Lds Discrimination

[Guest mamacat]

i'm seriously distressed about this. i posted about our missionaries visiting us in another thread, and then related about how we had to cancel with them because our air conditioning went out on that very day.

i discussed a little about how almost every missionary visit that we have had scheduled, a major utility in our apartment has malfunctioned. but each time, these were restored within the day.

before i became LDS, our apartment management was very good about responding to our maintnance requests within a day, always saying that a/c repair was a priority in the very hot texas weather.

our a/c malfunctioning on thursday, the day of missionaries' scheduled visit, fit the trend of utility malfunctions at each appointment. however, now our maintenance seems to be deliberately leaving our a/c in disrepair. when i speak to our maintenance person about it, he responds to me in condescending and sarcastic answers. and now i believe they're doing it because of my affiliation with LDS.

it isn't something i would have ever believed...but, after being very rude about our a/c problem on thursday, saying he'd be here to work on, then not showing up til the next day, saying he'd be here in the afternoon, but not being til much later, etc.....and yelling at me about the time i would call, about the malfunction -- rudely saying it was my fault for adjusting the thermostat too abruptly. they've never been rude in this way before either.

he said it should work last night and when it didn't he promised to be here before 9pm, which i thought was a little late, but we really were wilting at an alarming rate. he didn't arrive until almost 11 pm, said it was necessary to turn off all the electricity, and work on the breaker in the bedroom, while i stood there next to him holding a candle so that he could see the breaker box. i really think he was just making fun of me, as i don't think the breaker box in the bedroom has anything to do with the a/c. as we were standing there, very late at night, in complete darkness, he started saying, in a very loud voice..."i can't get it in, i can't get it in, it's so hard....." repeatedly...it was extremely uncomfortable.....and upon reflection today, i'm quite certain he deliberately didn't fix the a/c yesterday just to pull this stunt and render me very uncomfortable and scared. and he did not repair the a/c. i really do not think he has any right to be in my apartment so late at night, yet i know that he would insist on entering our apartment, as they consider a/c malfunction an 'emergency'. so i'm really at their mercy, and now it seems quite a hostile situation at that.

the reason i think it must be LDS related, is that every utility malfunction this year, and there have been a lot, has occurred on a missionary appointment. the thing about our a/c problem today....our maintenance person returned very early this morning to continue the repairs. he was here all morning, in and out, saying he was repairing our a/c, but i saw him doing other things on the property, so i know that helping us with our a/c was not his priority as he had stated. i really think he's making us endure a sweltering apartment on purpose. he finally finished his work at around 11 am, with the a/c working. i was very grateful, and it seemed that my son and i could resume our activities (since thursday we haven't been able to do much, except sit languishing in front of a floor fan, waiting for maintenance person to arrive).

so well, our a/c was apparently working again as of 11am. but, i had rescheduled our missionaries' visit for today at 3pm. and just after 3:00, i noticed our a/c had stopped working again....i couldn't believe it! that is simply entirely too much of a coincidence not to be sabotage related to our LDS association!

honestly, this is the freakiest thing! after maintenance person did not arrive earlier in the evening as promised, i could tell that something in his behavior was not right....so i called the missionaries last night to cancel today's appointment -- again, knowing they would be unhappy sitting in our sweltering apartment. i'm just having a very difficult time believing they would do this us so deliberately and callously. but still, since thursday, we have had this appointment scheduled for today at 3, and that the a/c would just abruptly stop working at precisely this time seems much too strange to be coincidence.

i don't have any idea how our maintenance would know about our missionaries' visits either...i just know that this happens every single time. when i called maintenance person today, he was like, oh sorry, too bad, i can't do anything else today.....and didn't even try to disguise his insincerity. so now we've done nothing but sit around a baking, sweltering apartment since thursday, and will continue to do so throughout tomorrow, if he even decides to make an attempt at that time. we have to stay here, as we must be present because of our dog, who lives with us also. he can't stand her, and says that doing a/c work is a delicate activity that requires highly trained focus and concentration, something our puppy apparently disrupts.

