The Tongue of Angels

[Giuseppe]

There were many very good talks at the General Conference of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints last April, but one that i really enjoyed was "The Tongue of Angels" by Elder Jeffrey R. Holland of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles.

This is for husbands:

Husbands, you have been entrusted with the most sacred gift God can give you—a wife, a daughter of God, the mother of your children who has voluntarily given herself to you for love and joyful companionship. Think of the kind things you said when you were courting, think of the blessings you have given with hands placed lovingly upon her head, think of yourself and of her as the god and goddess you both inherently are, and then reflect on other moments characterized by cold, caustic, unbridled words. Given the damage that can be done with our tongues, little wonder the Savior said, "Not that which goeth into the mouth defileth a man; but that which cometh out of the mouth, this defileth a man."

..and this is for wives....

In that same spirit we speak to the sisters as well, for the sin of verbal abuse knows no gender. Wives, what of the unbridled tongue in your mouth, of the power for good or ill in your words? How is it that such a lovely voice which by divine nature is so angelic, so close to the veil, so instinctively gentle and inherently kind could ever in a turn be so shrill, so biting, so acrid and untamed? A woman's words can be more piercing than any dagger ever forged, and they can drive the people they love to retreat beyond a barrier more distant than anyone in the beginning of that exchange could ever have imagined. Sisters, there is no place in that magnificent spirit of yours for acerbic or abrasive expression of any kind, including gossip or backbiting or catty remarks. Let it never be said of our home or our ward or our neighborhood that "the tongue is a fire, a world of iniquity . . . [burning] among our members."

[Jeny]

I have a favorite Quote that I have in the margin of James chapter 3...

If the tongue was not kept behind two gates and doused with water 24 hours a day...it would burn our heads off!!!/rolleyes.gif

I love James chapter 3. It is one of my memory chapters!!/tongue.gif

[Guest Purple Smidgen]

This is my downfall! I've got a mouth like a trucker!!! I want to make some changes in my life...I am going to church with the missionaries this Sunday, they are comming over here today. I have been reading up on this Mormon stuff, and your church really sounds like a really good church...I just feel so out of place!!! How am I EVER going to fit in? Can an old dog REALLY learn new tricks?

[Jeny]

Yes an old dog sure can! I'm 43...I joined this church when I was 40...I am learning every day!!! It does not even seem like three years...it seems like I have been LDS for many years!!! I feel at home and at peace in this church.

[avatar4321]

Yes an old dog sure can! I'm 43...I joined this church when I was 40...I am learning every day!!! It does not even seem like three years...it seems like I have been LDS for many years!!! I feel at home and at peace in this church.

I am positive even President Hinckley is learning everyday. There is always more to learn.

[Jeny]

I am positive even President Hinckley is learning everyday. There is always more to learn.

Spot on!!! B)

[charity]

This is my downfall! I've got a mouth like a trucker!!! I want to make some changes in my life...I am going to church with the missionaries this Sunday, they are comming over here today. I have been reading up on this Mormon stuff, and your church really sounds like a really good church...I just feel so out of place!!! How am I EVER going to fit in? Can an old dog REALLY learn new tricks?

The Gospel is the same for everyone. The culture is what trips us up. We all have to make adjustments to different circumstances we are in. You might not use the same langauge around your mother as you do around your buddies, for instance. You certainly wouldn't go to the office dressed like a day at the beach. Church is the same. We adjust a little for the circumstance. And you can certianly learn new tricks.

[poulsenll]

This is my downfall! I've got a mouth like a trucker!!! I want to make some changes in my life...I am going to church with the missionaries this Sunday, they are comming over here today. I have been reading up on this Mormon stuff, and your church really sounds like a really good church...I just feel so out of place!!! How am I EVER going to fit in? Can an old dog REALLY learn new tricks?

This well worn excuse for failure to change has been debunked numerous times. A few years back many Grandmas started to return to college to either finish what they started years before or to fulfill their lifelong desire to get a college education. At Byu there were numerous examples of Grandma and Granddaughter attending at the same time and taking courses of similar difficulty. As I recall, in all cases the Grandma did better than the grandchild. This was explained by the fact that learning is an incremental process. We learn new things by associating them with similar things we already know. Older people excell because they have a much larger body of experience to call on.

