MisterT

Nothing disgusts me more than a politician who says "I had to vote my conscience on this matter, even though its in direct opposition to the will of my consituancy." Our elected representatives aren't in Washington to vote their conscience; they're there to vote in a manner which represents the desire of those people in their distric who elected them. They're not there to represent the interests of the minority who voted for the other candidate, but solely for the interests of the majority. Plenty of good elected representatives have voted in ways that were in opposition to their own personal views, simply because they understood that their role was to vote in the manner which those who elected them wanted. Unfortunately those people are rare. Harry Reid, well, I didn't even know he was a member. I never would have suspected based upon the absolutely hateful and mean spirited diatribe I've heard come from his mouth. I never in a million years would have believed, had I heard that he was a member, that he would have a Temple Recommend. He doesn't seem the type, to me, to take serious anything other than his own political ambitions and the will of his leftist party. I can't count the number of times I've read him rant about the evils of religious influence on the electorate and things of that nature. Perhaps I've misjudged him. Perhaps he's only representing the views of those who elected him, instead of making personal value statements. Or perhaps he's just a dirt bag and his Bishop and Stake President are bowing to unseen pressure (real or imagined) to not ask really tough questions or require that he live the principles of the gospel. In a Temple Reccomend interview, if the applicant answers the questions correctly, whether or not the Bishop and Stake President know the answers to be false, the recommend is granted. I've seen people at the Temple who only weeks before I saw with my own two eyes smoking marijuana with women who were not their wives. I don't believe that Harry Reid holds any church office; but if he did, it is the right of those in his ward or stake to signify that they are opposed to the calling he received if they feel that there are issues. I've personally objected to a Stake Presidents conformation in California because I had been cheated by him on a business deal; something he was later convicted of and imprisoned. The church takes very seriously objections to a conformation. So my only conclusion must be that either he holds no church office or calling, or he's been misjudged by a lot of us. I personally can't stand the man; I would find it hard to be civil to him no matter where we met, even in the Temple. Of course, its unlikely I'd get within a hundred feet of him, as I'm sure his ward boundaries include very wealthy areas and I don't move in those circles.

Sweet Potatoes it is then! I like porcini or morel mushrooms sauteed in Marsala wine (for cooking only), asparagus wrapped with Serrano Ham (Proscuitto is almost as good), carmelized onions, and Roquefort cheese with my Antelope steaks. A Sweet Potato would fit in quite nicely indeed.

I have some Antelope steaks from a couple Lopes I shot last year... mighty tasty...

I can only tell you about my story of re-conversion. A little more than 10 years ago my ex-wife and I had a child who was born with an extremely rare birth defect that left her missing most of her small intestine (necrotizing entrocolitis and strictures - she has only 90 centimeters left - normal is around 1200) causing an equally rare disease known as "Short gut syndrome." She spent her first 2 years in the ICU; sedated most of the time. She endured nearly 30 major surgeries where bowel was removed and resected. She had an illiostomy (similar to a colostomy, but at the illius instead of the colon), a Broviac IV (a 'central line' IV that is inserted, under flouroscopy, into the ventrical of the heart), a GJ "Mickey Button" feeding tube (surgically inserted through the abdomen into the bowel), and was connected to IV's and feeding tubes 24/7. After 2 years of her being in the ICU we had to leave Arizona and move to Nebraska, where the Intestinal Research and Transplant Hospital was located (The Lied Center). We had to short-sell our home, leave my business, and uproot our eldest daughter from her school. We were welcomed into our new ward with open arms... Well, at least my wife was. I had to commute to Los Angeles so that I could make the kind of money I needed to sustain the medical treatments that were keeping my daughter alive. I was resentful of the neglect I was receiving from the Elders when I was home; or I should say, the lack of anything other than a cursory 'hello.' I began to hate to go to church because I didn't fit in. 6 years ago I stopped going altogether. 2 years ago my wife left me with nothing more than a few dollars and a pillow. I heard nothing from anyone in my ward; nor did I expect to. In December, 2 years after my now ex-wife left me I attempted suicide and spent a month in the hospital. I was sick of living; tired of feeling worthless and unloved. I was reading my e-mail when I left the hospital and there was a link to the LDS website, so for whatever reason I clicked on it. I decided to find out who the Bishop was in the area I was now living, and I called him. I left a message just stating that I was new to the area and wanted to find out about the ward. He returned my call shortly thereafter, and within 5 minutes I had the information I had half-heartedly wanted. Before we hung up, he asked if I'd be at church on Sunday. I gave him my best non-commital "if I'm able," and we ended the call. I went to church that Sunday and briefly shook hands. Nothing more. The next week I couldn't make myself get out of bed, I was so depressed. The third week I went back and the Bishop came over to me and simply asked "how are things with you?" I told him "not too good." He left. In Elders Quorum the Bishop interrupted and asked me to come to his office to meet. He said that he had been impressed by the Spirit to pull me aside immediately; that he was afraid for my life. I began to tell him what had been happening in my life the last 10 years, and he wept. He's my Home Teacher, my friend. He calls me several times a week to ask after my health and welfare. He cares for me the way Christ cared. I can't imagine being without him and the love that my ward unconditionally offers me. I'm repenting for the things I did while I was inactive, and I feel the blessings of Heaven pouring out on my every day. My advise to you is just go back and sit through Sacrament meeting. Talk to the Bishop and tell him about yourself. Cast your worries on him, and he will help you bear their weight.

