Aphrodite

I dont think lexish's problem is health related. I used to work at the airport half a mile from our house. I had to start work at 5am. I felt like Lexish-tired, sluggish-just constantly tired, i never had any energy-i slept when I got in at about 3ish till gone five. So basically my free time I slept. I was up at 4, home from work at 3, and slept till dinner. I may as well have had a 9-5 job. Basically, in my opinion, getting up that early on a regular basis, is just not good for you!!! Red bulls I would definitely stay away from too. They give you a quick hit then you come crashing down worse afterwards. I used to rely on red bull and coke to get me through nights, and ended up in A&E twice with heart palpitations! Lexish, try and get as much of a regular sleep pattern as you can. If you are in your senior year and its too much, I would give up seminary. You have your entire life to read and learn from the scriptures-you have one chance to be in high school and graduate for your career. Don't blow it by dragging yourself to seminary. I did seminary when I did have a testimony. I did two years then stopped. best decision I made-I never got anything from seminary other than constant fatigue. I studied my scriptures alone with the manual and got a lot more from it. x

you cant force him. Be supportive no matter what. Say to him, darling this is so hard for me and for us, but I love you and I will respect whatever decision you make. It may hurt to say that or feel like a lie as you feel upset and hurt, but that will help your husband, believe me. If he ever decides to come back he'll remember your support and love you all the more for it. Guilt tripping, or trying to force him or bargain him back to church will not work, and you will lose his respect as he will see it as you are more worried about him going to church than his feelings and your relationship. Perservere, and love him no matter what.

Thank you everyone for the birthday messages :) sorry I havent replied till now, i havent been online for a while. Gwen's baby was born on my birthday, which happens to be our national day too :) Im very proud of my English birthday. I had a great day and was treated to dinner, the circus, and Rob bought me a digital camera and a christina aguilera DVD. I got several books, another DVD of a sitcom I LOVE (Gavin and Stacey for you Brits) money which I bought hair extensions and and i-pod. so i did very well. I wish it was my birthday again!!!!!!

You are right Willow, we dont tend to have sacrament meeting first here. If this were me, sjdean, I might also ring ahead and ask the missionaries to meet me. If not, most wards have the missionaries and a member of the churches clergy 'on the door' to greet people. You can then do what Willow says, 'Im new here, can you tell me where to go first?' By the time you have arrived and made your prescence known Im pretty sure there will be many people willing to help you. What ward will you be attending, just out of curiosity??

So now you stoop to making comments based on someones culture. Thats not doing much to show you're not immature. What has coming from the UK or any country got to do with ANYTHING? An excuse used for a weak argument. And who said anything about dying for Quinn? I certainly never said that nor would do it. I am not full of venom for Boyd K Packer either. Get your facts straight-Typical coming from an American.

My husband is starting to have problems with the church too, and one of his biggies is this issue. He finds it difficult to accept how a loving God can distinguish his children into coloured categories of what they can and can not do. That sounds like the American government in the sixties, not God.....And are we not told that man will not be punished for Adam's transgression? So why are/were black people punished for CAIN'S transgression? Frankly this issue bugs me and does not sit right. I have many black friends and I often wonder how they can be members knowing they were shunned before the 70s. The whole issue makes me feel sick.

Whats truly sad MyDogSkip is an alleged Christian with a bigoted and judgemental attitude such as yours. No wonder LDS get a bad name with members like that. You can disagree with homesexuality, without spewing venom at an individuals work based on his lifestyle choice. Thats pure immaturity.

LOL leanne it wasnt just you, there were a few ladies on here who mentioned they dont wear make-up-each to their own of course! Im not the sort of person who has to have a full face on to step out the front door to take the rubbish out, but I do love to wear make-up, and the thought of life without it was making me break out into a cold sweat!!! lol

I think if you let one slip occasionally that statement is untrue. But if you swear like a trooper, maybe yes. Me and hubbys language is quite bad actually....I should sort it out in case I end up swearing in front of someone I really dont want to lol.

I don't see why the church would discourage it seeing how keen they are for us all to breed like rabbits. Some things are personal, and 'the church' cant have a stand on everything in your life. Its a very personal decision. I personally would only do it for my sister if she ever wanted me to, and only after I'd had a child of my own.

wow! Im impressed. We have several veggie families in my home ward and they all have 'perfect' kids lol. Just one thing-if they dont eat meat make sure they get enough proteins that meat offers through things such as beans and pulses. You can't cut out a food group without replacing it with something. Good for your kids tho, your wife must be an incredible example. Im probably a bit anal when it comes to food. I eat very healthily and try to enforce this to my husband who doesnt. I do worry at our differing views on food for when we have kids as there's no way in hell they are going to any fast food joints or eating rubbish processed or high fat food. But if DH is eating it-How can I enforce it? I personally would support your wife and dont try and tempt them with meat, they are living wonderfully. They will probably all be slim, healthy and heart disease will be as alien as the meat they shun. Good for them!!

wow! Im impressed. Wwe have several

Why should you have to show your financial situation to a Bishop? To PROVE you earn what you do? That would be so degrading and pountless when you can manage without paying tithing! I think that the saying 'pay your tithing and the church will help you out with the rest' is hilarious. So you give money only to have the exact amount given back to you! Id pay it, then walk in to the Bishops office and say, ok can I have my money back now!! I think that if you can manage on your income with not paying tithing, you should. I think paying tithing to then get assistance from the church is irresponsible. Are we not supposed to be self reliant???

