Totally Ignorant About Primary...


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I was just called to teach Valiant 8/9, but I was never in Primary because I didn't grow up in the church. I have no idea what the kids are expecting from a class, or what a successful class looks like. I don't have kids old enough to be in Primary - just a 5-month-old. And I've never really known anyone who taught Primary. The Presidency didn't really introduce me to it (my first class was the day of my daughter's baby blessing and I was late getting to class), I had to just sort of go into my classroom and wing it. I had the book beforehand and everything, so I had prepared the lesson to the best of my abilities, but I've never taught kids, especially not 8&9 year olds.

They're not old enough that I can just have a conversation with them, ask them to find Scriptures, or many of the other things that happen in the adult classes, but they're not young enough that I can talk to them like little kids. They don't focus well and there are a few kids, one in particular, that just won't sit down and be quiet, no matter how many times I tell them. There has been paper airplane throwing, writing "butt" in the chalkboard dust, turning chairs upside down and sitting on them, yelling, deliberately repeating things I tell them to stop doing or saying...I just, truthfully, don't understand how or why some of these things are issues. How do they think this behavior is appropriate in the first place? I try to be nice and pleasant with them, but I feel like I'm just getting steamrolled. During the second half of Primary they're better but often disruptive, and I feel like it has to be obvious that I have no idea what I'm doing, but everyone disappears after Primary is over and I don't feel like there's anyone there I can talk to about this. It's embarrassing how bad it is.

Long story short, can anyone tell me a little (or a lot) about what Primary was like (or is supposed to be like) and what these kids are expecting from me? How do I get them to sit down and be reverent without spending the entire class repeating it? My husband suggested sending kids who commit the same misbehavior repeatedly to sit with their parents in their classes. Is this effective, or does this result in confrontation? Or both? Help...

Edited by cecilyhallward
grammatical mistakes
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First, I admire your willingness to serve - not everyone is. One suggestion is to talk to the Primary president and let her know where you're coming from and what's going on (you can always call her at home if you can't catch her during the last hour). You can also have the kids decide on class rules and consequences (if they help with it - they're more invested in it) - which would include bringing parents in to sit with them! I disagree that the kids are too young to converse with or look up scriptures. It may take longer but they need the practice. It also gets them more involved. As far as class itself, I like to start each week by getting to know them and trying to connect (asking them how their week was, what sports they like, etc) then have the lesson (with plenty of visuals and activities and music if possible - kids learn in different ways) and end with a game that reinforces the lesson (tic-tac-to, jeopardy, wheel of fortune, etc). Have it understood that the game is dependent on their reverence and participation (if you have to keep repeating yourself, there won't be time left). There's a manual "Teaching, No Greater Call" on lds.org with lots of information and ideas. Hope things turn around for you soon - hang in there!

Edited by notquiteperfect
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I was just called to teach Valiant 8/9, but I was never in Primary because I didn't grow up in the church. I have no idea what the kids are expecting from a class, or what a successful class looks like. I don't have kids old enough to be in Primary - just a 5-month-old. And I've never really known anyone who taught Primary. The Presidency didn't really introduce me to it (my first class was the day of my daughter's baby blessing and I was late getting to class), I had to just sort of go into my classroom and wing it. I had the book beforehand and everything, so I had prepared the lesson to the best of my abilities, but I've never taught kids, especially not 8&9 year olds.

They're not old enough that I can just have a conversation with them, ask them to find Scriptures, or many of the other things that happen in the adult classes, but they're not young enough that I can talk to them like little kids. They don't focus well and there are a few kids, one in particular, that just won't sit down and be quiet, no matter how many times I tell them. There has been paper airplane throwing, writing "butt" in the chalkboard dust, turning chairs upside down and sitting on them, yelling, deliberately repeating things I tell them to stop doing or saying...I just, truthfully, don't understand how or why some of these things are issues. How do they think this behavior is appropriate in the first place? I try to be nice and pleasant with them, but I feel like I'm just getting steamrolled. During the second half of Primary they're better but often disruptive, and I feel like it has to be obvious that I have no idea what I'm doing, but everyone disappears after Primary is over and I don't feel like there's anyone there I can talk to about this. It's embarrassing how bad it is.

Long story short, can anyone tell me a little (or a lot) about what Primary was like (or is supposed to be like) and what these kids are expecting from me? How do I get them to sit down and be reverent without spending the entire class repeating it? My husband suggested sending kids who commit the same misbehavior repeatedly to sit with their parents in their classes. Is this effective, or does this result in confrontation? Or both? Help...

