Lost_one

Why am I just hearing about this? You would think there would have been something online about such an awesome event. I'm kidding. I will be watching the last one this weekend and will watch this weekends one during the week, to motivate me for next Sunday.

Thanks Pam. Had a great day with my kids, so very happy.

The gym is quite small and most folks there are down to earth. Even the muscle boys are ok. My ward is also very easy going and took alot of time with my ex and I when we were there last time. I will be going on my own this time, But don't mind, as dispite my lack of social skills I feel very comfortable around them.It's also nice to know that there are other people out there with similar shell issues. I made leaps out of my comfort zone the last time. This time I don't have to worry about someone being jealous of everyone I try to chat with, so that should help alot.

I already know I lack social skills and need to get out of my shell. I just joined the gym and will be going back to church after conference.

Sorry, I fixed that. Not funny really, But true.

I was born on April 1st. Everytime I tell someone my birthday, they always joke "So your an April fool's baby lol", like I never heard that one before.

I know what you mean. I think I really do like this girl and maybe thats my problem. I'm scared of messing it up, But your right. If I don't at least give it a shot, I could regret it later. I rarely regret taking a chance, so the fear has to go.

I do feel ready. Kinda. Sort of. Maybe. I think maybe I'm just worried that I can't do relationships.

I have to agree with prettyrose and Bini. I think you have a man who only cared about owning you. All the lovely stuff in the beginning was about getting to that final goal. Unfortunately these type of guys will go for single mothers, especially religious ones, as they are more likely to desire love and to be more respectful of marriage. All us men can turn on the charm when we want someone, But usually we strip it away within a couple weeks and show our true selves. Abusers can keep up the deception for years. Most victims end up blaming themselves. They remember how wonderful he was in the beginning and wonder what THEY did to make him change. They don't understand that the man in the beginning never really existed and that the monster they now see before them is the real man. I suffered this in reverse. My second wife turned out to be this way, yet until we were married, she was the perfect little Molly Mormon. It was only after we got married that she changed. Once we got sealed in the Temple a year later, she got even more agressive and jealous. I began to hate her too and kept wondering what I had done to make her change and tried to work out how to fix it.

My understanding is that while men fall in love quicker, women fall in love deeper. I hope that made sense. I agree. A man seems to have to "prove himself" then she falls hard.Of course, as with everything, there is always the exception to the rule.

I disagree, But then I would say that huh?

I have always taken the word of wisdom as a starting point, rather than the be all and end all. To me it is about respecting the body that Heavenly Father gave us and not purely about tea, coffee, tobacco and alcohol. Soda pop is very bad for our tummies and teeth. I still drink it, as I am kinda addicted to it, But really want to give it up. Same goes for certain snack foods.

I think most men love to cuddle, I just think we get a bad rep as only caring about sex. As far as I know, most love songs/poems are written by men, so that in itself should tell us something. Just my opinion of course. I have a cat. His name is Kovsky, after the composer Tchikovsky and I don't think he would be very pleased if I got a puppy. Kovsky also likes cuddles from his daddy. :)

I think your right. How much we miss those romantic cuddles will motivate us to get out there and search for that special someone. I also agree that I am in danger of over thinking this and could miss out on something special. If things don't happen between us, at least I will have made another great friend.On a side note. You guys are all nuts. Please never change.

My ex and I were told off once for "having sex" in sacrement meeting. All I did was came in the the chapel, sat down next to her and gave her a peck on the lips. I have to say that my own experience mirrors your own.

Oh isn't that lovely? Yes, that's what I'm doing. I have to figure out if it's worth the risk. Yes, so very vital. There's just nothing that compares to it, is there?

We do, But I'm liking Wingnuts suggestion of it leading to a great friendship. Actually, I felt great about the divorce. While my ex and I were still only seperated, she felt that it was ok to break into my house and take stuff, as we were still married. That made everything in my home ours in her eyes. The divorce has stopped that from happening. This alone makes me not mourn my divorce.I just don't feel that I want a relationship. I also don't trust my judgement when it comes to women in a romantic way. I am a hopeless romantic and that can run away with me. I have been told that so many times. The usual line is "You look like a real man's man, But when you talk it's like talking to another girl". I hate that, But also understand it. My views on sex and cuddling are down to my parents. They gave me a set of books about sex when I was 13/14 (Face2Face) and there was alot of information on how to treat your partner. How to listen, how to communicate, show respect and so forth. Even though the subject matter was about sex, it made sense to do those things in all aspects of a relationship/friendship. I think the reason was more down to her age, rather than her ideas about men only caring about sex. She was 19 when we started dating, I was 28. I only ever dated older women before this, which I feel may also have been a factor to our differant world views.

