Humility - Where is the fine line?

[pam]

I was doing some research for my website and lds.org has this to say concerning humility:

To be humble is to recognize gratefully our dependence on the Lord—to understand that we have constant need for His support. Humility is an acknowledgment that our talents and abilities are gifts from God. It is not a sign of weakness, timidity, or fear; it is an indication that we know where our true strength lies. We can be both humble and fearless. We can be both humble and courageous.

So, I got to thinking. Where is the line drawn in humility when it comes to say something like the workplace? How many of you have had to do those self evaluations? I hate them with a passion knowing that part of my evaluation is based on the good things I have to say about myself. I have a difficult time with them even when I know what I'm saying is fact. At times it seems to contradict the meaning of humility. Or do I need to think of it as lds.org has it? To understand that our gifts are gifts from the Lord?

Your thoughts?

[Wingnut]

Humility doesn't mean self-deprecation. If we accept the premise that God has given us everything we have, we probably also accept the premise that we are able to magnify our talents. If I have the talent to be a good photographer, then with a lot of practice and study and observation, I can become a great photographer (something I'm working on, by the way). And then if someone asks me what is a talent I have that I could really share with someone else (or the job interview question about strengths), I can honestly say that I'm a good photographer. I probably won't say "great" or "fantastic," partly because that's in the eye of the beholder, but I know that I've put in the effort myself. You can be pleased and happy without being proud.

Great topic for discussion, by the way.

[pam]

Perhaps it's more in the way of phrasing it?

[pam]

This isn't just about evaluations mind you. Just a topic of how to have humility but to stress our talents and skills as well.

[Justice]

Here's a real life experience that will help express what I have learned about this topic, Pam.

In my former occupation I was a Mechanical Designer and assisted engineers in the design of our new products. There was one particular challenge that 4 engineers were working on and trying to solve. What marketing wanted seemed impossible. They were working on a way to...

"...hinge the cover to the tank of the machine with as few additional pieces as necessary. The hinge had to also separate easily so the cover could be removed without a tool and taken to a deep sink and cleaned. Then it had to easily and quickly assemble back in place for use."

Also keep in mind that they were working with a narrow ledge all the way around the mating surface and the joint could not break vacuum.

When I first heard what they were trying to do I understood why they had 4 engineers on it and why they hadn't come up with anything acceptable after 4 months. They were just about give up and change the design of the machine to a more conventional approach. One of the engineers recommended to the engineering manager that he let me give it a try. I had worked closely with this engineer on many projects and he knew my knack for getting him out of a design bind.

Well, he agreed and said "give him a week."

It was nearing the end of the week and all I could think about was how impossible it was. Near mid-day of the last day, I decided I wasn't going to solve this on my own. I bowed my head at my desk and sincerely "gave up" to the Lord, knowing it was impossible for me to do on my own. I asked for His help in coming up with a solution that would satisfy all the design criteria.

I no sooner looked up at my computer screen after the prayer when this flood of information was "downloaded" to my brain. I saw clearly in my mind the answer.

The answer revealed to me was so absolutely amazing... look what happened:

I had learned a way to meet all the design criteria above with NO additional pieces; not even a hinge, binding strap, or not even so much as a screw or a threaded metal insert which can be tricky to manufacture. Plus, it gave them a few added features that they didn't even think of. The idea that downloaded to my brain showed me how to accomplish it, and all I had to do was get the features required added to the tank and cover, which took approximately 2 hours. It was so unique and different than anything I had ever done before, it was clear to me it wasn't my idea.

About the time I finished, the engineer I had worked so close with walked by and said "Any luck?" I said that it wasn't luck but yeah, I had a possible solution drawn out. When he saw the solution, he was so amazed that he called everyone who had worked on the project, even marketing, to show them the answer. They immediately realized it was so unique and addressed all their concerns, and then some, in a way never devised before that they said, "get a patent."

After everyone left, he told me it was utterly amazing and asked how I did it. I told him that it wasn't me, that when I realized I couldn't do it on my own I prayed for help. He looked at me stunned for a moment and said, "Let's not tell anyone else, OK?"

I learned that no matter how good I am at anything in my life, no matter how many skills I learn or talents I exercise, there will always come a time when I need the Lord to get me past something. It's OK to realize your gifts and talents, as long as you remember where they came from, and know that when you reach the end of your abilities you can rely on the Lord. Not just that He CAN help you, but that He WILL.

Edited October 31, 2009 by Justice

[Traveler]

My thoughts:

In the Book of Mormon Alma ask a rather interesting question. He asks, “Have you been stripped of your pride?” Could he not have said something like, “have you put pride aside?”

Being humble and “separated” from pride is not really a voluntary thing although a person must be willing. This is because it is not something that we can accomplish on our own or should I say through or own will or perceived or believed in agency. It is also a very painful process. But at the same time it is not a debasing process and it is not failure or initiated by feelings of failure so much as recognizing all you are capable of – is good but not good enough. It is life’s greatest accomplishment because we come the closest we can in mortality to understanding G-d and his will. And it never comes as a feeling of being better or able to accomplish more than someone else. It is not just a connection and drawing on the power and goodness from G-d because it is also a connection and drawing of power and goodness from your fellow man or even children and lastly it is not about you.

