Gay couple as roommates

[Hemidakota]

I'm somewhat confused on what to do right now. I am currently living in an apartment with 3 bedrooms. My roommate (The one moving out) that has the bedroom with a private bath is the room a 2 gay guys want to rent. (Each pays $170 a month per room...we sign a contract to pay that much each...even if someone moves out I still pay $170...however, the rental unit wants people in these rooms, so I am finding them.

Across from my room is an empty room I am going to be renting out to a foreign exchange student. So we will share the big bathroom.

The gay couple will be in the room in the front of the apartment. Separate bathroom, but we all share the laundry room which is in the closest of their room.

The guy I met is really nice and he agree to not show affection and such...but I'm not sure if the rental place will accept 2 people in one little room...not sure.

I feel like I need to follow the Church non-discrimination stand on this one. They recently supported that in Utah, but I want to be careful.

I will fast tomorrow and ask the rental people on Monday or Tuesday.

Good suggestion on fasting and asking the Lord on what to do...but being a LDS, I would encourage you to move and look for other roommates.

[Guest mormonmusic]

Well, they have Mormon friends, and they don't seem like the argumentive kind.

That's good, but I've run into situations where everythnig was love and peace at the beginning, and then things got awkward when we started sharing opinions that didn't agree. This has happened with politics, for example, when I've started discussing right wing versus left wing positions on various issues. I think that's why there's that social norm that you don't discuss "religion or politics".

Personally, I would leave the whole issue of religion alone. Don't steer the conversation there, don't initiate gospel discussions, just be the good person you are and leave them with the knowledge of how the gospel impacts your character and life, by example. Let them see your lifestyle of going to Church, serving others without grandstanding. If they ask about the sexual orientation issues, have an answer ready that answers their question, but is non-confrontive and affirms their worth as individuals.

Some might argue that you're "afraid to open your mouth" or are denying Christ like Peter did in not being more proactive, but when there's such divergent views, and some really strong, recent negative feelings expressed by the gay community as a whole, I think the maxim "when workign with people, sometimes slow is fast and fast is slow" applies here.

[talisyn]

MM has a very good point. If the rules allow for 4 people in the apartment make sure the couple is aware that you are a believing member of the church. If they move in and find something out later like you donated to 'Yes on 8' there could be frostiness.

IDK how you would work that into a conversation, but uncertainty in life makes things exciting

[Guest]

I love all people - gay or straight. I've mentioned tons of times that my husband's best friend is gay living with another guy.

But, I choose to live in a house gay-lifestyle-free. I don't see this as in conflict with the "love everyone" teaching. It is the same thing as choosing to live in a house alcohol-free or choosing to date active church members. If I were in that situation and it is "my choice" who goes in the next room, I would choose non-gay people, just like I would choose non-alcohol-drinkers. Now, of course, if the landlord puts gay people in the next room, I have 2 choices - make the best of the situation or find another place to stay.

My point is - I have the freedom to choose my environment. I will make it conducive to the spirit as much as I possibly can.

[Vort]

I love all people - gay or straight.

Congratulations on this. I am very far from such a state. I do well to love the people close to me, and I sometimes struggle loving the people I know, even those I know only through internet discussion boards.

[Hemidakota]

Now, this have nothing to do with hating homosexuals or lesbian but maintaining a spirit in the home or the apartment is an issue.

[Guest]

Congratulations on this. I am very far from such a state. I do well to love the people close to me, and I sometimes struggle loving the people I know, even those I know only through internet discussion boards.

I know it sounds like it's "trite" or... dunno what the word I'm looking for... but yes, I do love all people. It doesn't mean I won't have fights with them or that I don't show prejudiced behaviors sometimes or that I can live with them. But, after I learned about the pre-mortal existence and the fight in heaven and all that stuff, I realized, for somebody to have made it down to earth, they must have been one of the valiant souls in heaven. Yes, even Ted Bundy. So, yeah, everybody has something good in them somehow and really altered my perception of people I meet who I just can't get along with.

[yotoman]

Alright. I've made my decision. Thank you. Another guy called today so I gave him the room.

Also, the 1st guy that contacted me who is signing a lease said that he thought 4 was too many for our little apartment. He was not too comfortable about having a couple in general. He gets priority over them...I guess since he called first and has a say in the matter. I am more comfortable without a couple.

I thought about this also, and I would not be okay with a male and female because if that female is home alone with one of us, then there could be legal trouble.

It just could be awkward.

Edited December 8, 2009 by yotoman

[yotoman]

Ok...well....he just texted me and said they already found another place. lol Now they can keep their dog since they are not allowed with our apartment agency.

[pam]

Thread now closed as no longer applies.