Mixed member relations

[Emohawk]

Hello, i recently left the Church in July and I became a Catholic. My family are still members oviously and struggle to understand my choice. I'm sure others on here would too. So for everyone members and non-members advice.

[Lbybug]

what made you choose catholic over baptist, or jewish, or scientology, or jehova's witness, or anything else/ out of curiosity.

[georgia2]

When I changed from Baptist to LDS I had some extremely strong reasons for the decision.

What are yours?

[Dr T]

Ceeboo is on this site and he's Catholic too. I'm not LDS either. Wecome to this site :)

[Emohawk]

In reply to both questions. I think it started earlier. I did the whole well if it's not J Smith it's the other side of the coin Peter's successor. I started speaking to priests when i was 17 and almost was received into the church but stopped after pressure from my father. However i resisted going on my mission until finsihing university and spent the next three years hanging out in the Catholic chaplaincy when free.

I served a mission after years of talks with my bishops, stake presidents and other members as well as family. I know I shouldn't have gone, anyway in Montreal I struggled with gaining a testimony. I also was exposed to a lot of Catholic bashing from other missionaries in terms of the nature of the area we were serving. A lot of people were quite disrespectful of religious sites of the church now I'm not blaming them at all I mean it was mainly horseplay but it made me think. It made me curious but I worked hard and put it to the back of my mind.

I returned home troubled. I'd had depression and was tired. I served in the church event taught seminary for one year. I was still struggling. Life was put on hold. I still wanted what everybody else wanted, a family but something was missing.

I went to university to do a masters in my hometown of Manchester. I was feeling despondent and lost. I had no peace. Anyway I went to the chaplaincy of the Catholic church and asked ot speak to somebody. I spoke to a nun and it straetd from there. I began atteding mass whilst even helping missionaries (incredibly confusing but i was working on the principal you learn by doing).

I read the catechism and started praying the rosary. I even read books on the trinity and felt that I understood it as best as a human could. I also began to feel the presence in the eucharist, although I couldn't take it. I began to make friends with a girl who was catholic and I really lliked her but at the same time I stopped learning because I didn't want to join a church because of someone else. Anyway the next school year I was doing a PGCE (teacher training) and I moved out into a student house. During that time I had an epiphany I felt very low and confused almost wanting to end everything and I walked endlessly all day in Manchester in the rain, feeling quite stupid and hopeless anyway I foud myself going past the chaplaincy again and I immediatley walked inside. I talked with priest for about 2 hours and just laid everything out. It helped me.

I started going back to Catechism classes and I began to feel very strongly a need to join it. I understood the nature of saints for me it made sense. Especially Marianne devotion which was something which helped me. Anyway I was received on May 27th 2007 day of Pentecost. I was married in March 2008 and now we're expecting our first child.

Edited October 25, 2008 by Emohawk
Don't want to be offensive

[Emohawk]

The problem in my family is that my father was training to be a Catholic priest for several years and he never spoke about it. Anyway whenever I spoke to people I got the usual instructions read, ponder and pray. It ended up I couldn't speak to my mother and became estranged from my family.

I didn't invite them to the baptism and didn't tell them every time i tried to mention it was obviously too painful for them to talk about. Now we talk and they love my wife but it still feels strained.

[prisonchaplain]

Ironically, Catholicism and LDS both see room for blessing in each other's faiths. They make not recognize each others' sacraments, but nevertheless, the sense of right vs. wrong is far less than say between evangelicalism and LDS. Ultimately though, no parent wants to see their children depart from the family faith. So, if you are sure you are right, you pray, put your best face on, and live with the strain.

[YoungMormonRoyalist]

Wait there's a divide between evangelicals and Mormons?!?!?!? When did this come about?!?!??!

[prisonchaplain]

Wait there's a divide between evangelicals and Mormons?!?!?!? When did this come about?!?!??!

I think it was when a certain presidential candidate chose the evangelical over the LDS candidate, as his running mate.

[georgia2]

I thought he chose a WOMAN ! oh yeah, uh, well it must be them cause I LOVE SARAH ! And I'm LDS !

[Palerider]

welcome to the site......:)

[Guest ceeboo]

Hello, i recently left the Church in July and I became a Catholic. My family are still members oviously and struggle to understand my choice. I'm sure others on here would too. So for everyone members and non-members advice.

Hello Emohawk,

Advice ??

I will offer you my bias very opinionated 6 cents :)

A very difficult dynamic in a family when one or part decide to change faiths. ( Not an easy thing to do and can indeed be filled with pain and " walking on egg shell " feelings.

My advice for you, since you asked :).

First, to be clear with you, I am Cathoilic and like most have my own bias :)

Try and focus on the " common ground " that exists between you and your LDS family members. We are ALL followere of Jesus Christ ( THAT IS NO SMALL THING ) as followers we are taught to love, help, and treat our fellow human as Christ did ( this certainly includes the love and respect for your parents ).:)

I fully realize the differences that exist between Catholic and LDS but WOULD STRONGLY SUGGEST you leave those to the Lord and simply LOVE, RESPECT, and HONOR your LDS family members.

