Praetorian_Brow

Expectations. Anticipation is the greater emotion, especially when it comes to marriage. The irony though, is that no one can possibly meet our anticipation and given today's culture of women increasingly viewing men as a disposable accessory and men not being allowed to be men, then its no surprise when the divorce disease is an epidemic; which of course leads to loss of identity for the children and a hesitation to commit, therefore, snowballing the divorce disease. At work, women I work with, in the same job, expect to be treated differently and manipulate the situation such that they rarely perform simple tasks such as moving an empty skid. My ex-fiancee, constantly compared me to her father, who was a former drug addict and was mentally absent for most of her growing years. My sister grew up during my parents divorce and much like my ex-fiancee is constantly looking for a father figure to replace what they didn't have, but the terror is that they can never replace their idea of what a man is, with a real alive man, because they will never match her mental image of what she believes she has missed and therefore, they are both convinced its all the men in their lives are the ones failing them. I play a lot of video games, procrastinate life and have had nagging exes who infer I am not a man, despite being in the infantry for nearly four years, holding down a good job and living on my own. Why? Its because what they expect is more than what they can get. Or, if they get the dominant male that they are looking for, they resent and divorce him, because he is a jerk. A marriage quickly spirals out of control when we define the other person as wanting, or convince ourselves that the other person is the problem. Of course, someone will mention the abuse clauses and etc, etc. Although, I have learned that women talk incessantly for some weird competitive desire to be acknowledged. Women, don't talk to your man like he is a woman and men, don't assume that she will quell her own fears. The solution, focus on the positives.

No.

There is far too much idealism when it comes to definite matters such as declaring Jesus as this or that. We know about what, 5 years of his life, if that. Those few years are written about by others, in hindsight, years later. Given our current doctrine, he would have had a family at some point and to have the head of our church as contrary to our beliefs, would be a strange thing indeed. In my opinion, I believe he had to be human and had to experience imperfection through his own choices, in order for the atonement to make the impact it did. It is not enough to suffer for everyone else and feel himself perfect, which would lessen the personal sacrifice. Getting a body introduces limitless possibilities of imperfection and for me, believing that Jesus was once one of us and overcame his own imperfections along with our massive combined frailties is far more hope inducing than believing that he chose to be my older brother out of perfection. It does not lessen who he is to me, believing that he was imperfect, but reinforces the idea, that I can walk in his footsteps, if I choose.

Many people confuse common sense or logical conclusions as divine revelation. My father has more experience than I do, in some aspects of life, but not all, but if he talked about who I should marry, I would laugh in his face. Now, if my mother talked about who I should marry, I would listen momentarily and appreciate her intentions, but I would ultimately realize that using my maturity to determine my own path is what maturity is about. Listen to your heart.

Your father is correct. Your Mothers "revelation" is misguided, even with good intentions of finding her daughter a spouse. Only you can get figure out who your spouse should be. I have noticed that a lot of people distort or blur the lines between revelation and wishful thinking. I have even encountered a few who label revelation in an attempt to manipulate.

Socialism in this example does not infer Marxism, that was perverted by dictators. The word itself speaks of social justice. I do find it interesting that capitalism was suggested as a policy of the church. If we have learned anything from this, discourse, it is that Jesus is not political. As it is my turn to be on the defensive, as I gather that the present majority feels that I am intentionally undermining the church, insulting fellow forum members and possessing a sub-standard understanding of the church and the gospel. The above assumptions are incorrect, as I love the church, appreciate the perspectives shared here and have no need to quantify my faith for others. I do realize that most of what I write is taken for face value, so my sarcasm is lost in translation. I also forget that most people are letter of the law, as opposed to the spirit. My remarks are not directed in a manner that is derogatory, as that is not my style, however, I am sure its been noted that I can be frustrated when my intentions are judged wanting. To sum up my intentions; we can all do better. Goodnight.