May I add one last thought? Humility is not about believing in salvation on an individual basis. It is the understanding that salvation is about we and in terms of all of us and not about the me and I.

Have you been stripped of your pride? – Pride is strange thing – if you think you are done and over it – that is the greatest prideful mistake possible.

The Traveler

[Seminarysnoozer]

I was doing some research for my website and lds.org has this to say concerning humility:

So, I got to thinking. Where is the line drawn in humility when it comes to say something like the workplace? How many of you have had to do those self evaluations? I hate them with a passion knowing that part of my evaluation is based on the good things I have to say about myself. I have a difficult time with them even when I know what I'm saying is fact. At times it seems to contradict the meaning of humility. Or do I need to think of it as lds.org has it? To understand that our gifts are gifts from the Lord?

Your thoughts?

I am laughing because I remember putting on those things, "My best quality is that I am humble." then left the rest blank. Nobody ever said anything about it to me, so I don't know how they took it.

[john doe]

When they hand out the self-evaluations at my work, I always rank myself in the top of every category. I figure that if my boss disagrees they will tell me and put their score on it too. I have found that most of the time they agree with my assessment, and are only too happy to give me credit where it is due during that process. The self-evaluation form is a way to get you to think about how you think you do your job. If you don't have high standards or think you are falling short of reachable goals, they will tend to agree with you and your chances for advancement can go down as a result.

But aside from that, I'm proud to say I'm probably the most humble person I know.

[rayhale]

I do feel that it can be confusing and frustrating to balance being humble and climbing the corporate ladder. For example at my work I was evaluated for a raise, the manager a list of things to rate me on, it was on a 1-5 level, he said that he never gives anyone a 5 since he feels everyone, including himself, has room to improve. I do feel that a person can go too far being humble, for example a person not getting a Masters Degree since that person did want to be a master at anything, or a rich person humbling himself to the point of living in a trailer park, and giving all his money to charity.

[jadams_4040]

I was doing some research for my website and lds.org has this to say concerning humility:

So, I got to thinking. Where is the line drawn in humility when it comes to say something like the workplace? How many of you have had to do those self evaluations? I hate them with a passion knowing that part of my evaluation is based on the good things I have to say about myself. I have a difficult time with them even when I know what I'm saying is fact. At times it seems to contradict the meaning of humility. Or do I need to think of it as lds.org has it? To understand that our gifts are gifts from the Lord?

Your thoughts?

I dont have to worry about that myself; God "ALWAYS" reminds me.:)

[beefche]

But aside from that, I'm proud to say I'm probably the most humble person I know.

Oh Lord it's hard to be humble

When you're perfect in every way

[Wingnut]

Perhaps it's more in the way of phrasing it?

Partly. One can still be falsely humble. One can pretend to be humble for the sake of appearing so. I think it comes down to attitude.

[ferretrunner]

I was doing some research for my website and lds.org has this to say concerning humility:

So, I got to thinking. Where is the line drawn in humility when it comes to say something like the workplace? How many of you have had to do those self evaluations? I hate them with a passion knowing that part of my evaluation is based on the good things I have to say about myself. I have a difficult time with them even when I know what I'm saying is fact. At times it seems to contradict the meaning of humility. Or do I need to think of it as lds.org has it? To understand that our gifts are gifts from the Lord?

Your thoughts?

I think everyone hates those employee self-evaluations.

There's a difference between bragging and being boastful and acknowledging your skills, contributions, and abilities. If you are reporting a set of facts: I completed projects a,b,and c, and I brought 50 new customers into the business, etc. - that's not the same as bragging. Part of the difference is motivation: are you seeking attention, seeking to take something away from someone else, or factfully reporting on the good work you've done? Are you trying to draw attention to yourself?

Our talents are gifts. But, like gifts, we have to work to develop them. You can't get the "goody" in the present without unwrapping it, right? I can be a great musician, but if I don't practice and develop the gift, I wouldn't make good on the talent.

[Seminarysnoozer]

For these same reasons I think it would be very difficult to be a mormon lawyer, not to change the topic. I know there are and have been many general authorities that are lawyers but that is a career that seems to be loaded with having to prove all the time that one is the 'authority' of any given subject, even arguing in court "I know without any once of doubt, so and so murdered so and so." Its hard to see how humility mixes with that kind of atmosphere of having to claim you know more than the other side and that you are always right. It would be hard to go into court with "I'm pretty sure my client is right, but there are many holes in his story, so I'm not 100% sure, and since he is paying me to represent him I really want to believe his story."

I think it is best to choose careers that don't entail that kind of challenge. Just like I waited tables for a while at a restaurant that served alcohol. The owner wanted us to have a good knowledge of all the types of wine and beer served. I couldn't get myself to say; " I really recommend our locally brewed beer ..." So, I moved on to a different job. I think if the job requires a lot of 'gnawing' your way up the corporate ladder, I would say thats not a good job for a Mormon, or you just do the best you can and maybe the atmosphere will change with your example.