Hope that helps a little :)

God bless and welcome home :):):)

Carl

[countrygirl66]

hi emohawk

I am LDS and beleive it with all my heart. I also have family members from different faiths and some who practice no faith at all. I love them all. I would try to remember that you still have core beleifs in common. For me they are things like we all want good marriages, we all want to raise our kids well and are doing our best, we all beleive in god and that he loves all of our children. I would also say that most faiths help people strive to be better people than they would without faith. Some of my family used to be worried that I was going to try to convert them to my faith. I have told them that I beleive it with all my heart and know it is right. I have also told them that I can only answer their questions and share my testimony but conversion would be between them and the lord. It has helped for them to know I love them even if we live somewhat differently. Congratulations on finding what you feel is right.

[mbcecil89]

My best friend very recently announced that she finally has realized the lds faith is a load of garbage and she hopes that won't affect our friendship. I'm distraught. How do I accept her and my own faith. I'm not a kid...but this has never happened to me before!

[countrygirl66]

One of my very best friends really struggles between faith and no faith. I lover her and tell her often. Wether she decides to come back to the lds church or not I will always love her as my friend. I have found that even though she has wide boundries she respects mine. So we do things like go get soup for lunch. Make a fudge run on a stressful day. When she wants to go out for a night on the town with her girlfriends I am not a part of that. I would say just be her friend and love her for the reasons she has always been your friend.

[mbcecil89]

Thanks for the advice. I've been questioning just who the heck I am friends with. I've always identified so strongly with my faith and my friends. and she has been part of that network for more than 8 years

[melissar]

My best friend is of a different faith. We respect each others differences and have found that we have more in common than different.

[Hemidakota]

Hello, i recently left the Church in July and I became a Catholic. My family are still members oviously and struggle to understand my choice. I'm sure others on here would too. So for everyone members and non-members advice.

Be patient and set the example. It will take some time before they realize your choice was right.

[Starfish]

IMO, (I know, who cares what I think?) since you joined the Catholic Church, then really be Catholic! I respect most religions and have a GREAT appreciation for the good they bring into this world. It bothers me to see people profess a particular faith, but then not live it.

Attend mass each week and do all that your religion embraces. Live it to the fullest. Raise your children to love God, and to stay close to His guidance.

Best wishes.

P.S. If my son/daughter/sibling left the LDS faith and joined another, my heart would be broken. BUT I would never reject them and would do all I could to respect their choice. I've seen negative family reactions when people become LDS and have learned it does no good.

Edited October 30, 2008 by Starfish

[Hemidakota]

For others, going to any church and serving GOD is better than none at all.

[Emohawk]

I don't want to give the impression that i don't speak at all to my family outside of my faith but the strain is there. They want to tell me about Sunday school lessons and I want to tell them about what we're plannig at school for feast days. It's all very much a mixed bag.

[BenRaines]

Amen, I have four children raised LDS. Three that attend church regularly and hold temple recommends. One has decided that attending church is not for her. Do I love her less? Heck no. Is she invited to all family outings? Yes. She has two of our three grandchildren. Are they treated differently? No.

There is only one life I can do anything about and that is mine. My parents can't do mine and I can't do my childrens.

Ben Raines

[ADoyle90815]

My best friend very recently announced that she finally has realized the lds faith is a load of garbage and she hopes that won't affect our friendship. I'm distraught. How do I accept her and my own faith. I'm not a kid...but this has never happened to me before!

The thing to do would be to show her unconditional love as Christ would do.

[jolee65]

Mormons are not the only ones going to heaven and we'll all be learing the same thing during the second coming so whats it matter really. Your Catholic thats ok. just let your family see Catholics live a christian life too.

Oh im LDS, just in case anyone was wondering. :)

[Hemidakota]

I truly hope not. We are all brothers and sisters and are from the same Creator, who image we were formed after. [Christains out there] However, I would add, Heaven as pointed out by Saul [Paul], as he had that opportunity to gaze in to that mysterious heaven and discovered something that was beautiful and yet, a cursing to humanity. We are not just placed in one heaven but divided on our mortality journey of life. There is no escaping that there is but one gospel, one church, and one Christ. If not, why would He divide Himself and cause chaos situation? He simply didn't...this is where we need to be reminded that prayer is the way to enlightenment in finding that answer.

I do not believe many in the church will be quickly resurrected and will have to wait until correction is made to one's character in bringing themselves to the celestial conformity. However, I do believe those who are called by the Savior in this world, as friends and considered the Church of the First Born, will quickly resurrected and moving on to other taskings. Not all members in the LDS church are called to this for one reason or another spoken in the D&C.

Edited December 12, 2008 by Hemidakota