Coming back to the church after a 26 year absence ADVICE PLEASE

[paw722]

I really need some advice. I left the church at 16. at 19 I was married in the Lutheran church. At 20 when I had my son I felt pressure from my husbands family to baptize my son and become a member. I did. For years and years I have had a tug a war with my family and his and have not known what to do. I attended the Lutheran church regularly until my youngest of 3 was about 10 then I went on occasion and then not at all. During this time I said many many prayers and recently have been praying hard. 2 years ago I got a new job with 2 LDS women and they have let me share and vent my feelings and invited me to attend church with them. I have gone on occasion with them and my brother. After continuing to pray about 2 months ago I got a call from the 1st councler of my ward asking me to accept the calling of family history consultant. I prayed about it and felt a very strong urge to accept. BUT now after accepting that calling and being set apart I have overwhelming guilt that I need to confess my baptisim into the Lutheran church. I'm scared for not telling them before I accepted the calling. I felt the calling was Gods way of telling me that I needed to be back at the LDS church after 26 years. PLEASE some one tell me was it wrong of me to accept that calling? My heart has always been LDS. I know I need to talk to the Bishop because I have prayed and I have that feeling that I can not ignore. Advice PLEASE

[estradling75]

Release the guilt...

Barring you getting excommunicated you still are a member of the LDS church (assuming you were baptized into the church at 8 or so) Your baptism into the Lutheran church did not change this, although clearly you were not active with the LDS at the time.

All the blessing of the church including those from calling are yours to reclaim if you wish (with the guidance from your bishop) From the LDS church's standpoint your coming back and taking a calling are all positive things.

[paw722]

I didn't get excummunicated because I din't tell anyone that I baptised Lutheran. Not even my family. I was baptised at 8. Will they excummunicate me for this? They still have my records

[estradling75]

Paw722... See yourself as the lost sheep or the prodigal son from the parables.. they didn't get chastised when they where found or they returned, there was celebration and joy instead.

Go talk to your bishop, unburden your soul. For everyone here is just an anonymous name on the internet, but your bishop is there to help you make right what ever it is that might be needed to be made right. (Although I don't really see anything in what you posted that is excommunication worthy)

[paw722]

Thank you so much estradling75. I have been torn up inside with worry. My mother in law is starting to say things and my husband asked Why I was going to "that church" and when I told him its because It is the church I was raised in and where I belong he was then fine with it. But my mother in law now has the pastor of the lutheran church calling and now I don't feel the tug a war like I did before but I am irratated that he is calling me after so many years. Thanks for letting me vent and answering my questions. I feel much better about talking with the Bishop.

[classylady]

Welcome back, Paw722. As you come back to church, please remember that Satan does not want you to do this. There may be obstacles thrown in your path, or disappointments. Just know that your Heavenly Father is pleased with your choice. I'm rooting for you. Sending hugs and prayers your way.

[paw722]

Thank you I need a lot of prayers and hugs. My mother died 2 years ago and I am sure she is up there having a hand in all of this. She was really into genealogy and I got that calling. I really appreciate all of the support it has been a rough 26 years. Thank you Classylady.

[EarlJibbs]

Welcome Back!

If you were not temple endowed when you were baptised Lutheran there may not be a need to any action other than talking to your Bishop. But regardless of any action that needs to be taken, you will be loved by your Bishop and members. I dont think it should be fear that you have, but joy. It much doesnt matter what direction your Bishop takes as long as you are determined to continue on the path you have chosen now. I think everything will be okay. We all have reckoning to do, but that is why Christ died for my sins, and yours.

[paw722]

I left at 16 so no temple endowment.

[Backroads]

Welcome back! My this journey go well for you.

[applepansy]

Welcome back. I was recently called as the family history consultant too. I hope you'll enjoy the calling as much as I am.

I agree with everything Estradling and and classylady said so I won't repeat it. Through prayer you can find peace in your decision.

[Julianna]

I wouldn't stress about it. I'm sure your membership is still valid, regardless of the long years of absence. That said, I could be wrong, but there are a very few callings in the church one can be asked to do even if they're not members (or are members who aren't very active or are struggling with issues). I'm fairly certain yours is one of them, along with things like scout leaders. No one is perfect. We're all at different points in our progression, and everyone has to start somewhere. If you feel good about this calling, you can act in it guilt free (it's one where your activity level really doesn't impact how well you can do your calling) and know that you are serving others, especially ones who may have been inactive for far longer than you (namely the dead who have been waiting for their chance).

As for your in-laws, try to treat them with love and understand that the desire to check on you isn't motivated by hate. Many churches view ours as something to be feared, and the average person who isn't a member generally doesn't know enough about it to dismiss those irrational fears. Thank her for her concern and love, and try to maintain good relations with them.

Welcome back! I recently had a friend I met while deployed in Iraq decide to return to church after more than a decade of inactivity. The struggles are many, but the joy in the gospel is worth it.

[paw722]

Thank You Julianna. I had been praying for the lord to direct me in which way I should go and that is when I recieved the call to be a family history consultant. The Lord knows that I need to be hit with a brick to get the clues that he sends me so I took this as his way of telling me that coming back to the church is what I needed to do. I just worry that my baptism in the Lutheran churched wiped my baptisim with the LDS church away???? I have been reading the Book Of Mormon daily and have felt such a comforted feeling. I know this is the right choice but still I worry. Would I need to be baptised again to really be a member?

[EarlJibbs]

I really do not think that you would need to be baptised again. But as was suggested before, if this is weighing on you, it is sound advise to talk to your Bishop about it so that you can feel 100% sure that you have resolved everything from being way. Your story is an inspiration to us all. Thanks for sharing it with us.