Habits, however, are another thing though. Just as it is hard to get the buggy out of the ruts in a muddy road, it is hard to break out of what may be a lifetime habit. But if we make the effort and succeed, the ride is so much smoother.

Larry P

[Deborah]

This is my downfall! I've got a mouth like a trucker!!!

I think language can change as we are influenced by the spirit. Don't feel bad though. I've let out the s word a couple of times at church, not in the chapel but in some other venue.

Porter Rockwell was pretty rough and tumble, but he was beloved by the prophet Joseph Smith. Peter was a little impetuous when he cut off the guard's ear. We are all human with our faults and weaknesses. But it's the progress we are making that matters and that we are working on becoming better.

[Guest Purple Smidgen]

I think language can change as we are influenced by the spirit. Don't feel bad though. I've let out the s word a couple of times at church, not in the chapel but in some other venue.

Porter Rockwell was pretty rough and tumble, but he was beloved by the prophet Joseph Smith. Peter was a little impetuous when he cut off the guard's ear. We are all human with our faults and weaknesses. But it's the progress we are making that matters and that we are working on becoming better.

Thank you...all of you, for those kind responses. I have been kind of on the fence about this Mormon thing, but I really like the people at church and I like what the missionaries are teaching me...I just don't feel like I will ever measure up. The people i have met seem to have it all together and have such "squeaky clean lives", and mine is such a mess!! I know that sounds like an excuse, but I am really afraid that I will just not be able to live up to the strict standards of your church!! The missionaries are pressuring me to commit to a baptism date and I just keep putting them off, but I am going to church with them...I went three times already. The people are very nice, and I feel very welcome....I just don't know...I'm still scared (for lack of a better word)

PS, Who is Porter Rockwell?

[avatar4321]

Thank you...all of you, for those kind responses. I have been kind of on the fence about this Mormon thing, but I really like the people at church and I like what the missionaries are teaching me...I just don't feel like I will ever measure up. The people i have met seem to have it all together and have such "squeaky clean lives", and mine is such a mess!! I know that sounds like an excuse, but I am really afraid that I will just not be able to live up to the strict standards of your church!! The missionaries are pressuring me to commit to a baptism date and I just keep putting them off, but I am going to church with them...I went three times already. The people are very nice, and I feel very welcome....I just don't know...I'm still scared (for lack of a better word)

PS, Who is Porter Rockwell?

Porter was one of Josephs best friends and a bodyguard for a while I believe.

Do you have faith in Jesus Christ?

[Guest Purple Smidgen]

Porter was one of Josephs best friends and a bodyguard for a while I believe.

Do you have faith in Jesus Christ?

I'm not sure what I believe, I was not really raised in a church...I went a few times as a kid. I guess I believe that there is a God and that Jesus was more than just a man, but I just don't know for sure much beyond that. I do like this church...people seem very sincere...I just don't see myself fitting in with all you "goody goodies" (no offence, I hope!) I would not be here if I were not searching for something better!! I am just scared of all this uncharted territory, that's all...

[Jeny]

I'm not sure what I believe, I was not really raised in a church...I went a few times as a kid. I guess I believe that there is a God and that Jesus was more than just a man, but I just don't know for sure much beyond that. I do like this church...people seem very sincere...I just don't see myself fitting in with all you "goody goodies" (no offence, I hope!) I would not be here if I were not searching for something better!! I am just scared of all this uncharted territory, that's all...

Trust me, my friend...I and none of the rest of us are "goody goodies"!! All our righteousness are as filthy rags before the Lord!! None of us measure up!! You will fit right in!! And as you grow and learn, you will make the changes that need to be made, but it will not happen overnight and you will not be perfect in this life...just believe in Christ and what he did for you and watch your heart and life change!! We are All a bunch of "goof-ups". Paul said that he was the chiefest among sinners!!! Like I said, PS...You are in good company!! Welcome aboard!!!

[Deborah]

PS, Who is Porter Rockwell?

Check out Richard Dewey's biography. I love Porter. He actually reminds me of Peter. He would have given his life for Joseph but he was indeed a diamond in the rough.

[Guest HEthePrimate]

What a good topic! Although "potty mouths" do make me cringe, what makes me feel even worse is when people endlessly criticize each other, gossip, and say hurtful things to each other. Those quotes from "The Tongue of Angels" are excellent. When I first saw the title of your post, I thought it would be about the Adamic language or something (English? (Englisc/angeli) Just kidding!), but this is even better.