I don't know if it was a 'bad joke' or not, but it sure was weird... I too belong to PETA, but my organization means "People Eating Tasty Animals."

RUN AWAY I know from personal experience where you are and where this is going. Nothing good can come from this.

This conference was the first time I'd actually sat through all 5 sessions, and the first time I really paid attention to what was being said. In the past I'd kind of stare at the screen and drewel until it was over, then I'd go read a book. This conference I was amazed to find that I was enthralled by the speakers; I not only wanted to pay attention, but I got excited when the Prophet got up to speak. I thought to myself "Here is the Prophet of the Almighty on this Earth! How lucky I am to live in a time where I can simply drive to the Stake Center (I don't own a television set, and I can't stand watching anything over the internet - the audio artifacts drive me nuts) and hear the words of a living prophet, without having to make a pilgrimidge two thousand miles. I felt as though I was being continually kicked in the teeth (in a good way) by the speakers when they talked of "Rescuing" those who have lost their way; I realized that I've been so wrapped up in my own woes the last few years that I'd forgotten that there were people worse off than me; while my life situation is bleak, I do have a roof over my head and food in my belly; something that a number of people in my Stake lack regularly. When Presdient Schwitzer spoke about not judging based upon appearance, I felt terribly ashamed of myself. Recently the Elders had been bringing to church a guy whith obvious limited capacity, brought about by chronic drug abuse many years ago. I had thought to myself "Why are they wasting so much of their valuable time and energy on one who obviously will never fully understand the fullness of the gospel, and will not be able to progress much further than he has already in this life?" And then it struck me as I listened to this divinely inspired man speak; that this man of limited capacity was a child of the Living God; beloved as much as I, and no less deserving of every measure of support, love, and care than myself or the Prophet. I can honestly say I can't wait for General Conference in October; hopefully by then I'll be living in Salt Lake City and will be able to see it in person.

I'm very sorry to hear that. Even if a divorce is right or just, it still hurts unbelievably. I pray that you are comforted during your time of sorrow and lonliness. I hope you have family or close friends with you; being alone as I am, 1,500 miles from my closest relative, in almost unbearable. I've been alone for 2 years now; although my divorce was only final in February (the day before my birthday of all days). It was so painful for me at the beginning that I held a revolver under my chin, and if not for a wooden button on my shirt preventing the hammer from striking the primer, I would have died. My Bishop is not only my Judge in Israel, but he's a very close friend. I was over at his home until late last night, and he was giving me council about a great number of things; all of which I believe were revealed to him by the Spirit. Among those things were that I should worship in the Mid Adult Ward when I move to SLC, as I am one of only two single adults in our ward here, and we two are excluded from most activities, not by any kind of design, but because they are currently planned as date-nights for the Elders and things of that nature. My Bishop feels that my ability to make friends and long term relationships would be hampered by a Family ward, and that I would be better served by a group who's sole purpose was the uplifting of the single member, to whatever end; friendship, dating, etc. I learned that I hate to be alone, but am capable of doing whatever I need to in order to survive. I also learned that I'm much happier when I serve my fellow man in any capacity; rather than sitting all by myself and feeling sorry. Thank you very much for you comforting words. :) -Ryan

You're welcome. As a SAR, what is your impression of the SA wards? Is it still a meat-market atmosphere, or was that unique to the time and place I was at (Souther California mid-90's).

