Clearing up Sins before leaving?

[questions67]

Hey guys,

I had a girlfriend with whom i participated in the precursors to sex with for over a year... Its been a year now since then, the reason for breaking up was largely for one reason- I was Mormon and wanted to stop these practices, and she wasn't mormon and didnt want to stop. Well, to be honest, I never really felt like i HAD to go to the bishop because I already told myself I would never do this stuff again (I say "HAD", cause now i wish i did)....I felt that there was no reason to talk to him since I myself have already repented on my own, and went through the guilt, and eventually I felt the spirit again.

So here's the issue: Yesterday I had my interview with the Bishop and Stake President about receiving the Melchezidek Priesthood. I told them that I wanted to wait because I do not full-heatedly believe the process of eternal progression yet, which is true- I haven't gained a testimony of it of yet. However, I feel there's an underlying reason-My past sexual sins.

You see, Now i really want to tell them, but i Know if i do, I Will not be able to attend BYU-Provo, for which im leaving for in 2 weeks...Ill be an incoming Freshmen.

I wish so bad that I cleared up these sexual sins earlier when I thought i didnt have to, because now I feel like if I tell the Bishop or Stake President about my sins, I will be revoked from being able to attend BYU (Honor Code/Endorsements from Bishop discuss sexual purity).

I dont really know what advice im looking for becuase im in such a huge can of worms, but any is appreciated....

THanks for reading such a long post.

[NeuroTypical]

Go tell your Bishop. You'll be happy you did for the rest of your life.

[Maya]

Yes it is ALWAYS best to clarify everything all the way as soon as possible. Ols sins that one has not clared all the way trough keep popping up in unconvinient times. I can see your delemma. Is the BYU really so strict? I mean you have not doen anything for a year... confessing it might help you to keep clean in future not confessing might help you to do it again... after all it is a year a go it was ... right! Hard nut! All I can say is that you DO feel much better if you confess to the bishop... maybe it wont go any further... and then you have someone to help you forward....

[tubaloth]

Bringing this up here shows you want to confess them to somebody. The problem is confessing them to us, isn't the Lords way or Repentance. You can confess them to a bunch of people, but unless it goes through the ones the Lord has appointed it doesn't count.

Talk to your bishop, tell him the guilt of not doing this sooner is why you are there (which sounds to be true).

Realizing you might loose out on BYU this semester, but Hopefully it won't keep you from a mission.

You already regret waiting this long. The regret can only get worst!

[Just_A_Guy]

I can't make any promises on behalf of the Honor Code office, but I suspect they see this kind of thing all the time--but people aren't being sent home right and left (or at least they weren't, when I was a student).

I think loss of the ecclesiastical endorsement is only required when you're being disfellowshipped or ex'ed. Since you didn't have the Melchizedek Priesthood when you slipped up, I'd be flabbergasted if either of those happened to you.

[kimiko]

Go talk to your bishop!!! Yes, it's going to be difficult, but the fact that you WANT to talk to him shows you already know why it's important. Just get it over with and move forward with the repentance process and your life. You'll be so thankful that you did.

[questions67]

ahh i know i need to do it but im soo scared. My bday is in 2 days as well. That will be a great thing to tell my mom on my bday... "hey mom, thanks for the presents, but btw I've been denied admittance to BYU first semester becuase i lied during my Ecclestiastical Endorsement." Haha, kinda comical when you look at in a sarcastic sense.

[john doe]

What is more important, living a lie and trying to fool everyone including yourself, or being clean in the eyes of the Lord and suffering the consequences of taking advantage of the Atonement?

[jayanna]

here is my take on it...your Bishop has someone else talking to him besides you, the Holy Ghost, if it were so serious that the endorsement would not be given, I'm pretty sure he would have been prompted to dig deeper...that being said, you should talk to him regardless, otherwise you will walk around campus, attending classes, feeling like you don't deserve to be there, even if you really do.

I'm sure that he would be more proud of you overcoming your weaknesses, first with that girlfriend, and second, fear of the consequences.

You made the right choice in quitting that whole scene...the atonement has cleansed you of that, I'm sure your Bishop has a full appreciation of the atonement. Talk to him.

[spamlds]

ahh i know i need to do it but im soo scared. My bday is in 2 days as well. That will be a great thing to tell my mom on my bday... "hey mom, thanks for the presents, but btw I've been denied admittance to BYU first semester becuase i lied during my Ecclestiastical Endorsement." Haha, kinda comical when you look at in a sarcastic sense.

If you were to sit back and analyze your comments with some degree of detachment, you'd realize that your primary consideration is what other people think about you (your parents, your bishop, the stake president). What about what the Lord thinks?

He is real. The Church just isn't a club for people who pretend to be righteous. It's a place where we come to deal with our humanity, our weaknesses, and bring them to the Lord.

You've been taught since you were young that there are standards and that there are consequences to violating those standards. Going to the bishop and confessing your mistakes would be the first truly adult decision you will have made in your life. It's probably the first true act of faith you've ever done on your own.

I don't care what time it is when you read this in your time zone. Put down your computer and go talk to your father. Then call your bishop. It doesn't matter if it's late. Call him. Tell him you need to speak with him as soon as possible.

