artista

@carlimac
Im not one to disobey leadership, but I’m also not one to take the word of a stake president over the word of the entire church.
https://www.lds.org/youth/article/what-are-we-doing-at-mutual?lang=eng
If he wants all activities ended, I would approach him with this and say “I’m just trying to do what the Prophets and Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints want me to do”
...maybe a bit less guilty-tripy... but you get the point
I am all for respect, but don’t bow to direction that isn’t supported higher up.
SIDE NOTE: That is IF all your saying is true. If you just misinterpreted his direction or are embellishing things, then maybe take a different direction. But either way I would approach him and let him know your concerns and share with him that link I posted above.

Yup, one could consider TV and card games a mindless waste of time too. The occasional wholesome nature TV show like Planet Earth ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Planet_Earth_(TV_series) ) can be a good use of time, but most TV shows are not worth my time spent watching them. Including BYU TV's Granite Flat's... I watched every episode and I'm wishing I hadn't, it was a waste of time. Thanks everybody, I will take a long hard look at the time I spend on video games (even though it's like 5 hours a month) and think about taking that down to just 1 (an hour spent playing them with my wife *only*. If that's my restriction then very little will I play indeed.)
  I used to enjoy violent games but I've sworn them off. I agree everyone should probably stay away from games involving killing (rated "T" or above). I really don't think the Spirit is around when I play those types of games.

Okay guys! I need some help. I do not have a healthy or kind view on video games whatsoever. This feeling towards them came from 1) watching my brother play and get super furious and have angry outbursts 2) the talk by David A. Bednar titled "Things as They Really Are" that talks about the virtual world and 3) the statistics I have heard of that a percentage of video gamers tend to be led towards porn. I feel as though it is unproductive. Its a hobby for some, yes. We need hobbies. I guess my idea of a hobby is something that makes you a better person, helps develop talents, ect. In the temple we covenant to give our time & talents to building the kingdom of God. We can do that in millions of ways. My husband plays video games every now and then & I feel so bad cause I turn off. I hate it so much guys and I need help to get some more perspective on this topic. 

This post is 100% true. I hope my previous disagreement didn't put a bad taste in your mouth or that left you feeling cornered in this topic.
a little background with my family. I'm the oldest and grew up playing video games. Naturally my siblings followed. One sibling plays videogames probably as much as I do. With some games (namely Skyrim)  she would play more than me. She is now, after having overcome emotional and learning disabilities, in the air national guard and about to head off to college, likely going to be in the same situation your daughter was in.
Another sibling plays a TON. He had a lot of friends that play with him too. He is the kindest human being I know and is very active in the church. I have never in all my years of knowing my brother ever heard him say an unkind thing about anyone (though we have gotten into our argument growing up). While home a while ago, I walked into his room and with his NINTENDO posters on the wall, he had a white board with inspirational quotes written all over. I feel absolute love and admiration for my brother when I think about how he treats others. When he was about 10, a friend of his at our house was talking bad about another kid in our Ward. My brother did not hesitate to to stand in defense of this kid. Who of us can say that we had the charity to do that st age 10???
my last sibling plays a ton! And does very little else. He also struggles greatly with an emotional disability that renders him nearly paralyzed when around others in social situations. He panics at the idea of being around others he doesn't know and trying new things. He has insanely high expectations for himself and if he doesn't meet them, he breaks down. I once asked him a simple "what do you think" question in FHE and he started crying cause he didn't know. It broke my heart. With these struggles, he is also the smartest kid I have ever known. He missed a TON of school last ear because of a series of sicknesses and day's feeling scared of going to school. He passed the year with straight As. He beats us all in every board game, understood and used sarcasm at the same time he could speak, plays with robot electrical systems and is crazy goofy  
None of this is to defend the use of videogames, but just to show that these people have more effecting their lives than just a sick addiction to videogames. I have a friend that plays a to. And probably fits in that "loser" category. He wants to get married so bad, but recently was dumped because he didn't meet his girlfriends standard of righteousness.
I agree more than I disagree  I have probably fallen into that "loser" category oftennin my life 

I think you forgot to drop the mic ? . Great point !

I suggest we tally our time frittered away on this forum.

Let's make another list for tv, social media, and other pursuits.  You go first.