How do I get them to sit down and be reverent without spending the entire class repeating it?

1) You won't. Ever. Period. It's like asking how to have a newborn do surgery, or not wet their diaper. Most kids (neurological disorders excluded*) have about a 15 minte attention span, MAX. Which means, amongst other things that you will be repeating yourself every 10 minutes if you wan them on task, and more like every 5. If you're CHANGING tasks every 15 minutes or so, you'll be fine.

One thing that may help you get your timing down better is to watch kids shows for a bit. At home. Look at their timing. Magic School Bus to Zaboomafoo... They're changing things up every few minutes. While some people like to chicken & egg this bit (saying TV creates the timing, instead of children's programming spending zillions researching what keeps kids rapt) a: the timing is true even in cultures without TV, neurophysiologists have studied this enough it's in textbooks, and b: doesn't matter since that's what you've got to work with.

Another thing is to break your lesson up into pieces. A thinking piece, a doing piece, a listening piece, etc. I mostly worked with ADHD kids, so we always had a "get the wiggles out" break between pieces (also our pieces were longer, ADHD has craaaaaaazy attention & focus, we're talking hours at a time when a kid gets hyper focused on something), but when I taught neurotypical kids they also appreciated the break. NOT free for all. Not unless you've got a playground. Once you get kids running in circles and poking each other, that's all she wrote. Day is done, gone the sun, and you've totally got to redirect. Directed motion is pretty key. From toddler games (duck duck goose), to older kid games (theatre sports is perfect for this age group), to yoga/stretches/calesthenics. Red light Greenlight & Teacher May I is good with reestablishing control. (Teacher says, act like a monkey! Teacher says hold your breath!).

There are churchy versions of these games, but I'd frankly save them for later, and stick with what they've been drilled in for years to respond to, because 8/9/10 is also when they start making fun of things that are different/ coming up with their own spoof. Which is dangerous. Because body parts are hilarious at this age ("full eclipse" replaced mooning, thank heavens -aka sticking your bum out like you're mooning, but your pants are coving up the moon). NOTHING is more funny right now than butts. (k is yes/no, 1st is potty humor, etc. This age group is bums and mad libs). You're lucky. Sex humor is slightly younger & slightly older. Just think of it that way. Oh thank goodness, it's just bums and the noises they make!

2) My husband suggested sending kids who commit the same misbehavior repeatedly to sit with their parents in their classes. Is this effective, or does this result in confrontation? Or both? ..

Totally depends on the kind of behavior. If they're just being normal 8&9yos (short attention span, wiggles, having to repeat yourself 10,000 times, etc.), that's like calling parents in to stay for an infant misbehaving for wetting their diaper.

3) Help

My suggestion would be to work your hour (or 2, some wards it's 1 others 2) like this

1. They've just used up all their self control in sacrament, so start off with a game. Get the wiggles out.

2. Opening prayer. Have one of them do it. But don't force in the beginning if they get all shy. Go ahead and do it yourself for the first couple weeks. Then assign.

(I'm randomly assigning Listening / Doing / Thinking, because that's what I usually do, but you can do any order, really).

3. Plan on doing about 10 minutes of reading (that's 3 minutes length in adult time). Have them pass the book. Give directions for your next bit (I'd do drawing or writing) but if they're squirrelly, do a game first. If not, let them draw. (Have an example or 3).

4. Game time.

5. Lesson Q&A. Get talking. Do a 60 second Shakespeare of the entire lesson FIRST. Most will have forgotten what you taught without prompting, otherwise. Not TOTALLY forgotten, They just need a reminder. But the cliff notes version ahead of time will save you from the sea of blank faces.

6. Closing prayer. Ditto, have them do it.

If it's a 2hour segment, rinse, lather, repeat.

Q

Edited by Quin
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Long story short, can anyone tell me a little (or a lot) about what Primary was like (or is supposed to be like) and what these kids are expecting from me? How do I get them to sit down and be reverent without spending the entire class repeating it? My husband suggested sending kids who commit the same misbehavior repeatedly to sit with their parents in their classes. Is this effective, or does this result in confrontation? Or both? Help...

