuses to cancel her sealing with steve.

If Steve went through the process and everything waiting on Steves ex wife, would the presidency or local leaders prod her to cancel and be sealed to the man shes married to, as opposed to holding onto the past?

thanks for the the insight. My wifes mother seems troubled about her standing in heaven. She DOES NOT love her ex husband, and If nothing was done in this world to change who's sealed to who, she says she would decline the ex husband if he wanted to bring her through, even if it meant no Celestial Kingdom.. BUT lets be honest, the ex husband is less active and hasnt had a temple recommend in a long time, so Im not trying to judge, but there could be a small chance he just doesnt make it at all because of procrastination.

let me know, again thanks

I believe you are over thinking this - for several reasons. First is because this is not "your" problem and the resolution of it does not require your input. Second you need to exercise faith that G-d is good and that being obedient to his counsels is good.

In this life we are given the opportunity to make covenants that will later be established or completed in the resurrection. In essence we are not married for eternity until the resurrection - but rather we covenant in this life that we may be resurrected according to the atonement of Christ and our covenants - including the trials of our covenants. Only after our covenant of marriage is sealed by the Holy Ghost will it have effect in eternity.

The Traveler

[Eleven]

I believe you are over thinking this - for several reasons. First is because this is not "your" problem and the resolution of it does not require your input. Second you need to exercise faith that G-d is good and that being obedient to his counsels is good.

In this life we are given the opportunity to make covenants that will later be established or completed in the resurrection. In essence we are not married for eternity until the resurrection - but rather we covenant in this life that we may be resurrected according to the atonement of Christ and our covenants - including the trials of our covenants. Only after our covenant of marriage is sealed by the Holy Ghost will it have effect in eternity.

The Traveler

.....

lol That didnt really answer anything i made this thread about.. Im not over thinking anything, i just state the extremes to help paint the true picture of whatever opinion is being given.

Honestly, i think your overthinking and going too deep into what i was asking lol.

all i asked was if your sealing was included when temple blessings are restored and what would happen to my mother in law if she went through the process with the ex. Everything you just stated was information everyone knew was already implied. Thanks though:D

[grauchy123]

Whenever these complex questions of who ends up with who in the afterlife arise, I can't help thinking about the words of Jesus Christ. He responded to a very similar question on complicated marital relationships and how they will be resolved in the afterlife.

Question to Jesus: "Therefore in the resurrection whose wife shall she be of the seven?"

Read his response in Matthew 22:24-33

Matthew 22:24-33