Ah, I see the mistake, I made. I suggested Jesus was a socialist and for the present company to swallow that, would be asking too much. My intentions were to remark on that fact that SLC and its finances, are not what I expected from our church. I was unsettled by the disparity between charity and presentation while touring the various buildings. Taking the Sister missionary tour was interesting too, as at the end of it, they asked me what went wrong when everyone melted away, when it was message time. Sometimes selling something, even words, is unsettling as its intentions are suspect. Fair enough, I have already considered all of your remarks and I do appreciate the quaint nature in which they were presented. Thank you for your insights. Cui bono.

Evidently, sarcasm is unwelcome.

Oops, I seem to have overlooked the idea that Jesus personally supervised the building of a mall, using a ridiculous sum of church money in one of the gay capital of the country, in order to cement the idea that Zion. Questioning finances does not question the authenticity of a calling or religion.

Three billion dollars and counting would feed and teach an amazing amount of people. The Temple Square complex is of vast wealth and I am not surprised church finances are private, considering that an alarming amount of the investments seem to be for profit. You are not alone in being troubled by this matter. As for being chastised for your speculation, ignore those as sometimes those type of people are so busy looking at the clouds that they run into the next tree and declare its a trial of faith, given to them specifically. To question the position of the tree in regards to them is considered heresy. When I visited Utah and wandered Temple Square, I was struck at how similar the complex was developing and found it troubling that it had remarkable similarities to The Vatican complex. The most humble person I found to talk to there, was Ray, the homeless guy from Chicago. He was sitting on the corner across from the Conference Centre and warned me about the other beggars and their lies. I do give much credit to the welfare program and other such charities, however, I think questions should be asked about such matters. Would Jesus prefer us to spend 3 billion dollars and counting, or feed and teach people? There is nothing directly sold on the grounds, but it is remarkable how close such facilities are to the grounds. The creep of commerce is dangerous to all who consider themselves charitable.

Thanks for sharing that story. That kills me though, that she nagged you about not being a member, complained about eternal marriage and then had an affair to be more spiritually in tune with someone else. By doing that, she put herself into more spiritual danger than being with you ever was. The hypocrisy is astounding. I can empathize, given that I was in a similar boat, even with only getting your side of the story. You have my respect if she is still in your life.

Better than you can imagine, as I am so hot that I can skip the first date.

I was not encouraging derogatory remarks, but at some point exes, or crushes need to be discussed and if the date or new person doesn't have the patience to listen, then they won't work. It establishes a trust level immediately and illustrates how the feel about a relationship. If you don't have that level of confidence or are a nasty person, then don't talk of exes. I find it so interesting to hear how other people talk of others, as it is a good gauge of their character and it establishes a trust factor immediately. I am no saint and I do gossip on occasion, but it startles me so often when I hear other people speak such ills. Sadly, I find more often than not, most people are quite nasty and petty, but disguise it pretty well in public, especially when giving advice or speaking of themselves. Amen to Beefche. Can she be THAT stupid? - YouTube

I feel your pain man, I really do. My bestfriend, who is a return missionary, treated me like a ping pong for four years and what do people conclude, but it must be my fault as I am not the Mr. Mormon that is so desired. Even more sad, is that she manipulated the situation in such a way so that it appears that I am the one at fault for all of it and she appears to be an angel. Regardless, I love her deeply, my heart burns that warm fire when I think about her and every email, chat ding, text and phone call, my heart jumps thinking its her. Most of your angst is self induced, even with her failings to be direct. I know so many women who avoid confrontation or direct honesty as they seem to prefer to have their cake and eat it too. There is much cruelty in believing that you have someones best interests at heart, while manipulating the situation. Women hints are designed for women. Logic will not sway her either, so don't waste your time. A lot of women are not worth the chase, because believe me, if she is the type, you aren't the only one in those shoes. Look around, go on a date and blab all about your angst about this one to another one and you will be surprised at who actually cares enough to listen.

God helps those who help themselves.

There was an abrupt shift by the church from the burly mountain man look towards the suburban business look. It was no accident, as who wants to be intimidated by a mountain man missionary? Through the business model, the church gained more credibility. That being said, no amount of facial hair, dress or body art is worth someones judgement, or rejection of their worth.

