sister_in_faith

Im afraid to start a new thread, but I would like to ask the faith of the people who read this, in praying for me... As you may know I have a brain tumor. We do periodic MRI's to see if it has grown at all (it's 3.5 cm last time we checked)... Last night I was supposed to get my MRI, but they could only do half of it because they couldn't get an IV in (I have tough veins)... Today I went in and they used the ultra sound (which I told them they would need the first time, but I think I got the new guy... he wouldn't even try to get an IV in my shoulder! I kept encouraging him to try again, but he finally said he hit his 'stick limit' haaaaa!) anyway, they finally got the vein, injected the contrast, and did the MRI... Anyway (sorry that was a ramble!)... I need the results to come back that the tumor has stayed the same and not grown any. pray for me? thanks! I just have to add the funny part to this story... So, as anyone knows who has given the techs a difficult time in finding a vein, they stand there and rub and massage your arms and try to find veins with their fingers... so this went on for a LONG time... I called my boyfriend to tell him I was on my way home, and told him what happened, I told him that they missed the vein, and that I got "felt up" by a couple of guys for about 15 minutes... he responded, "so... YOU had a good time at least, right?" Maybe it was only funny at the time, but it sure broke the ice and got me giggling in the middle of a stressful situation!

Just a thought... I just found NAMI is active in my area and I am taking a class called 'peer-to-peer'. Im only 3 weeks into it (we meet once a week), but everyone in the class (including mentors) have mental illness. It is interesting to listen to other people talk about their issues, and to realize that I'm not as abnormal as I have thought in the past. We all have medication issues. We all have relapse issues. And none of it is 'our' fault. =) you should look into it in your area. they have support groups too (I haven't tried that tho)... Im not bipolar, but I have major depression, an anxiety disorder, and PTSD... happy to help!

I'm praying for you!

This is what I feel was 'hostile'. Perhaps a better word was sarcastic. I don't know. I guess I have always felt like sarcasm is a form of hostility (passive aggressive perhaps?)... Dravin maybe you can clarify how I should have interpreted those posts? And while you are at it, could you explain what I have done to upset you, if in fact I have earned your disapproval? And let's not rehash the common law thing... I already made clear that it's a non issue to me. at this point it's kind of:deadhorse:

The reason I started this thread was because I had a sincere question about temple service. It seems to have spun out in a different direction, which I'm sure happens a lot, and that's fine. I have been 100% open and honest with people's very personal questions in hope of helping my 'new online friends' understand my situation. That has backfired on me. I have never sought anyone's opinion on the status of my relationship with my boyfriend, and to be honest, right now I really don't care what anyone's opinion is. I have consulted an attorney (which I already said... I only looked up the definition of a single word on wikipedia, I did not consult them for legal advice, which should be plainly obvious to anyone who has read my posts, ugh!) and I have consulted my bishop, and my previous bishop on the matter. I hope this doesn't hurt anyone's feelings, but I will take the advice of my bishop over posts on lds.net. I feel comfortable with the advice my priesthood leaders have given me. I don't understand all the ins and outs of church policy, and I don't know why we qualify to be sealed after his death. You would have to ask my bishop. Insofar as if Dravin is 'judgemental' or not... I would better describe my experince with him as 'hostile'. I am a very devout member of the LDS faith. I am a 32 year old virgin, and I live up to my covenants faithfully. I literally feel sick to my stomach reading the above post... Im sorry I can't figure out how to get it to quote on this post... I have never had anyone question my worthiness like this before, but believe me the people for whom I do temple work, and the people who help perform the ordinances, are happy to see me come to the temple. I am a good, kind, loving person. I have kept my faith up despite huge obsticles and discrimination that comes with being the only member in a family in a mostly non LDS community. I am worthy of my recommend. It doesn't matter if I am 'legally' married. The church is very well aware of my situation. They are fine with me living with my boyfriend. They know that I want to be sealed to him. I want to be married to him, I made that clear in an earlier post also. I just know that right now, he doesn't want to. This is a personal matter. I'm sorry that I answered questions earlier. I should have just said, My bishop knows my situation, he gave me a recommend, and that should be enough for you guys. I'm too open, too honest, too gulible I guess. Anyway. I am not, and have not, solicited opinions on my legal marrital status. I have also not, and will not, open up the floor to discussion my worthiness for a temple recommend. Please respect me, as a sister, and drop this... it has gone beyond a lively discussion into open hostility, disrespect, and questioning something that is very precious to me, my worth. To everyone who posted honestly helpful posts, THANK YOU!!!

