discoDan Posted November 16, 2008 Report Share Posted November 16, 2008 Hi all, This is really awkward, but I'm experiencing a problem: I'm addicted to pornography. I've tried a lot of different approaches, and it still comes back. Are there any resources or advice about kicking the habit? Any direction would be much appreciated. Thanks Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Still_Small_Voice Posted November 16, 2008 Report Share Posted November 16, 2008 I would clean out your hard drive (if you are looking at it on the Internet). Delete anything that is not appropriate. Next, have someone password lock your computer. Don't let them give you the password. Make a rule that the only way you can be on the computer is if someone else is in the room. Next I would talk to your bishop. You won't beat this alone. You need his help and the Lord's help. How is your prayer life? How much time do you spend in the scriptures? Are you having problems with just the Internet? When and where are you having problems looking at pornography? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
discoDan Posted November 17, 2008 Author Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 It actually happens everywhere. The computer and filter are password protected, only accessible by my wife. At work, I have a friend who password protects the filter for me. I have spoken to the bishop, and gotten some good advice and support. What I'm really looking for are techniques that people have found helpful. It almost always happens on Friday afternoons (about once every two weeks). Anyways, thanks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KristofferUmfrey Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 It actually happens everywhere. The computer and filter are password protected, only accessible by my wife. At work, I have a friend who password protects the filter for me. I have spoken to the bishop, and gotten some good advice and support. What I'm really looking for are techniques that people have found helpful. It almost always happens on Friday afternoons (about once every two weeks). Anyways, thanks.Smell Aversion... make the nastiest, rottenest, most putrid concoction of whatever put it in a little airtight (obviously) vial and whenever you have the temptation or start to fantacize about it open it up and take a big whiff. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moksha Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Try Googling "Larry the Cable Guy naked". That should put you off the habit for quite some time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest tomk Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Dan: My name is Tom, and I am a fellow addict. The only rescue and relief I have found from my addiction to pornography and masturbation (the 2 usually go hand-in-hand) has been through seeking and maintaining a close relationship with my Savior, Jesus Christ. In my signature is a link to Heart-t-Heart. They are an LDS adaptation of the 12-steps foundin AA. I would go check out this site. You can ask for a Sponsor, and they have some great literature available to help you walk through the 12-steps one by one. Good luck, Tom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Still_Small_Voice Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Are you attending the "Addiction Recovery Program" at your ward? You can attend and not state why you are attending. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tubaloth Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 The problem is you have developed the habit of pornography. The key is now you need to develop another habit instead of it. Recognize the situation where this happens. If it is Friday afternoon, then start doing something different on Friday afternoon. Start a book, go to the temple, go cook pancakes. Anything that changes the habit. Part of this you need run from evil! You need to realize when you are heading down that path that leads to pornography. Recognize the steps that you end up taking that leads that way. Start to divert them with other things. Find a talk from General Conference that Pres Hinckley (or Elder Oaks) gave about pornography. Read this when you see that you are headed down the wrong path. Get on your knees and pray every time you see you are heading in that direction. (Realizing that sinning cause Jesus Christ to suffer so much that he bleed from every pore. How many drops of blood have you caused?) Also read your Patriarchal Blessing, if you can, memorize it! This is the best way to put things into perspective! Keep talking with your bishop, once you find your motivation to change you can change! But only after you have that motivation to change! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wokie Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Dan, as tubaloth posted you need to do something else to break the habit. Find a new hobby or interest to keep occupied. Don't just do it on a Friday when the other problem occured, do it every day so you are in the habit of doing it daily. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
japacific Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Its natural to like the stuff, but if you really have an addiction that it does have the potential to do alot of damage in your life. I agree with what has been said above, that if you cut it out of your life it will leave a hole, so you need something to replace it. More than that if you just had ways to keep busy then that will stop you from looking at it. Just spend your time with others, or spend your time doing something else. If you really wanna get some good advice, go to google and search pornography addiction. Alot of resources there. You should be able to find some good help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Misshalfway Posted November 17, 2008 Report Share Posted November 17, 2008 Hi. I am glad that you have taken such steps to try and curb this compulsion. I am glad that you have observed yourself enough to know when your weak times come. I guess I am wondering what you have tried in terms of techniques? What have you read? What about emotional work? What about identifying your triggers and your addictive thinking? It is my experience that learning to manage the addiction is important, meaning learning to manage all that leads up to the using. That means managing out of balance emotions and incorrect thinking. I think if you can identify those root issues, that the need for the compulsion diminishes. And one note about having a relationship with Christ. He does change our heart but I think he does so through our efforts to understand the truth about ourselves and our emotions and thoughts and behaviors. It is more than just white knuckling in obedience and then blowing it at the end of the weekk. It may be years before the "rewiring" process is complete. But worthiness and managing and peace is possible thru the process. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Still_Small_Voice Posted November 18, 2008 Report Share Posted November 18, 2008 Give us a follow up sometime Disco Dan and let us know how you're doing. I'll say a prayer for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
checkerboy Posted November 18, 2008 Report Share Posted November 18, 2008 Hey I have been there. My question is how does your wife handle your addiction? While it isn't her job to monitor you, how she reacts can have a huge impact on how well you do. My wife seemed to not understand that. She would constantly yell at me and belittle me, which just made the desire grow to view the stuff. I stopped telling her when I had a problem because I didn't want to be yelled at anymore. There was no sense of "we can work through this together" coming from her at all. I hope your wife is supportive. I have watched other couples kick this addiction when they worked on it together. I am not saying that you can't do it alone but it is 100 times harder when you don't have the support of a loved one. By support I don't mean her monitoring you or questioning you, either, but showing genuine concern and care about doing whatever she can to make it easier for you to break the habit. Our spouses are to be our helpmeets and this is definitely a time when you need help. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
georgia2 Posted November 22, 2008 Report Share Posted November 22, 2008 There are several books on Deseret Books on the subject. Read the reviews and descriptions so that you would order the books that would best help you. I just ordered 2 for a friend of mine. One is supposed to have real techniques and exercises that leading specialist in that area who is LDS has written. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jolee65 Posted November 28, 2008 Report Share Posted November 28, 2008 Its like any addiction you have to find something else to replace it , for me instead of smoking I go to the gym , but thats what works for me , start a new collection model cars ones that you have to take the time to build .My husband collects books and yes he had a problem before we became active thousands of floppys with hundreds of thousands of pics think about the time that took and he will never get that time back. He does read the books he collects its mostly history and politices. when you have an addictive personality be very careful with what you allow yourself to become passinate about avoid anything thats sexual even magazines with underwear ads, think hard of a new interest and get a sponser , pray and read scripture daily . good luck Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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