DH, HE the Primate

[Jeny]

Check out Richard Dewey's biography. I love Porter. He actually reminds me of Peter. He would have given his life for Joseph but he was indeed a diamond in the rough.

I am reading that book right now!! I love Porter Rockwell...come to think of it...Peter is my favorite apostle, too!! They remind me of my brother!! He is obnoxious, but he has a heart of gold!!! There is no "guessing" which side of the fence he is on...but look out if you speak them "fightin' words"!!!

[MorningStar]

Hi Giuseppe,

This was one of my favorite talks last conference and not because I'm talented at speaking with a tongue of angels. :) It was the main thing I felt like I needed to work on and I think I've made some progress. With my three little, loud boys, I find myself yelling over them and am trying to find alternatives to that when I need them to hear me. There are times when I absolutely have to yell, like when they're about to run into the street and I can't catch them. When they hear me yell, they stop. When I do yell, I add, "Said Mommy angelically." My husband thinks it's hilarious.

[Guest Iggy]

OFF TOPIC - DERAIL

Hi Giuseppe,

This was one of my favorite talks last conference and not because I'm talented at speaking with a tongue of angels. :) It was the main thing I felt like I needed to work on and I think I've made some progress. With my three little, loud boys, I find myself yelling over them and am trying to find alternatives to that when I need them to hear me. There are times when I absolutely have to yell, like when they're about to run into the street and I can't catch them. When they hear me yell, they stop. When I do yell, I add, "Said Mommy angelically." My husband thinks it's hilarious.

Morningstar - do you work in Primary? To get the children to quiet themselves, the leaders calmly walk amongst the children with their forefinger infront of their mouth and say in a bit lower than normal speaking voice: If you can hear what I am saying, stop talking. If you can hear what I am saying, sit down. Repeat until the children are all quiet and are sitting.

To prove that this works anywhere - we did it at an Enrichment Night, and at a Stake Learning Conference. We also did it at our Stake Conference. Can you imagine every single Primary Leader from the Stake, walking calmly among the membership at a Stake Conference. Took 15 minutes for everyone to be quiet and to sit down!!!

What I am getting at is - If Mommy is quiet, and is gently and camly instructing her children to be quiet and still - then it will happen. My mother never yelled at us kids - there were seven of us and we were normal, healthy, loud kids. When she walked into a room or in amongst us - we would be still and quiet to see what she was there for. It took her being calm, and talking to us in a quiet voice and putting her hands on our heads, chins and over our mouths to still us at first. She would do this child by child, softly saying that she needed us to be quiet and to listen. Repeating the same phrase- Mommy needs you to be quiet and to listen.

Try that and save your yelling for the life threatening moments. Also check out this video from the Church Library - dang nabit, lost the name of it. It is by President Hinckley I believe - about children. Excellent video for parents, teachers to see. ALSO babysitters. Something about the love of children, suffer the children, darn,darn,darn! (I hate this Sometimers that I have, it is soooooooo frustrating!) Teach the Child I think is the one.

END OF OFF TOPIC - DERAIL

[MorningStar]

Thanks, Iggy! I've never been in Primary for long and when I have, I don't remember anyone using those techniques. My brother, sister, and I were pretty quiet kids, so with three rowdy boys I haven't had an example in my life of how to handle them. I'll try what you suggested. When I was in primary as a child, there were lots of rowdy boys in my classes and I found myself wondering, "What is wrong with you?" My teachers were doormats and would just take it when one kid was jumping off the table and another sitting on their feet while they were trying to teach the lesson. It was insanity.

Another problem is that my son has such bad allergies, his ears get so much fluid in them, he has a hard time hearing. He failed his hearing screening at school, so we had to take him to the doctor again and she said it was just his allergies. We have him on medicine, but he still doesn't hear as well as he used to. I got so tired of repeating everything loud, I sometimes write it down now that he can read well. The worst was when his ears were severely plugged and I had laryngitis with a really bad cold. He's doing pretty good right now. When he starts getting colds, it will be difficult again, but I will have a pad of paper ready.

My boys are pretty hilarious. They're almost always constantly singing and they even hum when they're eating. My mom used to think it was really cute until she had them over for a long period of time and started to get tired of the noise. When I have to make business calls, I try feeding them lunch to keep them quiet, but it doesn't work. They inherited our musical talents and my ability to project (I'm a singer).