This ward is for 31 years old and up https://secure.lds.org/units/home/0,9781,600-1-7-169641,00.html A primary residence within Salt Lake County or Davis County. A legal-marital status of single, divorced, or widow/widower. A primary-custody order for minor children is not in effect. A personal commitment to accept a ward calling. A personal commitment to accept an assignment as a Home Teacher or Visiting Teacher, and to accept regular visits from your assigned Home Teachers and/or Visiting Teachers. A personal commitment to regular attendance of Sunday Worship Services (Priesthood or Relief Society, Sunday School, Sacrament Meeting), as well as other ward activities as circumstances permit. Home (SLC Single Adults) Single Adult Wards (SLC Single Adults)

Why not? Is there anything wrong with pondering on what you'd like to say to the Almighty? I don't think so. Perhaps in the pondering and writing you'll be impressed of a personal revelation, or helped to know what you should be asking of your Father in Heaven for.

Hello, all. The only experience I've had with single adult wards was when I was courting my ex-wife about 15 years ago. I had just gotten out of the Army at that time and we would go to church together. My impression of the Young Single Adult ward was that it was little more than a meat-market for women to find returned missionary husbands. Dating was heavily stressed, and routinely I would hear the young ladies taking bets on whom would be the first to score a date with the newest returned missionary. I found the environment to be pretty disgusting; especially since I was completely ignored as I hadn't served a mission (I'd enlisted in the Army at 17 - there was no other way I could have afforded college, and as I had been emancipated and living on my own since I was 15, I needed a home). Not that it was a bad thing, I was dating a member already, but I was very insulted by the attitude of the women there that I wasn't good enough for them. Heck, I was good enough to be respinsible for National Security; to safeguard the lives of my People and the lives of the People of our allies; I was good enough to be awarded several decorations for valor, but apparently not good enough to get a date in a young Single Adult ward. I find myself quite a bit older now, and hopefully wiser (or at least knowing what NOT to do), and am negotiating a position with an international corporation with a branch in Salt Lake City. that means moving half-way across the country and starting anew there. My current Bishop is very seriously recommending to me that when I get to Salt Lake that I attend a Middle Single Adult ward so that I can meet eligible women of my own age. I'm resisting this advice as first I'm not interested in dating right now, and because my heart is so broken from my divorce, I'm not sure that I'll ever want to date again. I surely don't want to be alone for the rest of my life, but I feel that it'll take me a very very long time to get mentally healthy to the point where I would be a good companion for someone else. Plus, I'm not capable of trusting anyone at the moment. My Bishop, who grew up in Salt Lake, said that the Middle Single Adult wards are not the same as the Young Single Adult wards; that there are many people there in the same situation as I am in, and that it would be a good place for me to establish new friendships and future relationships. I just want to be anonamous in a family ward. Does anyone here have experience in the Middle Single Adult wards; and specifically with the Emigration Single Adult Ward? Any advice would be appreciated. -Ryan

While I'm not gay, and have never had any homosexual tendencies, I do know what it is to look at something you know you can't have and have inappropriate sexual feelings arise. I like women. A lot. I can't help buy looking at beautiful women on the street and wonder what they look like undressed. Usually about that point I have to give myself a mental smack in the face and remind myself that I have 4 daughters. I wouldn't want some guy looking at them and thinking what I had, so I castigate myself, look away, and say a silent prayer to be strengthened against such thoughts. I find temptation even more prevalent now that I've been divorced; its hard to fight down those unclean thoughts; but I pray every day to be strenghtened against them. Most of my friends are women, ironically. Always have been. Amongst my friends are a former Playboy Playmate, a famous exotic dancer, an Army General Officer, and other women. No, I've never seen any of them naked, in person or photo (nor would I want to - I value our friendships), and each time I have that lurking curiosity I think of my daughters and chastise myself. As you previously said, it would be good for you to seek male companionship; but not for any other purpose than friendship. I don't recommend that you date men in order to combat the feelings you're having as that would be unfair to whom you're dating, and would cause you undue confusion and stress. Remember, The Lord loves you for who you are; your immortal soul, and not for what earthly carnal desires you have. The Elders of the Church love you. I love you.

