Dating in the youth

[Thetruechurch]

I hope this is not a touchy or inapropriate topic but,

Aside from the obvious rules of chasity which I don't have an issue with, are there any specific guidelines, restrictions or rules in relation to dating amongst the church youth?

I'm 16 and have been in mens for quite a while now and attended a few stake youth events. I've seen quite a few girls there who come across as friendly and attractive, one who I have quite a crush on. I whilst I am not rushing into to a relationship yet, something very strong inside tells me, that my future spouse will likely be a member of the church. I

Although I said I'm not rushing into any relationship, and will consider my partner carefully. I do feel largely unsure over the subject, and how it may reflect to church policies and other members.

Any advice would be helpful :)

[beefche]

For the Strength of Youth pamphlet gives guidelines on dating.

Here's what they say about dating:

Do not date until you are at least 16 years old. Dating before then can lead to immorality, limit the number of other young people you meet, and deprive you of experiences that will help you choose an eternal partner.

When you begin dating, go in groups or on double dates. Avoid going on frequent dates with the same person. Make sure your parents meet those you date. You may want to invite your dates to activities with your family. Plan dating activities that are positive and inexpensive and that will help you get to know each other. Do things that will help you and your companions maintain your self-respect and remain close to the Spirit of the Lord.

[Thetruechurch]

For the Strength of Youth pamphlet gives guidelines on dating.

Here's what they say about dating:

I actually don't have one of those. I'll make sure to ask my ward bishop for one on sunday.

[beefche]

You can look at online at lds.org. Linky here.

[Thetruechurch]

You can look at online at lds.org. Linky here.

thanks.

[Just_A_Guy]

I would add, keep the same standard of integrity as you date that you would in other aspects of your lives.

A tremendous amount of the drama (mind games, duplicity, manipulation, outright lying or just general dumbness) associated with teenaged relationships--even LDS ones--could be avoided by adhering to some basic standards of behavior that the Church reinforces time and time again.

It's amazing how many otherwise decent and honorable LDS teens become complete chuckleheads when dealing with the opposite sex.

[Mormon_Moshpit]

Also be sure to not do anything to her that would make you uncomfortable if someone did it to you. Relationships require trust and in the early stages, alot of that means comfort.

[fireshark]

Also be sure to not do anything to her that would make you uncomfortable if someone did it to you. Relationships require trust and in the early stages, alot of that means comfort.

I would say, don't do anything to her that SHE might feel uncomfortable with. We have a really funny president of the seminary (in our country), he used to say that the problem with kissing, wasn't really kissing...ok kissing could mean a lot, it could take us to unwishing paths...yet! the big problem was the "octopus arms" ^^...he passed by a couple of non members, kissing...he said he could not understand wether it was his arms, or if the guy had 4 arms....truth is that we make our dates better, never had a complaint...want to know why?

We don't make it phisic, we make it emotional, and as our former prophet said: "when we get old, talking will be all our relationship, find yourself someone you can talk".

But as I always said, experience is good, is necessary...but not always, what you fear, avoid.

[Pianoman216]

To the world having a serious girlfriend is a sort of right of passage for most young men. Growing up it was always something that I felt like I needed to do to be accepted. Now that I am an RM I see things completely differently. Your time as a youth in the church is VERY short compared to the time you will spend with your eternal companion. You have no need of looking for one quite yet. Right now you need to have fun with friends in groups. Find out what qualities you are drawn to in women and what aspects you appreciate the most. Having a steady girlfriend will limit you in this matter. Serving a full time mission will actually teach you even more what you are looking for in an eternal companion as you observe traits and behaviors of your temporary mission companions. Then, when you return home from your mission (or reach an approximately the same age if not going) you will begin searching for the one that most closely fits the qualities you are looking for. I met several girls from the time I turned 14 and started attending stake dances to the time I left on my mission that I could have sworn I was going to marry one day. Almost every one of them are long gone or are already married to someone else. Trust me, you dont need to start looking for someone to marry for a long time and frankly you dont need to even think about it yet (though, inevitably, it will more than likely cross your mind). Just have fun, remember your standards and treat women with the most respect you can. Dont worry about everything else involved in relationships for a few more years.

[groovygirl92]

At this age, dating should be fun. Date lots of girls now. Later on, after your mission, you can start dating seriously and looking for a spouse. Hopefully you will marry a worthy women and be sealed in the temple for time and all eternity.