i don't know, perhaps it's the LDS that is trying so hard to discourage our association with them. but if so, why go to such lengths? i tithe, i don't attend sacrament meeting, as it is very apparent that we are not welcome there, and i never ask anything of the missionaries or anyone else in the church. my bishop was extremely reluctant to provide me with my member number, doing so only after many months, and many requests, in a very sarcastic and patronizing way. except this, that i asked him for when he called me, i have not sullied them whatsoever with our presence. i don't have any idea why the missionares keep showing up on our doorstep. i don't mind at all, we always enjoy their visits, but it does seem like somewhat contradictory behavior.

if it isn't that, then it's something else making a dramatic effort to keep us far distant from all things LDS. i found this website to try to understand some of these things, and i suppose that making the attempt to understand all these discrepancies is one thing. but suffering through days and days of utility malfunction in our apartment really is a bit overwhelming. esp as it seems so directly related to our LDS association.

i am at a loss and in tears. it all seems very mean and unnecessary.

[CrimsonKairos]

Your utility repair guy needs to be fired.

That's ridiculous.

I'm sorry you've been made to suffer through the heat, I know how that is so uncomfortable.

Why don't you feel welcome at your ward?

I hope things start looking up, your situation is almost unbelievable with the malfunctions coinciding with the missionaries' visits!

[Guest mamacat]

thanks Crimson Kairos. i hope so too.

unwelcome? because my bishop doesn't believe my answers to his temple recommend questions, calls me a liar, and every time we attend sm, peopel seem to make hostile remarks and insults? i can ignore that, but when we attended a different ward in the same building/stake, it was rather the same, except that the primary leaders completely ignored my son, excluding him from all the activities, refusing even to look at him while he begged to be included. even while he stood there sobbing. leaving with my 4 yr old babe sobbing and begging me to explain to him why they were like that with him broke my heart absolutely. we did return, just to go to sm, not the remainder of the sunday activities, but the unwelcome feeling there is too palpable to ignore. it makes me nauseous and distressed, and this disharmony in my spirit extends into the rest of week. it just seems very unhealthy for my son and me to attend sm in these circumstances, in that particular meeting house anyway.

i've been thinking of going to another location/stake, but i'm very apprehensive of this. and, the others are a greater distance from us, and we can't really afford that much gasoline. we might try taking the bus, but i haven't figured all that out yet.

thanks for your kind response CK.

[MissHoney]

It sounds as if you need to be documenting what is going on. I would complain to the owners of the building. You do not need mention that you are LDS, what you need to focus on is the behavior of the maintence man.

[ldsrebel]

It sounds as if you need to be documenting what is going on. I would complain to the owners of the building. You do not need mention that you are LDS, what you need to focus on is the behavior of the maintence man.

Yeah.

Can you get ahold of the manager of the company he works for?

[Traveler]

This may not help and it may not apply to you. But I have noticed as I travel that often things go wrong. When they do I am most surprised by those that get angry at those trying to help them.

The Traveler

[Guest Username-Removed]

Run it up to the owners, if you get no results, call the local paper.

My appartment complex IS our ward - we have no issues, they are great. Just once in a while I get bikes stored in from of my front door from other neighbors, but thats no big deal as I ride them around the complex to see if I like them. After that, they dont leave thier stuff at my front door. PS I weigh 250lbs - it seems to get through to them. !!!

[ldsrebel]

Run it up to the owners, if you get no results, call the local paper.

My appartment complex IS our ward - we have no issues, they are great. Just once in a while I get bikes stored in from of my front door from other neighbors, but thats no big deal as I ride them around the complex to see if I like them. After that, they dont leave thier stuff at my front door. PS I weigh 250lbs - it seems to get through to them. !!!

LOL

[Guest Yediyd]

Your utility repair guy needs to be fired.

That's ridiculous.

I'm sorry you've been made to suffer through the heat, I know how that is so uncomfortable.

Why don't you feel welcome at your ward?

I hope things start looking up, your situation is almost unbelievable with the malfunctions coinciding with the missionaries' visits!

