Regrets

[Dee23]

This past year has been a struggle for me and my family especially my dear children:Israel and Emmanuel. Their father and I were divorced last year and I am regretting it deeply---as at the time I was deep into my own selfishness and did not think about how the children would be affected. I am currently with someone right now, who is not very supportive in many things that I do--attending church, going to school, working---(as I am the only one who is employed in the home). Sometimes I feel stuck and am not sure what to do. My ex-husband and I have both expressed sorrow for the choices that we made and have thought about working it out, even though it would be a long road of healing, forgiveness, and the re establishment of trust. Even though I cherish the relationship I have with my current boyfriend I have realized, that it's not a healthy one at all. I have just had a lot on my heart and just need to be able to vent/talk somewhere where I know that I can find comfort and peace. Thank you everyone for listening.

Depree

[NeuroTypical]

at the time I was deep into my own selfishness and did not think about how the children would be affected.

Dang, I wish there was a way to write this in big firely letters across the sky where people can see it.

I hope your kids are doing better.

LM

[spiritseeker]

Let me begin by saying my heart goes ou to you and your children. Give yourself some credit for realizing the mistakes you have made with the divorce and the children. Then comes the most difficult part.... forgive yourself. It sounds to me like the relationship you are in now is not the best for you or the children. You say it would be alot of work to fix your broken marriage . But it seems to me it might be worth a try. I could be wrong but it sounds like there is still love there. I can sense the Spirit is working in and through you , listen to it. I am here if you need to vent or talk. You can PM me anytime and please know I will keep you all in my prayers.

[john doe]

I think you know what you should do, you just need to gather the courage to actually do it.

[jameslentz]

Hi Dee,

My heart goes out to you and I hope that you can find a way, find the courage to act on what you and your ex-husband are talking about. I would advise you to ask in prayer that it might be confirmed to you and your ex-husband that it is the right course to follow. I believe that will make it easier for you. I believe that Heavenly Father loves families. Families are the core unit in the organization of this existence. With the recognition that you have of mistakes and effort needed you are well on your way to healing your family.

I wish you well dear sister.

[Hemidakota]

This past year has been a struggle for me and my family especially my dear children:Israel and Emmanuel. Their father and I were divorced last year and I am regretting it deeply---as at the time I was deep into my own selfishness and did not think about how the children would be affected. I am currently with someone right now, who is not very supportive in many things that I do--attending church, going to school, working---(as I am the only one who is employed in the home). Sometimes I feel stuck and am not sure what to do. My ex-husband and I have both expressed sorrow for the choices that we made and have thought about working it out, even though it would be a long road of healing, forgiveness, and the re establishment of trust. Even though I cherish the relationship I have with my current boyfriend I have realized, that it's not a healthy one at all. I have just had a lot on my heart and just need to be able to vent/talk somewhere where I know that I can find comfort and peace. Thank you everyone for listening.

Depree

Keep venting....

[Islander]

When one is lonely hungry, cold or thirsty you'd be surprised the choices we make to try and satisfy our need. Once the time of crisis passes we say "did I do that? eeeeek!!!"

Your current relationship is a band aid. You have feelings of need that are satisfied by this relationship but you are realizing it is not and will never be enough. It is a humbling experience but be strong in order to be honest and call it for what it is. Do what you know you have to do and call it quits. It does not make you a bad person, it does not mean that you are cold hearted witch. Do not listen to Satan but to the Spirit that is leading you to repentance and do the right thing for you and your children.

And go talk to your bishop, get some serious counseling and start working on putting your marriage back together.

My prayers are with you.

[Elphaba]

This past year has been a struggle for me and my family especially my dear children:Israel and Emmanuel. Their father and I were divorced last year and I am regretting it deeply. . . .

I think it is indicative of your honesty that you regret your divorce after only one year. It takes most divorced couples years to eventually regret their decision, if regret ever enters the picture. I think this is because the resulting pain associated with the reasons for the divorce can be paralyzing, and not easily forgiven until one heals enough to do so.

I'm not saying people should not get divorces, as I think there are many times when they should. Unfortunately, these things are extremely complicated, and the reasons are rarely black and white.

I have no advice for you. I just think it says a lot about your character that both you and your husband recognize how your divorce has affected your entire family. Again, I think it takes many divorced couples years to get to that place.

Good luck with whatever decisions you make.

Elphaba

[slabbing]

Wow, this is like a chilling foreshadow of what's about to happen to our little family. I, like others who have responded, feel for you and at the same time plead with you to follow the Spirit. And if you're not sure about messages you're getting, whether or not they're from the Spirit...then get the Spirit back in your life :)! Do whatever it takes, stop at nothing. I like what Elder Corbridge of the seventy said in a recent general conference - that every good thing in our lives depends on us getting and retaining the Holy Ghost to guide us.

Please, from somone who is about to have a divorce and broken family thrust upon him against his will, find out what Heavenly Father's will is concerning what you should do! Good luck.