Misshalfway

Bible Dictionary: Faith Faith is to hope for things which are not seen, but which are true (Heb. 11:1; Alma 32:21), and must be centered in Jesus Christ in order to produce salvation. To have faith is to have confidence in something or someone. The Lord has revealed himself and his perfect character, possessing in their fulness all the attributes of love, knowledge, justice, mercy, unchangeableness, power and every other needful thing, so as to enable the mind of man to place confidence in him without reservation. Faith is kindled by hearing the testimony of those who have faith (Rom 10:14-17). Miracles do not produce faith but strong faith is developed by obedience to the gospel of Jesus Christ; in other words, faith comes by righteousness, although miracles often confirm one's faith. Faith is a principle of action and of power, and by it one can command the elements and/or heal the sick or influence any number of circumstances when occasion warrents. (Jacob 4:4-7). Even more important, by faith one obtains a remission of sins and eventually can stand in the presence of God. All true faith must be based upon correct knowledge or it cannot produce the desired results. Faith in Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel and is more than belief, since true faith always moves its possessor to some kind of physical or mental action; it carries an assurance of the fulfillment of the things hoped for. A lack of faith leads one to despair, which comes because of iniquity. Although faith is a gift, it must be cultured and sought after until it grows from a tiny seed to a great tree. The effects of true faith in Jesus Christ include 1) an actual knowledge that the course of life one is pursuing is acceptable to the Lord (Heb 11 :4), 2) a reception of the blessings of the Lord that are available to man in this life; and 3) an assurance of personal salvation in the world to come. These things involve individual and personal testimony, guidance, revelation, and spiritual knowledge. Where there is true faith there are miracles, visions, dreams, healings, and all the gifts of God that he gives to his saints. Jesus pointed out some obstacles to faith in John 5:44 and 12:39-42. The most complete and systematic exposition on faith is Lectures on Faith, prepared for and delivered in the School of the Prophets in Kirtland, Ohio, in 1832.

I think that faith is continuing to make right and obedient choices even when such action would defy logic, or personal comfort or popular opinion. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Faith is centered in Christ and can be placed on every principle that is true, whether it can be seen and measured or not. I am reading 1 Nephi. Those pages are littered with examples of faith. It seems every step of Nephi's walk was taken in faith. He leaves his comfortable home, returns multiple times to get the plates, he asks God to confirm the words of his father and then sees visions of his own! Hee makes a bow to find food and constructs a boat from no personal knowledge and manages lovingly thru a very dysfunctional family! He was true at all times, including stressful ones when everyone was hungry and tired and murmuring and when he could have been scared, as I imagine I would be in the face of a drunken Laban and a commandment from God to take his life or an older brother who wanted to take his life! How many excuses he could have found NOT to follow the commandments of God. How easy it would have been to question his father or to give up after 6 years in the wilderness! But he stayed the course thru the hardships and trials and confusions and long periods of the uneventful and stretches where promised blessings had yet to be realized. I look at myself and wonder because it is so easy for me to murmur when things get hard or to get impatient with the Lord while I wait in my wilderness, longing for my promised land.

I think because God knows us each individually and intimately, He will send custom fit answers for us. I had a friend tell me once that he received an answer in a dream about basketball -- a language he could really understand. Sometimes I think He gives one big answer and others lots of little confirmations. It is my experience that even though it has been many years since my "big" answer on the JSmith question, that little confirmations still come to me. And they come during hymns and talks and movies and personal study. Some are thoughts....others are feelings.....and even some are ideas I never thought of before.

You know, when someone prays like that I feel a sense of gratitude. I spose I need all the help I can get! :) I guess I assume in my head that it might be referring to the sins we do but don't see or perhaps the mistakes we make inadvertently just because we are human. Perhaps it could even be seen as asking God to help us to become aware of our weaknesses or to become more "one" as wards and stakes as we all learn to work with and for one another. I think on my mission it made sense to pray for whole group of us, because the more sanctified we were as a group, the more effective we would be in the work.