I will give you the benefit of the doubt that you don't believe everyone chose their handicaps or that your spouse is arranged for you in some kind of pre-dream state.

The cliche that irritates me the most, is that, when people speak of events, positive or negative in their lives, they speak as if it was all part of The Plan. Its as if, they default themselves to believing that every event in their life was orchestrated just to test them. To me, its sad to see them speak as if everyone and everything is designed for their sole purpose, conveniently forgetting that they are not alone in this world. Besides, if every event that occurred to us was part of The Plan, what about the other 7 billion people. Were they all designed for your test? Stop being so selfish. Or even worse, there is an eternal companion that will be put in my path and thank you God for designing this person solely for my benefit. Spare me. I suppose for some people, its too much to think that their path is impacted by random events, their decisions and other peoples decisions. I see The Plan, as God made the chessboard and the pieces, but we move ourselves, in the moves allotted to us by life. Gods influence, if you want to call it, is rarely felt, but when it is, its as subtle as a breeze. Heck, if you want, you can throw yourself off the board and be creative. Who knows, you may find the love of your life in the shavings on the floor, despite all the pawns staring down at you with pity. We plan our own lives, based on input and experience. The plan that is spoken of is simply the basic plan of becoming better than what we were before. A father and mother wants their child to be as happy as they can only imagine, but its the child's purpose to find that happiness for themselves.

A tattoo is not a sin. This is where the culture of the church gets confused with the gospel and I am actually quite frightened of those who scream sinner for daring to act in a different manner than is expected. Making snap judgements about such silly things will become obvious when conversing with such deviant people and they will sense your hesitation as you define what they are in your mind.

Women can have all the priesthood they want; if they start putting away chairs, spending 95% of their lessons trying to figure out what the plan is and giving their uterus away. Really, I don't see all that many men wanting to herd hordes of children, or gabbing about other people. Then again, it would be nice to have a woman chase me, pay for everything, drive me around and then I could say, sorry, I like your bestfriend more. In all seriousness, most of the "powerful" callings depend on the relationship that they have with their spouse.

When a country believes its own propaganda, then other countries are in danger.

I have a Patriarchal blessing and it was one of the best spiritual experiences I have had, but I do understand that most of what was communicated to me is not directly from God. Saying that does not lesson the experience for me as I understand that what is said is filtered through the Patriarchs experiences and perceptions. It is not entirely surprising that most blessings, if not all contain the obvious reminders of family, marriage and temple. The clause that ones faith is not enough for what is written to occur or that the promise will happen with time, seems to be more of a idealistic cover story to prevent people from dwelling on the fact that the Patriarch is human. What is less obvious is where you are at a certain point in life and practicing the faith that by reading and studying your personal scripture you are practicing your trust in the process of exercising faith.

Fair enough, but to conclude that there is no God, based on the assumption that the traits and characteristics that you have imagined him to have is much the same as concluding that our Heavenly Father is the only reason any concept exists. Such a thought ignores our own ability to adapt and improve. If I was to wholeheartedly agree with the idea that anything in life was none of my design, anything that I had worked for, was due to God's omnipotence or direction, then I would be less likely to understand the reasons for being here. Indeed it was an accusation as I have been born and raised in the church and for a member to level that suspicion in a public place is a stupendously poor social decision. I do find it amusing that the above poster assumes their condescension is worth their time. That being said, my relationship with God is as good as I want it to be and none of what you have assumed about that relationship is worth the salt that has been added. Excuse my wry wit, as it is in no way intended to diminish faith. If anything, I was pointing out the hubris in imagining traits of a person who we agree is the Alpha and Omega.

I feel as if I have been accused of vile fiendish sorcery, then again, if I am as he has accused, I fail to understand why I would wallow in my own guilt and dare to expect more from my fellows.

God is what we want him to be. Personally, I haven't met him, but I am sure you upstanding folks would know him and wouldn't mind introducing me.