omegaseamaster75

No she shouldn't assume that it relates directly to her infertility....because it probably didn't.

Not really but I can spot a passive brag when I see one. It's not unmerited it's a learning opportunity, take note she said in RS they were having a "good news" moment. Not a "I would like your help moment." So it was inappropriate to mention her husbands promotion at that time and place. Did Char deserve it I don't know was she aware of her passive bragging? Either way it struck a cord with at least one person. Most people are unaware of their passive bragging....and this ties in to the posts about insensitivity, Char couldn't possibly know about the economical circumstances of other individuals in that room, nor could they know about her infertility issues unless she told them. So the rule is be self aware, ease up on the passive bragging, and unless your asked keep your opinions to yourself. As far as the lady that responded to Char in the way that she did....cattiness she's a woman it's typical

People do it all the time, mostly subconsciously it's extremely annoying: Passive bragging: Behavior characterized by a statement that insinuates one’s own awesomeness in an unassuming, detached or even self-deprecating manner - i.e. bragging while trying not to seem like you're bragging. AKA my super cool husband who works for "fill in the name of big time company" is up for a promotion. Please pray for him. Done during the "good news" moment in relief society. It's not good news because he hasn't gotten the promotion yet so why share it? If he did get it I still wouldn't share it unless someone specifically asked, and how would they know unless they were close family or friends.......so yeah total passive brag. ​We talk about being sensitive to others feelings, how do you think that the people who have husbands who are struggling with employment felt? Not only is my husband gainfully employed but we are looking at a promotion aka more $$.

Clearly this woman was out of line, but how could she know you struggled with fertility.....Even if you didn't struggle with it she was out of line, but we run into people like that everywhere. Dealing with those kinds of people is a part of life. You misinterpreted her meaning she wasn't attacking you for not having children. You don't know what her financial situation is, how could you? just like she couldn't know by looking at you that you have fertility issues how could she? No one likes a bragger, and your passive brag about your husband being up for a promotion might have struck a cord with her that really hurt so in typical woman fashion she took a jab at you, quite frankly you probably deserved it.

Uh yeah it's against the law No, I never gay marriage was not morally wrong. Your half hearted attempt at pinning me down using a poor example of teenage marriage is what I find objectionable.

Your going out on a limb here back off of it before it breaks.......we are talking about a legal marriage in 2015 in a state where it is legal. your hypothetical comparison does not hold water because you are again trying to compare apples and oranges again.. Marital eligibility 1000 years ago in Jewish culture and tradition is not the same as marriage today based on our cultural standards.

You don't see the difference? 2 consenting adults engaging in a legal act vs. 1 adult and 1 child engaging in an illegal act (depending on where you live)?

apples and oranges.....

Yes I agree sin is still sin Yeah it's a mistake, but maybe they look back on it and see who stood with them, and their compassion and love for the individual. Who in spite of their errors and mistake were able to look past that and love and support them. The OP needs to do what is right for his situation, I am not so sure that the spirit will get to involved....

We can agree to disagree, think about this however the OP has stated that this man is like his brother or is his brother? I can't remember. These events in this case a wedding is a once in a life time event. One from which he will have pictures and one in which he wants those who are meaningful in his life to participate in his happiness. No one is going to die, no one is advocating hatred of any sort, it is a celebration. Think of the hurt that is caused by being objectionable to this special (to him) event. When he thinks of his wedding day does he want to have good memories or bad ones and where does this leave your relationship with this special person in your life? Damaged at best. I have read how others would go but they would be unable to bridle their disgust at the event and if asked about would say so. How mature is that really? You can't suck it up for a few hours? You want your friend to not be gay well you can crush any chance of that with only a moments of intolerance. They know how you feel and when one day they do decide to come around and change their ways, if they do they will remember you and your kindness and tolerance.

Not exact is an under statement...... Jesus, for sure but if Jesus were there he might not be marrying another guy. T. Monson who knows I have no idea what his politics are on the subject

Can I be issued a temple recommend if I am an illegal? the answer is yes, and I don't have a problem with it but many might

So gay people can't be good parents? or are you in favor of more parent less children? You can pretend that they are roommates if you want but if I was married to another guy I would introduce him as my spouse.

Do you still want him to be your friend? If you do go to the wedding....have fun at the bachelor party...lol

So a quote and the link from where I got it “We recommend that people marry those who are of the same racial background generally, and of somewhat the same economic and social and educational background (some of those are not an absolute necessity, but preferred), and above all, the same religious background, without question” (“Marriage and Divorce,” in 1976 Devotional Speeches of the Year [Provo: Brigham Young University Press, 1977], p. 144). https://www.lds.org/manual/aaronic-priesthood-manual-3/lesson-31-choosing-an-eternal-companion?lang=eng Am I the only one who thinks that this might have slipped through the cracks....clearly an outdated quote, but still in our current curriculum. (specifically the racial background part)

Bet Char didn't see that one coming..... "The opinion of many, if not most victims of infertility or child loss within the church, is that the "every woman a mother" type of talk is well-intentioned, but still, very condescending. " I find it sad that you Char so closely associate the idea of motherhood with only the biological aspect of it. Motherhood is SO much more. I personally know people who have no right to be entrusted with the life of a child yet they are able to reproduce and do so anyways, their kids have no chance....... Just because you can doesn't mean that you should.

We have a paid clergy how do you feel about that?

Women over estimate how sophisticated guys are. Your friend has it right......

I don't see that Leah mocked you. You may perceive it that way, but it doesn't make it true It might be more difficult to respond how you have mentioned, but it is pretty arrogant to discount their opinion just because they haven't experienced the exact same thing.

No one is debating on if it acceptable for a woman to say no. The debate is on withholding relations as a punishment, or using relations as something to hold over the husbands head until the wife gets what she wants.

No. God will take his own counsel.

So PMS and Menopause excuse you from rational behavior and thinking? My lawyer is on speed dial if things get out of hand I got someone I can call.

I have sympathy for your problems I really do. Please do not expect others to know or be educated about your issue. How could they know? do you wear a sign that says "infertile". Should they be on pins and needles when you are in the room because you might be offended? should they change the way that mothers day is celebrated to accommodate your sensitivities? My problem is the woo is me attitude that we hear. Life is hard, we all have things to deal with...some people think that their burden is heavier than an others because of whatever..... reason, pick your hardship. I assure you that this is not the case.

you said "My problem is when people take those teachings - which are correct - and use them to belittle and hurt those who are not able to participate in that thing which is so desireable and necessary. I am thinking of several ward leaders in the three wards that my husband and I have lived in during our marriage, and many more members besides." I called you out because I find it hard to believe that in all of the wards you have been in they followed this strange practice on mothers day that you described. I am also calling you out your leaders in your own words "belittle and hurt". Perception and I'll quote you again, albeit out of context " I was probably making it all up because of my inability to see straight, through my own pathetic self-pity"

First what you are describing is the exception not the rule, poor leadership by that bishop and poor usage of sacrament meeting time. Second WE ALL HAVE ISSUES!!!! All of us, how presumptuous is it to think that your problems are greater than my problems? We can't cater to everyone or everything, its impossible....so the majority get the nod