I have one question. Atheism makes sense to me. It is a decision and gives one peace. There is no God and I live my life peacefully within that position. The agnostic position, however is one that feels more like limbo. Perhaps there is safety in not making a decision. But during my "dip in the agnostic pond", I felt so alone and lost and unsettled. The question drove me nuts and I wanted any answer one way or the other. Is there a God? If there is then that changes my course significantly. If there isn't, then I can free myself from all the pressure and move to a place of relying upon myself for answers. Does this make any sense? Perhaps my anxiety came because I had once been a believer and had lots of powerful experience to support such a position and the thought that there was no God was a great betrayal to me.....not to mention something that made me feel rather duped. I guess I am hoping to understand that benefits to living with the possibility that God exists but not completely committing to such. From what I have read of you DS, you lean towards the absence of a God but are holding open the possibility that a supreme being may in fact be there. I suppose that if there is a God, one must then determine the nature of such a being. Is it a person or a force or kind or mean or absent of such capabilities? And then perhaps the next question is what is man's relationship to such a being if in fact it does exist? Having the brief experience with "not knowing" that I did, I can completely understand the confusion that comes with such questions.

It is all good, DS. No rush. Except that I really want that chocolate!!! Haha I started a little research of my own. Have no idea where to start but I am looking into different things. Perhaps such an effort with lead to me to something relevant.

I so hear you Checker. And I do know, at least a little of your story. Perhaps you know a little of mine. We sit on opposite sides of the same issue. I agree with the perspective that PA is a disease. But things like cancer don't cost people their recommends and their salvation. They don't violate their wives unknowingly or otherwise in the bedroom. They don't tell their wives that they are disgustingly ugly because she got pregnant or turn her heart insideout and backwards and forwards with lies and blame-shifting and betrayals. I will tell you how many wives I have met that have so much compassion and understanding. I can't say the same about the addicts. They are often so lost in their own pain and shame and guilt, that they fail to see the pain of the person they profess to love. Denial. It is a crazy painful thing. I have so much compassion for the addicts -- at least the ones who recognize they have a problem and have the courage to seek help. What a nightmare of shame and lies! What a horrific thing to be involved in! My heart has broken more than once when I visit their side of this issue. But I have experienced this nightmare for 11 years and dealt directly with it for three and my H is remorseful and trying. It didn't save me from any of the pain or from losing so much of myself. So, please forgive me my defensiveness. It comes from a long trail of tears -- tears that exsist right along side the hope! There are many ways to help an addict. Help is exactly what they need and you are right that having a supportive wife is a tremendous boon! But you forget that their are two people that need healing and support. And it is often the wives who support year after year, and then have to support themselves alone because their H's aren't emotionally available to repay the favor. I found fault with your above post because there didn't seem to be much understanding for Katiekin's feelings. It felt like you were defending him and asking her to protect him. We women can be loving and supportive. But what do we do with our anger, frustration, and woundedness? They don't have the right to cause such incredible pain, and then play the victim card and make us feel bad for having absolutely normal reactions! I have said it before. They can start the fire, but they don't get to choose how long it burns or who it destroys! PS. Oh, I forgot to mention that cancer doesn't give your spouse STD's and other such delights! And my last thought is that if he will absolutely commit to recovery and demonstrate said commitment, then she can move to a place where she can support thru a relapse. But if such is followed by lie after lie and unkept promise after unkept promise, it can be the straw that breaks the camels back. And I think you know that too.

She can't run?????? Hmmmm. Please explain to me why she shouldn't strive to keep herself safe anyway she feels she needs to if she has a H that isn't about to control himself or commit to recovery? I mean she isn't the one leaving the marriage here. And you know, we all have pain, but does that give us an excuse to invite call girls to our hotel rooms and participate in other demeaning and unholy activities? I absolutely think that such activities ARE inexcusable. I do, however, believe that they are forgivable. But forgiveness takes many forms and does not always include trust. When someone is out of control and participating in compulsive behaviors they don't have the right to take others down with them. And while marriage is an institution of commitment, it is not a place where behavior such as PA and all of its escalations should be tolerated. If she doesn't set some boundaries, who will? He certainly sounds sincere, doesn't he. But PA's tend to be very charismatic and convincing. So much so that they even convince themselves that "this" is the last time. But it rarely ever is. So Checker, I know you have been thru a lot, but no one deserves this kind of behavior in their marriage. And until he gets treatment and shows some serious progress, why should she let him back in her bed, her house, or her heart?????? It is crazy to me that we decide before we get married never to let anyone treat us this way. And then when someone does, we are told by some to sit there and take it because that is "loving". Well, if you ask me such things do nothing to help anyone in this situation move to health and healing. In the addiction world, we call this enabling and in the sweethearts club we call it settling! I am sorry to be a little firm here, but I couldn't let that post stand without saying something.

