Inzaghi1922 Posted July 27, 2011 Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 Okay, ive been a member for a little over a year. around 3-4 months into the church, my participation in the church was starting to get overwhelming(already went to the temple once, had a patriarchal blessing, and a bunch of other things.) So i really did not live a 'righteous' life, and starting around February or March, I just stopped going to church all together. Now recently, i went to Youth Conference for our area, and long story short, or new branch president said some things that made me check my life. But, while i was inactive. I did not obey the law of chastity or the words of wisdom. I smoke(both tobacco and marijuana,) drunk alcohol, and had tea and coffee. I also watched pornography and, this is the worst part, has sexual relations with a couple of girls. I want to tell my bishop, yet i really dont want my mother or really anyone know about me breaking the law of chastity. My mother already knew i broke the words of wisdom because she saw me smoke and drink tea plenty of times, but does not know about me breaking the law of chastity. I was wondering, is it required of the bishop to tell my mother about me breaking the law of chastity? i remember at youth conference, they said it was entirely up to us and the bishop had to keep it a secret if we did not want our parents to know(YC was big on morality this year. go figure,) but i have also heard it is required. help? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inzaghi1922 Posted July 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 Also(sorry i forgot to mention this,) i am 17 and i want to be fully repented so i can go on my mission ASAP. so i want to do this early as possible, but i dont want my mother to know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted July 27, 2011 Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 Talk to your bishop. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inzaghi1922 Posted July 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 not really what i was asking. i was asking whether or not the bishop is required to tell my mother about me breaking the law of chastity. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie Posted July 27, 2011 Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 And the only one who can tell you that is your bishop. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mimi Posted July 27, 2011 Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 going to the bishop is a confidential thing. He is sworn to secrecy about the things you confess to him. your parents do not have to know. if you wanted the bishop to help you in telling them these things i'm sure he would, but if you don't want him to blab, he won't. go talk to your bishop. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Inzaghi1922 Posted July 27, 2011 Author Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 Alright thanks, i was planning on telling him this sunday, but i was just wondering if i should be prepared to have my rights taken away for a while or not. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SQUARE Posted July 27, 2011 Report Share Posted July 27, 2011 Talk with your bishop. Do to your actions you might not be able to go on a mission. I hope you can work things out for the best. Stay strong no matter what happens. Good luck, and ctr. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bytebear Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 I would be very surprised if you were excommunicated. you will likely be disfellowshipped which means you cannot hold official positions or participate in public (like giving a talk, or a prayer in Sacrament meeting). You also should not take the sacrament until you are ready for repentance. You will need to be squeaky clean from now on if you want to serve a mission, and even then your immorality may be an issue. The church has really been more strict on the morality of missionaries, so make sure you are really preparing yourself for your mission (and your life!) The bishop will help you, and your attitude and willingness to work with the bishop to get you back on the right track will go a long way. Hopefully you and he can build a relationship where he is more of a guide to happiness than a punisher. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kolob Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Yeah go repent, but only if your sure your ready to do so. Your bishop will tell no one. There will be guidlines that your bishop follows in order to carry out the repentance process completely. May take days, even months. But I don't think you'll be severely punished. Because your not an elder yet therefore the oath and covenant of the priesthood isn't over you yet. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slamjet Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Yeah go repent, but only if your sure your ready to do so.Horrible advice.But I don't think you'll be severely punished. Because your not an elder yet therefore the oath and covenant of the priesthood isn't over you yet.How do you know? We do not know the whole story so to say this is misguided. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kolob Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 (edited) He said he's 17. That's how I know he's not an elder yet. By severely punished I mean excomunicated I thought were here to help not contend with one another. Remember the spirit of contention is of the devil. I don't want to argue. I don't know why you say that is horrible advice? If your not ready and you go repent, then a week later fall back into sin it's gonna become harder to stop each time. Being ready I mean know for sure that your ready and have left the sins in the past. Edited July 28, 2011 by Kolob Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slamjet Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Because confession is the beginning of repentance, it is not the repentance process itself. A person may not be ready to start the change, but knowing it's wrong and talking to an ecclesiastical leader about it will help start the process. To say don't bother until you are ready is a disservice. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kolob Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Read my other post. I really feel a bad spirit coming off of your posts. I don't know what's wrong in your life. But I don't feel the spirit is the one inspiring you to be argumentative and put other peoples advice down. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ztodd Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 I would recommend a person should stop sinning right away once they know it's wrong, no matter whether they "feel ready" or not. If you keep sinning, it gets harder to repent, and you just hurt yourself and the Savior more and more. Not sure what is meant by "when you feel ready", but it's not gonna get any easier, so you'll never really feel "ready" in that sense. You need to be ready right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JaneDoe Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Talk with your Bishop. He will decide what will happen. Everything that you say will be confidential. He may advise you to tell your mother, but you don't have to. My advice to you is to pray for strength to over come these temptations. Be prayful always. :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ztodd Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Read my other post.I really feel a bad spirit coming off of your posts. I don't know what's wrong in your life.But I don't feel the spirit is the one inspiring you to be argumentative and put other peoples advice down. Try not to take disagreement too personally Kolob. There will be a lot of disagreement on these forums. We don't mean it to be a personal attack. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kolob Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Yeah I agree I wasn't saying he shouldn't stop sinning until he's ready. I said he sould repent only when he feels truly ready. What do I mean by this. I personally don't think you should go repent while still sinning. I think the repentance bears more fruit when the person goes already having abandoned sin. That's just my personal opinion. Ask your bishop alll this. Nobody here can tell you what the lords will is for you other then those called to do so. Good luck! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kolob Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Try not to take disagreement too personally Kolob. There will be a lot of disagreement on these forums. We don't mean it to be a personal attack.Oh hmmSorry, Maybe I shouldn't post here. I just don't like feeling bad vibes, or too much contention when the subject at matter is helping one another and repentance.I had the wrong idea about these forums. I know everyone has different ways of thinking, i just thought discussions here would be with a good spirit, not so much the way it is. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
slamjet Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 You were advising. And I was pointing out your advice is lacking. It shows your lack of experience. So please don't go around throwing out that, in your spiritual opinion, I'm having a bad life because of my disagreement with you. It only serves to show you in the light of self-righteousness, and that's not very becoming. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Time out guys. Kolob - you said "Yeah go repent, but only if your sure your ready to do so." Sounded kinda casual. (That's the problem with text-based internet messaging forums - it's possible to read into things that weren't intended.) Slamjet - you are correct, although quite blunt in your replies. Can we agree to agree agreeably? :) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skippy740 Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Now, for some advice for the OP - Not every missionary has a "squeaky-clean" past - except through repentance.The sooner you begin the process of repentance - including confession regardless of the consequences, is when your heart is changing towards the things of God. If you're still "afraid of getting caught" (and that is your main motivation), then your heart is not yet ready for repentance.To begin changing your heart, it can begin with prayer, scripture study, attending your church meetings and/or a meeting with your priesthood leaders.The true heart of repentance won't really care about the consequences because living in sin or unconfessed sins is a terrible consequence in and of itself.Others have mentioned how the church discipline system works. Please don't stress on that. "Do what is right let the consequence follow."The sooner you do this, the better you'll feel.And no. Mom doesn't need to find out, nor would she be told. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blocky Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Your bishop will not tell your mother about anything. Some of the replies on here make it sound kind of scary. Like, your bishop PROBABLY won't be too harsh... but he might. Totally not how it is. I've been there and done that, the feeling of having repented feels so good. Such a relief. Each situation is unique, but that's the beauty of it all. If not being able to take the sacrament for a while is what will help you, that's what will happen. Remember that satan doesn't want you talking to the bishop and resolving this. He wants you afraid and for you to keep putting it off, so that you'll just bury it down and not repent. Don't let him win. You sinned. We all do. You want to repent. Awesome. Yes, talking to your bishop is a vital step, go for it. Don't let fear get in the way, because it's really not that complicated. Awesome about wanting to go on a mission. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b0dhi Posted July 28, 2011 Report Share Posted July 28, 2011 Your bishop will not tell your mother, but I have heard of times when teenagers were required to confess to the parents themselves. I doubt that will be the case though since there really can't be any good that would come from that. Your branch president isn't dumb. What good could telling a worrying mother about a wayward son's repented mistakes possibly do? Good luck on your mish. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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