I don't find it unbelievable at all...as much as I believe in the HOLY Spirit...I also believe in an unholy one...Mamacat needs this church...and her adversary knows it! It is HE that is messing with her air conditioner, and I agree with you...her repairman should be fired!

thanks Crimson Kairos. i hope so too.

unwelcome? because my bishop doesn't believe my answers to his temple recommend questions, calls me a liar, and every time we attend sm, peopel seem to make hostile remarks and insults? i can ignore that, but when we attended a different ward in the same building/stake, it was rather the same, except that the primary leaders completely ignored my son, excluding him from all the activities, refusing even to look at him while he begged to be included. even while he stood there sobbing. leaving with my 4 yr old babe sobbing and begging me to explain to him why they were like that with him broke my heart absolutely. we did return, just to go to sm, not the remainder of the sunday activities, but the unwelcome feeling there is too palpable to ignore. it makes me nauseous and distressed, and this disharmony in my spirit extends into the rest of week. it just seems very unhealthy for my son and me to attend sm in these circumstances, in that particular meeting house anyway.

i've been thinking of going to another location/stake, but i'm very apprehensive of this. and, the others are a greater distance from us, and we can't really afford that much gasoline. we might try taking the bus, but i haven't figured all that out yet.

thanks for your kind response CK.

WOW! Mamacat, I am sooooo sorry and saddend for you! I've only been in One ward since joining LDS, and my expieriance has been one of welcome and love (even though, as a single mom...I don't fit in and feel uncomfortable at social functions alot) I am going through a tough time getting the priesthood to step up for my son, and that is discouraging...but I know that this is where me and my family belong...I hope that the Lord will comfort your heart and bless you for not giving up as many would have by now given your circumstances! That attest to YOUR strenth of charactor! God sees that too...the people may let you down...but hang in there because God wont! He will deal with those who need attitude adjustments and he will bless you for your perserverance!

God bless you!

Yediyd

Run it up to the owners, if you get no results, call the local paper.

My appartment complex IS our ward - we have no issues, they are great. Just once in a while I get bikes stored in from of my front door from other neighbors, but thats no big deal as I ride them around the complex to see if I like them. After that, they dont leave thier stuff at my front door. PS I weigh 250lbs - it seems to get through to them. !!!

Wordflood...you are my hero!

[a-train]

Mamacat,

Have you ever been diagnosed with any clinical anxieties? Please don't take this wrong, I am not assuming that your circumstances are all in your imagination. But, I am wondering if your situation has been compounded by a social anxiety.

-a-train

[Dr T]

Sorry to hear about that Cat. You don't need anything added to your life.

[Guest mamacat]

<div class='quotemain'>

Your utility repair guy needs to be fired.

That's ridiculous.

I'm sorry you've been made to suffer through the heat, I know how that is so uncomfortable.

Why don't you feel welcome at your ward?

I hope things start looking up, your situation is almost unbelievable with the malfunctions coinciding with the missionaries' visits!

I don't find it unbelievable at all...as much as I believe in the HOLY Spirit...I also believe in an unholy one...Mamacat needs this church...and her adversary knows it! It is HE that is messing with her air conditioner, and I agree with you...her repairman should be fired!

thanks Crimson Kairos. i hope so too.

unwelcome? because my bishop doesn't believe my answers to his temple recommend questions, calls me a liar, and every time we attend sm, peopel seem to make hostile remarks and insults? i can ignore that, but when we attended a different ward in the same building/stake, it was rather the same, except that the primary leaders completely ignored my son, excluding him from all the activities, refusing even to look at him while he begged to be included. even while he stood there sobbing. leaving with my 4 yr old babe sobbing and begging me to explain to him why they were like that with him broke my heart absolutely. we did return, just to go to sm, not the remainder of the sunday activities, but the unwelcome feeling there is too palpable to ignore. it makes me nauseous and distressed, and this disharmony in my spirit extends into the rest of week. it just seems very unhealthy for my son and me to attend sm in these circumstances, in that particular meeting house anyway.

i've been thinking of going to another location/stake, but i'm very apprehensive of this. and, the others are a greater distance from us, and we can't really afford that much gasoline. we might try taking the bus, but i haven't figured all that out yet.

thanks for your kind response CK.

WOW! Mamacat, I am sooooo sorry and saddend for you! I've only been in One ward since joining LDS, and my expieriance has been one of welcome and love (even though, as a single mom...I don't fit in and feel uncomfortable at social functions alot) I am going through a tough time getting the priesthood to step up for my son, and that is discouraging...but I know that this is where me and my family belong...I hope that the Lord will comfort your heart and bless you for not giving up as many would have by now given your circumstances! That attest to YOUR strenth of charactor! God sees that too...the people may let you down...but hang in there because God wont! He will deal with those who need attitude adjustments and he will bless you for your perserverance!

