Question about temple sealing and temple divorce.

[Seminarysnoozer]

This may have been discussed previously, sorry to repeat it if that is the case, couldn't find it. My friend's husband was previously married in the temple. There were no kids involved in that marriage, there was a civil divorce but not "temple divorce" (not sure what that is exactly). My friend and her husband are happily married in the temple, they have 3 kids sealed to them, and no other kids involved. She tells me that her husbands records say "previously sealed" and she is wondering why that can't be removed. She is worried in the next life this previous wife will be connected to her husband and that he might even be able to choose her over my friend as a "first wife" even though they were only married for a few months.

The questions are, could that "previously sealed" designation be removed from the records without involving the consent or involvement of the "first wife"? What has to be done?

And, does that mean he will have an opportunity in the next life, if they repent of whatever took them apart to get back together despite the new temple marriage sealing and children?

I had to answer her that I didn't know.

[Gwen]

first, there is no "temple divorce"

You have clearence and cancelation.

They got a clearence for the second sealing.

The church records are nothing more than a way of tracking things on this earth. The fact that it says previously sealed means nothing more than to state that fact.

The sealing isn't a done deal. You have to keep your end of the bargan for the blessings. The first marriage did not keep their end of the deal (divorce kinda kills that) and thus there is no promise... ie no claim on that sealing in the next life.

The only way they could have claim on each other later is if.... the second wife dies, they remarry and live the sealing covenant until death..... if that were to happen I'm not sure who would be "the first wife" but I figure the odds are so slim it's not worth the mental energy to ponder it.

[Seminarysnoozer]

first, there is no "temple divorce"

You have clearence and cancelation.

They got a clearence for the second sealing.

The church records are nothing more than a way of tracking things on this earth. The fact that it says previously sealed means nothing more than to state that fact.

The sealing isn't a done deal. You have to keep your end of the bargan for the blessings. The first marriage did not keep their end of the deal (divorce kinda kills that) and thus there is no promise... ie no claim on that sealing in the next life.

The only way they could have claim on each other later is if.... the second wife dies, they remarry and live the sealing covenant until death..... if that were to happen I'm not sure who would be "the first wife" but I figure the odds are so slim it's not worth the mental energy to ponder it.

Thanks! I think I see it that way too. I guess my friend is confused about why they would still keep it on the records then if there is no chance of it being a celestial marriage. I think it might be for the possibility of the first wife, if she never remarries in the temple then she still has received those covenants and promises even if it is not to that person? Why not have that designation just on her records and not on his. He is now married in the temple, so that designation serves no purpose for him, only potentially affects the first wife.

If she does happen to remarry, though, I wonder if they would remove the "previously sealed" designation on his records?

[Backroads]

I suppose it can be pushed through. My husband's first wife demanded a sealing cancellation as well as a plain ol' divorce. She was discouraged against it, but in the end did get her way.

As for getting a sealing cancellation... I understood that things can still happen even if ex-spouse refuses to comply, but I think you have to have a pretty darn good reason.

As has been said... your friend shouldn't worry too much. If in the eternities all is forgiven and he does respect that sealing... maybe your friend and the ex-wife will be able to embrace each other as well.

And if ex-wife is still young... chances are someday she will meet someone with whom she wants to be sealed to and a sealing cancellation will happen anyway.

[garryw]

your friend needs to modify her clothing and hairstyle. she is now a polygamist 2nd wife.

(kidding, about the hair anyway)

[Gwen]

garryw, innacurate and not amusing.

[slamjet]

So, if I totally lose my mind and decide to remarry, and I get a clearance, does that mean I'm still sealed to my first spouse, whom I divorced and now sealed to my new spouse? I'm sealed to two at one time?

[Gwen]

yes and no. the ordinance has happened and depending on you or the ex wife's worthiness you are entitled to the individual blessings of the covenant (any children are entitled to the blessings of having been sealed). However, You did not keep the covenant to eachother, the blessing of which being an eternal marriage, so you have no promise on that. the paperwork is there but it means about as much as someone that gets baptized for the wrong reasons and then goes inactive and never comes back. Yes they were baptized but they have no promise to anything.

Which is different than a man that remarries after the death of his wife. If their marriage was worthy of the eternal blessings of the covenant at her death and he remains faithful to his covenants until death then he "has claim" to both women... I'm assuming they also both want claim on him. lol

You have no claim upon blessings of a covenant you didn't keep.

D&C 82:10

I, the Lord, am abound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no bpromise.

[Guest]

I don't believe that if/when we get to the Celestial kingdom that we'll have to be bound to anyone we don't want to be bound to. I don't have anything to back that up, but I've always felt that way (and as a side note, it's one thing that motivates me to continue to be the kind of wife that my husband will want forever).

[slamjet]

My ex is active and holds a recommend. I'm the louse, but I become active and once again hold a recommend. Does that mean my sealing to her is no more even though I receive my blessing back?

[pam]

My understanding is that all the blessings of the sealing are once again restored.

[slamjet]

Well, this is quite interesting.

[pam]

But then again I could be wrong. What do I know? :) That's just the way I've always understood it.

[slamjet]

But then again I could be wrong. What do I know? :) That's just the way I've always understood it.

Wana get remarried and test it? Oh wait, no recommend. Forget it.

[Backroads]

Proposal! Proposal!