I'm not really lonely, as such. My day is usually quite full. Evening time is the worst. I guess I fear that my judgement is not very good. The girl really does seem perfect. Her sons even have the same hobby as I do. The saying "To good to be true" keeps coming to mind.Oh! Just to add. Everyones suggestion counts. You took the time to reply to me, it's only right I should value and respect your contribution. So thank you very much. @Dravin: Exactly. Cuddles are lovely, But you need so much more.

A friend of mine from one of my former wards and I were talking. We chat around once a month. She was telling me that a woman she is very good friends with was asking about me. Wanting to know if I was seeing anyone. I met this woman the last time I was visiting my kids and to say we were similar would be an understatement. It got to the point we were finishing each others sentences and even jokes we just made up on the spot. My friend and I giggled a bit and she asked if I thought she was pretty and I had to be honest and say that I thought she was quite beyond pretty. She then asked if I wanted her to set her and I up on a date. I said no. I simply don't want to be in a relationship right now. Yes, the girl seems perfect for me, But I just got out of a very bad marriage, the divorce was only final in october. The thought of another relationship scares me to death. She then asked if I missed certain aspects of marriage. I explained that THAT aspect of marriage was not something I really missed, But kissing and cuddling are something I miss alot. If I tried to kiss and cuddle my ex-wife, she always expected it to lead to the bedroom. As you can imagine, this made showing my ex any kind of love problematic, as she couldn't tell the differance between love and lust. This would lead to lots of jealousy and accusations of me sleeping around with other women and much throwing of cellphones at my rather hard to miss shiny bald head. Women for some reason seem to like my company, so I naturally have mostly female friends. What was this thread supposed to be about again? Oh yeah! Cuddles. Even though I don't miss the more adult aspects of marriage, I really do miss cuddles. Kisses too, But mostly cuddles. The thought of wrapping my arms around my girl and watching a lovely movie just gives me the warm fuzzies. My littlest daughter gives awesome cuddles, But it's not quite the same as cuddling in a romantic way. Am I weird? Am I being silly in passing up this seemingly perfect girl? Only problem is, I thought the last one was perfect too.

I have not been to church in a long time and I'm also excommunicated. I was thinking of going back to church the Sunday after General Conference and I hope to join the Gospel Principal Class. I feel as though I really need it though, as I have forgotten so much. Even though this topic has kinda gone OT, I feel I have to agree with Slamjet. For me it does feel abit like these established members come into the class and make it difficult for someone like me to speak. They almost seem to take over and the whole class is them and the teacher talking back and forth and the rest of us don't get to feel included. I find it difficult to speak in a class, due to really bad shyness and Gospel Pricipals is one of the places I feel I can learn this skill and gain confidence, But not if Brother/Sister Motormouth is there. The fact that I am excommunicated means that this is one of the few classes where I am allowed to give my thoughts and I relish this opportunity very much, so I say this to those long term members who wish to come to the class. Please don't take away this wonderful blessing from people like me, we desperately need it. If you must bear your testimony, please do, But please do it at Fast and Testimony meetings or when you do your visiting teaching.

I'm so sorry you have had to do this. As an excommunicated member, if my bishop told me I was able to get re-baptized on a certain date. I would be camped outside the church. Wild horses wouldn't stop it from happening. When you have had all the blessings of the church and then lose them, you really feel it. That's when I learnt that the church really is true and I blew it big time. I'm glad your taking your baptism seriously enough, that your willing to postpone it until you feel more confident. I personally feel that this will make you a stronger member when you eventually take the plunge.

I used to be very bad and seem to fall back into the habit when I'm around my dad. He can't speak a single sentence without the f word in it. I actually stopped swearing mostly because my middle daughter was getting very bad for it and I felt like a hypocrite telling her off for it, while doing it myself. I can't remember which church president it was, But I remember the story that he washed his sons mouth out with soap for swearing, then one day he was telling a story to a group of friends and he used a swear word. His son pointed this out to him and he agreed that he was wrong and let his son wash his mouth out with soap. That's what got me. I might be mis-remembering the story somewhat, But do remember it having a big impact on me and my foul mouth. It could have been the church presidents father and the son was the church president. Not sure, sorry.

I watch a good movie. If I feel depressed I will go for a comedy. If I'm feeling emotional, I will go for something romantic or a tear jerker. Disney movies are great for however your feeling.

Just to say; If I have to study for a class or have particular scriptures to read, I will use my proper scriptures. I just like listening to the scriptures being read. I also like the idea of listening, while reading along. Listening while reading along, I feel helps me remember better. I do however mostly use the tapes as background noise. If something catches my ear though, I do go to my scriptures and look it up.

You have pretty much said exactly how I feel here. I would love to be white hot for the church, But I also am lukewarm. I will say one thing though. People are imperfect and I really wish I didn't judge the church itself on the actions of imperfect people. As I said in my other thread. My problem is pride and that pride makes me lukewarm.