Let me start by saying the behavior you are experiencing with the children of your class is normal. At that particular age group, even though they can be kind and helpful they can also be disruptive, changing moods quickly, they can be "rude" and very impatient. Unless there are children with special needs in your class, they should all be able to understand most of the things you explain (age appropriate) in class. They also understand rules and what is appropriate behavior versus inappropriate (which doesn't equal to our adult "right" vs. "wrong") and they are now starting to become a little more responsible. Their cognitive development in this age group, is strongly connected with whether or not they feel supported and loved and how their self-esteem is.

I would suggest to get to know them individually and ask the Primary President if there are any children in your class who perhaps have special needs. At this particular age, teaching should be fun in order to make the class exciting. Expecting them to sit reverently while you teach your lesson isn't going to bring the kind of results you are perhaps looking for. Sometimes, it is advisable to learn the lesson as a whole, and then put the manual down and create some exciting activities and games where the lesson can be taught.

You could also create a mini-questionnaire where you can ask them thing such as "what is your favorite color?" "What is your favorite game?" "What is your favorite food?" "What are your talents?"What is your favorite subject?" and so on and in this way get to know them, in turn this will help you create lessons that can reach individuals rather than numbers and at the same time, use that opportunity to build self-esteem.

I know, I know, it means lots of more work than you probably have time for but I promise you it will be fulfilling. Love them, when children feel loved and cared for they will go out of their way to help you because they will not want to disappoint you and if they do at some point, they will know that you will always be there for them.

It will take time, but the key is understanding that their behavior is quite normal for their age. You just need to adjust your teaching style. Good luck. :)

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Quinn had lots of great ideas!

I taught the 7/8 year old class - just one down from yours. This age group can read scripture, no problem.

Ok, this is how I organized my class - this dovetails perfectly with Quinn's above.

I don't have an activity longer than 15 mins unless it's stuff like coloring/drawing. My class is run on a routine - the same structure every week so the kids know what to expect every week. I instill discipline through the "work towards a goal" system. I taught the class when those rubber band shapes were popular with the kids. I bought all different shapes of rubber bands and put them in a Tupperware. Then I had star magnets on the board and each of their names. When the class starts and you are present and seated reverently you get a star next to your name. They get stars as the lesson goes along... for example, they get a star if they bring their scripture, they get a star if they can tell me one thing they learned from last week, etc. at the end of the class, they get as many rubber bands from the Tupperware as they have stars.

Okay, on handouts... I don't like giving kids stuff that's just going to end up I the trash... So, I made a scrapbook 3-prong folder for each of the kids. In the folder is as many plastic sheet covers as there are lessons in the manual. In my Primary bag is a bunch of colored papers, crayons, color pencils, stickers, paste, and some cut outs from that week's lesson. As preparation for the lesson, I make my own scrapbook page for the week to use as a guide for the kids.

Ok, now the structure. I'm writing this off the top of my head... It's been a while since I had that calling...

1.). Opening Exercise - 5 mins

- Each kids gets their task assignment (written on the board, it rotates every week)

One kid is assigned for opening prayer, one kid is assigned for closing prayer, another kid to erase the board, another kid to clean up the table, one kid to hand out the folders, etc...

- Wiggly Song if needed

- Opening prayer

2.) Review of Last Week's Lesson - 5 mins

- kids can look through their folder to remind them of last week's lesson

3.). Lesson Introduction - 10 mins

- present the topic and usually, an object lesson is done, and a scripture reading

4.). Lesson proper - 10-15 mins

- lesson discussion. I don't usually follow the outline of the book. I guide the discussion and let the kids talk about it.

5.). Journal - 15-20 mins

- kids create their scrapbook page. The page would have the title of the lesson, the scripture chapter and verse we read, a drawing of something that impressed them in the lesson, and a sentence or two of their own words about the lesson and whatever they want to do to decorate it. The first time they did this, they basically just copied my scrapbook page. After a while they got creative and did their own thing. Afterwards, they put the page in the plastic sheet in their folder and the assigned kid put all the folders in my bag. At the end of the year, I gave all the folders to their parents.

6..) Closing Prayer.

After Closing Prayer, they dig through the Tupperware for their rubber bands and then we walk single file back to the Primary Room.

That's it. 50 minutes of organized lesson. The trick to getting kids under control is to establish a routine, get them engaged in discussion, break up the class so they don't have to sit still for too long, then let them work towards a goal.

Also, doing this, preparation for a lesson becomes really easy because you already have a plan of what to do so you just end up "filling the blanks". And when you need a substitute, you can just hand the structure over to the sub with the blanks already filled out so the sub won't have to worry about what to do to get kids to behave.

Hope this helps.

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