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Found 5 results

  1. So end of July I get married to an amazing man. I wish I had an idealized body for him to enjoy, which I don't; stress has me eating things I normally would not, and my current knee sprain injury is making workouts difficult to nonexistent; I am nervous about becoming a stepmom to his wonderful kids; I fear not having enough money in the future, a fear I've had most of my life; I'm ADHD and organizing all the details and remembering everything to be done is dreadfully challenging for me; part of me wanted to elope and avoid all the planning and prep work; we will be moving out-of-state the day after the wedding, and trimming away unnecessary things is hard, knowing what to take and what to let go; I'm doing my parents' remodel's finish work, and I still have base boards, back splash, refinish the deck, caulking, and touch up painting to do; currently out of Claritin-D; my wedding plans by default cannot be finalized until my fiance and I receive a clearance letter for his first sealing. The stress and anxiety feels borderline paralyzing at times. Any words of wisdom, talks, articles, scriptures, mantras ?
  2. EllieBelle2015

    BYU-I Don’t

    I’m in my senior year at Brigham Young University-Idaho and I’ve recently been dating a young man who is also a senior. We’re both starting to worry that if we don’t find a spouse now, we’ll never find a spouse. Because of this, there’s a lot of pressure to commit. I enjoy spending time with him, but we’ve had some trouble communicating our expectations and needs, and it’s resulted in us breaking up once already. We both recognized that we needed to spend more time getting to know one another and less time cuddling, etc. We ended up getting together last night, just to communicate and connect on a personal level. The evening ended in the pushing of the boundaries of the Law of Chastity. We talked about it this morning and both agreed that it can’t happen again. I like this young man, but I don’t feel an emotional connection with him. I’m attracted to him physically, but not emotionally. I don’t know if I need to break this relationship off completely. I don’t want to hurt him, but I don’t know that I’ll ever love him, because I’m not emotionally available due to being hung up on a past love. If I stay with him, I’m afraid it would be purely physical and pushing the boundaries would lead to us eventually breaking the Law of Chastity completely. What do I do?
  3. My wedding day is in a week and I am freaking out. I feel so lost and confused. I feel hopeless. Last year during this time I was dating a boy who I was absolutely crazy about. I thought he was the one. I thought he was the answers to my prayers. But things went sour and he broke up with me because I didn't serve a mission. I was completely crushed. My confidence was gone. So I went home for the summer to heal. I remember praying to Heavenly Father that he would send me someone to marry. A week later I met Kyle. Kyle wasn't necessarily my type. But I ended up going out with him anyways. I honestly thought he would just be a summer fling. But as the time went on, and summer ended I still liked him. It took me about a month to decide to whether I wanted to date him exclusively. I had a hard time letting go of my "type." But I decided I had nothing to lose so I went for it. A few weeks later I was diagnosis with a horrible illness. During this time I was devastated. But Kyle was completely there for me. He treated me like I was god's gift to this earth. I have never felt so whole. Fast forward a few months.. we started talking about marriage. At first I was really excited. But soon after my feelings changed to nerves. I had no reason to be nervous. He had no signs of red flags.I'm just a constant thinker. I over analyze everything. I kept thinking, "well what if there's someone else out there for me? Someone more my 'type'?" At this point I was praying and fasting and I felt like I received good impressions. Yet I was still hesitant and nervous. Anyways, one night out of the blue he asked me to marry him. I was completely shocked. I wasn't ready. But I said yes anyways because I felt like I received answers. Our engagement has been so difficult. Some days I feel confident in my choice, and other days I feel very scared. I have had several anxiety attacks. He has been uptight and insecure (because he knows that I've been so back and forth about marrying him.) I feel so stressed out. All the time. He keeps picking fights with me over the little things. Like what birth control to use. I am a very tender hearted person so these fights are making my nerves worst. I have called the wedding planning off two times. I honestly don't know what to think anymore. His temper frightens me. I went to conference asking Heavenly Father to give me reassurance that this was right. The first talk of the session was Bednar's talk on fear. I felt so at peace and I wrote in my journal that I marrying Kyle was the best choice I could make. A few weeks later we had another big fight. Afterwards I was having so many doubts. We went to the park and I told Kyle my concerns. He told me this was normal and asked a lady at the park about her engagement. She described a story almost identical to ours. I felt like that was Heavenly Father giving me reassurance again. The other day we got in another huge fight over something so small. He is very high strung. I feel so hopeless and terrified. After every fight he is very apologetic, and says he will try to do better. And I want to believe him. He is very spiritual. But I am just WORRIED. I can't keep doing this. I literally don't know what to do. The wedding is in a week. It is hard to feel excited when I feel so down. He tells me to follow the promoting I received in the beginning. I don't know what to think. Would Heavenly Father give me peace about our relationship if it wasn't right? Did his answer change? Is it just Satan? Will this go away after we get married? I feel paralyzed. Moving forward doesn't feel good. Breaking up doesn't feel good. I feel empty. Someone, anyone please help me.
  4. EarlJibbs

    Child Anxiety Disorder?