[Guest]

Thank You Julianna. I had been praying for the lord to direct me in which way I should go and that is when I recieved the call to be a family history consultant. The Lord knows that I need to be hit with a brick to get the clues that he sends me so I took this as his way of telling me that coming back to the church is what I needed to do. I just worry that my baptism in the Lutheran churched wiped my baptisim with the LDS church away???? I have been reading the Book Of Mormon daily and have felt such a comforted feeling. I know this is the right choice but still I worry. Would I need to be baptised again to really be a member?

You won't have to get rebaptized if you didn't ask the Church to remove your name from Church membership and you haven't been excommunicated.

Usually, you get ex-communicated if you get baptized a Lutheran, but since that didn't happen, you're not going to be ex-communicated now because, as I understand it, you're planning on going through the repentance process. But, only your bishop has the final say on this matter. I'm fairly certain though, that part of your repentance process will be to formally denounce your Lutheran membership.

In any case, whether you need to get re-baptized or not is small potatoes. If the bishop tells you you need to get it done, then it's really a simple matter of finding an Aaronic priest, 2 witnesses, and enough water to get dunked in.

[paw722]

I never had my named removed from the church membership. I never told anyone that I was baptised Lutheran except my husbands family knew and knows but no one else. It was something I guess I was ashamed to tell my family. So I might have been excommunicated had I told anyone. If I do have to get rebaptised I'm sure my brother would be honored to do it. Thank you all so much for all of the advice it really helps me. I guess my next step is talking with the Bishop. That is gonna be a hard call to make please say a prayer for me. Thanks.

[mrmarklin]

Remember that baptism into any other church does not count to the Lord!!!

Technically, you apostatized, but I doubt that you will be excommunicated.

Edited May 25, 2012 by mrmarklin

[paw722]

mrmarklin,

Thats what scares me. Just when I found my way back I am scared they will excommunicate me. I am worried sick and it scares to me talk to the Bishop. Thanks for your comments.

[estradling75]

paw722,

Lets see if I can help set your mind at ease about being excommunicated.. While we can't speak for 100 percent certainty what your bishop will do, because it is not our calling. The general tone and thought of everyone that as posted here so far is that from what you have said, its seems very unlikely that you will be. We are simply forced to hedge our answers because it is not our place to give it.

Ponder this though... One of the purposes of excommunication is to see if the person has really had a change of heart and desires to change to do what is necessary to come back. You already have that, your already showing that to the bishop. Seems unlikely that he would do anything more then to encourage you to continue.

Now lets take your worse case, lets say he does excommunicate you... That doesn't mean you can't come back, excommunication never means that. That just means you've got a bit farther to go then anyone here expected from what we have been told.

[olytitan]

It was a long time ago and you felt the urge to go to church again. I think it is best that you tell them what happened and explain just like you did here. Worst that could happen is excommunication, but that is usually for really bad behavior and/or unrepentant feeling people. No matter what happens, if you know the LDS church is where you want to be...it will all work out. Sometimes we have to face the consequences to move on. I don't know anything about how baptism into another church may affect someone, but your heart is in the right place and if it makes you feel guilty that you were baptized, at the least, it will be a HUGE weight off of you to say what happened and get it out of the way. Good luck! Remember you are a child of God and he wants us all with Him again and we are all sinners in some way or another. I think your offense is one you can overcome easily -- even if it does mean being baptized again in the future.

[olytitan]

I'm not even sure I would say you technically "apostatized"...but you did lose your way for a while. Prodigal son...father took him back with loving arms -- all forgiven in the end. You missed some good times along your life of some experiences with the gospel but it's no reason to not work your way through your feelings. Your bishop is not there to judge you and make you feel horrible. Exactly the opposite. When we are humble and truly repentant we are usually harder on ourselves than God will be. Some people request to have their names removed from church records...which would be something else entirely I think.

[olytitan]

Thank you I need a lot of prayers and hugs. My mother died 2 years ago and I am sure she is up there having a hand in all of this. She was really into genealogy and I got that calling. I really appreciate all of the support it has been a rough 26 years. Thank you Classylady.

I really liked seeing this! Our family is so invested in us even after they die. I hope your mother is helping your in miraculous ways. It's great that you recognize some of that. Did you talk to the Bishop already? I would like to know how that went and how relieved you may feel having it over with.

[EarlJibbs]

I'm not even sure I would say you technically "apostatized"...but you did lose your way for a while. Prodigal son...father took him back with loving arms -- all forgiven in the end. You missed some good times along your life of some experiences with the gospel but it's no reason to not work your way through your feelings. Your bishop is not there to judge you and make you feel horrible. Exactly the opposite. When we are humble and truly repentant we are usually harder on ourselves than God will be. Some people request to have their names removed from church records...which would be something else entirely I think.

He is not there to judge you superficially as others might. But make no mistake that he is there to judge you. That is one of his callings, to be a "Judge in Isreal"

You are absolutely correct that he is not there to make anyone feel bad though. We do that to ourselves plenty :)

Edited May 25, 2012 by EarlJibbs

[paw722]

Does this sound Ok to Give to the Pastor?

Pastor

I wanted to let you know after much thought and prayer and guidance from the Lord I have chosen to return to the LDS church in which I was brought up in. I have come to this conclusion on my own after many many years of my heart and head playing tug of war and feel that my rightful place is at the LDS faith. I do appreciate all the fellowship that the members have given me over the years and that I was made to feel welcome while I was at the Lutheran Church, But it is just not where I feel happy and at peace. My LDS faith has always been a part of who I am and will continue to be. So please take my name off of your records as a Member of Saint Paul’s Lutheran Church Missouri Synod

[paw722]

I also will give a copy of this to the Bishop when I talk with him....I am trying to get my ducks in a row. I have been finding great comfort in reading the Book Of Mormon. And also great support from all of you THANKS