Don't care what people think about you. Think only what your Heavenly Father expects. Go to him with humility and admit your errors. He promises that he will forgive you because Jesus Christ has already died to pay for your mistakes. This will show faith in Jesus Christ and it will be pleasing unto him. It might be painful to do. If so, welcome to the real world.

Jesus said it is better to to "pluck out an eye" or "cut off a hand" that offends and to enter the kingdom of heaven without them. In the worst case, if you were to have to wait a year to go to BYU, it would be better to "enter the kingdom" of God without schooling than to be an educated, faithless sinner. The sooner you get this resolved, the better you're going to feel. Your family will stand by you. The Lord loves you and he will forgive you.

There are more important things in life than going to BYU.

[pam]

Awesome response

[questions67]

If you were to sit back and analyze your comments with some degree of detachment, you'd realize that your primary consideration is what other people think about you (your parents, your bishop, the stake president). What about what the Lord thinks?

He is real. The Church just isn't a club for people who pretend to be righteous. It's a place where we come to deal with our humanity, our weaknesses, and bring them to the Lord.

You've been taught since you were young that there are standards and that there are consequences to violating those standards. Going to the bishop and confessing your mistakes would be the first truly adult decision you will have made in your life. It's probably the first true act of faith you've ever done on your own.

I don't care what time it is when you read this in your time zone. Put down your computer and go talk to your father. Then call your bishop. It doesn't matter if it's late. Call him. Tell him you need to speak with him as soon as possible.

Don't care what people think about you. Think only what your Heavenly Father expects. Go to him with humility and admit your errors. He promises that he will forgive you because Jesus Christ has already died to pay for your mistakes. This will show faith in Jesus Christ and it will be pleasing unto him. It might be painful to do. If so, welcome to the real world.

Jesus said it is better to to "pluck out an eye" or "cut off a hand" that offends and to enter the kingdom of heaven without them. In the worst case, if you were to have to wait a year to go to BYU, it would be better to "enter the kingdom" of God without schooling than to be an educated, faithless sinner. The sooner you get this resolved, the better you're going to feel. Your family will stand by you. The Lord loves you and he will forgive you.

There are more important things in life than going to BYU.

Really great response. My father is deceased, died when I was young, but im going to talk to my sister.

I really loved your response, and thank you for it, but its easier saying that BYU and an education isn't as important than actually following through with losing it. I've worked my butt off so hard these past 4 years of high school so that I can attend a 4 year university...i dont want to end up at a community college after all my work...i know its selfish.. Im gunna talk to my bishop, just got his cell phone number... but i ahve one last question..

Would it be harmful in waiting the 2 weeks and talking to my new bishop? tell me straight.

[Moksha]

Do a lot of relationships at BYU end in reporting?

[questions67]

Do a lot of relationships at BYU end in reporting?

dont get what you mean, sorry, i must just be really tired. could you explain?

[Roseslipper]

i too agree with what the others have said, you should confess now, as hard as it might be, it will be harder if you put it off. And if u will not be able to go to byu as planned,so let it be. You can go to another school, and transfer to byu later if needed. Ive known people to put these matters off for yrs. and it just gets harder and harder. But if u know the church is true u will take what ever penalities u might have too. And what ever embrassement that might come. And hold your head up high,knowing u did what u had too, live thru it and grew stronger in your faith, and more closier to you Heavenly Father And Savior and their great plan of Happiness, which entails all. And more knowledgeable about the Atonement. THe Most Important thing is to have the Godhead on your side. the confessing part wont be as hard as u think. I know this elderly sister she joined the church in her 50s. 6 yrs after she joined, she made a major slip. Her background from the church she came from well they didnt beleive u had to go tothe minister that it was bewteen u and GOd. so she never went. she did the repentance steps for yrshere are other true stories like this as well.....better to pay the pentalites now then later, for we neverknow when it will be to late.

[questions67]

i just want to let everyone know that after 2 hours of looking at my phone, i texted the bisiop telling him I want to meet him with him as soon as possible (hes a texter). I guess theres no going back, haha. Ill tell you guys how it goes after we meet.

thanks

[bl8tant]

i just want to let everyone know that after 2 hours of looking at my phone, i texted the bisiop telling him I want to meet him with him as soon as possible (hes a texter). I guess theres no going back, haha. Ill tell you guys how it goes after we meet.

thanks

Good luck. You're doing the right thing, and I know the Lord will bless you for your courage and faithfulness. Do let us know!

[Roseslipper]

Good Luck Brother... You made a wise choice. All things work out for the best if we let it.......no matter what...

[Roseslipper]

and you welcome, thats what brothers and sisters are for, to up lift each other, and help us each carry our own burdens.

[Maya]

i just want to let everyone know that after 2 hours of looking at my phone, i texted the bisiop telling him I want to meet him with him as soon as possible (hes a texter). I guess theres no going back, haha. Ill tell you guys how it goes after we meet.

thanks

YOU are my hero!

This is life... make mistakes and take the consiquenses like a man! Bless you!

[questions67]

i talked to the bishop this morning and it went really well. He said he's gunna pray and maybe talk to the stake president about "discipline" concerning when I should be able to receive the melchezedick priesthood, but im pretty sure im ok with BYU. Thanks for helping me take that extremely hard step and talking to the bishop. BTW, today is my bday and i guess there is nothing better than feeling no burden on my bday... :]