Mixed emotions

[Karyme]

I obtained a divorce about 4 years ago.  My ex was cheating on me and we divorced.   Now he wants to attend church with his " new family ".   Yet  this is with the person that disintegrated my family.   From my understanding he was never excommunicated.   They both were married at the time.  They now have a child together.   She is not a member of the church.   Having mixed emotions.   Advice please!

[Vort]

My advice:
Ignore him. Don't follow what he does or how he does it. Ignore his wife, his family -- everything. He is no concern of yours. Quit thinking about him. He is not a part of your life. Get on with your life, without him.

[Guest]

I can't imagine how painful this must be for you. I'm so sorry.

I grew up with some kids whose dad cheated and left... and later married the mistress, and longer on down the road they were sealed and had their own children. I know their mother. She is a good woman who has been dealt a really crappy hand. 

I won't say it's been easy for her, because it sure hasn't at times. But she has made a very full life in her work and her children, and her ward family. She is loving and supportive of all around her and very involved in her grandchildren's lives. 

This will sound like a platitude, but it's not. You're not going to be able to change this situation. Your only option for easing this burden and healing your heart is to hand it- all of it- to the Savior. Give Him your pain, disappointment, anger, grief, all of it, and then trust Him to do what needs to be done. Don't worry about church discipline. Don't obsess about their life. Turn it over to the Savior, and build something new. Easy to say, I know, but I'm watching a brother go through the same thing without the benefit of faith, and it seems impossibly hard. I wish he would turn to God and Jesus again. 

Again, I'm so sorry. 

[LeSellers]

9 hours ago, Eowyn said:

You're not going to be able to change this situation.

That's the key. There are things we can change, and we should change them. But those things we cannot change require that we change ourselves.

Lehi

[Guest]

Is he in the same ward or stake?  If not, I agree with @Vort, forget about him.

If he is in the same ward or stake, you can talk to the bishop and/or stake president and see if you or he can be assigned to a different ward or stake.  They make exceptions in cases like this.  After that's taken care of, then proceed to ignore him.  God will eventually judge him.

[anatess2]

Good advice on the above.  Try to put some distance while you heal.

What the situation has made clear is that you haven't healed.  Forgiveness is healing.  Might be good to start with that at least.

Just my thoughts.

[letmeoff]

On 18/04/2016 at 1:45 PM, Karyme said:

I obtained a divorce about 4 years ago.  My ex was cheating on me and we divorced.   Now he wants to attend church with his " new family ".   Yet  this is with the person that disintegrated my family.   From my understanding he was never excommunicated.   They both were married at the time.  They now have a child together.   She is not a member of the church.   Having mixed emotions.   Advice please!

Just forgive him without making anything good come from it, it will help you put the past relationship into perspective.