So money for the very very rich church comes before feeding your kids?????? What sort of irresponsible Bishop would say something like that?? Your kids come BEFORE tithing. You are doing the right thing. Any woman with kids that would put tithing over feeding their kids properly cannot call themselves a good Mother. I feel for you- Our situation isn't as bad as yours but still difficult. There will certainly be no surprise pregnancies for us! We dont plan on having kids for another 3-4 years at least, as I want to be debt free, working, and close to having a mortgage before I even think about that. Good luck to you too!!!

Who says its ok?? It shows how much you know, because that sort of thing is definitely not normal and Im sure many of the other Brits on the board would agree with me. But someone mentioned a 14 yr old in some states can get married. And THATS ok??? 16 is the legal age of consent here, but that doesnt mean a 16 year old shacking up with a 30 year old is ok. .Probably the only thing we'll ever agree on so I thought Id better throw it in. Of course it applies to women!! Its just as sick the other way round. Sleeping with lots different people is not the same. If you sleep with hundreds, yes I agree its not right. But to use a religious excuse to make it 'ok' is what I find abhorrent. People who sleep around, cheat whatever, dont justify ot with religion. They usually know their behaviour is wrong. Polygamists try to justify it wth religion so people can't argue. Thats what I have a problem with. Exactly. Just because it is 'legal' does not mean it is right or good. There are ALWAYS grey areas.

WANDERER, I think what basically happens is all down to the individuals who run the church. So for example, what one Bishop might deem aceptable and a non-issue might have another Bishop running for the hills is horror. Ive heard some bishops who wont allow people to baptise their kids if they dont pay tithing, yet other bishops would not even think it was relevant. This can be applied to many issues, so there isn't really a cut and dried answer. Its all dependant on what local leaders deem acceptable. So that can be confusing to some members as the 'doctrine' differs from ward to ward. We had a bishop in our neighbouring ward who was so cool. He was so solid and down to earth, he recognised church 'cliques' and cultures and even did impressions of some of the more 'holy' members. He was such a laugh and a GREAT bishop. (And only 28!) He would have allowed a lot more freedom of choice in interpretation of belief than many bishops I know. He also took the p out of himself, as he had 6 kids by the age of 28. He would say, man, i know. I ONLY have six!!! Im going to burn in hell!!! Other Bishops, may take that LITERALLY. I hope that answers some of your questions. xx

My Grandmother's parents were first cousins and we are all normal :) Fiannan, I dont like your generalisations of 'european' or british culture. 'England' does not believe abortion is ok, there are laws that allow it, as like many of you americans keep saying, we have FREEDOM OF CHOICE, but there are major pro-life groups who strongly disagree also. How about if I said 'AMERICA' is ignorant to news in the rest of the world, all they eat are hamburgers, and they are all obese??? My personal opinion on this is what racheldrew said. These people are sickos. Any man who wants to marry or sleep with a young teenage girl is considered a paedophile over here. We take child abuse extremey seriously, obviously unlike some states in America. They are sick. In fact, anyone who wants lots of 'wives' full stop has a twisted mind and can only 'get away' with sleeping with lots of women at the same time by using religion as an excuse. Ugh. Makes me feel nauseous.

Why do you want green teas with no caffeine or tannin? Would you show me where it says that in the word of wisdom?? In that case eating chocolate is banned. It winds me up that people assume the word of wisdom is to do with caffeine. It has nothing about caffeine in it. In that case, drinking de-caffeinated coffee is ok yes????

bug it sounds like your Mother isputting way too much pressure on you for her own benefits! Can I ask how old you are? You should look for a partner if and when you are ready on YOUR terms not your Mothers! Who says you would have kids straight away anyway? Start thinking about what YOU want. Whoever said if you love being single its easier being married I think is spot on. I absolutely loved being single! I even turned my hubby down initially as I didnt really want a serious relationship! I was having too much fun going out with my girls, gettin attention, getting phone numbers, waiting for that phone call.......ahhh those were the days. Mind you, I started dating my husband when I was only 20, so I was too young to have people start pressurising me to find someone. If I was 25 it might have been a different story and I sympathise. One tip that always worked for me-If you are desperate and go looking for someone, it takes longer/might not happen. If you go with the flow and think whatever happens happens, you will find someone! In my last year of being single before I started going out with my husband I was literally beating them off with a stick as I wasn't atall bothered! You must give out certain vibes or something. :) I think it shows that you're happy with yourself no matter what and are not mooching around because you're single. Not attractive. Attractive is being happy and comfortable with yourself no mater what you marital status. Having said all that, I didnt know how good marriage would be until I did it-So if I was to be single noe, I think I would find it realy hard. Being lonely-Im so sed to sharing everything with my hubby. I know my Dad found it incredibly hard when he and my Mum divorced. Its not easy, I admit that.