[slamjet]

Proposal! Proposal!

NO! NO!

I see I'm going to have to delete my post

[jayanna]

That is my understanding as well, Pam, I don't think an earthly divorce can have an effect on an eternal sealing...bound one earth, in heaven and all that...I'm pretty sure it would take a cancellation for the first wife to not be sealed anymore. In, which case, she would probably be getting sealed to someone else.

She does not lose the blessings from being sealed even though her husband has remarried another.

[texas1992]

This is a question that I have had. I can't imagine that I would be required to be with my ex wife unless I am sentenced to HELL. How could a loving Heavenly Father put two people together that do not love each other. My girlfriend tells me that I will have a chance to choose if all of us make it to the celestial kingdom. I guess I will just have to wait and see.

[MarginOfError]

My ex is active and holds a recommend. I'm the louse, but I become active and once again hold a recommend. Does that mean my sealing to her is no more even though I receive my blessing back?

My understanding is that all the blessings of the sealing are once again restored.

When your blessings are restored, your sealing is also restored. This puts you under the covenants you made to the Lord at the time of your sealing, and provides the blessings of that sealing to you. But you are not expected to keep the part of the sealing covenant pertaining to your ex-wife.

Essentially, the sealing remains in place for the benefit of the individuals at that point, not for the benefit of the spousal pair. The sealing, when under the ideal circumstances, offers a lot of benefits to the couple, to the family, and to the individuals. It's a covenant with quite a few aspects. One of the struggles we seem to have in our society is getting people not to view sealing as having a one-to-one relationship with marriage--it doesn't.

We also need to kick the idea that sealing is just like marriage, but eternal. That is only accurate in a one-dimensional analysis.

The sealing covenant, for spouses, can include the marriage, but in it's fullness, it is a covenant that guides the interactions of an individual with God, his or her spouse, children, and individual living. If a temporal divorce were to follow a sealing, the interactions between the individual and God, possibly children, and individual living are still fully in effect.

[pam]

Wana get remarried and test it? Oh wait, no recommend. Forget it.

Remarried? Don't you have to have been previously married to get remarried? I know people think I'm getting old and losing it..but I don't ever remember being married to you.

[Gwen]

Part of the sealing covenant to the spouse is to live as a spouse. Being legally married (as is required before the sealing can take place), sharing a life, kids, house, etc. You build a relationship that is strong enough and worthy of eternity. You can't do that divorced. If you are divorced you can not have the promise of an eternal marriage.

Now if you both become worthy again and then remarry each other (not someone else) then you can reclaim those blessings.

[Guest gopecon]

The Celestial Kingdom is going to be a wonderful place that surpasses all understanding to us mortals. I don't think that anyone is going to be eternally stuck in a relationship that did not work on Earth. If we do not keep the covenants made at the time of sealing, I don't see how we will be with that person in the next life. The sealing may not be formally voided in this life, but I really don't see too many of those situations being retried in the next life.

[Seminarysnoozer]

That is my understanding as well, Pam, I don't think an earthly divorce can have an effect on an eternal sealing...bound one earth, in heaven and all that...I'm pretty sure it would take a cancellation for the first wife to not be sealed anymore. In, which case, she would probably be getting sealed to someone else.

She does not lose the blessings from being sealed even though her husband has remarried another.

I am still not sure why that has to be on his record though. I can understand it on the ex's record of being previously sealed. But why on his record if he is sealed to another after that one?

[Gwen]

I am still not sure why that has to be on his record though. I can understand it on the ex's record of being previously sealed. But why on his record if he is sealed to another after that one?

I can't say why it should read that on the records but as I ponder it I'd say something to consider.....

Having been previously sealed speaks as a witness of who he is. He made a covenant and for whatever reason did not live up to that covenant. That's a big deal. He will have to answer for that one day. He may be innocent of wrong doing and it may have no impact on his final judgment or he may have properly repented and changed his ways...... but it will be brought up.

If he is ever considered for a significant calling in the church they need to know what his history is and discuss that as part of the decision. Keeping that note on the records is the easiest way to keep track of those things.

[Seminarysnoozer]

I can't say why it should read that on the records but as I ponder it I'd say something to consider.....

Having been previously sealed speaks as a witness of who he is. He made a covenant and for whatever reason did not live up to that covenant. That's a big deal. He will have to answer for that one day. He may be innocent of wrong doing and it may have no impact on his final judgment or he may have properly repented and changed his ways...... but it will be brought up.

If he is ever considered for a significant calling in the church they need to know what his history is and discuss that as part of the decision. Keeping that note on the records is the easiest way to keep track of those things.

So, it is kind of like an unpardonable sin, but maybe he didn't commit any sin at all?

If he was worthy enough to have another sealing, what are they keeping track of? I don't understand the significance of that.

My real concern though is for my friend. She is worried that the real reason it is kept on the records is that somehow this other woman will jump into the scene in the next life and take first place as she was the first. That seems a little unfair to her if she is the one that helped him live a celestial marriage, if that is the case. She does all the work, so to speak but in the end doesn't get him?

I have comforted her with similar thoughts to those posted here but still can't comfort her to the idea that there is a need to keep that on the record. I am sure it wouldn't be comforting to tell her that the reason is so that the leadership can keep track of his past mistakes that have now been cleared up, but not really, they stay in the record.