Elgama Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 HOW DO I STOP MY SON MAKING MESS OF HOUSE WHEN I AM CLEANING UP? -Charley Quote
Wingnut Posted January 12, 2009 Author Report Posted January 12, 2009 HOW DO I STOP MY SON MAKING MESS OF HOUSE WHEN I AM CLEANING UP? -CharleyTie him to a tree outside. Quote
FunkyTown Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 HOW DO I STOP MY SON MAKING MESS OF HOUSE WHEN I AM CLEANING UP? -CharleyI would recommend engaging your son in some activity that all boys like. It's never too early to enroll your son in classes like Smoov B's "The Wimmens: Why they be lovin' pimpin'" and "Pimpin' Ain't Easy - Smoov B's ABC guide to pimpin'" or even, "Pimpitude: How to look cute for when your uncle takes you to the park to pick up ladies." Quote
Misshalfway Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 The ladies, they are like the desert flower that blooms on the cactus after the spring rains. They are bright and decorate the land, but they are quick to wilt. Your problem, is that you have too much of the lady genes and not enough of the Funkytown man-genes. I would recommend Smoov B's "Guide to the Male Mind". This tome of wisdom and inspiration should show you the path that you require.I'm like a desert what????? Quote
FunkyTown Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 I'm like a desert what?????Baby, don't be hatin'. Quote
Misshalfway Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 (edited) Baby, don't be hatin'.(Quote from Three Amigos)Jefe: Forgive me, El Guapo. I know that I, Jefe, do not have your superior intellect and education. But could it be that once again, you are angry at something else, and are looking to take it out on me? Edited January 12, 2009 by Misshalfway Quote
applepansy Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 Dear FT and Wingnut, Is there a cure "mother deafness" or "wife deafness?" Quote
lilered Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 Dear Ft. and Wingut. I have the hots for Ms 1/2, do you think she is too old for me? Quote
Wingnut Posted January 12, 2009 Author Report Posted January 12, 2009 Dear FT and Wingnut,Is there a cure "mother deafness" or "wife deafness?"I'm sorry, could you repeat the question?Dear Ft. and Wingut.I have the hots for Ms 1/2, do you think she is too old for me?Regardless of your age, you may find that MOE will put up a fight for Miss 1/2 before you can have her. Quote
lilered Posted January 12, 2009 Report Posted January 12, 2009 I'm sorry, could you repeat the question?Regardless of your age, you may find that MOE will put up a fight for Miss 1/2 before you can have her.How good is MOE at winning food fights, cuz I practice constantly? Quote
Misshalfway Posted January 13, 2009 Report Posted January 13, 2009 Dear Ft. and Wingut.I have the hots for Ms 1/2, do you think she is too old for me?Lilered my love....I never knew! Where for art thou , lil Romeo? What is that you say? French?? Whilst thou pull thy toe out of thy mouth so I hear your words of love! Or is that just baby talk? Quote
Wingnut Posted January 13, 2009 Author Report Posted January 13, 2009 How good is MOE at winning food fights, cuz I practice constantly?I'm pretty sure he has a Mini MOE...he could do some intense training if you wanted to schedule a fight. Quote
Misshalfway Posted January 13, 2009 Report Posted January 13, 2009 (edited) Hmmm..... a man who mows his lawn daringly without his shirt on and a man in a stinky diaper......how will I ever choose? ( perhaps this is the next question for the all wise barnum and bailey team of Wing and Funk.) Edited January 13, 2009 by Misshalfway Quote
lilered Posted January 13, 2009 Report Posted January 13, 2009 Dear Wing and Funk: I think I have a chance with Miss 1/2, do you think if I change my diaper, take out the curlers, and get a binky she will go out on a date to Chucky Cheese? Quote
Wingnut Posted January 13, 2009 Author Report Posted January 13, 2009 Lilered...it could be risky taking her to Chuck E Cheese, as she is probably too tall for some of the attractions, and she could probably use YOU to whack the mole with. Quote
lilered Posted January 13, 2009 Report Posted January 13, 2009 Hmmm..... a man who mows his lawn daringly without his shirt on and a man in a stinky diaper......how will I ever choose?( perhaps this is the next question for the all wise barnum and bailey team of Wing and Funk.)Dear Miss 1/2 - This could be a WIN-WIN - Two dirty old men. One 1/2 naked, the other stinky:D Quote
evsis10 Posted January 15, 2009 Report Posted January 15, 2009 Ok, what does it mean when a guy constantly argues w/you, but at the same time is really nice? Quote
Wingnut Posted January 15, 2009 Author Report Posted January 15, 2009 Ok, what does it mean when a guy constantly argues w/you, but at the same time is really nice?I'll leave this one to Funky, but I'm guessing it'll have something to do with flowers, desert, and cacti. Quote
Misshalfway Posted January 15, 2009 Report Posted January 15, 2009 Ok, what does it mean when a guy constantly argues w/you, but at the same time is really nice?I am voting for male patterned PMS. Quote
Gwen Posted January 15, 2009 Report Posted January 15, 2009 Ok, what does it mean when a guy constantly argues w/you, but at the same time is really nice?you're married lol Quote
lilered Posted January 16, 2009 Report Posted January 16, 2009 Whats patterned PMS? Is it where the male follows the same pattern as his wife? Quote
Elphaba Posted January 17, 2009 Report Posted January 17, 2009 Dear Wing and Funk, I am beside myself with despair. For months now I have had a huge crush on lilered, but he doesn't even notice me. Now he's fighting MOE for Miss Half. While I understand the attraction, imagine how I feel knowing he wouldn't stub his big toe for me, as he doesn't even notice me. There was a time when I thought lilered was at least looking my way. He even wrote me a birthday poem that I read over and over, doing my happy dance with each stanza. I let myself be convinced he had a crush on me as well. Then that seem too good to be true, so I settled for thinking he did notice me! But then time passed, and he fell head over heels for that beautiful vamp, Miss Half, and, well, lilered doesn't notice me anymore. How do I get lilered to notice me? Elphaba Quote
Wingnut Posted January 17, 2009 Author Report Posted January 17, 2009 Elphie, Babies like sparkly shiny things...maybe he would notice you if you put your sparkly green eye back up. Quote
pam Posted January 18, 2009 Report Posted January 18, 2009 Elphie I can understand your attraction to lilered. You enjoy those that are intelligent. For a baby he's VERY intelligent. Imagine what he will be like when he grows up.!!! Oh shoot...this is dear FunkyTown and Wingnut. My bad. Quote
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