Traveler your Dad sounds like a smart man. Skippy, how handy you're a financial advisor! I hear what you're saying. And you're absolutely right, we need to change the way we think about money. How do you go about doing that?? To change your whole way of thinking. Most of your suggestions we already do. We dont have sky or cable, we have bad credit so we cant buy a reliable car on credit, and even of we could, we wouldnt be able to afford the payments. My Dad has actually just given us one of their cars, a volvo. they are solid but it needs a new gear box and still has 93k on the clock. We live in the cheapest house ossible. Our agency are always telling us, you have such a good deal there. They're right, any other house inout area is 100-150 quid more a month. Your suggestions are good though, they basically have shown mehow we need to evaluate what we are spending. Your link didnt work though An interesting update-Hubby rings me about half an hour ago and says he's gonna be working late tonight as he's got a big job on, which will enable him to earn double what he normally brings home. so he will earn a months worth of money in 2 weeks. Now, if we had paid tithing Im sure you would all be saying, Oh look at the blessing!!! But we havent, so it goes to show you can move forward financially without paying tithing. Plus my Dad gave us a car-so I suppose things can still happen. It is exactly what skippy said-being a steward over our finances. I suppose its about controlling your spending, not letting it control you!! By the way elgama-I have always wanted to grow my own vegetables. And if I had a garden, I would!!! Perhaps in the future when we have our own home (ha, if that ever happens).

Fiona, You must have married him because you love him. If you still do then whats the problem?? You married him knowing full well he wasnt a member. You have to accept all that entails. He might never join. It shouldnt matter if yu have a loving and stable relationship. I would stand by my husband no matter what he did religiously. I didnt marry him for the church, I married him because I was madly in love with him. The church comes second to him and always will. Thats how it should be xx

I dont think Id want to know the sex MorningStar! I think its one of lifes great surprises. Just as well as our local hospital is forbidden to sex babies at scans because of our high muslim population, and girls are undesirable, and women are pressured to abort or worse. Great town I live in eh?!

Thanks some good advice. Some things we cant seem to be able to reduce. Getting rid of the car is an absolute non option elgama!! Hubby needs it for work, he travels all over the south east and London as a decorator with all his gear in the car. which is where half our money goes-in the tank!) But I suppose I take your point about reducing what you can. I try to do that already, every week, but perhaps I could try harder and really look at areas to reduce our outgoings. LOL Canuck u make me laugh. Luxuries. haha!!! Our luxuries consist of going to the town once a week to look at all the things we cant afford. LOL. u seem to have it sussed. I wish we had a few hundred a month left over at the end of each month!!! I knew everyone would say tithing which is fair enough I suppose. If we paid tithing we would either not eat, rob would not be able to get to work, so no money to pay for ANYTHING, We would probably get taken to court for non payment of things that tithing would havet payed for, or evicted or worse. I don't think even any of you have enough faith to hope money would fall out of the sky, so you can appreciate why not. Im sure people know how missing one payment of something is enough to set you back weeks and Im not prepared to put us in that situation. Frankly, I think its irresponsible. Its not something like prayer you can test at will and have nothing to lose. If we pay tithing we have a HELL of a lot to lose. So its not an option at the moment. Plus, people who are not in the church manage. So I would rather look at it from a practical point of view. Thanks for your suggestions so far!!! Keep em coming! Failing that if anyone feels particularly charitable and has a lot of spare cash....you know where to throw it hahaha just kidding. x

Our finances have taken a battering lately. It's actually started to get me down. We have a fairly reasonable income, even though I am a student as I get paid to study. The problem is, we seem to lurch from one crisis to the next. For example, our car breaking down or dying altogether is a common thing for us. By the time we have either bought a new one or forked out to have it repaired, and are financially 'straight' another crisis happens. So we are never able to put anything by for emergencies as we lurch from one financial emergency to the next. Wwe throw money at whatever is needed and then fall short elsewhere. We never seem to have any money because of this and are constantly borrowing a few quid here and there from our parents (all of whom earn less than us by the way except my Dad) We also have a lot of debt. It is not enough for us to have a payment plan (so we're told) but too much to pay off what each creditor wants. I have no idea how to get round that one. Our debt is around 10 k. Does anyone have any tips on how we can get in control of our finances? I would love to be able to not panic like the wind when something breaks down/goes wrong because we have no savings. It would be so nice to think, Oh we have some money aside, its an inconvenience but its sortable. Help!!!

I think it's so awful most people you know can't attend your wedding. I feel bad on your behalf that you miss out on a proper wedding I waited my entire life to walk down the aisle! I wouldnt give that up for anything.