Heard Any Great Quotes Lately?

[Guest Yediyd]

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

Dr. T, I just got out of the tub and put on clean jammies....If you keep this up...I'm sending you my water bill!!!

[Dr T]

Those were fun. I laughed.

Someone asked, "What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?"

[Guest Yediyd]

Those were fun. I laughed.

Someone asked, "What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?"

Now that is an interesting quandery!!!!

[Dr T]

What about:

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

[Guest Yediyd]

What about:

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

I'd like to know why the zipper in front of your pants is called a fly???

[the Ogre]

<div class='quotemain'> What about:

Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

I'd like to know why the zipper in front of your pants is called a fly???

Granpa always used to call it a barn door. Don't ask me why, grandma would wack him everytime he did.

[Dr T]

good question Yed. I bed Maureen could tell us why.

If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

[Dale]

I have been watching my old TV show Babylon 5 again. A reputed Egyptian blessing cited in it say's "May God stand between you and harm in all the empty places where you must walk...." I never found out if it was a real Egyptian blessing, but I like it.

[prisonchaplain]

How about the government official's vision statement: When all is said and done, a lot more is said than done.

[Dr T]

How is it possible to have a civil war?

[Dr T]

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

[the Ogre]

If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry?

Well, according to Star Trek, there would be a great explosion, so technically no.

[Dr T]

Is there another word for synonym?

[Guest Yediyd]

Is there another word for synonym?

Where do you keep comming up with these??? They are GREAT!!!! Keepum' commin'!!!!

[Dr T]

Not making fun but it is a good question

Whose cruel idea was it for the word "Lisp" to have a "S" in it?

[Guest Yediyd]

These are awsome!!!! Are they just comming off the top of your head, under the cat's tail or a book you are reading?

[Dr T]

No cat has my tongue. I had these from a list with no reference. I think it was e-mailed to me.

"Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?"

[Guest Yediyd]

Cool! You better get your tongue back from that cat...I shudder to think what she may do with it! shudder

...Keep posting these, they are funny!!!

[Dr T]

Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"

[FrankJL]

Define antipasta?

[Dr T]

This is not definition for an example of a recipe from Cooks.com

ANTIPASTA SALAD

4 hard-cooked eggs

Salad greens

Sliced red onions

Red pepper slices

Chilled marinated artichoke hearts

Green pepper slices

Sliced fresh mushrooms

Sliced zucchini

Anchovy fillets

Sliced ripe olives

Tomato wedges

Wash and thoroughly dry salad greens. Arrange in a large flat bowl or basket. Top with salad toppings of your choice from the listing above. Arrange in artistic manner. Present antipasta at table. Add oil-vinegar dressing of your choice. Serve on individual salad plates.

NOTE: Firm vegetables -- onion, pepper, mushrooms and zucchini may be cleaned, sliced and marinated in oil-vinegar dressing several hours before the salad is prepared for increased flavor and interest.

[Dr T]

If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

[Dr T]

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

[pam]

Behind every successful man stands a surprised mother-in-law. Hubert Humphrey

[Dr T]

That's funny.

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If the "blackbox" flight recorder is never damaged during a plane crash, why isn't the whole darn airplane made out of that stuff?