God bless you!

Yediyd

Run it up to the owners, if you get no results, call the local paper.

My appartment complex IS our ward - we have no issues, they are great. Just once in a while I get bikes stored in from of my front door from other neighbors, but thats no big deal as I ride them around the complex to see if I like them. After that, they dont leave thier stuff at my front door. PS I weigh 250lbs - it seems to get through to them. !!!

Wordflood...you are my hero!

wow Yedi, i'm very tired and drained atm, but your words have soothed my spirit tremendously. thank you sister.

...and wordflood's energy is very uplifting as usual also...ty.

Mamacat,

Have you ever been diagnosed with any clinical anxieties? Please don't take this wrong, I am not assuming that your circumstances are all in your imagination. But, I am wondering if your situation has been compounded by a social anxiety.

-a-train

no it hasn't. i am very calm and grounded. just a bit frustrated atm.

i haven't made up the things my bishop has said, or anything else. i'm actually very objective about things, and am more than generous in giving people and situations the benefit of the doubt. perhaps that is my problem.

[a-train]

I have dealt with people who have suffered severe anxieties. Two cases on my mission were extremely severe. If your thoughts are constantly on the subject of whether or not you are loved, accepted, liked, etc., this could be anxiety. Now you may very well live in a world where everyone hates you, but if you have no anxiety about it, it won't bother you.

Anxiety can get so out of control that people will fear to leave their home, it can eat people up. Paranoia sets in. Great difficulty is experienced in interpreting sarcasm. Everyone becomes suspect and exclusive. Bitterness can result. The anxious will begin condemning those that seem to reject them. Tiny misunderstandings compounded by anxiety become great walls of seperation and distrust.

Do you think that you might be suffering these symptoms?

-a-train

[Guest mamacat]

I have dealt with people who have suffered severe anxieties. Two cases on my mission were extremely severe. If your thoughts are constantly on the subject of whether or not you are loved, accepted, liked, etc., this could be anxiety. Now you may very well live in a world where everyone hates you, but if you have no anxiety about it, it won't bother you.

Anxiety can get so out of control that people will fear to leave their home, it can eat people up. Paranoia sets in. Great difficulty is experienced in interpreting sarcasm. Everyone becomes suspect and exclusive. Bitterness can result. The anxious will begin condemning those that seem to reject them. Tiny misunderstandings compounded by anxiety become great walls of seperation and distrust.

Do you think that you might be suffering these symptoms?

-a-train

lol, not at all. i love going places and doing things. i do so whenever we can. and i don't feel rejected in the least. if i see my son standing in the middle of the room in tears though because no one will answer his questions, then i do feel rather resentful about that, and rightfully so. nor am i bitter. i have oeverlooked all of this and more since being baptised in january. none of these things happened in my apartment before this. on the contrary, i rather feel that i am too trusting and naive about most of my interactions with people. my previous marriage was interracial. i do feel that this has some impact on my situation, after quite a lot of thought about it. it's just not something i understand. i do know however, that racism is a strong and powerful current in our society. i know i'll have to teach my son about that...it just occurred much sooner than i expected. and it breaks my heart to see him hurt so much.

but i'm all in to forgiveness and all that...and really, my philosophy at this time of life is that forgiveness isn't even really a necessity. as i believe that all people are struggling to do the best that they can with what resources are avialable to them. whatever interaction occurs between others and me is the result of the privilege we are given to develop our spiritualty to a higher degree on this planet. i practice tonglen, a buddhist technique of identifying our own pain with the rest of humanity, thereby transforming the negativity through breathing and intent.

a lot of this relates a lot to something you stated to me in another thread ~

You know mamacat, I've heard that there are places in the universe that are used to teach beings about certain laws that they have not yet mastered, but when they are ready they move from those places to places where those laws are in force and learn there about even higher laws which when mastered will allow them to move to yet another place. I also heard that in all of these places, the people are allowed to make their own decisions and learn on their own at their own pace. Your post just reminded me of that.

that, my brother, sounds right and true.

it's just at times my mastery of things in this dimension isn't always up to par. i try to make my way the best i can.....and seek understanding wherever i can find it.

thank you for these thoughts a-train

namaste