They say that it takes 40-70 failed attempts before PA's can really say that they have recovered from this. I am so sorry for the both of you. How sad and heartbreaking for him to want to quit so badly and not be able to yet, and for you who has endured such betrayals. I like that he is seeing that his salvation hangs in the balance. That seems like an important realization. But the proof is in behavior not in words. It will be interesting to see what he does next. I am glad you are coming to the group. I am looking forward to getting to know you better. I am sure the girls would love to read your story. I am sure many, if not all, will relate. Hugs and comfort to you. I will post more in the group board. Take care of yourself!

Thanks for sharing with us your experience with the missionaries. I love honest missionaries and honest investigators alike! :) Did you blow little spitwads over the side of the booth? Just kidding. It is sad that people can't control themselves at least to the point of keeping their ears in their own conversations! Hope you will keep us posted and hope you find light in your reading of the BofM. Take Care PAGuy.

I am so very very sorry, Katiekins! This is a heartbreaking story and I am sorry to see such good people being pulled down by the sickening destruction of PA. It sounds like he has come to some understanding that he has a problem; at least he started 12 step work. But it doesn't seem to me that he has really internalized the principles or gotten to the root of the problem. The fact that his behavior has escalated and is moving into the 3D world is also worrisome. It is clear that his abstinence has been a white knuckling effort and and not real recovery. I think that it is common for the starve -- binge cycle to happen with our LDS addicts. They use, feel guilty, hold out, and then explode. It is a sad thing to watch. I hope that you are able to set some clear boundaries with this man. You sound strong and centered. But you don't have to put up with this behavior and you are absolutely right about the trust issues and should proceed with caution. Have you thought about getting a therapist ? Is your H pursuing his recovery again? My heart breaks for you. But you are not alone and there is much in the way of hope and many who have walked this road before you. Much love, MWH

Oh my goodness! I think you are right on. If I were a parent, I would want folks like you working for the protection of my girls. I am trying to decide if this was a YW's activity or perhaps activity days. If it were me, I would show the lyrics to the leaders of that auxillary first, such as the YW pres. Then I would take it too the bishop if nothing was done or if the issue wasn't handled appropriately. My guess, is that once everyone gets a look at the lyrics, they will take action and you won't have to worry about it again. I remember my YW leader had us over to watch the movie "Grease" for an activity. We all danced and learned the words to the songs not really thinking about the lyrics. My leader thought better of this activity later and had a talk with us about our standards and how we shouldn't lower them to get a guy or to be more popular. It was a learning experience for all involved and was turned to good. Now some might argue that such a movie is harmless or at least in that nebulous gray area. I for one felt the Spirit as she pointed out the hidden evils in the attitudes of the movie. She taught me a lot about trusting pop culture for values.

Why do I have this overwhelming need to stick my tongue out at you???

Where is he? Did he get distracted by an athiest?

Cpr

Ugly is as ugly does!

Signing in! I have my swimsuit and my flippers! I am ready to go!

blind dates

root canal

So sorry to hear that, TG. Life does go on though, and it seems you have wonderful people to go on with. :) Sounds like a fun summer.

plaid shorts.

I discovered my biceps and my glutes! Yowch!! Hahaha You see, I just started working out. I also discovered that otterpops are my most un-favorite desert of all time and that my children apparently don't know where the garbage can is. (I say that after cleaning up those sticky plastic wrappers all over my yard, garage and house for the last five days!)

NIce to meet you! Welcome.

Welcome Ohio!!!!

So fun to be a grandma!!! Welcome to the site. I am sure your experience with a non-member H will give you added insight. Looking forward to reading you.