Inspired to have a child

[Chango]

I have a somewhat odd question to ask, yet I am curious, has anyone themselves or anyone they've known or known of had an experience where they prayed to know whether they should have another child and received the answer "no?" Instead of perhaps the overwhelmingly common response of "yes?"

[Gwen]

I know someone that while having difficulty conceiving they prayed about another child. They didn't get a "no" but a comforting "things will happen when it's time". They tried for a couple yrs before being able to conceive. I guess that's not really a "no" so much as a "not right now". Just before conceiving they prayed about if they should seek fertility assistance and the answer was "no".

Not quite what you were asking but the closest I got. lol

[classylady]

When my husband and I were trying to decide whether to have one more child, I knew this child would not have the same mother that the other six children had. I was in school full time. I knew I would probably be a working mother with this last child. After praying, I received a distinct answer "It's your choice". What? I wanted a definitive yes or no, not a "you get to choose". Well, I did choose. I chose to have one last baby. And he's been an absolute blessing and joy. He's now 19 years old. My pregnancy was difficult and had complications. After that child, I knew we were done. I didn't even need to pray again about another child. I knew my body couldn't handle another pregnancy. But, I also learned that the Lord was willing to let me decide whether if I could handle one more child. My answer of "It's your choice", was clear. I knew that if I chose "no" to another child, I would not have been condemned. The Lord was allowing me to decide for myself whether or not I could handle it.

Edited May 8, 2013 by classylady

[sarah331]

I have, but sort of in a roundabout way.

My husband and I both carry the gene for cystic fibrosis -- any offspring of ours have a 1:4 chance of having the disease, severity variable. We had an amnio with our twins so we could know for sure (CF kids sometimes need surgery right from birth, good to know in general to prepare doctors and clinics and meds and insurance, etc). We will not be having anymore biological children, as the risk in our opinion is too high.

When the boys were about 8/9 months old I started feeling very depressed about the fact that I wouldn't be pregnant again. I started looking into Mormonism soon after and started talking to our Heavenly Parents. One night I was so sad about it that I prayed and I felt this overwhelming peace come over and I knew that there was a reason we were only going to have two. I knew our family was complete. Our boys are thankfully healthy and we don't feel the need anymore to add to it -- as awesome as our kids may be :) I no longer feel sad, or doubt, that we aren't going to have more kids.

If, in the future, our feelings change I have also felt strongly that adoption is a route we can go. But it may not come to that.

[Traveler]

I have a somewhat odd question to ask, yet I am curious, has anyone themselves or anyone they've known or known of had an experience where they prayed to know whether they should have another child and received the answer "no?" Instead of perhaps the overwhelmingly common response of "yes?"

It has been my experiences that seldom will G-d give direct answers to question we present in our prayers. I believe that G-d intends that we study possibilities and consequences to questions we have and from our efforts make the best determination we can in coming to a resolution. Then in our prayers seek validation of our process and in essence ask if our efforts to come to a decision are satisfactory to G-d.

On occasions I have felt G-d’s support in a decision and then later felt that the question should be revisited. However, in direct answer to your question concerning children the choice was made with my wife. We considered the circumstances and came to the conclusion not to have children following what came about to be my wife’s last pregnancy and birth of what is now our youngest child.

I personally have never regretted our choice but I have been impressed that if we so desired and sought that we could have been blessed with another child – but not without consequences and sacrifices – mostly concerning my wife’s health. I have no regrets or concerns concerning our choice and I believe that it was indeed our choice and that G-d fully intended that we consider what was at stake and make a choice. I also feel that G-d was pleased that we chose to have 5 children and that our choice to not have a 6th child was acceptable to him and that he was pleased with the process we went through to make our decision.

The Traveler

[Guest]

I know someone whose bishop was inspired to tell them not to have any more children.

[Vort]

BYU, married student stake, 1988, stake conference. Stake president says roughly the following:

"You kids should not be using contraceptives. Contraceptives are contrary to God's plan. You should be like my wife and me. We have seven children. We have that many because we didn't use contraceptives; instead, we let the children come as they may. We let the LORD decide how many children we would have! And then when we had our seventh, we knew that was all the children the Lord wanted to send to us, so my wife had her tubes tied."

No kidding. I was there.

Maybe this former stake president received the revelation you speak of...

[MarginOfError]

I have two children. We're done. And I feel great about that decision.

Did I have the kind of revelation where God came down and told me "Thou shalt have no more children?" Nope. I just felt anxious when I thought about having more and I felt peace when I thought about not having more. That was good enough for me.

[Wingnut]

I have a friend who really wants another child, but has had prayer after prayer met with a resounding no. The last time I talked to her about it was about 2 years ago, actually (maybe more), and at the time, she told me that the answer she kept getting was "not right now." They have since, however, sold or given away all of their baby things.

[Guest]

I almost died giving birth to my first child. So, I thought that was definitely a No to the 2nd one. I prayed and I don't get a definite answer. My husband said he feels peace about a 2nd one. I told him, well, that's because you're not the one that almost died. But I thought I'd trust the answer to my husband's prayers.

I got pregnant. And during my visits with the doctor, the doctor recommended a scheduled c-section to lower the risk and we decided okay, and so he asked if I want to have the option of getting my tubes tied and I said maybe. I prayed about it and same thing, I don't get a definite answer.

I went to my scheduled c-section (culminating a very difficult pregnancy) and before I got to the ER, the doctor asked if I want to get my tubes tied and I asked him, what do you think? My doctor said, well, I think it's good if you go ahead with it because you're very high risk. I thought about it and I said, okay. So then, they performed the c-section (where I almost died again), my husband was there next to the doctor, the doctor asked us again, are you sure about the ligation, and my husband (who hasn't received a definite answer to his prayers either), asked the doctor, what do you think? The doctor says, I would recommend ligation but it's all up to you if you still want to have more children we'll prepare for it. And so my husband says, that's our answer. So I got the procedure done.

So basically, we considered the doctor as the answer to our prayers.

Edited May 8, 2013 by anatess