So you're just going to give up on them? You're a leader in their ward right? Maybe to get to know these young men better and see who they truly are and truly can become you can do an activity where you play a video game that consists of multiple players. Take interest in what they obviously take interest in. Show them you care about THEM. Then they will feel you love, who knows how long it will take. You have talents that they need. They also have talents to contribute to this world too. Maybe they don't know what they are or don't know how to use them. You can play an enormous role in their life with faith and love  

I think it is completely unfair to judge these young men by their video games. Have you ever stopped to considered what they struggle with? Maybe depression, or anxiety, or lack of motivation. & you know, maybe these problems started by playing video games. But the real problem in these cases wouldn't be the video games. In my opinion there is a deeper need not being met which leads them to spend hours playing these games, or eating unhealthy, or looking at porn. Maybe they weren't raised with a strong work ethic, or they had poor communication within their family, maybe their parents never cared so they didn't stop to think if it was wrong. We mustn't judge. We have no room to judge. We only have room and the responsibility to love and correct with love. If you said what you just said to any young man or woman struggling with any addiction or problem, I highly doubt it would give them motivation to stop. Love must be the motivator of all things. We must look deeper within the person and see the Royalty they really are.

I think it is completely unfair to judge these young men by their video games. Have you ever stopped to considered what they struggle with? Maybe depression, or anxiety, or lack of motivation. & you know, maybe these problems started by playing video games. But the real problem in these cases wouldn't be the video games. In my opinion there is a deeper need not being met which leads them to spend hours playing these games, or eating unhealthy, or looking at porn. Maybe they weren't raised with a strong work ethic, or they had poor communication within their family, maybe their parents never cared so they didn't stop to think if it was wrong. We mustn't judge. We have no room to judge. We only have room and the responsibility to love and correct with love. If you said what you just said to any young man or woman struggling with any addiction or problem, I highly doubt it would give them motivation to stop. Love must be the motivator of all things. We must look deeper within the person and see the Royalty they really are.

So you're just going to give up on them? You're a leader in their ward right? Maybe to get to know these young men better and see who they truly are and truly can become you can do an activity where you play a video game that consists of multiple players. Take interest in what they obviously take interest in. Show them you care about THEM. Then they will feel you love, who knows how long it will take. You have talents that they need. They also have talents to contribute to this world too. Maybe they don't know what they are or don't know how to use them. You can play an enormous role in their life with faith and love  

Oh my goodness haha. Yes we will be! I want to give video games a shot!! Who knows maybe I'll crush @Fether and be addicted from then on
Ps, just want to give myself some credit here. Before we got married I planned a date where we played video games and ate pizza on the floor because I knew he loved it & I wanted to do what he loved. And i enjoyed spending time with him & watching his ego go up as he beat me everytime (which wasnt hard considering everyone in the game beat me by a long shot). So I'm working on it!

@artista and I will be playing super smash bros here in a few days. Hopefully it will convince her that smashing your apponent across the map and ricocheting him off a wall is  not just ok, but healthy for a relationship

Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for your honesty! Very brave of you. I love that you brought up that the images are there!!! They will pop up randomly and it is quite the battle to remove them! Even after repentance and you are clean, that is the one thing that can remain. I know that we can fast, and pray, and fast and pray to remove those thoughts and I know the Lord will help us. So, in my opinion that is the worst side effect of porn. My brother watches porn and is severely addicted. And he wonders why his wife can't do those things for him. Addictions, of any kind, can and will destroy marriages and relationships. This topic should never be treated casually. But with boldness and love. 
One more thought: i watched the new spider man movie the other day and a part came up where peters best friend was on the computer in the library alone trying to help him find out information. The librarian comes in and tells him he should not be in there. He stammers a bit then uses the excuse of "i was looking at porn". I was soooo mad that this scene made it seem okay to look at porn, by using it as an excuse. Ugh. I was so upset. 

"Heaven will not be heaven for those who have not chosen to be heavenly." We decide. We committ. We change. 

"Heaven will not be heaven for those who have not chosen to be heavenly." We decide. We committ. We change. 

Simply calling yourself Mormon isn't going to change your behavior. It takes application on our part. 
I own a bottle of aspirin. The aspirin won't do me any good unless I swallow it.
Same with the church. There are plenty of people that attend church that aren't doing anything with it or applying the teaching. These people are the "Luke warm" that will not enter the Celestial Kingdom. They are not representing what the church is meant to be. They are wrong, not the church.

I would say any talk on charity is PERFECT. The pure love of our Savior can help us look past the sin and love the person for who they are. We live in a world full of potential Kings & Queens and we should aspire to treat people as such; royalty. 

Love this!! Thank you for sharing!! Are you married? If so, doea your wife have the same view???

Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for your honesty! Very brave of you. I love that you brought up that the images are there!!! They will pop up randomly and it is quite the battle to remove them! Even after repentance and you are clean, that is the one thing that can remain. I know that we can fast, and pray, and fast and pray to remove those thoughts and I know the Lord will help us. So, in my opinion that is the worst side effect of porn. My brother watches porn and is severely addicted. And he wonders why his wife can't do those things for him. Addictions, of any kind, can and will destroy marriages and relationships. This topic should never be treated casually. But with boldness and love. 
One more thought: i watched the new spider man movie the other day and a part came up where peters best friend was on the computer in the library alone trying to help him find out information. The librarian comes in and tells him he should not be in there. He stammers a bit then uses the excuse of "i was looking at porn". I was soooo mad that this scene made it seem okay to look at porn, by using it as an excuse. Ugh. I was so upset. 

Yes, yes, yes! Thank you for your honesty! Very brave of you. I love that you brought up that the images are there!!! They will pop up randomly and it is quite the battle to remove them! Even after repentance and you are clean, that is the one thing that can remain. I know that we can fast, and pray, and fast and pray to remove those thoughts and I know the Lord will help us. So, in my opinion that is the worst side effect of porn. My brother watches porn and is severely addicted. And he wonders why his wife can't do those things for him. Addictions, of any kind, can and will destroy marriages and relationships. This topic should never be treated casually. But with boldness and love. 
One more thought: i watched the new spider man movie the other day and a part came up where peters best friend was on the computer in the library alone trying to help him find out information. The librarian comes in and tells him he should not be in there. He stammers a bit then uses the excuse of "i was looking at porn". I was soooo mad that this scene made it seem okay to look at porn, by using it as an excuse. Ugh. I was so upset. 

In my mind, this is the key.  Have you ever played games with him?  Why do you hate it so much?  Has your husband exhibited destructive behaviors related to playing video games? Is it taking time away from you and things that you want to do together?  Would you feel the same if he was watching TV instead?  If not, they are both unproductive wastes of time, so why not?
Depending on the situation, this may be your need to come to the realization that it's okay, or it could be his need to realize he's overdoing it, or both.  From the way you wrote your initial inquiry, it sounds more like the first.  Regardless, the most effective way to reduce his game time could be to give him a better alternative, such as something that he likes doing together with you.  ← That is not a sexual reference, but it certainly could include that at times.

Back when I had my "spiritual awakening" last September one of the things I noticed was that video games made those spiritual feelings go right out the door, and I didn't even rage at this point.
I used to be addicted to RuneScape and World of Warcraft. I would wake up with my hands shaking because I had to play.  When I played World of Warcraft, I would slam the desk and scream and yell at whatever the current matter was (was usually Lay on Hands.) 
As far as I'm concerned, there's no way to justify video games as an activity, be they often or occasional. 
If you really ponder why we are here and the principals of happiness. You may find that it's difficult justifying video games in this probation.
I've given them up, but I don't judge people who play them or who don't think as I do.
I should add, my use of video games was 100% escapist and I had larger problems, and it wasn't the video games, they were only a symptom. Also, I became addicted to pornography during my addiction to World of Warcraft, more escapism and more covering my problems in dopamine. But the heaviest exposure to pornography came through HBO, not the computer. HBO was the gateway and I eventually moved to PC for my porn (plus I had an even older masturbation problem.) 
Sidenote, I thought Dark Souls 2 was terrible and lazy.

Yeah; the difference strikes me as pretty pedantic.  If you think you aren't addicted--fine, then; stop using.  Just stop it!  Talk to your bishop and move on; case closed.
But if you find yourself coming back to it, in contravention of the better angels of your nature--guess what?  You're probably addicted; and even if you aren't *addicted* in the clinical sense of the word--working the Church's 12-step addiction recovery program (which is really just a university-level course on repentance) isn't going to do you any harm.
The OP's bishop was nicer than I would have been to these folks.  I probably would have been tempted to reply "And when was *your* most recent porn use, brother?"

I don't think there is a casual use of pornography, honestly. Gonna be a little vulnerable here but when I returned to church, I had a lot of work to do to become temple worthy again. I wrote erotica online during my inactive years. And like any good writer...I researched the material. There was stuff that I was definitively innocent about before I decided to write these subjects and even at one point during the last year of my attendance before becoming inactive, I even told myself that I was just "informing" myself, that my ignorance was a weakness. How I wish I could have a pure mind again... Some days I am incredibly saddened by what I did, even though the repentance process for those particular sins is over and I have shut the door on that chapter in my life, with the help of the Savior. There are some things I will never again be able to close the door on. Because once you see it...it's in there, like a little mag you carry around with you forever. You can put it on a shelf or put it away, you can choose to not partake when the adversary whips it out at inappropriate times but it will always be a bunch of pictures that you own.