Guest Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 or lack thereof. When do they start caring, and how can I help the process along (without shaming said preteen)? My first one was not like this. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 How PRE is pre-teen? If they're young enough, I'd just say, "Ok, it's time for a bath." At some point I'd say, "Sweetheart, please go take a bath." If there's complacency or resistance, I'd say, "No, seriously. You need a bath." <staring contest> "Please... Go... take... a bath." That seems to do it for me. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 Almost 11. I do, and always get a little resistance. It's bathing. . . wearing clean clothes. . . wearing appropriate undergarments. . . combing hair in the morning. . . pretty much anything under the hygiene umbrella. I have to remind and nag and push for it to get done. I feel like, at this age I shouldn't have to remind every single day. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jane_Doe Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 I'm guessing she's resisting because it's not a priority for her. I'm guessing that compliments when she does do it will go a lot further than nagging. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beefche Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 Ewoyn, when I was in the YW presidency in my ward (2 times), we had a hygiene night for our girls--mainly the Beehives and Mia Maids. We discussed things such as deodorant, tampons, pads (and disposing of them), makeup, bathing, shampoo, brush hair, shaving legs, etc. We found that sometimes they just won't listen to mom, but get their YW leaders involved and for some reason we knew what we were talking about. We had a hair dresser and Mary Kay consultant in the ward, so we made it really fun. I know that a couple of the girls took our advice to heart as the 2 came up to us individually to ask additional questions. Oh what fun that was when she asked me to show her how to insert a tampon.... If your Faith in God Leader or YW leaders are considered "cool" by the girls, see if they would feel comfortable having clean night or something. You can find a fun and creative theme. If we are talking boys, well, I don't have much experience with them. Maybe have dad have a man to man talk with him--or get someone from the ward to speak to him more privately. I'm not sure how the same thing would go over for the boys. Jane_Doe 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ironhold Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 My sense of smell was beginning to fail me at that age due to a mix of injury and illness. As such, I simply didn't understand what I smelt like and so didn't see the need for hygiene under most circumstances. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 What I teach my kids:1.) Your body is a temple. You want to keep this temple clean and fresh.2.) Be a leader. It will be more difficult to inspire people and have them listen to you or follow you or hire you for a job if your breath and armpit stinks.3.) First impressions are powerful. What you wear will reflect on who people think you are. You don't want people's first impression of you be that of a slob. Traditions:1.) Wear boxer briefs and A-shirt. This is their preparation for wearing garments.2.) We have night clothes, day clothes, going out clothes, school clothes, Sunday clothes, performance clothes separated in their closet. (Kids learn to pay attention to what they're wearing and its appropriateness for the occasion).3.) When the kids turn 12, we go on a hunt for his "scent". We go through this ritual of trying to match the kids' personality, likes, dislikes, with a particular scent. For example - my firstborn is an outdoorsy type who likes to climb trees so he decides his scent is "Forest". My other kid likes things to do with water - he has an aquarium a turtle tank, loves the beach, etc. He decides his scent is "Ocean". So on the weekend after their 12th bday, they go to the mall and find things like cologne, lotion, deodorant, body wash in that scent. Encourages them to use these things. I have no problems with their hygiene so far. My problem is them keeping their rooms from looking like the aftermath of a hurricane. Hope this helps. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bini Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 I posted about this maybe three or four years ago, seeking advice for a teen-aged niece that was going to stay with us, and never showered! Someone on here recommended leaving a folded towel out on the bathroom sink countertop as a reminder. But from the sounds of it, this method is not in-your-face enough for what you're dealing with, Eowyn. I would say, keep on encouraging the showers or baths, even if you need to get serious about it. When a parent is telling a child what to do, I think it often sounds nagging, regardless of your tone :) But hygiene and health are important, so they're definitely things to be more aggressive about, and not passive. Is this a male or female child? I think this is a good age, too, to talk about how our bodies change and when we don't wash they get smelly! Again, as another has said, some kids aren't interested in self care right off the bat and others are very diligent about it. I still wouldn't throw in the towel, so to speak, I'd keep on "reminding" - telling - if needs be. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fran Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 Mine is a year older than yours and I have always had to constantly remind her that she needs to :- take her shower when she comes back from school (usually I need to repeat 10 times a day before she goes)- put body lotion so her skin isn't itchy- brush her teeth after meals and lately she likes using mouthwash to rinse (good for her!). In the morning it's tough as well I still need to make sure she washes her face and brushes her teeth and wear clean clothes.Brushing hair too, otherwise she'd end up with dreadlocks ! Twice a week she needs to wash her hair, I also buy her body scrubs.I think it's cool to make kids choose different type of bodywash and it can smell peach pear strawberry etc I teach her specific hygiene when she has her period and make sure she has what she needs to change and clean herself at school. I have a feeling I will always have to supervise her otherwise it doesn't come natural for her ! I think most kids need to shower everyday after school but truth is, we don't need to shower every single day if we don't do lots of physical work or activities. Most people shower to feel fresh and smell good, but skipping shower once in a while doesn't make us dirty. I try to use more and more natural bodywash and deodorant to protect my skin because washing too often is agressive for the skin and natural defenses. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
classylady Posted October 30, 2015 Report Share Posted October 30, 2015 (edited) My grandson is 12 and we still have to remind him to shower. He is at that age where his armpits start to stink if he doesn't shower. We buy him deodorant, but it seems like it just sits on the bathroom shelf and he doesn't use it. If we don't tell him to take a shower he won't. So, we remind, and we cajole. I have him smell his armpits, and he says "yuck". But, it still hasn't made much of an impact. When he gets out of the shower, I will have to "smell" him, because he doesn't wash. He just stands under the shower, and might only wash his hair. He has come out of the shower and his armpits still stink. This particular grandson has Asperger's (high-functioning), so I don't know if this has something to do with it, or if it's just his personality. Edited October 30, 2015 by classylady Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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