When I was little some guy (a friend of my mom's I think, I don't remember) gave me a box full of coins and bills from other countries. I loved that collection and would pull it out and look at all the different shapes and sizes and colors... my mom got rid of it for some inexplicable reason. I often wonder how much that collection was worth. Even if it wasn't worth much, it was really cool, and I would love to start another collection!!! When I was in the caribbean I got as much currency as I could and have it around here somewhere... you guys are inspiring me!

But in all seriousness and respect to topic of the thread... I think it is unfortunate, but I think that being religious often times does make people more judgemental. I think it may have to do with each of us trying to hard to live the life, and then when we see someone else who isn't we are like, "hey? they aren't..." fill in whatever they are doing or not doing. I know that about a year ago I caught myself starting to think that way, and it was a consious decision to stop. I has taken a little while, but I'm happy with where I am now. I agree with an earlier poster who asked how we can truly be religious if we are judgmental... Amen sister!

this post is dedicated to dravin this is from wikipedia - Judgemental: of, relating to, or dependent on judgement sorry... i couldn't help it. ps... this post has been misunderstood... i do not mean to imply that dravin IS judgemental... he made it very clear that he disapproves of the use of wikipedia for research purposes... this thread was discussing the definition of judgement so I posted a definition of the word judgement and implied that it was from wikipedia just to give him a hard time. this was just a joke. seriously. im sorry it was taken otherwise.

:):):)

From Wikipedia: Cohabitation usually refers to an arrangement whereby two people decide to live together on a long-term or permanent basis in an emotionally and/or sexually intimate relationship. The term is most frequently applied to couples who are not married. More broadly, the term can also mean any number of people living together. We fit as having an emotionally intimate relationship (notice the and/or part). just another thought AND I just realized that this week is 'Mental Illness Awareness Week'... I hope that my situation can be helpful to others, and maybe will help everyone to be a little more understanding with your fellow brothers and sisters who are in the same boat I am. We have to be so careful about judging someone else's situation, especially when we don't have the details. We also have to realize that no one really 'owes' us an explanation about their situation. As members of the church we should be content with letting the priesthood leaders who are in charge handle it, and let that be sufficient for our curiosity. I am not saying this directed at this message board, but really towards members of my ward, and members of other's who are in my situation's wards... It is really difficult to deal with everyone's disapproval when you know you haven't done anything wrong or immoral. I'm just saying let's judge a little less, and love a little more!

As to why we haven't gotten married yet.... you would have to ask him personally why. I don't understand it myself. He is a lot older than me, and was married once before. The first marriage did not go well at all. He simply says he doesn't want to 'be' married. I started looking into the legalities of common law marriage when I started worrying if we could be sealed or not if something happened to him (he is older than me, and he works in a dangerous profession). I didn't look into it to try and get anything out of it. I never even brought that up during the temple recommend discussion. This is kind of a non issue to me. I have been given permission to get sealed to him and that's all I wanted. I just brought the point up because I do call him my husband a lot, and if I did that in a post, I didn't want someone to go "Huh?". To confuse the situation a little more... He is fine with me telling people we are married. He doesn't correct people who call him my husband. He is fine with me wearing a wedding ring, and he would be okay with me changing my last name to his. Men!!! I just don't understand them sometimes! Can any guy relate to the "I don't want to be married" concept? It confuses the heck out of me.

maybe the church should 'rent' garments instead of selling them. of course it would be a one time 'rental fee' and the patrons would not be asked for the garments back unless there was something being done that didn't go along with how the church asks the garments to be used... have patrons sign a one time agreement that they will never sell garments, and make it illegal, that way they could prosecute someone for selling garments??? just a thought... hummm

Just a guy... I have run it by a lawyer... the biggest thing I would have to prove (if I was trying to prove our common-law status in court) is that we have held ourselves out to be a married couple. I wear a wedding ring most of the time, and I call him my husband half the time. That was the only thing the attorney stressed. Everything else was just fine. But your post makes me think I should talk to another one just to be sure. Hummmmm.... my bishops have always told me that if he passes away that i would be able to be sealed to him a year later, which makes me think that the common law status must be valid. I donno.

I feel uncomfortable having the original post just hanging out there... hope it's okay to edit it!