The Flamingo is ok; its a little old so it doesn't have all of the new fancy LED lighting displays that some places have. Stay away from the strip after 8 pm. There's plenty of things to do in the Vegas area; like helicopter sightseeing tours of the dam area, etc. It just depends on how much you want to spend. Vegas isn't cheap like it used to be. Since the Casino's aren't making as much on gambling losses they have increased their prices on everything else to make up the lost revenue. There's always the LV Temple and Visitors Center...

50mg of Trazodone doesn't even make me yawn. Nor does Zyprexa or even 600mg of Seroquel. Right now I'm prescribed 50mg Ambein (Zolpidem), 100mg Diphenhydramine, 20mg mirtazipine, and 30mg melatonin. Barely makes me drowsy, and when I do get to sleep it lasts about 2 hours then I'm awake for the rest of the night. Doc says she's going to go old school on me soon and try Benzodiazapines if I can't get normal sleep soon.

I went inactive for almost 6 years. After 4 years my wife and I split up and got a divorce. For the following two years I was very.. worldly. When I started to go back to church (in another state from where I last attended) it was if I was new to the church again. People were happy to see me. The Bishop and I became friends (I had dinner with him this evening in between conference and the Priesthood session), and over a period of time we discussed my sins in a conversational way that wasn't at all uncomfortable for either of us, and made me feel less as though I was being judged, and more as though I was being given the opportunity by a man who loves me to unburden myself of things that I'd done that torment my soul. You don't have to go in and confess everything at once; start small until you have developed a trusting relationship where you feel comfortable in confiding in him everything that troubles you. He won't punish you, nor do I believe that the Lord punishes us in this life (he simply witholds blessings we would otherwise receive); The Lord is proud of us and happy when we unburden ourselves of our sins, and He wants us to receive the blessings he has in store for us.

Do you think your Bishop is sinless? The likelyhood is he's been there and done that; the only difference is he's repented and learned not to do it anymore. I've had good Bishops and bad Bishops. One told me that singing marching songs that were about killing enemy soldiers was suffecient grounds for excommunication... Its the Army; you're supposed to be a stone killer, and part of the indoctrination of the warrior is to replace humane feelings with utter contempt for the life of your enemy. After I was out I confessed to another Bishop some sexual sins I was guilty of; no recriminations, no fire-and-brimstone lecture. He could tell that I was truly sorry for what I'd done and that I honestly wanted forgiveness. The whole "broken heart and contrite spirit" thing. I recall many of the Prophets speaking of the sweetest of all occurances; when the "Prodigal Son" returns.

Do you want to go to church, or do you not want to go to church? I'm somewhat of an expert on respirators; I use one almost everyday to protect me from carcinogens, heavy metals, and radionucleides. If someone told you that the filters of a respirator are good for one use only, that person is full of crap. The filters are effective until they're so full of garbage that you can't pull air through them any longer. A standard particulate filter which will filter out the chemicals you're allergic to will filter literally tens of thousands of gallons of air, or many months worth if you're just using it for 3 hours in church. Heck, I have a few brand new respirators I'll drop in the mail to you if you can't afford to buy one. Replacement filters are about $4.00 a pair. And my response would be, why shouldn't it be my right not to have to smell the arm pits and feet of the guy sitting next to me. Rationalization of the type you're attempting is identical to what the anti-tobacco nazi's use to try and ban people from smoking out of doors. If you don't like the smell of cigarettes, move away from who's smoking. Your intolerance is just as offensive as his smoke. Sorry, you're not a canary in any kind of mine. You're hypersensitive. The vast majority of us aren't. You're the minority, get used to it. The whole world isn't going to tip-toe around you; the rest of the world doesn't need to go to extremes to accomidate you. The onus is on you to find a way to live with the majority; not the other way around. Spoken like one who's accustomed to manipulating people with empassioned, but intellectually dishonest pleas. If you think your soul is in jeopardy and that attending church will save it, its up to YOU to find a way to attend. Its not everyone else's responsibility to do anything for you that you can do for yourself. The church stresses self-reliance in all but the most extreme of cases. Your case is not extreme; you simply don't want to do what's necessary on your end to make things happen. Sorry, but you're the one who comes off as being unreasonable, not everyone else. What would you describe it as then? You know what you need to do, but you'd rather that other people go out of their way to do something rather than you. Its simple. Put on a respirator and walk through the door. Tsk tsk. Who's being the boor now? Because its all the fault of someone else, right? Poor, poor, pitiful you. In the same way it would inconvenience you to wear a respirator. Isn't it your sense of vanity that makes you NOT want to wear the respirator??? Didn't you say you didn't want to stand out??? Or, you could just wear a respirator and nobody else has to be inconvenienced. I'm sorry I have to be so blunt. I deal with people every day who can't or won't take responsibility for themselves and instead like to blame things on everyone else; people who want 'reasonable accomidation' for a hangnail. The onus is on you to secure your own happiness; not on the rest of the world to do it for you. Again, I'm sorry to be so blunt, but if more people were simply told the truth, without candy coating, we wouldn't have a PC culture where everyone is afraid to say anything that could possibly offend a garden snail.