    Okay, so I will take advice from anyone. But if there are any other parents out there going through this, I could really use advice. I apologize that this post is going to be long, but I wanted to make sure it is understood. My 7 year old daughter (super precious to me and completely adorable) has really bad anxiety attacks. For those of you that are not familiar with it, let me give you an real life example. It was bed time and my daughter was in bed, I kiss her goodnight and ask her casually, "so what did you have for lunch today?" She responds, then I ask "do you know if you are going to have hot or cold lunch tomorrow?" (referencing if she was going to bring a lunch or eat one provided at school. She then looks at me like I said something insulting and yells "I don’t know!" and starts breathing heavy and panicking. I then reassure her that it's fine and we will figure it out and change the subject to something that she doesn’t have to respond to. Mind you it isn’t all the time, but it can be small things like this that set her off. Normally they are followed by what you would consider a normal tantrum, but at the peak of screaming stomping feet, breathing heavy, inaudible speech where it normally turns into a regular sob and seeking for comfort, it continues. Sometimes for 20+ minutes. Here is what we have done to try to get help. 1. We have gone to our pediatrician and she gave us a prescribed a small dose of medicine that "could" help. We have seen a help in regards to how frequent the major outbursts are, but seem to make the outbursts worse when they do happen 2. We tried a psychologist (no medicine involved). We did weekly visits for over a month, but stopped because it was not helping. The psychologist solely tried to help her deal with the feelings, which was good, but we felt that we as parents needed to be taught to help her deal with those feelings and how we should react or deal with them. 3. Pray and Fast. We have been going through this for about a year now and she is always in our prayers and when we fast it involves her. Any suggestions? I feel bad that at the tender age of 7 she may need higher concentrations of medicine and use of a psychiatrist (uses medicine). If anyone else has been dealing with this I could use a couple if lines for support. Thanks everyone!
  5. WorthofaSoul

    Introvert Anxiety

    So I know I've written a lot, if it's TL;DR, that's ok here's the main question. For people with anxiety over being the center-of-attention, what are good ways to get over it? (My farewell's coming up in 2-3 weeks, I don't really have time for therapy and certainly no meds, etc. So what's a good way to naturally deal with having to talk with people about me, about my mission, the whole crying about "Oh I remember just yesterday, you were just a baby and now you're going on a mission..." etc?) I'm not usually a big center-of-attention person. In fact, I hate it. I mean, I'm all excited for other people having the spotlight and even love playing it up for them, but for me I hate it. There are certain times when it's kind of ok, like giving talks or testimony meeting I don't mind so much, but making something special about me kind of makes me want to throw up (having my parents invite all of the family to my mission call opening was hard enough) So when I was preparing to get my endowments out for my mission, my parents and I ended up getting into a discussion about family. I brought up the fact I really wasn't looking to have my aunts and uncles there and even requested that my grandma and Great-grandma be there (because of course what do grandma's do? Throw a big fuss and love putting a lot of attention on their grandchildren) I ended up having an emotional breakdown on the phone with my parents and eventually over time I did concede to at least have my grandmas there with rules that if I was overwhelmed by the whole experience and by everyone I could be left to sit alone in a corner of the Celestial Room, etc. So fast-forward to the present. I have my endowments out now and the trip to the temple was fine. But I have come to find out that my grandma, even though my parents told her that I was feeling anxious and didn't want a crowd, actually invited all of my family to the temple that day. (Due to various reasons such as sickness, the death of an in-law, etc. they couldn't make it) And said to my dad in regards to me "Well, it's a public place, if everyone just happens to show up for a session at the exact same time it can't be helped, can it?" I am hurt that she did this, even if she might not have know the severity of my anxieties. I'm also grateful of how things did turn out, but I'm upset over what could have happened. If my relatives had shown up, I would have been so much more stressed out and I also probably would've been angry at my parents, especially my dad (he was a big pusher for trying to invite family to events) and in that case, when I had gone with him to participate in the prayer I would have had to withdrawn because I would've had ill-feelings towards him and then I would've been humiliated having to sit down in front of everyone and then having everyone wonder and maybe ask why I did that. And what would the explanation be? "Oh, I'm sorry, I was upset because I didn't really want any of you to be here..." So I feel like I have two problems: How should I talk to my grandma about this?Is there a way to get over some of this center-of-attention anxiety?I know we're usually more self-conscious of ourselves and notice more that we do than others, but I can get anxious over happy things as well. Like thoughts of getting married and having my extended family watch me get sealed and have a reception makes me want to throw up. But more urgently, what am I'm going to do for my farewell? The talk will be fine, but I don't do the whole partying/talking to people, especially not if I'm in anyway part of the focus. But that's the whole point of a farewell, and there's really no way of not having a gathering with my family, so what am I to do?