Mr. Doe feel free to call me out on something pretty personal in a very open manner!!! My boyfriend and I started seeing each other before I joined the church. We had started living each other, but were not engaged in any sort of inappropriate behavior. As I have said before, my health rapidly declined to the point where I could not function on my own. I had to have someone administer medications to me daily. I could not live on my own if I wanted to. Before I could be baptized I had to meet with the mission president to make sure that it was okay for me to be baptized while I lived with a male not of my family. He gave me permission. When it came time to recieve my temple recommend my boyfriend was brought in and spoke with the bishop. Our situation was unchanged, and I recieved the go ahead to recieve my endowment. As you can see I hide nothing about my situation from my priesthood leaders. They understand the need that my boyfriend fills, and they also know that we are living in accordance to my covenants. Insofar as being common-law married, we are. We fit all the requirements according to state law. My boyfriend does not want to get married right now, but several of my past and my current bishops who know all the details tell me that if he was to pass away, I could, one year later, do his temple work, and be sealed to him for time and eternity. That is good enough for me, so I try not to rock the boat. Does that answer your questions, or would you like more detail? Ps. Mr. Doe the use of the term "shacking up" is derogatory and offensive to me. The whole tone of your post makes it seem like I am doing something I am not supposed to do, which we can see is clearly not the case. I don't know what I have done to provoke your disapproval, but it seems sad to me that we, on an LDS website, cannot just have a fun conversation without being disrespected. ugh. The problem with us Christians is that some times we don't act very christlike, do we? And with that! Im going to bed.

I have a boyfriend (we are technically common-law married, so sometimes I do call him my husband, confusing, i know...) who I love very dearly. We have been together for 7ish years, and I am always writing him love notes and telling him I love him... but im trying to think of other little things I can do that let him know I am thinking about him. He has a very dangerous job (he is a police officer) so I am constantly telling him to be safe and reminding him that I love him... What else can I do? any ideas? (not romantic... we aren't 'officially' married... yet!)

Forgive me for getting back to the original post, and, remember I'm a convert, so I'm don't have as much teaching to fall back on, but isn't Jesus the 'spirit child' of Heavenly Father (aka God). I never understood that Jesus WAS a God. What am I missing?

Aside from protesters, I understand why they would want to buy garments.... but is this just a normal thing?

As I mentioned in a different post, I just got a new computer and am rediscovering the internet. I was surprised to find that you can buy garments on ebay... I was under the impression that this was illegal in some way, or that the church tried to stop this from happening??? What's the deal with that, and why would a non endowed person want garments anyway? Im just confused and surprised...

awesome talk!

It's funny, I've never lived in Utah, but I have heard a lot of negative things about living there. They say that members of the church there are very competitive amongst each other as to who can be "more righteous", and that Sunday meetings are more about who is wearing what than the meetings themselves... I have NO idea if any of that is even remotely true, but I know that listening to sisters who used to live in Utah talk about it cured me of any desire I had to move to Utah. Please tell me that this isn't true!!! It really gets me down to think that these things could even be close to the way things really are!

After reading the original post that started this thread I felt very moved to answer with a post of my own. I haven't read the rest of the thread, I just wanted to answer with what was in my heart... I know that I am not able to respond to what the critics say about our church, but I CAN definately tell you where my faith comes from. It comes from the holy spirit. When I read and prayed about the BOM I felt a peace and felt sure that it was true. When I go to the temple, I feel the spirit, and he whispers to me that I am in the right place. When i meet with my bishop, the holy spirit speaks to both of us, and I know without a doubt that he is divinely inspiried to help me. When I pray, or as I live in accordance to the gospel, I feel the spirit, and it tells me that this is the true church, and that I am doing the right things. I am not impressed by human beings, but by the spirit of God. He teaches me truth, and inspires me to do better. There is no better witness than this!

You are so awesome! I know that my honey's support means everything to me, even tho he's not a member. Just the fact that you are interested means a lot. Keep up the good work!

annewandering... AMEN! ps... you made my day! thanks!

You guys remember a few months ago when that guy said the rapture was going to take place at a certain time, and other people spent their life savings making posters and stuff advertising that it was going to happen? I really felt so sorry for those people, still do. I can't imagine truly believing that this was going to happen, making those beliefs public, and then being publicly embarassed when it doesn't. Ugh, I don't know why my heart goes out for them so much, but it does. Reading this thread brought those feelings back to me. I guess my take away is that we do need to be ready, because it could happen at any time... I hope I'm ready when it does happen! Where is that oil when you need it? <looking for my oil>