I've had diagnosed Major Sleep Disturbance since I was a little kid. When I was in Junior High School my doctor prescribed Phenobarbitol to help me sleep. Nowadays its Zolpidem Tartrate, Mirtazapine, Diphenhydramine, and melatonin; at such high dosages that its almost unreal. I rarely get more than a few hours sleep in a night; frequently not sleeping for several days at a time. all I can recommend is working with a doctor that specializes in sleep disorders to see if medication is right for you, or if therapy and sleep hygiene practices are enough.

You can deal with mediation the way I did.. by completely ignoring it. My ex-wife left me after 12 years while I was away on business; she called me every day I was gone and was unusually supportive and encouraging. I guess I should have guessed something was up because of her overly friendly way of talking to me (for the previous few years she was aloof and dispassionate). She was so nice I called her and told her I was coming home a day early and I wanted to take her on a little trip. She sounded excited and said I should call her when I got to the airport as she might want me to pick up some stuff from the market. I called her and she said "just come on home," so I did, talking to her all the way into the driveway... wherein I found a weeks worth of mail piled up on the porch. I knew something was wrong, and when I opened the front door it looked like a bomb went off. Nearly everything was gone, and what wasn't taken was tossed around like trash. It hurt me so much that when she filed for divorce from another state I just ignored all of the summons and let her get a summary judgement (after 2 years). The court was fair and I didn't have to spend my time driving 1500 miles round-trip to deal with things. Of course, your mileage may vary; but I couldn't deal with seeing her after how she left me ($47.00 to my name and nothing but a pillow to sleep on), and to this day I have as little to do with her as possible.

I used to drink, a lot. I simply choose not to now, and I would be horribly offended if anyone had so little respect for me as to bring alcohol into my home. Just as I would be offended if someone brought over a porn movie, tobacco, or mayonnaise.

Single mothers need to be especially careful about dating; there are some really creepy guys out there who will get close to a divorcee' just to have access to her children. A simple criminal records check may be in order...

This all comes down to respect. People need to respect you and your home. If you keep a dry home and others are angry about it, its likely due to substance abuse and dependancy. I'd be a little pissed off is someone had so little respect for me as to blantantly violate the sanctity of my home, my castle, by bringing in items that I'm against, or being under the influence of intoxicants in my home. If a guest wants to drink alcohol, more power to him.. as long as he's in his own home. My home, my rules. Don't like em'? There's the door.

I think that the younger you are, the easier it is to date. There are more available partners. I agree that a position in the church doesn't mean that person is of good moral character. I personally know of a Stake President who sexually abused one of my sisters. And if I ever catch the SOB in a dark alley, well, I'll likely be excommunicated for what I'd do. While a Temple Recommend speaks a little to the character of the individual, I also know plenty of members who'll go drinking and carousing on Friday, but will show up to the Ward Temple Night on Saturday. I think it ultimatly comes down to personal revelation about the person whom you're dating; if you get anything other than a burning in the bosom, so to speak, after praying about them, get away as soon as possible. Appearances are quite often deceptive.

Is this someone in whom you're interested in an eternal marriage with? If so, take things slow. An extra year or two of casual friendship now could save you a lot of heartache later. If you're not interested in an eternal relationship with him, get out now. Having friends that are of the opposite sex and in whom you're not in a relationship that will ultimately lead to marriage is a recipe for disaster.